Discussion 3

Discussion----Minimum 1 page AMA format site all sources

Written communication is a necessary skill for public health professionals. It is important for your writing to be clear and not raise more questions than answers.

Read the Introduction/background section of the attached- Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine - and discuss its strengths and weaknesses. Given the title of the paper, what information would you have wanted the authors to include?

Response Post----Minimum 1/2-1 page AMA format cite all sources

Respond to the 3 classmates posts below. Your response should be more than re-echoing their thoughts. Clearly articulate why you agree or disagree with them, and ask follow up questions if necessary.

Classmate Carter

The paper given to us this week discussed the importance of consuming adequate fruit and vegetables in our daily diet.1 In the introduction the writer discussed how eating fruits and vegetables more, lowers the risks of developing chronic disease and a better quality of life.1 The writer also provides information about the relationship between fruits and vegetables and how not having proper nutritional status about the benefits is causing poor health outcomes in children around the United States.1

The writer goes on to discussing the benefits of fruits and vegetables but also discusses other interesting facts about breastfeeding and promotion. Although, the information maybe pertinent for the remainder of the writer’s paper, there was some confusion with the flow and focus of the paper. The writer also didn’t focus on Portland, Maine or any community in the area which made me believe that they should have chosen the United States or stuck with providing only information about Portland.

Furthermore, the writer discussed the major determinants of the nutritional status of children but didn’t go in depth. I also thought some of the wording that the writer chose wasn’t appropriate for example, “I am going to tell you what the United States needs to do to improve these numbers.” I believe the writer should hone in on focusing more on Portland, ME and the low consumption of fruits and vegetables among children like their title states. Not eating enough fruits and vegetables is a health burden and interventions to increase consumption of fruits and vegetables is a priority. Therefore, the writer should focus more on that subject and not breastfeeding, or the other variables mentioned.2

 

References

1. University of New England (UNE). Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine. https://elearn.une.edu/bbcswebdav/courses/21964-201902-GPH-747 AB1/Improving&20the%20the%20Nutritional%20Status%20of%20Children%20in%20Portland.pdf. Accessed September 17, 2018.

2. “Interventions for Increasing Eating of Fruit and Vegetables in Children Aged Five Years and Under.” Drug Treatments for Constipation Caused by Antipsychotic Medications, www.cochrane.org/CD008552/VASC_interventions-increasing-eating-fruit-and-vegetables-children-aged-five-years-and-under. Accessed September 17, 2018

Classmate Ahmed

        The strength of the article is that is provided a clear background on nutrition and informed us about the national, and state goals surrounding nutrition. The article also provides resources and citations that further explain why this health issue is important to address. The quoted information is from reliable sources, but this information was not properly explained or evaluated upon. 

The weakness of the article is that it does not evaluate on the current nutritional status of children in Portland. From the title "Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine" it is expected that the background would explain how the nutritional status is being evaluated1. The paper also mentions the U.S have poor nutritional standards in comparison to other nations, but data to support this statement is not provided. Although there is some information that informs readers about poor nutrition in Portland children, it is not enough to understand how serious the health issue. Towards the end the purpose is stated as "In this paper, I am going to tell you what the United States needs to do to improve these numbers" this contradicts the title because it clearly says the focus is not national but rather specifically in Portland, Maine1. It is important that the title and background provide a clear message to readers about what the article focuses on1. 

The focus of this paper is extremely important, and this paper has potential to inform readers on the current status of children’s health in Portland. Data from this paper can be used to develop programs, policies and projects that will improve health all throughout the nation. This is only possible if the writer clearly states and presents his research and data in accordance with the title of the paper.  Resources: 

1. University of New England (UNE). Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine. https://elearn.une.edu/bbcswebdav/courses/21964-201902-GPH-747 AB1/Improving&20the%20the%20Nutritional%20Status%20of%20Children%20in%20Portland.pdf. Accessed September 18, 2018.

Classmate Carmody

Analyzing the research paper, “Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine” 1 allows students to evaluate various components that should be included into the background section of a research/capstone paper.

To begin, one primary strength present throughout this research paper is that the author utilizes facts and quotations from reputable sources, such as the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the American Public Health Association. Further, an additional strength is that the introduction (first paragraph) highlights the nutritional importance of fruit and vegetable consumption; thus subsequently portraying the need for national public health intervention, to increase produce consumption rates among children. Ultimately, factors as such depict potential strengths of the introduction section of a research/capstone paper.

In contrast, several weaknesses are present throughout this paper. First, grammatical/formatting errors exist. For example, the author begins his/her essay by writing “CDC,” instead of fully spelling out “Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.” This is problematic because it assumes that readers are automatically familiar with the organization. Secondly, professional organizations, such as American Public Health Association should be italicized. In addition to grammatical errors, there are various lengthy quotes utilized throughout the author’s introduction section. To improve readability, the writer should instead summarize the information into his/her own words, while still ensuring to use quotes appropriately. To continue, the overall paper lacks consistent flow. Rather than having a linear process, 2 it skips around from topic to topic. Lastly, the research paper title implies that the researcher will study nutritional status of children in Portland, Maine, however, the final paragraph states, “In this paper, I am going to tell you what the United States needs to do to improve these numbers.” Thus, the title is entirely contradictory of the paper’s content. Ultimately, factors as such depict potential weaknesses of the introduction section of a research/capstone paper.

To conclude, both strengths and weaknesses are present throughout the research/capstone paper, “Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine.” 1 To improve the overall quality of the paper, the research should fix grammatical mistakes regarding professional public health organizations, use shorter quotations, improve overall flow, and focus data on Portland, Maine; to properly address the paper’s title.

References:

Improving the Nutritional Status of Children in Portland, Maine. University of New England. https://elearn.une.edu/bbcswebdav/courses/21964-201902-GPH-747-AB1/Improving%20the%20Nutritional%20Status%20of%20Children%20in%20Portland.pdf. Accessed September 18, 2018.

Writing a Research Paper. The Writing Center: University of Wisconsin-Madison Website. Updated March 5, 2018. https://writing.wisc.edu/Handbook/PlanResearchPaper.html. Accessed September 18, 2018.