I need a discussion question answered withing 10 hours

According to strategies discussed in Chapter 4 of the textbook, post a message in which you explain the techniques you will use for your introductory paragraph and why they might be effective for you. Then write or revise your introductory paragraph using the techniques you have chosen. Post your introduction along with your explanation.

Directions: at least 100 words; at least one internal citation; no first/second person pronouns or contractions. Remember that a reference at the end is not the same as an internal citation. Direct quotations require a p. or para. number, and be careful with the punctuation with internal citations.

https://lc.gcumedia.com/eng105/writing-with-purpose/v1.1/#/chapter/4

Introduction

College students are often tempted to write essays the night before they are due and then submit them as is. Even in the professional world, employees may send out emails, letters, or other forms of work-related material before checking for errors. Website pages are sometimes published without a second thought as to checking and double-checking for errors. This method, however, will almost always result in the author seeing the mistakes later and feeling embarrassed for not editing first.

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Revision and editing are critical to the writing process. While brainstorming and drafting, writers should focus on getting their thoughts out and the content down; this is not the time to revise. Later during the revision stage, the writer should focus on revising the material and proofreading for grammatical errors. Even best-selling authors must still revise and edit because mistakes are always made, and often writers do not notice them the first time they revise. The best writers edit over and over again before turning in a final submission. This is the way the author is most likely to create organized content that is well written. As writing expert William Zinsser (2006) said, “Rewriting is the essence of writing well—where the game is won or lost” (p. 83).

Many writers, including students, often do not like the idea of editing or are not sure how to go about it. Sometimes writers assume that editing is simply looking for grammatical errors or that they do not have the skills to self-edit or peer edit; however, because a reader knows when a concept does not make sense, a sentence is too wordy or awkward, or an argument jumps to conclusions, any reader can revise and edit. Often, reading out loud to oneself or to someone else can help to locate where revisions are necessary.

Genre, Revision, and Editing

Because genre is interrelated with purpose and audience, it is important to consider who the audience is and what the purpose is while revising. Recall the discussion of genre in Chapter 3.

Revision means to “see again.” It is the act of reading written material and rewriting and changing areas that need to be corrected. Revision generally focuses on “big picture” items, such as the standard parts of an essay, organization and flow, and generalizations and biases.

Editing is the act of reading written material that has been revised and correcting conventions related to grammar and mechanics. Editing generally focuses on detailed items such as grammar, mechanics, and writing styles.

Revision

When self-revising or even peer revising, an editor should focus first on higher level concerns rather than small or minor details. The following are the elements a writer should look for when revising.

Introduction Content and Style

Recall that the purpose of the introduction is to draw readers in and engage readers in the writing. In addition, the introduction discusses the background of the subject. It can be tempting to be overly opinionated or passionate in the introduction, but it is important to know your audience and how your introduction may affect your readers. Writers should be aware of how they frame the introduction for their readers. When revising an introduction, ask the following questions:

· Is the opening catchy?

· Will the opening engage the reader?

· Is the opening easy to understand?

· Is the introduction appropriate for the genre?

· Will the opening appeal to the audience?

Thesis Statement

While a thesis statement may vary depending on the genre of the essay, generally, in first-year composition classes, a thesis statement is the paper’s central argument, is one sentence long, and is located at the end of the introduction. Thesis statements are typically written in third person statements; however, there are some exceptions to this. The thesis must make a statement as to what the essay is trying to prove in order to avoid irrelevant information.

When revising a thesis, ask the following questions:

· What point of view does the thesis statement employ?

· Does the thesis avoid statements like “This essay/paper will talk about…”?

· Is the thesis too broad?

· Is the thesis too narrow?

· Is the thesis argumentative?

· Is the thesis a question?

· Is the thesis not a fact or an observation?

· Is the thesis located in an appropriate place?

· Is the thesis an exaggeration?

· Is the thesis a generalization?

· Is the thesis vague or general?

· Does the content in the essay support and refer back to the thesis?

· Does the thesis meet the genre requirements?

· Does the thesis answer why and how?

· Does the thesis directly state or imply the essay’s central argument?

When revising the thesis, also keep the genre in mind. Tables 4.1 and 4.2 contain examples of thesis statements based on the type of essays written in this course.

EXAMPLES:

1. After reviewing Chapter 4 of the text book, a technique that can be used to improve the introductory paragraph would be to make the opening catchy and easy to understand. Also making the thesis statement is informative and genre specific to ADHD and the increase in diagnosis.

Introductory paragraph:

Over the past several years there has been an increase in diagnoses regarding ADHD in children and young adults. While there are many reasons for the increase in diagnoses it has been found that as of 2012 there has been an increased number of children with ADHD in the U.S. by 22%. (Brown University Child & Adolescent Psychopharmacology Update, 2013). Another attribute to such a large increase would physicians’ and parents’ changed attitude towards diagnosing attention/hyperactivity problems. More parents appear to consider ADHD diagnosis and treatment as a means to improve their child’s academic achievements, commonly with the aid of medications. This change in attitude may also be associated with the dramatic increase in female ADHD diagnosis prevalence (Davidovitch, M. et al., 2017) The cause for increase was found to be because of over-diagnosis, greater awareness to this disorder by parents and misdiagnoses by physicians.

2. Within this new introductory paragraph that will be using a revision. Starting out with an open catchy tone that makes the reader want to find out more. Kind of like starting with, diagnosed with ADHD is way overuse and treated with medicine. Getting with the reader engage to read more on this, medication for ADHD might not have any real proof that is effective in the years to come. The next thing would be a sentence that plays of what is to come in the thesis statement. Then coming into it would be a somewhat is some that will tie in the ending. The ending will be the thesis statement that covers what the next three paragraphs will be in and what order.

The impact of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) treatments using therapy over medications are willing to help people understand how to help people with ADHD. With new treatments or medication’s coming out every day, but what would be good to know is the impact of the therapy of the person with ADHD or how it may impact the parent or the people around them. According to CBC Wed site, “Behavior therapy can include behavior therapy training for parents, behavior therapy with children, or a combination. Teachers can also use behavior therapy to help reduce problem behaviors in the classroom.” (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 2019) Doctors tend to treat the ADHD as in prescribing them to try therapy for the children as a first response, then followed by medications if needed. Working with ADHD might be started being treated or being treating without medications, and why behavioral therapy.

3. Looking back at chapter four, a good way to revise the introductory paragraph is to re-write it. In revising my introductory paragraph I had to add a little more information and re-write it.

ADHD or attention deficit hyperactive disorder is a mental disorder that effects the lives of many children across the globe. ADHD causes many behavior issues in the classroom, due to condition children can lose focus on classwork quickly. Although the disorder can be treated with medication and patience from parents and educators, there are a few trends that can effect children’s schooling. The main issue that seems to affect children suffering with ADHD is behavior in the class room. The most recent trends being inattentiveness in the classroom, academic failure, and lack of participation. These trends have a negative impact on children’s learning within the class room and often causes them to fail classes.