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Marriage Therapist Interview

Abraham De La Cruz Doctor of Education - Community Care and Counseling - Marriage and Family, Liberty University EDCO 811: Marriage Counseling

Dr. Steven Brooks June 19, 2026

Marriage Therapist Interview

As for this assignment, I interviewed Dr. Sarah Mitchell, who is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). She has been in private practice and community mental health for over 14 years, working with couples. The interview covered her professional experiences, the most frequent dilemmas couples present in counseling, the counseling models she employs, specific intervention techniques, approaches to separation and divorce, and the incorporation of biblical principles into therapy. The discussion was helpful for understanding how evidence-based counseling practices and the Christian faith can complement each other in strengthening marriages.

Therapist's Training and Educational Background

Dr. Mitchell shared that she went to school for a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology and then got her Master's Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. Upon graduating, she underwent supervised clinical training required for state licensure. She has also been certified in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Level 2 Gottman Method Couples Therapy. She has attended continuing education courses throughout her career on trauma, family systems, conflict resolution, and Christian counseling.

She has been working with couples for about 14 years. Over this time, she has counseled newly married couples, couples preparing for marriage, military families, blended families, and couples recovering from infidelity. She noted that every relationship is unique, but many couples experience similar emotional patterns regardless of their age or background. She feels the need for continuing education as research in marriage and family therapy continues to develop. She keeps up to date with the latest clinical literature and takes part in clinical workshops to enhance her clinical practice.

Three Most Common Issues Presented by Couples

Dr. Mitchell said the biggest issue that couples come to counseling with is communication. Many times, partners feel like they are talking about the problem, but they are reacting, rather than responding. She said that active listening, emotional regulation, and respectful communication are necessary components of healthy communication. This observation was rather close to what was Sasaki and Overall (2023) highlighted on need to be responsive, and not reactive, during the conflict.

The second common issue is broken trust. Infidelity, dishonesty, financial secretiveness, pornography, or repeated broken promises can break trust. Rebuilding trust means being honest, accountable, and changing one's behavior over time, Dr. Mitchell said. Trust can be expected to come back pretty fast for the couple, but healing is more likely to happen slowly and requires multiple behaviors of trustworthiness.

The third most common problem is unprocessed conflict and emotional disconnection. Some couples may not bring up uncomfortable subjects due to fear of conflict. Over time, emotional distance increases and resentment develops. Some spouses start to treat each other more like roommates than partners. He said that unhealed pain can lead to a vicious cycle of negative interactions and can be hard to manage without help. She urges couples to solve issues early so that they don't get entrenched in resentment.

Theoretical Orientations and Counseling Models

Dr. Mitchell said that she does not use just one counseling model. Instead, she takes a holistic view and incorporates multiple evidence-based strategies based on the couple’s needs. She mainly uses Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). She explained that EFT works with couples to bring into awareness the negative patterns of interaction and to identify the emotions found within anger and criticism (Johnson et al., 2022). Many arguments are rooted in fear, loneliness, rejection, or insecurity, and not the topic at hand. EFT empowers partners to feel vulnerable emotions safely and deepens emotional connection.

She also has a frequent use of the Gottman Method. This model can assist couples in their friendship and trust-building, in minimizing destructive communication, and in learning skills to manage conflicts (Peluso et al., 2026). Dr. Mitchell especially values techniques that help couples recognize criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling before these behaviors damage the relationship further. When appropriate, she incorporates Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques. These interventions assist the couple to uncover unhealthy thoughts that affect their emotional response and relationship actions. She also utilizes the perspective of Family Systems Theory to seek to comprehend the impact of family dynamics and upbringing on adult marriages.

Tools and Techniques Used During Counseling

The therapist explained some useful methods that she employs in sessions with customers. Communication coaching is one important tool. Couples learn how to use ‘I’ statements rather than blaming language. For instance, rather than making personal attacks, they learn to say, "I felt hurt when that happened. This approach defuses defensiveness and encourages healthier conversations. She is also a trainer of emotional regulation strategies. Couples develop an awareness of physical cues and indications of their own escalating anger, including hands clenching, quicker breathing, heart rate increase, or volume of voice. If emotions get too strong, she suggests planned time-outs before embarking on tough conversations. She said this way, there is no reactive response, and spouses come back when they are emotionally ready to listen.

Another crucial skill is learning to recognize unhealthy relationship patterns. Couples no longer blame each other, but rather they recognize that the negative interaction pattern is the real enemy. This change makes it easier for partners to collaborate rather than compete against each other. Dr. Mitchell frequently assigns homework between sessions. Daily appreciation exercises, active listening practice, forgiveness exercises, weekly relationship meetings, and conflict journals are included in these assignments. She feels that persistent practice outside of therapy will change for the long-term. She also employs the tools of relationship assessments to determine strengths and weaknesses. These evaluations are used to set treatment targets and assess progress along the way. The therapist commented that counseling should teach couples life-long relationship skills that they use after therapy.

Addressing Separation, Divorce, and Remarriage

Dr. Mitchell explained that some couples begin counseling after already discussing separation or divorce. She does not rush into either choice, but instead, she carefully assesses both partners' relationship. She looks into each spouse's concerns, level of commitment, emotional safety, and commitment to being open and honest in the counselling process. If there are issues of abuse, continuous affairs, addiction, or serious mental health problems, she will directly address those issues, since not all problems can be solved through relationship counseling. Safety is always paramount.

When both partners are ready to work on the marriage, she creates a step-by-step treatment plan. She often concentrates on rebuilding trust, enhancing communication, addressing conflict, and re-establishing emotional connection. She said many couples' hopes are restored when they learn the unhealthy interaction patterns that are perpetuating their issues.

If there is no possibility of reconciliation, Dr. Mitchell can assist in a mutually respectful divorce while trying to avoid an excessive amount of conflict. If children are involved, counseling may address healthy co-parenting, communication in a healthy manner, and minimize emotional harm to the family. She offers premarital counseling to couples preparing for remarriage that addresses past relationship experiences, expectations, parenting, finances, communication, and spiritual beliefs. She feels that the longevity of a marriage is dependent on being well-prepared (Mäki et al., 2025). Comment by Steve Brooks: Please review samples of scholarly literature to get a better idea of how citations are best employed. Generally, citations should be used to support academic concepts. Citations should not be employed for assertions that might indicate that the authors are commenting on your perspective or on the specifics of an assignment, like characters in a case study.

Role of Faith and Integration of Biblical Principles

Dr. Mitchell explained that faith plays an important role whenever couples desire Christian counseling. She does not impose her own religious convictions on clients but is happy to incorporate biblical principles when asked for counselling with a religious focus. She regularly speaks on forgiveness, grace, humility, sacrificial love, patience, honesty, and reconciliation from a biblical perspective. She said scripture does call the spouses to forgive each other, but to be truthful and held accountable. Forgiveness does not remove consequences but enables healing to start where repentance exists. If both spouses are at ease, prayer can be incorporated into sessions. She sometimes recommends Scripture reading, devotional activities, and participation in a healthy church community to strengthen spiritual growth alongside emotional healing.

The therapist specifically connected responsive communication with biblical wisdom. She said that the Bible tells believers to be "quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. This is in line with the course lecture discussing the importance of thinking about what you are going to say and not emotion during conflict. She also said that unhealthy control based on anger, manipulation, shame or the silent treatment goes against God's design for loving relationships. Rather, Christian marriage depicts mutual respect, servant leadership, humility, and unconditional love. Dr. Mitchell has a strong conviction that the best counseling is grounded in both clinical competence and biblical truth for emotional, relational, and spiritual concerns. Comment by Steve Brooks: Where?

References

Mäki, M., Hägglund, A. E., Rotkirch, A., Kulathinal, S., & Myrskylä, M. (2025). Stable marital histories predict happiness and health across educational groups. European Journal of Population, 41(1). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10680-025-09733-x

Sasaki, E., & Overall, N. C. (2023). Constructive conflict resolution requires tailored responsiveness to specific needs [Review of Constructive Conflict Resolution Requires Tailored Responsiveness to Specific Needs]. Elsevier, 52, 101638–101638. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.copsyc.2023.101638

Peluso, P. R., Irvine, T., & Marquez, A. (2026). Couples satisfaction, relationship status, and symptom change after Gottman method couples therapy for infidelity: A dyadic analysis. Psychotherapy Research, 1–13. https://doi.org/10.1080/10503307.2026.2689634