MANAGING INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

conflict management: PART ONE: ASSESSING YOUR BEHAVIORS

GOALS OF THE ASSIGNMENT:

1. To provide students with information about how to become aware of patterns of behaviors and how to manage these behaviors during a conflict.

2. To help students understand how to practice separating conflict behaviors from interpretations of conflict behaviors.

3. To encourage students to recognize the feelings during the conflict.

4. To evaluate the impact based on expressing or not expressing the feeling.

5. To practice being provisional vs interpretive of others’ behaviors.

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Identify A Conflict:

a. Describe a conflict that you have engaged in (or currently engaged in).

b. Think about how you have behaved (or are behaving) in this conflict as you try to manage/come to a resolution.

2. Questions

a. Thinking of the conflict above, explain the difference between the observation of your behaviors from the interpretation of your behaviors?

b. Thinking of this conflict above in concert with studying conflict, what would have done differently in how you managed or are managing this conflict?

c. Why is it important to be tentative about your interpretations of others’ behaviors?

3. Name the Feeling

Thinking about the same conflict, answer the following questions.

a. How difficult is/was it to come up with words to label feelings you might experience in this conflict situation?

b. What would be the impact of the message you would be sending if feelings were not expressed?

c. What are the barriers that prevent clear expressions of feelings during the conflict?

d. What suggestions do you have about how to overcome these barriers?

e. Are there any situations in which feelings should not be expressed in a conflict? Explain.

f. What can you do to find out what others are feeling?