Discussion

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Chapter 4

Nonverbal Communication

When we think about communication, we most often focus on how we exchange

information using words. While verbal communication is important, humans

relied on nonverbal communication for thousands of years before we developed

the capability to communicate with words. Nonverbal communication is a

process of generating meaning using behavior other than words. Rather than

thinking of nonverbal communication as the opposite of or as separate from

verbal communication, it’s more accurate to view them as operating side by

side—as part of the same system. Yet, as part of the same system, they still have

important differences, including how the brain processes them. For instance,

nonverbal communication is typically governed by the right side of the brain and

verbal, the left.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 2–8. This hemispheric

distinction has been clearly evidenced, as people who suffer trauma to the right

side of their brain lose the ability to recognize facial expressions but can still

process verbal communication. Conversely, people whose left hemisphere of the

brain is damaged lose the ability to speak, read, and understand language.

Interestingly, a person with damage to the left hemisphere of the brain who loses

the ability to speak can often still sing since the creation, but not the reading, of

music is governed by the right brain. The content and composition of verbal and

nonverbal communication also differs. In terms of content, nonverbal

communication tends to do the work of communicating emotions more than

verbal. In terms of composition, although there are rules of grammar that

structure our verbal communication, no such official guides govern our use of

nonverbal signals. Likewise, there aren’t dictionaries and thesauruses of

nonverbal communication like there are with verbal symbols. Finally, whereas we

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humans are unique in our capacity to abstract and transcend space and time

using verbal symbols, we are not the only creatures that engage in nonverbal

communication.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research,

Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 49. These are just some

of the characteristics that differentiate verbal communication from nonverbal,

and in the remainder of this chapter we will discuss in more detail the principles,

functions, and types of nonverbal communication and conclude with some

guidance on how to improve our nonverbal communication competence.

4.1 Principles and Functions of Nonverbal Communication

L E A R N I N G O B J E C T I V E S

1. Define nonverbal communication.

2. Compare and contrast verbal communication and nonverbal communication.

3. Discuss the principles of nonverbal communication.

4. Provide examples of the functions of nonverbal communication.

As you’ll recall from our introductory chapter, a channel is the sensory route on

which a message travels. Oral communication only relies on one channel, because

spoken language is transmitted through sound and picked up by our ears.

Nonverbal communication, on the other hand, can be taken in by all five of our

senses. Since most of our communication relies on visual and auditory channels,

those will be the focus of this chapter. But we can also receive messages and

generate meaning through touch, taste, and smell. Touch is an especially

powerful form of nonverbal communication that we will discuss in this chapter,

but we will not get into taste and smell, which have not received as much

scholarly attention in relation to nonverbal communication as the other senses.

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To further define nonverbal communication, we need to distinguish between

vocal and verbal aspects of communication. Verbal and nonverbal

communication include both vocal and nonvocal elements, andTable 4.1 "Vocal

and Nonvocal Elements of Communication" shows the relationship among vocal,

nonvocal, verbal, and nonverbal aspects of communication. A vocal element of

verbal communication is spoken words—for example, “Come back here.” A vocal

element of nonverbal communication isparalanguage, which is the vocalized but

not verbal part of a spoken message, such as speaking rate, volume, and pitch.

Nonvocal elements of verbal communication include the use of unspoken

symbols to convey meaning. Writing and American Sign Language (ASL) are

nonvocal examples of verbal communication and are not considered nonverbal

communication. Nonvocal elements of nonverbal communication include body

language such as gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact. Gestures are

nonvocal and nonverbal since most of them do not refer to a specific word like a

written or signed symbol does.

Table 4.1 Vocal and Nonvocal Elements of Communication

Verbal Communication Nonverbal Communication

Vocal Spoken words Paralanguage (pitch, volume, speaking rate, etc.)

Nonvocal Writing, sign language Body language (gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, etc.)

Source: Adapted from Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction:

Research, Theory, and Practice(London: Routledge, 2011), 45.

Principles of Nonverbal Communication

Nonverbal communication has a distinct history and serves separate evolutionary

functions from verbal communication. For example, nonverbal communication is

primarily biologically based while verbal communication is primarily culturally

based. This is evidenced by the fact that some nonverbal communication has the

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same meaning across cultures while no verbal communication systems share that

same universal recognizability.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication:

Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 17. Nonverbal

communication also evolved earlier than verbal communication and served an

early and important survival function that helped humans later develop verbal

communication. While some of our nonverbal communication abilities, like our

sense of smell, lost strength as our verbal capacities increased, other abilities like

paralanguage and movement have grown alongside verbal complexity. The fact

that nonverbal communication is processed by an older part of our brain makes it

more instinctual and involuntary than verbal communication.

Nonverbal Communication Conveys Important Interpersonal and Emotional Messages

You’ve probably heard that more meaning is generated from nonverbal

communication than from verbal. Some studies have claimed that 90 percent of

our meaning is derived from nonverbal signals, but more recent and reliable

findings claim that it is closer to 65 percent.Laura K. Guerrero and Kory

Floyd, Nonverbal Communication in Close Relationships (Mahwah, NJ:

Lawrence Erlbaum, 2006): 2.We may rely more on nonverbal signals in

situations where verbal and nonverbal messages conflict and in situations where

emotional or relational communication is taking place.Owen Hargie, Skilled

Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London:

Routledge, 2011), 47. For example, when someone asks a question and we’re not

sure about the “angle” they are taking, we may hone in on nonverbal cues to fill in

the meaning. For example, the question “What are you doing tonight?” could

mean any number of things, but we could rely on posture, tone of voice, and eye

contact to see if the person is just curious, suspicious, or hinting that they would

like company for the evening. We also put more weight on nonverbal

communication when determining a person’s credibility. For example, if a

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classmate delivers a speech in class and her verbal content seems well-researched

and unbiased, but her nonverbal communication is poor (her voice is monotone,

she avoids eye contact, she fidgets), she will likely not be viewed as credible.

Conversely, in some situations, verbal communication might carry more meaning

than nonverbal. In interactions where information exchange is the focus, at a

briefing at work, for example, verbal communication likely accounts for much

more of the meaning generated. Despite this exception, a key principle of

nonverbal communication is that it often takes on more meaning in interpersonal

and/or emotional exchanges.

Nonverbal Communication Is More Involuntary than Verbal

There are some instances in which we verbally communicate involuntarily. These

types of exclamations are often verbal responses to a surprising stimulus. For

example, we say “owww!” when we stub our toe or scream “stop!” when we see

someone heading toward danger. Involuntary nonverbal signals are much more

common, and although most nonverbal communication isn’t completely

involuntary, it is more below our consciousness than verbal communication and

therefore more difficult to control.

The involuntary nature of much nonverbal communication makes it more

difficult to control or “fake.” For example, although you can consciously smile a

little and shake hands with someone when you first see them, it’s difficult to fake

that you’re “happy” to meet someone. Nonverbal communication leaks out in

ways that expose our underlying thoughts or feelings. Spokespeople, lawyers, or

other public representatives who are the “face” of a politician, celebrity,

corporation, or organization must learn to control their facial expressions and

other nonverbal communication so they can effectively convey the message of

their employer or client without having their personal thoughts and feelings leak

through. Poker players, therapists, police officers, doctors, teachers, and actors

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are also in professions that often require them to have more awareness of and

control over their nonverbal communication.

Have you ever tried to conceal your surprise, suppress your anger, or act joyful

even when you weren’t? Most people whose careers don’t involve conscious

manipulation of nonverbal signals find it difficult to control or suppress them.

While we can consciously decide to stop sending verbal messages, our nonverbal

communication always has the potential of generating meaning for another

person. The teenager who decides to shut out his dad and not communicate with

him still sends a message with his “blank” stare (still a facial expression) and lack

of movement (still a gesture). In this sense, nonverbal communication is

“irrepressible.”Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions(Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 21.

Nonverbal Communication Is More Ambiguous

In Chapter 3 "Verbal Communication", we learn that the symbolic and abstract

nature of language can lead to misunderstandings, but nonverbal communication

is even more ambiguous. As with verbal communication, most of our nonverbal

signals can be linked to multiple meanings, but unlike words, many nonverbal

signals do not have any one specific meaning. If you’ve ever had someone wink at

you and didn’t know why, you’ve probably experienced this uncertainty. Did they

wink to express their affection for you, their pleasure with something you just

did, or because you share some inside knowledge or joke?

Just as we look at context clues in a sentence or paragraph to derive meaning

from a particular word, we can look for context clues in various sources of

information like the physical environment, other nonverbal signals, or verbal

communication to make sense of a particular nonverbal cue. Unlike verbal

communication, however, nonverbal communication doesn’t have explicit rules

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of grammar that bring structure, order, and agreed-on patterns of usage. Instead,

we implicitly learn norms of nonverbal communication, which leads to greater

variance. In general, we exhibit more idiosyncrasies in our usage of nonverbal

communication than we do with verbal communication, which also increases the

ambiguity of nonverbal communication.

Nonverbal Communication Is More Credible

Although we can rely on verbal communication to fill in the blanks sometimes left

by nonverbal expressions, we often put more trust into what people do over what

they say. This is especially true in times of stress or danger when our behaviors

become more instinctual and we rely on older systems of thinking and acting that

evolved before our ability to speak and write.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

18. This innateness creates intuitive feelings about the genuineness of nonverbal

communication, and this genuineness relates back to our earlier discussion about

the sometimes involuntary and often subconscious nature of nonverbal

communication. An example of the innateness of nonverbal signals can be found

in children who have been blind since birth but still exhibit the same facial

expressions as other children. In short, the involuntary or subconscious nature of

nonverbal communication makes it less easy to fake, which makes it seem more

honest and credible. We will learn more about the role that nonverbal

communication plays in deception later in this chapter.

Functions of Nonverbal Communication

A primary function of nonverbal communication is to convey meaning by

reinforcing, substituting for, or contradicting verbal communication. Nonverbal

communication is also used to influence others and regulate conversational flow.

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Perhaps even more important are the ways in which nonverbal communication

functions as a central part of relational communication and identity expression.

Nonverbal Communication Conveys Meaning

Nonverbal communication conveys meaning by reinforcing, substituting for, or

contradicting verbal communication. As we’ve already learned, verbal and

nonverbal communication are two parts of the same system that often work side

by side, helping us generate meaning. In terms of reinforcing verbal

communication, gestures can help describe a space or shape that another person

is unfamiliar with in ways that words alone cannot. Gestures also reinforce basic

meaning—for example, pointing to the door when you tell someone to leave.

Facial expressions reinforce the emotional states we convey through verbal

communication. For example, smiling while telling a funny story better conveys

your emotions.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research,

Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 51. Vocal variation can

help us emphasize a particular part of a message, which helps reinforce a word or

sentence’s meaning. For example, saying “How was your weekend?” conveys a

different meaning than “How was your weekend?”

Nonverbal communication can substitute for verbal communication in a variety

of ways. Nonverbal communication can convey much meaning when verbal

communication isn’t effective because of language barriers. Language barriers are

present when a person hasn’t yet learned to speak or loses the ability to speak.

For example, babies who have not yet developed language skills make facial

expressions, at a few months old, that are similar to those of adults and therefore

can generate meaning.Harriet Oster, Douglas Hegley, and Linda Nagel, “Adult

Judgments and Fine-Grained Analysis of Infant Facial Expressions: Testing the

Validity of A Priori Coding Formulas,” Developmental Psychology 28, no. 6

(1992): 1115–31. People who have developed language skills but can’t use them

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because they have temporarily or permanently lost them or because they are

using incompatible language codes, like in some cross-cultural encounters, can

still communicate nonverbally. Although it’s always a good idea to learn some of

the local language when you travel, gestures such as pointing or demonstrating

the size or shape of something may suffice in basic interactions.

Nonverbal communication is also useful in a quiet situation where verbal

communication would be disturbing; for example, you may use a gesture to signal

to a friend that you’re ready to leave the library. Crowded or loud places can also

impede verbal communication and lead people to rely more on nonverbal

messages. Getting a server or bartender’s attention with a hand gesture is

definitely more polite than yelling, “Hey you!” Finally, there are just times when

we know it’s better not to say something aloud. If you want to point out a person’s

unusual outfit or signal to a friend that you think his or her date is a loser, you’re

probably more likely to do that nonverbally.

Last, nonverbal communication can convey meaning by contradicting verbal

communication. As we learned earlier, we often perceive nonverbal

communication to be more credible than verbal communication. This is

especially true when we receive mixed messages, or messages in which verbal and

nonverbal signals contradict each other. For example, a person may say, “You

can’t do anything right!” in a mean tone but follow that up with a wink, which

could indicate the person is teasing or joking. Mixed messages lead to uncertainty

and confusion on the part of receivers, which leads us to look for more

information to try to determine which message is more credible. If we are unable

to resolve the discrepancy, we are likely to react negatively and potentially

withdraw from the interaction.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction:

Research, Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011),

52. Persistent mixed messages can lead to relational distress and hurt a person’s

credibility in professional settings.

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Nonverbal Communication Influences Others

Nonverbal communication can be used to influence people in a variety of ways,

but the most common way is through deception. Deception is typically thought of

as the intentional act of altering information to influence another person, which

means that it extends beyond lying to include concealing, omitting, or

exaggerating information. While verbal communication is to blame for the

content of the deception, nonverbal communication partners with the language

through deceptive acts to be more convincing. Since most of us intuitively believe

that nonverbal communication is more credible than verbal communication, we

often intentionally try to control our nonverbal communication when we are

engaging in deception. Likewise, we try to evaluate other people’s nonverbal

communication to determine the veracity of their messages. Students initially

seem surprised when we discuss the prevalence of deception, but their surprise

diminishes once they realize that deception isn’t always malevolent, mean, or

hurtful. Deception obviously has negative connotations, but people engage in

deception for many reasons, including to excuse our own mistakes, to be polite to

others, or to influence others’ behaviors or perceptions.

The fact that deception served an important evolutionary purpose helps explain

its prevalence among humans today. Species that are capable of deception have a

higher survival rate. Other animals engage in nonverbal deception that helps

them attract mates, hide from predators, and trap prey.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 276. To put it bluntly, the better at deception a creature is,

the more likely it is to survive. So, over time, the humans that were better liars

were the ones that got their genes passed on. But the fact that lying played a part

in our survival as a species doesn’t give us a license to lie.

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Aside from deception, we can use nonverbal communication to “take the edge off”

a critical or unpleasant message in an attempt to influence the reaction of the

other person. We can also use eye contact and proximity to get someone to move

or leave an area. For example, hungry diners waiting to snag a first-come-first-

serve table in a crowded restaurant send messages to the people who have

already eaten and paid that it’s time to go. People on competition reality

television shows like Survivorand Big Brother play what they’ve come to term a

“social game.” The social aspects of the game involve the manipulation of verbal

and nonverbal cues to send strategic messages about oneself in an attempt to

influence others. Nonverbal cues such as length of conversational turn, volume,

posture, touch, eye contact, and choices of clothing and accessories can become

part of a player’s social game strategy. Although reality television isn’t a reflection

of real life, people still engage in competition and strategically change their

communication to influence others, making it important to be aware of how we

nonverbally influence others and how they may try to influence us.

Nonverbal Communication Regulates Conversational Flow

Conversational interaction has been likened to a dance, where each person has to

make moves and take turns without stepping on the other’s toes. Nonverbal

communication helps us regulate our conversations so we don’t end up

constantly interrupting each other or waiting in awkward silences between

speaker turns. Pitch, which is a part of vocalics, helps us cue others into our

conversational intentions. A rising pitch typically indicates a question and a

falling pitch indicates the end of a thought or the end of a conversational turn.

We can also use a falling pitch to indicate closure, which can be very useful at the

end of a speech to signal to the audience that you are finished, which cues the

applause and prevents an awkward silence that the speaker ends up filling with

“That’s it” or “Thank you.” We also signal our turn is coming to an end by

stopping hand gestures and shifting our eye contact to the person who we think

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will speak next.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research,

Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 53. Conversely, we can

“hold the floor” with nonverbal signals even when we’re not exactly sure what

we’re going to say next. Repeating a hand gesture or using one or more verbal

fillers can extend our turn even though we are not verbally communicating at the

moment.

Nonverbal Communication Affects Relationships

To successfully relate to other people, we must possess some skill at encoding and

decoding nonverbal communication. The nonverbal messages we send and

receive influence our relationships in positive and negative ways and can work to

bring people together or push them apart. Nonverbal communication in the form

of tie signs, immediacy behaviors, and expressions of emotion are just three of

many examples that illustrate how nonverbal communication affects our

relationships.

Tie signs are nonverbal cues that communicate intimacy and signal the

connection between two people. These relational indicators can be objects such as

wedding rings or tattoos that are symbolic of another person or the relationship,

actions such as sharing the same drinking glass, or touch behaviors such as hand-

holding.Walid A. Afifi and Michelle L. Johnson, “The Nature and Function of Tie-

Signs,” inThe Sourcebook of Nonverbal Measures: Going beyond Words, ed.

Valerie Manusov (Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 2005): 190. Touch behaviors

are the most frequently studied tie signs and can communicate much about a

relationship based on the area being touched, the length of time, and the

intensity of the touch. Kisses and hugs, for example, are considered tie signs, but

a kiss on the cheek is different from a kiss on the mouth and a full embrace is

different from a half embrace. If you consider yourself a “people watcher,” take

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note of the various tie signs you see people use and what they might say about the

relationship.

Immediacy behaviors play a central role in bringing people together and have

been identified by some scholars as the most important function of nonverbal

communication.Peter A. Andersen and Janis F. Andersen, “Measures of

Perceived Nonverbal Immediacy,” in The Sourcebook of Nonverbal Measures:

Going beyond Words, ed. Valerie Manusov (Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum,

2005): 113–26.Immediacy behaviors are verbal and nonverbal behaviors that

lessen real or perceived physical and psychological distance between

communicators and include things like smiling, nodding, making eye contact,

and occasionally engaging in social, polite, or professional touch.Mark E.

Comadena, Stephen K. Hunt, and Cheri J. Simonds, “The Effects of Teacher

Clarity, Nonverbal Immediacy, and Caring on Student Motivation, Affective and

Cognitive Learning,” Communication Research Reports 24, no. 3 (2007):

241. Immediacy behaviors are a good way of creating rapport, or a friendly and

positive connection between people. Skilled nonverbal communicators are more

likely to be able to create rapport with others due to attention-getting

expressiveness, warm initial greetings, and an ability to get “in tune” with others,

which conveys empathy.Ronald E. Riggio, “Social Interaction Skills and

Nonverbal Behavior,” in Applications of Nonverbal Behavior Theories and

Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992),

12. These skills are important to help initiate and maintain relationships.

While verbal communication is our primary tool for solving problems and

providing detailed instructions, nonverbal communication is our primary tool for

communicating emotions. This makes sense when we remember that nonverbal

communication emerged before verbal communication and was the channel

through which we expressed anger, fear, and love for thousands of years of

human history.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

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Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 27. Touch and facial expressions

are two primary ways we express emotions nonverbally. Love is a primary

emotion that we express nonverbally and that forms the basis of our close

relationships. Although no single facial expression for love has been identified, it

is expressed through prolonged eye contact, close interpersonal distances,

increased touch, and increased time spent together, among other things. Given

many people’s limited emotional vocabulary, nonverbal expressions of emotion

are central to our relationships.

“Getting Real”

Teachers and Immediacy Behaviors

A considerable amount of research has been done on teachers’ use of immediacy

behaviors, which points to the importance of this communication concept in

teaching professions.Virginia P. Richmond, Derek R. Lane, and James C.

McCroskey, “Teacher Immediacy and the Teacher-Student Relationship,”

in Handbook of Instructional Communication: Rhetorical and Relational

Perspectives, eds. Timothy P. Mottet, Virginia P. Richmond, and James C.

McCroskey (Boston, MA: Pearson, 2006), 168. Immediacy behaviors are verbal

and nonverbal behaviors that lessen real or perceived physical and psychological

distance between communicators.Mark E. Comadena, Stephen K. Hunt, and

Cheri J. Simonds, “The Effects of Teacher Clarity, Nonverbal Immediacy, and

Caring on Student Motivation, Affective and Cognitive

Learning,” Communication Research Reports 24, no. 3 (2007): 241. Specific

nonverbal behaviors have been found to increase or decrease perceived levels of

immediacy, and such behaviors impact student learning, teacher’s evaluations,

and the teacher-student relationship.Virginia P. Richmond, Derek R. Lane, and

James C. McCroskey, “Teacher Immediacy and the Teacher-Student

Relationship,” in Handbook of Instructional Communication: Rhetorical and

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Relational Perspectives, eds. Timothy P. Mottet, Virginia P. Richmond, and

James C. McCroskey (Boston, MA: Pearson, 2006), 169, 184–85. Even those who

do not plan on going into teaching as a career can benefit from learning about

immediacy behaviors, as they can also be used productively in other

interpersonal contexts such as between a manager and employee, a salesperson

and a client, or a politician and constituent. Much of this research in teaching

contexts has focused on the relationship between immediacy behaviors and

student learning, and research consistently shows that effective use of immediacy

behaviors increases learning in various contexts and at various levels. Aside from

enhancing student learning, the effective use of immediacy behaviors also leads

to better evaluations by students, which can have a direct impact on a teacher’s

career. While student evaluations of teachers take various factors into

consideration, judgments of personality may be formed, as we learned in Chapter

2 "Communication and Perception", after only brief initial impressions. Research

shows that students make character assumptions about teachers after only brief

exposure to their nonverbal behaviors. Based on nonverbal cues such as

frowning, head nodding, pointing, sitting, smiling, standing, strong gestures,

weak gestures, and walking, students may or may not evaluate a teacher as open,

attentive, confident, dominant, honest, likable, anxious, professional, supportive,

or enthusiastic. The following are examples of immediacy behaviors that can be

effectively used by teachers:

• Moving around the classroom during class activities, lectures, and

discussions (reduces physical distance)

• Keeping the line of sight open between the teacher’s body and the students

by avoiding or only briefly standing behind lecterns / computer tables or

sitting behind a desk while directly interacting with students (reduces

physical distance)

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• Being expressive and animated with facial expressions, gestures, and voice

(demonstrates enthusiasm)

• Smiling (creates a positive and open climate)

• Making frequent eye contact with students (communicates attentiveness

and interest)

• Calling students by name (reduces perceived psychological distance)

• Making appropriate self-disclosures to students about personal thoughts,

feelings, or experiences (reduces perceived psychological distance, creates

open climate)

Teachers who are judged as less immediate are more likely to sit, touch their

heads, shake instead of nod their heads, use sarcasm, avoid eye contact, and use

less expressive nonverbal behaviors. Finally, immediacy behaviors affect the

teacher-student relationship. Immediacy behaviors help establish rapport, which

is a personal connection that increases students’ investment in the class and

material, increases motivation, increases communication between teacher and

student, increases liking, creates a sense of mutual respect, reduces challenging

behavior by students, and reduces anxiety.

1. Recall a teacher you have had that exhibited effective immediacy

behaviors. Recall a teacher you have had that didn’t exhibit immediacy

behaviors. Make a column for each teacher and note examples of specific

behaviors of each. Discuss your list with a classmate and compare and

contrast your lists.

2. Think about the teachers that you listed in the previous question. Discuss

how their behaviors affected your learning and your relationship.

3. How much should immediacy behaviors, relative to other characteristics

such as professionalism, experience, training, and content knowledge,

factor into the evaluation of teachers by their students, peers, and

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supervisors? What, if anything, should schools do to enhance teachers’

knowledge of immediacy behaviors?

Nonverbal Communication Expresses Our Identities

Nonverbal communication expresses who we are. Our identities (the groups to

which we belong, our cultures, our hobbies and interests, etc.) are conveyed

nonverbally through the way we set up our living and working spaces, the clothes

we wear, the way we carry ourselves, and the accents and tones of our voices. Our

physical bodies give others impressions about who we are, and some of these

features are more under our control than others. Height, for example, has been

shown to influence how people are treated and perceived in various contexts. Our

level of attractiveness also influences our identities and how people perceive us.

Although we can temporarily alter our height or looks—for example, with

different shoes or different color contact lenses—we can only permanently alter

these features using more invasive and costly measures such as cosmetic surgery.

We have more control over some other aspects of nonverbal communication in

terms of how we communicate our identities. For example, the way we carry and

present ourselves through posture, eye contact, and tone of voice can be altered

to present ourselves as warm or distant depending on the context.

Aside from our physical body, artifacts, which are the objects and possessions

that surround us, also communicate our identities. Examples of artifacts include

our clothes, jewelry, and space decorations. In all the previous examples, implicit

norms or explicit rules can affect how we nonverbally present ourselves. For

example, in a particular workplace it may be a norm (implicit) for people in

management positions to dress casually, or it may be a rule (explicit) that

different levels of employees wear different uniforms or follow particular dress

codes. We can also use nonverbal communication to express identity

characteristics that do not match up with who we actually think we are. Through

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changes to nonverbal signals, a capable person can try to appear helpless, a guilty

person can try to appear innocent, or an uninformed person can try to appear

credible.

K E Y T A K E A W A Y S

• Nonverbal communication is a process of generating meaning using behavior

other than words. Nonverbal communication includes vocal elements, which is

referred to as paralanguage and includes pitch, volume, and rate, and nonvocal

elements, which are usually referred to as body language and includes gestures,

facial expressions, and eye contact, among other things.

• Although verbal communication and nonverbal communication work side by side

as part of a larger language system, there are some important differences

between the two. They are processed by different hemispheres of the brain,

nonverbal communication conveys more emotional and affective meaning than

does verbal communication, nonverbal communication isn’t governed by an

explicit system of rules in the same way that grammar guides verbal

communication, and while verbal communication is a uniquely human ability,

many creatures including plants, birds, and mammals communicate nonverbally.

• Nonverbal communication operates on the following principles: nonverbal

communication typically conveys more meaning than verbal communication,

nonverbal communication is more involuntary than verbal communication,

nonverbal communication is often more ambiguous than verbal communication,

and nonverbal communication is often more credible than verbal

communication.

• Nonverbal communication serves several functions.

• Nonverbal communication affects verbal communication in that it can

complement, reinforce, substitute, or contradict verbal messages.

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• Nonverbal communication influences others, as it is a key component of

deception and can be used to assert dominance or to engage in compliance

gaining.

• Nonverbal communication regulates conversational flow, as it provides

important cues that signal the beginning and end of conversational turns and

facilitates the beginning and end of an interaction.

• Nonverbal communication affects relationships, as it is a primary means through

which we communicate emotions, establish social bonds, and engage in

relational maintenance.

• Nonverbal communication expresses our identities, as who we are is conveyed

through the way we set up our living and working spaces, the clothes we wear,

our personal presentation, and the tones in our voices.

E X E R C I S E S

1. Getting integrated: To better understand nonverbal communication, try to think

of an example to illustrate each of the four principles discussed in the chapter. Be

integrative in your approach by including at least one example from an academic,

professional, civic, and personal context.

2. When someone sends you a mixed message in which the verbal and nonverbal

messages contradict each other, which one do you place more meaning on?

Why?

3. Our personal presentation, style of dress, and surroundings such as a dorm room,

apartment, car, or office send nonverbal messages about our identities. Analyze

some of the nonverbal signals that your personal presentation or environment

send. What do they say about who you are? Do they create the impression that

you desire?

4.2 Types of Nonverbal Communication

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L E A R N I N G O B J E C T I V E S

1. Define kinesics.

2. Define haptics.

3. Define vocalics.

4. Define proxemics.

5. Define chronemics.

6. Provide examples of types of nonverbal communication that fall under these

categories.

7. Discuss the ways in which personal presentation and environment provide

nonverbal cues.

Just as verbal language is broken up into various categories, there are also

different types of nonverbal communication. As we learn about each type of

nonverbal signal, keep in mind that nonverbals often work in concert with each

other, combining to repeat, modify, or contradict the verbal message being sent.

Kinesics

The word kinesics comes from the root word kinesis, which means “movement,”

and refers to the study of hand, arm, body, and face movements. Specifically, this

section will outline the use of gestures, head movements and posture, eye contact,

and facial expressions as nonverbal communication.

Gestures

There are three main types of gestures: adaptors, emblems, and illustrators.Peter

A. Andersen,Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 36. Adaptorsare touching behaviors and movements that

indicate internal states typically related to arousal or anxiety. Adaptors can be

targeted toward the self, objects, or others. In regular social situations, adaptors

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result from uneasiness, anxiety, or a general sense that we are not in control of

our surroundings. Many of us subconsciously click pens, shake our legs, or

engage in other adaptors during classes, meetings, or while waiting as a way to do

something with our excess energy. Public speaking students who watch video

recordings of their speeches notice nonverbal adaptors that they didn’t know they

used. In public speaking situations, people most commonly use self- or object-

focused adaptors. Common self-touching behaviors like scratching, twirling hair,

or fidgeting with fingers or hands are considered self-adaptors. Some self-

adaptors manifest internally, as coughs or throat-clearing sounds. My personal

weakness is object adaptors. Specifically, I subconsciously gravitate toward

metallic objects like paper clips or staples holding my notes together and catch

myself bending them or fidgeting with them while I’m speaking. Other people

play with dry-erase markers, their note cards, the change in their pockets, or the

lectern while speaking. Use of object adaptors can also signal boredom as people

play with the straw in their drink or peel the label off a bottle of beer.

Smartphones have become common object adaptors, as people can fiddle with

their phones to help ease anxiety. Finally, as noted, other adaptors are more

common in social situations than in public speaking situations given the

speaker’s distance from audience members. Other adaptors involve adjusting or

grooming others, similar to how primates like chimpanzees pick things off each

other. It would definitely be strange for a speaker to approach an audience

member and pick lint off his or her sweater, fix a crooked tie, tuck a tag in, or pat

down a flyaway hair in the middle of a speech.

Emblems are gestures that have a specific agreed-on meaning. These are still

different from the signs used by hearing-impaired people or others who

communicate using American Sign Language (ASL). Even though they have a

generally agreed-on meaning, they are not part of a formal sign system like ASL

that is explicitly taught to a group of people. A hitchhiker’s raised thumb, the

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“OK” sign with thumb and index finger connected in a circle with the other three

fingers sticking up, and the raised middle finger are all examples of emblems that

have an agreed-on meaning or meanings with a culture. Emblems can be still or

in motion; for example, circling the index finger around at the side of your head

says “He or she is crazy,” or rolling your hands over and over in front of you says

“Move on.”

Just as we can trace the history of a word, or its etymology, we can also trace

some nonverbal signals, especially emblems, to their origins. Holding up the

index and middle fingers in a “V” shape with the palm facing in is an insult

gesture in Britain that basically means “up yours.” This gesture dates back

centuries to the period in which the primary weapon of war was the bow and

arrow. When archers were captured, their enemies would often cut off these two

fingers, which was seen as the ultimate insult and worse than being executed

since the archer could no longer shoot his bow and arrow. So holding up the two

fingers was a provoking gesture used by archers to show their enemies that they

still had their shooting fingers.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive

Book of Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 121.

Illustrators are the most common type of gesture and are used to illustrate the

verbal message they accompany. For example, you might use hand gestures to

indicate the size or shape of an object. Unlike emblems, illustrators do not

typically have meaning on their own and are used more subconsciously than

emblems. These largely involuntary and seemingly natural gestures flow from us

as we speak but vary in terms of intensity and frequency based on context.

Although we are never explicitly taught how to use illustrative gestures, we do it

automatically. Think about how you still gesture when having an animated

conversation on the phone even though the other person can’t see you.

Head Movements and Posture

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I group head movements and posture together because they are often both used

to acknowledge others and communicate interest or attentiveness. In terms of

head movements, a head nod is a universal sign of acknowledgement in cultures

where the formal bow is no longer used as a greeting. In these cases, the head nod

essentially serves as an abbreviated bow. An innate and universal head

movement is the headshake back and forth to signal “no.” This nonverbal signal

begins at birth, even before a baby has the ability to know that it has a

corresponding meaning. Babies shake their head from side to side to reject their

mother’s breast and later shake their head to reject attempts to spoon-feed.Allan

Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body Language (New York, NY:

Bantam, 2004), 232. This biologically based movement then sticks with us to be a

recognizable signal for “no.” We also move our head to indicate interest. For

example, a head up typically indicates an engaged or neutral attitude, a head tilt

indicates interest and is an innate submission gesture that exposes the neck and

subconsciously makes people feel more trusting of us, and a head down signals a

negative or aggressive attitude.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive

Book of Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 232–34.

There are four general human postures: standing, sitting, squatting, and lying

down.Owen Hargie,Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and

Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 63. Within each of these postures

there are many variations, and when combined with particular gestures or other

nonverbal cues they can express many different meanings. Most of our

communication occurs while we are standing or sitting. One interesting standing

posture involves putting our hands on our hips and is a nonverbal cue that we use

subconsciously to make us look bigger and show assertiveness. When the elbows

are pointed out, this prevents others from getting past us as easily and is a sign of

attempted dominance or a gesture that says we’re ready for action. In terms of

sitting, leaning back shows informality and indifference, straddling a chair is a

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sign of dominance (but also some insecurity because the person is protecting the

vulnerable front part of his or her body), and leaning forward shows interest and

attentiveness.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body

Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 243–44.

Eye Contact

We also communicate through eye behaviors, primarily eye contact. While eye

behaviors are often studied under the category of kinesics, they have their own

branch of nonverbal studies calledoculesics, which comes from the Latin

word oculus, meaning “eye.” The face and eyes are the main point of focus during

communication, and along with our ears our eyes take in most of the

communicative information around us. The saying “The eyes are the window to

the soul” is actually accurate in terms of where people typically think others are

“located,” which is right behind the eyes.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

40. Certain eye behaviors have become tied to personality traits or emotional

states, as illustrated in phrases like “hungry eyes,” “evil eyes,” and “bedroom

eyes.” To better understand oculesics, we will discuss the characteristics and

functions of eye contact and pupil dilation.

Eye contact serves several communicative functions ranging from regulating

interaction to monitoring interaction, to conveying information, to establishing

interpersonal connections. In terms of regulating communication, we use eye

contact to signal to others that we are ready to speak or we use it to cue others to

speak. I’m sure we’ve all been in that awkward situation where a teacher asks a

question, no one else offers a response, and he or she looks directly at us as if to

say, “What do you think?” In that case, the teacher’s eye contact is used to cue us

to respond. During an interaction, eye contact also changes as we shift from

speaker to listener. US Americans typically shift eye contact while speaking—

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looking away from the listener and then looking back at his or her face every few

seconds. Toward the end of our speaking turn, we make more direct eye contact

with our listener to indicate that we are finishing up. While listening, we tend to

make more sustained eye contact, not glancing away as regularly as we do while

speaking.Judith N. Martin and Thomas K. Nakayama, Intercultural

Communication in Contexts, 5th ed. (Boston, MA: McGraw-Hill, 2010), 276.

Aside from regulating conversations, eye contact is also used to monitor

interaction by taking in feedback and other nonverbal cues and to send

information. Our eyes bring in the visual information we need to interpret

people’s movements, gestures, and eye contact. A speaker can use his or her eye

contact to determine if an audience is engaged, confused, or bored and then

adapt his or her message accordingly. Our eyes also send information to others.

People know not to interrupt when we are in deep thought because we naturally

look away from others when we are processing information. Making eye contact

with others also communicates that we are paying attention and are interested in

what another person is saying. As we will learn in Chapter 5 "Listening", eye

contact is a key part of active listening.

Eye contact can also be used to intimidate others. We have social norms about

how much eye contact we make with people, and those norms vary depending on

the setting and the person. Staring at another person in some contexts could

communicate intimidation, while in other contexts it could communicate

flirtation. As we learned, eye contact is a key immediacy behavior, and it signals

to others that we are available for communication. Once communication begins,

if it does, eye contact helps establish rapport or connection. We can also use our

eye contact to signal that we do not want to make a connection with others. For

example, in a public setting like an airport or a gym where people often make

small talk, we can avoid making eye contact with others to indicate that we do not

want to engage in small talk with strangers. Another person could use eye contact

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to try to coax you into speaking, though. For example, when one person continues

to stare at another person who is not reciprocating eye contact, the person

avoiding eye contact might eventually give in, become curious, or become

irritated and say, “Can I help you with something?” As you can see, eye contact

sends and receives important communicative messages that help us interpret

others’ behaviors, convey information about our thoughts and feelings, and

facilitate or impede rapport or connection. This list reviews the specific functions

of eye contact:

• Regulate interaction and provide turn-taking signals

• Monitor communication by receiving nonverbal communication from

others

• Signal cognitive activity (we look away when processing information)

• Express engagement (we show people we are listening with our eyes)

• Convey intimidation

• Express flirtation

• Establish rapport or connection

Pupil dilation is a subtle component of oculesics that doesn’t get as much

scholarly attention in communication as eye contact does. Pupil dilation refers to

the expansion and contraction of the black part of the center of our eyes and is

considered a biometric form of measurement; it is involuntary and therefore seen

as a valid and reliable form of data collection as opposed to self-reports on

surveys or interviews that can be biased or misleading. Our pupils dilate when

there is a lack of lighting and contract when light is plentiful.Laura K. Guerrero

and Kory Floyd, Nonverbal Communication in Close Relationships (Mahwah,

NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 2006): 176. Pain, sexual attraction, general arousal,

anxiety/stress, and information processing (thinking) also affect pupil dilation.

Researchers measure pupil dilation for a number of reasons. For example,

advertisers use pupil dilation as an indicator of consumer preferences, assuming

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that more dilation indicates arousal and attraction to a product. We don’t

consciously read others’ pupil dilation in our everyday interactions, but

experimental research has shown that we subconsciously perceive pupil dilation,

which affects our impressions and communication. In general, dilated pupils

increase a person’s attractiveness. Even though we may not be aware of this

subtle nonverbal signal, we have social norms and practices that may be

subconsciously based on pupil dilation. Take for example the notion of mood

lighting and the common practice of creating a “romantic” ambiance with

candlelight or the light from a fireplace. Softer and more indirect light leads to

pupil dilation, and although we intentionally manipulate lighting to create a

romantic ambiance, not to dilate our pupils, the dilated pupils are still

subconsciously perceived, which increases perceptions of attraction.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions(Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 40–41.

Facial Expressions

Our faces are the most expressive part of our bodies. Think of how photos are

often intended to capture a particular expression “in a flash” to preserve for later

viewing. Even though a photo is a snapshot in time, we can still interpret much

meaning from a human face caught in a moment of expression, and basic facial

expressions are recognizable by humans all over the world. Much research has

supported the universality of a core group of facial expressions: happiness,

sadness, fear, anger, and disgust. The first four are especially identifiable across

cultures.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 35. However, the triggers for

these expressions and the cultural and social norms that influence their displays

are still culturally diverse. If you’ve spent much time with babies you know that

they’re capable of expressing all these emotions. Getting to see the pure and

innate expressions of joy and surprise on a baby’s face is what makes playing

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peek-a-boo so entertaining for adults. As we get older, we learn and begin to

follow display rules for facial expressions and other signals of emotion and also

learn to better control our emotional expression based on the norms of our

culture.

Smiles are powerful communicative signals and, as you’ll recall, are a key

immediacy behavior. Although facial expressions are typically viewed as innate

and several are universally recognizable, they are not always connected to an

emotional or internal biological stimulus; they can actually serve a more social

purpose. For example, most of the smiles we produce are primarily made for

others and are not just an involuntary reflection of an internal emotional

state.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 35. These social smiles,

however, are slightly but perceptibly different from more genuine smiles. People

generally perceive smiles as more genuine when the other person smiles “with

their eyes.” This particular type of smile is difficult if not impossible to fake

because the muscles around the eye that are activated when we spontaneously or

genuinely smile are not under our voluntary control. It is the involuntary and

spontaneous contraction of these muscles that moves the skin around our cheeks,

eyes, and nose to create a smile that’s distinct from a fake or polite smile.Dylan

Evans, Emotion: The Science of Sentiment (New York: Oxford University Press,

2001), 107. People are able to distinguish the difference between these smiles,

which is why photographers often engage in cheesy joking with adults or use

props with children to induce a genuine smile before they snap a picture.

We will learn more about competent encoding and decoding of facial expressions

in Section 4.3 "Nonverbal Communication Competence" andSection 4.4

"Nonverbal Communication in Context", but since you are likely giving speeches

in this class, let’s learn about the role of the face in public speaking. Facial

expressions help set the emotional tone for a speech. In order to set a positive

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tone before you start speaking, briefly look at the audience and smile to

communicate friendliness, openness, and confidence. Beyond your opening and

welcoming facial expressions, facial expressions communicate a range of

emotions and can be used to infer personality traits and make judgments about a

speaker’s credibility and competence. Facial expressions can communicate that a

speaker is tired, excited, angry, confused, frustrated, sad, confident, smug, shy, or

bored. Even if you aren’t bored, for example, a slack face with little animation

may lead an audience to think that you are bored with your own speech, which

isn’t likely to motivate them to be interested. So make sure your facial

expressions are communicating an emotion, mood, or personality trait that you

think your audience will view favorably, and that will help you achieve your

speech goals. Also make sure your facial expressions match the content of your

speech. When delivering something light-hearted or humorous, a smile, bright

eyes, and slightly raised eyebrows will nonverbally enhance your verbal message.

When delivering something serious or somber, a furrowed brow, a tighter mouth,

and even a slight head nod can enhance that message. If your facial expressions

and speech content are not consistent, your audience could become confused by

the mixed messages, which could lead them to question your honesty and

credibility.

Haptics

Think of how touch has the power to comfort someone in moment of sorrow

when words alone cannot. This positive power of touch is countered by the

potential for touch to be threatening because of its connection to sex and

violence. To learn about the power of touch, we turn to haptics, which refers to

the study of communication by touch. We probably get more explicit advice and

instruction on how to use touch than any other form of nonverbal

communication. A lack of nonverbal communication competence related to touch

could have negative interpersonal consequences; for example, if we don’t follow

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the advice we’ve been given about the importance of a firm handshake, a person

might make negative judgments about our confidence or credibility. A lack of

competence could have more dire negative consequences, including legal

punishment, if we touch someone inappropriately (intentionally or

unintentionally). Touch is necessary for human social development, and it can be

welcoming, threatening, or persuasive. Research projects have found that

students evaluated a library and its staff more favorably if the librarian briefly

touched the patron while returning his or her library card, that female restaurant

servers received larger tips when they touched patrons, and that people were

more likely to sign a petition when the petitioner touched them during their

interaction.Peter A. Andersen,Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 46.

There are several types of touch, including functional-professional, social-polite,

friendship-warmth, love-intimacy, and sexual-arousal touch.Richard Heslin and

Tari Apler, “Touch: A Bonding Gesture,” inNonverbal Interaction, eds. John M.

Weimann and Randall Harrison (Longon: Sage, 1983), 47–76. At the functional-

professional level, touch is related to a goal or part of a routine professional

interaction, which makes it less threatening and more expected. For example, we

let barbers, hairstylists, doctors, nurses, tattoo artists, and security screeners

touch us in ways that would otherwise be seen as intimate or inappropriate if not

in a professional context. At the social-polite level, socially sanctioned touching

behaviors help initiate interactions and show that others are included and

respected. A handshake, a pat on the arm, and a pat on the shoulder are examples

of social-polite touching. A handshake is actually an abbreviated hand-holding

gesture, but we know that prolonged hand-holding would be considered too

intimate and therefore inappropriate at the functional-professional or social-

polite level. At the functional-professional and social-polite levels, touch still has

interpersonal implications. The touch, although professional and not intimate,

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between hair stylist and client, or between nurse and patient, has the potential to

be therapeutic and comforting. In addition, a social-polite touch exchange plays

into initial impression formation, which can have important implications for how

an interaction and a relationship unfold.

Of course, touch is also important at more intimate levels. At the friendship-

warmth level, touch is more important and more ambiguous than at the social-

polite level. At this level, touch interactions are important because they serve a

relational maintenance purpose and communicate closeness, liking, care, and

concern. The types of touching at this level also vary greatly from more formal

and ritualized to more intimate, which means friends must sometimes negotiate

their own comfort level with various types of touch and may encounter some

ambiguity if their preferences don’t match up with their relational partner’s. In a

friendship, for example, too much touch can signal sexual or romantic interest,

and too little touch can signal distance or unfriendliness. At the love-intimacy

level, touch is more personal and is typically only exchanged between significant

others, such as best friends, close family members, and romantic partners.

Touching faces, holding hands, and full frontal embraces are examples of touch at

this level. Although this level of touch is not sexual, it does enhance feelings of

closeness and intimacy and can lead to sexual-arousal touch, which is the most

intimate form of touch, as it is intended to physically stimulate another person.

Touch is also used in many other contexts—for example, during play (e.g., arm

wrestling), during physical conflict (e.g., slapping), and during conversations

(e.g., to get someone’s attention).Stanley E. Jones, “Communicating with Touch,”

in The Nonverbal Communication Reader: Classic and Contemporary

Readings, 2nd ed., eds. Laura K. Guerrero, Joseph A. Devito, and Michael L.

Hecht (Prospect Heights, IL: Waveland Press, 1999). We also inadvertently send

messages through accidental touch (e.g., bumping into someone). One of my

interpersonal communication professors admitted that she enjoyed going to

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restaurants to observe “first-date behavior” and boasted that she could predict

whether or not there was going to be a second date based on the couple’s

nonverbal communication. What sort of touching behaviors would indicate a

good or bad first date?

During a first date or less formal initial interactions, quick fleeting touches give

an indication of interest. For example, a pat on the back is an abbreviated

hug.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 4. In general, the presence or

absence of touching cues us into people’s emotions. So as the daters sit across

from each other, one person may lightly tap the other’s arm after he or she said

something funny. If the daters are sitting side by side, one person may cross his

or her legs and lean toward the other person so that each person’s knees or feet

occasionally touch. Touching behavior as a way to express feelings is often

reciprocal. A light touch from one dater will be followed by a light touch from the

other to indicate that the first touch was OK. While verbal communication could

also be used to indicate romantic interest, many people feel too vulnerable at this

early stage in a relationship to put something out there in words. If your date

advances a touch and you are not interested, it is also unlikely that you will come

right out and say, “Sorry, but I’m not really interested.” Instead, due to common

politeness rituals, you would be more likely to respond with other forms of

nonverbal communication like scooting back, crossing your arms, or simply not

acknowledging the touch.

I find hugging behavior particularly interesting, perhaps because of my

experiences growing up in a very hug-friendly environment in the Southern

United States and then living elsewhere where there are different norms. A hug

can be obligatory, meaning that you do it because you feel like you have to, not

because you want to. Even though you may think that this type of hug doesn’t

communicate emotions, it definitely does. A limp, weak, or retreating hug may

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communicate anger, ambivalence, or annoyance. Think of other types of hugs and

how you hug different people. Some types of hugs are the crisscross hug, the

neck-waist hug, and the engulfing hug.Kory Floyd, Communicating Affection:

Interpersonal Behavior and Social Context (Cambridge: Cambridge University

Press, 2006), 33–34. The crisscross hug is a rather typical hug where each

person’s arm is below or above the other person’s arm. This hug is common

among friends, romantic partners, and family members, and perhaps even

coworkers. The neck-waist hug usually occurs in more intimate relationships as it

involves one person’s arms around the other’s neck and the other person’s arms

around the other’s waist. I think of this type of hug as the “slow-dance hug.” The

engulfing hug is similar to a bear hug in that one person completely wraps the

arms around the other as that person basically stands there. This hugging

behavior usually occurs when someone is very excited and hugs the other person

without warning.

Some other types of hugs are the “shake-first-then-tap hug” and the “back-slap

hug.” I observe that these hugs are most often between men. The shake-first-

then-tap hug involves a modified hand-shake where the hands are joined more

with the thumb and fingers than the palm and the elbows are bent so that the

shake occurs between the two huggers’ chests. The hug comes after the shake has

been initiated with one arm going around the other person for usually just one

tap, then a step back and release of the handshake. In this hugging behavior, the

handshake that is maintained between the chests minimizes physical closeness

and the intimacy that may be interpreted from the crisscross or engulfing hug

where the majority of the huggers’ torsos are touching. This move away from

physical closeness likely stems from a US norm that restricts men’s physical

expression of affection due to homophobia or the worry of being perceived as gay.

The slap hug is also a less physically intimate hug and involves a hug with one or

both people slapping the other person’s back repeatedly, often while talking to

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each other. I’ve seen this type of hug go on for many seconds and with varying

degrees of force involved in the slap. When the slap is more of a tap, it is actually

an indication that one person wants to let go. The video footage of then-president

Bill Clinton hugging Monica Lewinsky that emerged as allegations that they had

an affair were being investigated shows her holding on, while he was tapping

from the beginning of the hug.

“Getting Critical”

Airport Pat-Downs: The Law, Privacy, and Touch

Everyone who has flown over the past ten years has experienced the steady

increase in security screenings. Since the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001,

airports around the world have had increased security. While passengers have

long been subject to pat-downs if they set off the metal detector or arouse

suspicion, recently foiled terrorist plots have made passenger screening more

personal. The “shoe bomber” led to mandatory shoe removal and screening, and

the more recent use of nonmetallic explosives hidden in clothing or in body

cavities led to the use of body scanners that can see through clothing to check for

concealed objects.Andrew R. Thomas, Soft Landing: Airline Industry Strategy,

Service, and Safety (New York, NY: Apress, 2011), 117–23. Protests against and

anxiety about the body scanners, more colloquially known as “naked x-ray

machines,” led to the new “enhanced pat-down” techniques for passengers who

refuse to go through the scanners or passengers who are randomly selected or

arouse suspicion in other ways. The strong reactions are expected given what

we’ve learned about the power of touch as a form of nonverbal communication.

The new pat-downs routinely involve touching the areas around a passenger’s

breasts and/or genitals with a sliding hand motion. The Transportation Security

Administration (TSA) notes that the areas being examined haven’t changed, but

the degree of the touch has, as screeners now press and rub more firmly but used

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to use a lighter touch.Derek Kravitz, “Airport ‘Pat-Downs’ Cause Growing

Passenger Backlash,” The Washington Post, November 13, 2010, accessed June

23, 2012, http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-

dyn/content/article/2010/11/12/AR2010111206580.html?sid=ST201011300538

5. Interestingly, police have long been able to use more invasive pat-downs, but

only with probable cause. In the case of random selection at the airport, no

probable cause provision has to be met, giving TSA agents more leeway with

touch than police officers. Experts in aviation security differ in their assessment

of the value of the pat-downs and other security procedures. Several experts have

called for a revision of the random selection process in favor of more targeted

screenings. What civil rights organizations critique as racial profiling, consumer

rights activists and some security experts say allows more efficient use of

resources and less inconvenience for the majority of passengers.Andrew R.

Thomas, Soft Landing: Airline Industry Strategy, Service, and Safety (New

York, NY: Apress, 2011), 120. Although the TSA has made some changes to

security screening procedures and have announced more to come, some

passengers have started a backlash of their own. There have been multiple cases

of passengers stripping down to their underwear or getting completely naked to

protest the pat-downs, while several other passengers have been charged with

assault for “groping” TSA agents in retaliation. Footage of pat-downs of toddlers

and grandmothers in wheelchairs and self-uploaded videos of people recounting

their pat-down experiences have gone viral on YouTube.

1. What limits, if any, do you think there should be on the use of touch in

airport screening procedures?

2. In June of 2012 a passenger was charged with battery after “groping” a

TSA supervisor to, as she claims, demonstrate the treatment that she had

received while being screened. You can read more about the story and see

the video here:http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/carol-jean-

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price-accused-groping-tsa-agent-florida-woman-demonstrating-

treatment-received- article-1.1098521. Do you think that her actions we

justified? Why or why not?

3. Do you think that more targeted screening, as opposed to random

screenings in which each person has an equal chance of being selected for

enhanced pat-downs, is a good idea? Why? Do you think such targeted

screening could be seen as a case of unethical racial profiling? Why or why

not?

Vocalics

We learned earlier that paralanguage refers to the vocalized but nonverbal parts

of a message.Vocalics is the study of paralanguage, which includes the vocal

qualities that go along with verbal messages, such as pitch, volume, rate, vocal

quality, and verbal fillers.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms

and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 69–70.

Pitch helps convey meaning, regulate conversational flow, and communicate the

intensity of a message. Even babies recognize a sentence with a higher pitched

ending as a question. We also learn that greetings have a rising emphasis and

farewells have falling emphasis. Of course, no one ever tells us these things

explicitly; we learn them through observation and practice. We do not pick up on

some more subtle and/or complex patterns of paralanguage involving pitch until

we are older. Children, for example, have a difficult time perceiving sarcasm,

which is usually conveyed through paralinguistic characteristics like pitch and

tone rather than the actual words being spoken. Adults with lower than average

intelligence and children have difficulty reading sarcasm in another person’s

voice and instead may interpret literally what they say.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 26.

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Paralanguage provides important context for the verbal content of speech. For

example, volume helps communicate intensity. A louder voice is usually thought

of as more intense, although a soft voice combined with a certain tone and facial

expression can be just as intense. We typically adjust our volume based on our

setting, the distance between people, and the relationship. In our age of

computer-mediated communication, TYPING IN ALL CAPS is usually seen as

offensive, as it is equated with yelling. A voice at a low volume or a whisper can be

very appropriate when sending a covert message or flirting with a romantic

partner, but it wouldn’t enhance a person’s credibility if used during a

professional presentation.

Speaking rate refers to how fast or slow a person speaks and can lead others to

form impressions about our emotional state, credibility, and intelligence. As with

volume, variations in speaking rate can interfere with the ability of others to

receive and understand verbal messages. A slow speaker could bore others and

lead their attention to wander. A fast speaker may be difficult to follow, and the

fast delivery can actually distract from the message. Speaking a little faster than

the normal 120–150 words a minute, however, can be beneficial, as people tend

to find speakers whose rate is above average more credible and intelligent.David

B. Buller and Judee K. Burgoon, “The Effects of Vocalics and Nonverbal

Sensitivity on Compliance,” Human Communication Research 13, no. 1 (1986):

126–44. When speaking at a faster-than-normal rate, it is important that a

speaker also clearly articulate and pronounce his or her words. Boomhauer, a

character on the show King of the Hill, is an example of a speaker whose fast rate

of speech combines with a lack of articulation and pronunciation to create a

stream of words that only he can understand. A higher rate of speech combined

with a pleasant tone of voice can also be beneficial for compliance gaining and

can aid in persuasion.

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Our tone of voice can be controlled somewhat with pitch, volume, and emphasis,

but each voice has a distinct quality known as a vocal signature. Voices vary in

terms of resonance, pitch, and tone, and some voices are more pleasing than

others. People typically find pleasing voices that employ vocal variety and are not

monotone, are lower pitched (particularly for males), and do not exhibit

particular regional accents. Many people perceive nasal voices negatively and

assign negative personality characteristics to them.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

71. Think about people who have very distinct voices. Whether they are a public

figure like President Bill Clinton, a celebrity like Snooki from the Jersey Shore, or

a fictional character like Peter Griffin from Family Guy, some people’s voices

stick with us and make a favorable or unfavorable impression.

Verbal fillers are sounds that fill gaps in our speech as we think about what to say

next. They are considered a part of nonverbal communication because they are

not like typical words that stand in for a specific meaning or meanings. Verbal

fillers such as “um,” “uh,” “like,” and “ah” are common in regular conversation

and are not typically disruptive. As we learned earlier, the use of verbal fillers can

help a person “keep the floor” during a conversation if they need to pause for a

moment to think before continuing on with verbal communication. Verbal fillers

in more formal settings, like a public speech, can hurt a speaker’s credibility.

The following is a review of the various communicative functions of vocalics:

• Repetition. Vocalic cues reinforce other verbal and nonverbal cues (e.g.,

saying “I’m not sure” with an uncertain tone).

• Complementing. Vocalic cues elaborate on or modify verbal and

nonverbal meaning (e.g., the pitch and volume used to say “I love sweet

potatoes” would add context to the meaning of the sentence, such as the

degree to which the person loves sweet potatoes or the use of sarcasm).

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• Accenting. Vocalic cues allow us to emphasize particular parts of a

message, which helps determine meaning (e.g., “She is my friend,” or “She

is my friend,” or “She is my friend”).

• Substituting. Vocalic cues can take the place of other verbal or nonverbal

cues (e.g., saying “uh huh” instead of “I am listening and understand what

you’re saying”).

• Regulating. Vocalic cues help regulate the flow of conversations (e.g.,

falling pitch and slowing rate of speaking usually indicate the end of a

speaking turn).

• Contradicting. Vocalic cues may contradict other verbal or nonverbal

signals (e.g., a person could say “I’m fine” in a quick, short tone that

indicates otherwise).

Proxemics

Proxemics refers to the study of how space and distance influence

communication. We only need look at the ways in which space shows up in

common metaphors to see that space, communication, and relationships are

closely related. For example, when we are content with and attracted to someone,

we say we are “close” to him or her. When we lose connection with someone, we

may say he or she is “distant.” In general, space influences how people

communicate and behave. Smaller spaces with a higher density of people often

lead to breaches of our personal space bubbles. If this is a setting in which this

type of density is expected beforehand, like at a crowded concert or on a train

during rush hour, then we make various communicative adjustments to manage

the space issue. Unexpected breaches of personal space can lead to negative

reactions, especially if we feel someone has violated our space voluntarily,

meaning that a crowding situation didn’t force them into our space. Additionally,

research has shown that crowding can lead to criminal or delinquent behavior,

known as a “mob mentality.”Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication:

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Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 44. To better

understand how proxemics functions in nonverbal communication, we will more

closely examine the proxemic distances associated with personal space and the

concept of territoriality.

Proxemic Distances

We all have varying definitions of what our “personal space” is, and these

definitions are contextual and depend on the situation and the relationship.

Although our bubbles are invisible, people are socialized into the norms of

personal space within their cultural group. Scholars have identified four zones for

US Americans, which are public, social, personal, and intimate distance.Edward

T. Hall, “Proxemics,”Current Anthropology 9, no. 2 (1968): 83–95. The zones are

more elliptical than circular, taking up more space in our front, where our line of

sight is, than at our side or back where we can’t monitor what people are doing.

You can see how these zones relate to each other and to the individual in Figure

4.1 "Proxemic Zones of Personal Space". Even within a particular zone,

interactions may differ depending on whether someone is in the outer or inner

part of the zone.

Figure 4.1 Proxemic Zones of Personal Space

Public Space (12 Feet or More)

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Public and social zones refer to the space four or more feet away from our body,

and the communication that typically occurs in these zones is formal and not

intimate. Public space starts about twelve feet from a person and extends out

from there. This is the least personal of the four zones and would typically be

used when a person is engaging in a formal speech and is removed from the

audience to allow the audience to see or when a high-profile or powerful person

like a celebrity or executive maintains such a distance as a sign of power or for

safety and security reasons. In terms of regular interaction, we are often not

obligated or expected to acknowledge or interact with people who enter our

public zone. It would be difficult to have a deep conversation with someone at

this level because you have to speak louder and don’t have the physical closeness

that is often needed to promote emotional closeness and/or establish rapport.

Social Space (4–12 Feet)

Communication that occurs in the social zone, which is four to twelve feet away

from our body, is typically in the context of a professional or casual interaction,

but not intimate or public. This distance is preferred in many professional

settings because it reduces the suspicion of any impropriety. The expression

“keep someone at an arm’s length” means that someone is kept out of the

personal space and kept in the social/professional space. If two people held up

their arms and stood so just the tips of their fingers were touching, they would be

around four feet away from each other, which is perceived as a safe distance

because the possibility for intentional or unintentional touching doesn’t exist. It

is also possible to have people in the outer portion of our social zone but not feel

obligated to interact with them, but when people come much closer than six feet

to us then we often feel obligated to at least acknowledge their presence. In many

typically sized classrooms, much of your audience for a speech will actually be in

your social zone rather than your public zone, which is actually beneficial because

it helps you establish a better connection with them. Students in large lecture

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classes should consider sitting within the social zone of the professor, since

students who sit within this zone are more likely to be remembered by the

professor, be acknowledged in class, and retain more information because they

are close enough to take in important nonverbal and visual cues. Students who

talk to me after class typically stand about four to five feet away when they speak

to me, which keeps them in the outer part of the social zone, typical for

professional interactions. When students have more personal information to

discuss, they will come closer, which brings them into the inner part of the social

zone.

Personal Space (1.5–4 Feet)

Personal and intimate zones refer to the space that starts at our physical body

and extends four feet. These zones are reserved for friends, close acquaintances,

and significant others. Much of our communication occurs in the personal zone,

which is what we typically think of as our “personal space bubble” and extends

from 1.5 feet to 4 feet away from our body. Even though we are getting closer to

the physical body of another person, we may use verbal communication at this

point to signal that our presence in this zone is friendly and not intimate. Even

people who know each other could be uncomfortable spending too much time in

this zone unnecessarily. This zone is broken up into two subzones, which helps us

negotiate close interactions with people we may not be close to

interpersonally.Matthew McKay, Martha Davis, and Patrick Fanning, Messages:

Communication Skills Book, 2nd ed. (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications,

1995), 59. The outer-personal zone extends from 2.5 feet to 4 feet and is useful for

conversations that need to be private but that occur between people who are not

interpersonally close. This zone allows for relatively intimate communication but

doesn’t convey the intimacy that a closer distance would, which can be beneficial

in professional settings. The inner-personal zone extends from 1.5 feet to 2.5 feet

and is a space reserved for communication with people we are interpersonally

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close to or trying to get to know. In this subzone, we can easily touch the other

person as we talk to them, briefly placing a hand on his or her arm or engaging in

other light social touching that facilitates conversation, self-disclosure, and

feelings of closeness.

Intimate Space

As we breach the invisible line that is 1.5 feet from our body, we enter the

intimate zone, which is reserved for only the closest friends, family, and

romantic/intimate partners. It is impossible to completely ignore people when

they are in this space, even if we are trying to pretend that we’re ignoring them. A

breach of this space can be comforting in some contexts and annoying or

frightening in others. We need regular human contact that isn’t just verbal but

also physical. We have already discussed the importance of touch in nonverbal

communication, and in order for that much-needed touch to occur, people have

to enter our intimate space. Being close to someone and feeling their physical

presence can be very comforting when words fail. There are also social norms

regarding the amount of this type of closeness that can be displayed in public, as

some people get uncomfortable even seeing others interacting in the intimate

zone. While some people are comfortable engaging in or watching others engage

in PDAs (public displays of affection) others are not.

So what happens when our space is violated? Although these zones are well

established in research for personal space preferences of US Americans,

individuals vary in terms of their reactions to people entering certain zones, and

determining what constitutes a “violation” of space is subjective and contextual.

For example, another person’s presence in our social or public zones doesn’t

typically arouse suspicion or negative physical or communicative reactions, but it

could in some situations or with certain people. However, many situations lead to

our personal and intimate space being breached by others against our will, and

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these breaches are more likely to be upsetting, even when they are expected.

We’ve all had to get into a crowded elevator or wait in a long line. In such

situations, we may rely on some verbal communication to reduce immediacy and

indicate that we are not interested in closeness and are aware that a breach has

occurred. People make comments about the crowd, saying, “We’re really packed

in here like sardines,” or use humor to indicate that they are pleasant and well

adjusted and uncomfortable with the breach like any “normal” person would be.

Interestingly, as we will learn in our discussion of territoriality, we do not often

use verbal communication to defend our personal space during regular

interactions. Instead, we rely on more nonverbal communication like moving,

crossing our arms, or avoiding eye contact to deal with breaches of space.

Territoriality

Territoriality is an innate drive to take up and defend spaces. This drive is shared

by many creatures and entities, ranging from packs of animals to individual

humans to nations. Whether it’s a gang territory, a neighborhood claimed by a

particular salesperson, your preferred place to sit in a restaurant, your usual desk

in the classroom, or the seat you’ve marked to save while getting concessions at a

sporting event, we claim certain spaces as our own. There are three main

divisions for territory: primary, secondary, and public.Owen Hargie, Skilled

Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London:

Routledge, 2011), 70–71. Sometimes our claim to a space is official. These spaces

are known as our primary territories because they are marked or understood to

be exclusively ours and under our control. A person’s house, yard, room, desk,

side of the bed, or shelf in the medicine cabinet could be considered primary

territories.

Secondary territories don’t belong to us and aren’t exclusively under our control,

but they are associated with us, which may lead us to assume that the space will

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be open and available to us when we need it without us taking any further steps

to reserve it. This happens in classrooms regularly. Students often sit in the same

desk or at least same general area as they did on the first day of class. There may

be some small adjustments during the first couple of weeks, but by a month into

the semester, I don’t notice students moving much voluntarily. When someone

else takes a student’s regular desk, she or he is typically annoyed. I do classroom

observations for the graduate teaching assistants I supervise, which means I

come into the classroom toward the middle of the semester and take a seat in the

back to evaluate the class session. Although I don’t intend to take someone’s seat,

on more than one occasion, I’ve been met by the confused or even glaring eyes of

a student whose routine is suddenly interrupted when they see me sitting in

“their seat.”

Public territories are open to all people. People are allowed to mark public

territory and use it for a limited period of time, but space is often up for grabs,

which makes public space difficult to manage for some people and can lead to

conflict. To avoid this type of situation, people use a variety of objects that are

typically recognized by others as nonverbal cues that mark a place as temporarily

reserved—for example, jackets, bags, papers, or a drink. There is some ambiguity

in the use of markers, though. A half-empty cup of coffee may be seen as trash

and thrown away, which would be an annoying surprise to a person who left it to

mark his or her table while visiting the restroom. One scholar’s informal

observations revealed that a full drink sitting on a table could reserve a space in a

university cafeteria for more than an hour, but a cup only half full usually only

worked as a marker of territory for less than ten minutes. People have to decide

how much value they want their marker to have. Obviously, leaving a laptop on a

table indicates that the table is occupied, but it could also lead to the laptop

getting stolen. A pencil, on the other hand, could just be moved out of the way

and the space usurped.

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Chronemics

Chronemics refers to the study of how time affects communication. Time can be

classified into several different categories, including biological, personal,

physical, and cultural time.Peter A. Andersen,Nonverbal Communication: Forms

and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 65–66.Biological time

refers to the rhythms of living things. Humans follow a circadian rhythm,

meaning that we are on a daily cycle that influences when we eat, sleep, and

wake. When our natural rhythms are disturbed, by all-nighters, jet lag, or other

scheduling abnormalities, our physical and mental health and our

communication competence and personal relationships can suffer. Keep

biological time in mind as you communicate with others. Remember that early

morning conversations and speeches may require more preparation to get

yourself awake enough to communicate well and a more patient or energetic

delivery to accommodate others who may still be getting warmed up for their day.

Personal time refers to the ways in which individuals experience time. The way

we experience time varies based on our mood, our interest level, and other

factors. Think about how quickly time passes when you are interested in and

therefore engaged in something. I have taught fifty-minute classes that seemed to

drag on forever and three-hour classes that zipped by. Individuals also vary based

on whether or not they are future or past oriented. People with past-time

orientations may want to reminisce about the past, reunite with old friends, and

put considerable time into preserving memories and keepsakes in scrapbooks

and photo albums. People with future-time orientations may spend the same

amount of time making career and personal plans, writing out to-do lists, or

researching future vacations, potential retirement spots, or what book they’re

going to read next.

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Physical time refers to the fixed cycles of days, years, and seasons. Physical time,

especially seasons, can affect our mood and psychological states. Some people

experience seasonal affective disorder that leads them to experience emotional

distress and anxiety during the changes of seasons, primarily from warm and

bright to dark and cold (summer to fall and winter).

Cultural time refers to how a large group of people view time. Polychronic people

do not view time as a linear progression that needs to be divided into small units

and scheduled in advance. Polychronic people keep more flexible schedules and

may engage in several activities at once. Monochronic people tend to schedule

their time more rigidly and do one thing at a time. A polychronic or monochronic

orientation to time influences our social realities and how we interact with others.

Additionally, the way we use time depends in some ways on our status. For

example, doctors can make their patients wait for extended periods of time, and

executives and celebrities may run consistently behind schedule, making others

wait for them. Promptness and the amount of time that is socially acceptable for

lateness and waiting varies among individuals and contexts. Chronemics also

covers the amount of time we spend talking. We’ve already learned that

conversational turns and turn-taking patterns are influenced by social norms and

help our conversations progress. We all know how annoying it can be when a

person dominates a conversation or when we can’t get a person to contribute

anything.

Personal Presentation and Environment

Personal presentation involves two components: our physical characteristics and

the artifacts with which we adorn and surround ourselves. Physical

characteristics include body shape, height, weight, attractiveness, and other

physical features of our bodies. We do not have as much control over how these

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nonverbal cues are encoded as we do with many other aspects of nonverbal

communication. AsChapter 2 "Communication and Perception" noted, these

characteristics play a large role in initial impression formation even though we

know we “shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.” Although ideals of attractiveness

vary among cultures and individuals, research consistently indicates that people

who are deemed attractive based on physical characteristics have distinct

advantages in many aspects of life. This fact, along with media images that

project often unrealistic ideals of beauty, have contributed to booming health and

beauty, dieting, gym, and plastic surgery industries. While there have been some

controversial reality shows that seek to transform people’s physical

characteristics, like Extreme Makeover, The Swan, and The Biggest Loser, the

relative ease with which we can change the artifacts that send nonverbal cues

about us has led to many more style and space makeover shows.

Have you ever tried to consciously change your “look?” I can distinctly remember

two times in my life when I made pretty big changes in how I presented myself in

terms of clothing and accessories. In high school, at the height of the “thrift store”

craze, I started wearing clothes from the local thrift store daily. Of course, most of

them were older clothes, so I was basically going for a “retro” look, which I

thought really suited me at the time. Then in my junior year of college, as

graduation finally seemed on the horizon and I felt myself entering a new stage of

adulthood, I started wearing business-casual clothes to school every day,

embracing the “dress for the job you want” philosophy. In both cases, these

changes definitely impacted how others perceived me. Television programs

like What Not to Wear seek to show the power of wardrobe and personal style

changes in how people communicate with others.

Aside from clothes, jewelry, visible body art, hairstyles, and other political, social,

and cultural symbols send messages to others about who we are. In the United

States, body piercings and tattoos have been shifting from subcultural to

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mainstream over the past few decades. The physical location, size, and number of

tattoos and piercings play a large role in whether or not they are deemed

appropriate for professional contexts, and many people with tattoos and/or

piercings make conscious choices about when and where they display their body

art. Hair also sends messages whether it is on our heads or our bodies. Men with

short hair are generally judged to be more conservative than men with long hair,

but men with shaved heads may be seen as aggressive. Whether a person has a

part in their hair, a mohawk, faux-hawk, ponytail, curls, or bright pink hair also

sends nonverbal signals to others.

Jewelry can also send messages with varying degrees of direct meaning. A ring on

the “ring finger” of a person’s left hand typically indicates that they are married

or in an otherwise committed relationship. A thumb ring or a right-hand ring on

the “ring finger” doesn’t send such a direct message. People also adorn their

clothes, body, or belongings with religious or cultural symbols, like a cross to

indicate a person’s Christian faith or a rainbow flag to indicate that a person is

gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer, or an ally to one or more of those

groups. People now wear various types of rubber bracelets, which have become a

popular form of social cause marketing, to indicate that they identify with the

“Livestrong” movement or support breast cancer awareness and research.

Last, the environment in which we interact affects our verbal and nonverbal

communication. This is included because we can often manipulate the nonverbal

environment similar to how we would manipulate our gestures or tone of voice to

suit our communicative needs. The books that we display on our coffee table, the

magazines a doctor keeps in his or her waiting room, the placement of fresh

flowers in a foyer, or a piece of mint chocolate on a hotel bed pillow all send

particular messages and can easily be changed. The placement of objects and

furniture in a physical space can help create a formal, distant, friendly, or

intimate climate. In terms of formality, we can use nonverbal communication to

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convey dominance and status, which helps define and negotiate power and roles

within relationships. Fancy cars and expensive watches can serve as symbols that

distinguish a CEO from an entry-level employee. A room with soft lighting, a

small fountain that creates ambient sounds of water flowing, and a comfy chair

can help facilitate interactions between a therapist and a patient. In summary,

whether we know it or not, our physical characteristics and the artifacts that

surround us communicate much.

“Getting Plugged In”

Avatars

Avatars are computer-generated images that represent users in online

environments or are created to interact with users in online and offline

situations. Avatars can be created in the likeness of humans, animals, aliens, or

other nonhuman creatures.Katrin Allmendinger, “Social Presence in

Synchronous Virtual Learning Situations: The Role of Nonverbal Signals

Displayed by Avatars,”Educational Psychology Review 22, no. 1 (2010):

42. Avatars vary in terms of functionality and technical sophistication and can

include stationary pictures like buddy icons, cartoonish but humanlike

animations like a Mii character on the Wii, or very humanlike animations

designed to teach or assist people in virtual environments. More recently, 3-D

holographic avatars have been put to work helping travelers at airports in Paris

and New York.Steve Strunksy, “New Airport Service Rep Is Stiff and Phony, but

She’s Friendly,” NJ.COM, May 22, 2012, accessed June 28,

2012, http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2012/05/new_airport_service_rep_is

_sti.html; Tecca, “New York City Airports Install New, Expensive Holograms to

Help You Find Your Way,” Y! Tech: A Yahoo! News Blog, May 22, 2012, accessed

June 28, 2012,http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/technology-blog/york-city-airports-

install-expensive-holograms-help-way-024937526.html. Research has shown,

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though, that humanlike avatars influence people even when they are not

sophisticated in terms of functionality and adaptability.Amy L. Baylor, “The

Design of Motivational Agents and Avatars,” Educational Technology Research

and Development59, no. 2 (2011): 291–300. Avatars are especially motivating

and influential when they are similar to the observer or user but more closely

represent the person’s ideal self. Appearance has been noted as one of the most

important attributes of an avatar designed to influence or motivate.

Attractiveness, coolness (in terms of clothing and hairstyle), and age were shown

to be factors that increase or decrease the influence an avatar has over users.Amy

L. Baylor, “The Design of Motivational Agents and Avatars,” Educational

Technology Research and Development 59, no. 2 (2011): 291–300.

People also create their own avatars as self-representations in a variety of online

environments ranging from online role-playing games like World of

Warcraft and Second Life to some online learning management systems used by

colleges and universities. Research shows that the line between reality and virtual

reality can become blurry when it comes to avatar design and identification. This

can become even more pronounced when we consider that some users, especially

of online role-playing games, spend about twenty hours a week as their avatar.

Avatars do more than represent people in online worlds; they also affect their

behaviors offline. For example, one study found that people who watched an

avatar that looked like them exercising and losing weight in an online

environment exercised more and ate healthier in the real world.Jesse Fox and

Jeremy M. Bailenson, “Virtual Self-Modeling: The Effects of Vicarious

Reinforcement and Identification on Exercise Behaviors,” Media Psychology 12,

no. 1 (2009): 1–25. Seeing an older version of them online led participants to

form a more concrete social and psychological connection with their future

selves, which led them to invest more money in a retirement account. People’s

actions online also mirror the expectations for certain physical characteristics,

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even when the user doesn’t exhibit those characteristics and didn’t get to choose

them for his or her avatar. For example, experimental research showed that

people using more attractive avatars were more extroverted and friendly than

those with less attractive avatars, which is also a nonverbal communication

pattern that exists among real people. In summary, people have the ability to self-

select physical characteristics and personal presentation for their avatars in a way

that they can’t in their real life. People come to see their avatars as part of

themselves, which opens the possibility for avatars to affect users’ online and

offline communication.Changsoo Kim, Sang-Gun Lee, and Minchoel Kang, “I

Became an Attractive Person in the Virtual World: Users’ Identification with

Virtual Communities and Avatars,” Computers in Human Behavior, 28, no. 5

(2012): 1663–69

1. Describe an avatar that you have created for yourself. What led you to

construct the avatar the way you did, and how do you think your choices

reflect your typical nonverbal self-presentation? If you haven’t ever

constructed an avatar, what would you make your avatar look like and

why?

2. In 2009, a man in Japan became the first human to marry an avatar (that

we know of). Although he claims that his avatar is better than any human

girlfriend, he has been criticized as being out of touch with reality. You can

read more about this human-avatar union through the following

link: http://articles.cnn.com/2009-12-

16/world/japan.virtual.wedding_1_virtual-world-sal-

marry?_s=PM:WORLD. Do you think the boundaries between human

reality and avatar fantasy will continue to fade as we become a more

technologically fused world? How do you feel about interacting more with

avatars in customer service situations like the airport avatar mentioned

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above? What do you think about having avatars as mentors, role models,

or teachers?

K E Y T A K E A W A Y S

• Kinesics refers to body movements and posture and includes the following

components:

o Gestures are arm and hand movements and include adaptors like clicking

a pen or scratching your face, emblems like a thumbs-up to say “OK,” and

illustrators like bouncing your hand along with the rhythm of your

speaking.

o Head movements and posture include the orientation of movements of

our head and the orientation and positioning of our body and the various

meanings they send. Head movements such as nodding can indicate

agreement, disagreement, and interest, among other things. Posture can

indicate assertiveness, defensiveness, interest, readiness, or intimidation,

among other things.

o Eye contact is studied under the category of oculesics and specifically

refers to eye contact with another person’s face, head, and eyes and the

patterns of looking away and back at the other person during interaction.

Eye contact provides turn-taking signals, signals when we are engaged in

cognitive activity, and helps establish rapport and connection, among

other things.

o Facial expressions refer to the use of the forehead, brow, and facial

muscles around the nose and mouth to convey meaning. Facial

expressions can convey happiness, sadness, fear, anger, and other

emotions.

• Haptics refers to touch behaviors that convey meaning during interactions. Touch

operates at many levels, including functional-professional, social-polite,

friendship-warmth, and love-intimacy.

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• Vocalics refers to the vocalized but not verbal aspects of nonverbal

communication, including our speaking rate, pitch, volume, tone of voice, and

vocal quality. These qualities, also known as paralanguage, reinforce the meaning

of verbal communication, allow us to emphasize particular parts of a message, or

can contradict verbal messages.

• Proxemics refers to the use of space and distance within communication. US

Americans, in general, have four zones that constitute our personal space: the

public zone (12 or more feet from our body), social zone (4–12 feet from our

body), the personal zone (1.5–4 feet from our body), and the intimate zone (from

body contact to 1.5 feet away). Proxemics also studies territoriality, or how

people take up and defend personal space.

• Chronemics refers the study of how time affects communication and includes

how different time cycles affect our communication, including the differences

between people who are past or future oriented and cultural perspectives on

time as fixed and measured (monochronic) or fluid and adaptable (polychronic).

• Personal presentation and environment refers to how the objects we adorn

ourselves and our surroundings with, referred to as artifacts, provide nonverbal

cues that others make meaning from and how our physical environment—for

example, the layout of a room and seating positions and arrangements—

influences communication.

E X E R C I S E S

1. Provide some examples of how eye contact plays a role in your communication

throughout the day.

2. One of the key functions of vocalics is to add emphasis to our verbal messages to

influence the meaning. Provide a meaning for each of the following statements

based on which word is emphasized: “She is my friend.” “She is my friend.” “She

is my friend.”

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3. Getting integrated: Many people do not think of time as an important part of our

nonverbal communication. Provide an example of how chronemics sends

nonverbal messages in academic settings, professional settings, and personal

settings.

4.3 Nonverbal Communication Competence

L E A R N I N G O B J E C T I V E S

1. Identify and employ strategies for improving competence with sending nonverbal

messages.

2. Identify and employ strategies for improving competence with interpreting

nonverbal messages.

As we age, we internalize social and cultural norms related to sending (encoding)

and interpreting (decoding) nonverbal communication. In terms of sending, the

tendency of children to send unmonitored nonverbal signals reduces as we get

older and begin to monitor and perhaps censor or mask them.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 125. Likewise, as we become more experienced

communicators we tend to think that we become better at interpreting nonverbal

messages. In this section we will discuss some strategies for effectively encoding

and decoding nonverbal messages. As we’ve already learned, we receive little, if

any, official instruction in nonverbal communication, but you can think of this

chapter as a training manual to help improve your own nonverbal

communication competence. As with all aspects of communication, improving

your nonverbal communication takes commitment and continued effort.

However, research shows that education and training in nonverbal

communication can lead to quick gains in knowledge and skill.Ronald E. Riggio,

“Social Interaction Skills and Nonverbal Behavior,” inApplications of Nonverbal

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Behavior Theories and Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ:

Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 23. Additionally, once the initial effort is put into

improving your nonverbal encoding and decoding skills and those new skills are

put into practice, people are encouraged by the positive reactions from others.

Remember that people enjoy interacting with others who are skilled at nonverbal

encoding and decoding, which will be evident in their reactions, providing further

motivation and encouragement to hone your skills.

Guidelines for Sending Nonverbal Messages

As is stressed in Chapter 2 "Communication and Perception", first impressions

matter. Nonverbal cues account for much of the content from which we form

initial impressions, so it’s important to know that people make judgments about

our identities and skills after only brief exposure. Our competence regarding and

awareness of nonverbal communication can help determine how an interaction

will proceed and, in fact, whether it will take place at all. People who are skilled at

encoding nonverbal messages are more favorably evaluated after initial

encounters. This is likely due to the fact that people who are more nonverbally

expressive are also more attention getting and engaging and make people feel

more welcome and warm due to increased immediacy behaviors, all of which

enhance perceptions of charisma.

Understand That Nonverbal Communication Is Multichannel

Be aware of the multichannel nature of nonverbal communication. We rarely

send a nonverbal message in isolation. For example, a posture may be combined

with a touch or eye behavior to create what is called a nonverbal cluster.Allan

Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body Language (New York, NY:

Bantam, 2004), 21. Nonverbal congruencerefers to consistency among different

nonverbal expressions within a cluster. Congruent nonverbal communication is

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more credible and effective than ambiguous or conflicting nonverbal cues. Even

though you may intend for your nonverbal messages to be congruent, they could

still be decoded in a way that doesn’t match up with your intent, especially since

nonverbal expressions vary in terms of their degree of conscious encoding. In this

sense, the multichannel nature of nonverbal communication creates the potential

of both increased credibility and increased ambiguity.

When we become more aware of the messages we are sending, we can monitor

for nonverbal signals that are incongruent with other messages or may be

perceived as such. If a student is talking to his professor about his performance in

the class and concerns about his grade, the professor may lean forward and nod,

encoding a combination of a body orientation and a head movement that conveys

attention. If the professor, however, regularly breaks off eye contact and looks

anxiously at her office door, then she is sending a message that could be

perceived as disinterest, which is incongruent with the overall message of care

and concern she probably wants to encode. Increasing our awareness of the

multiple channels through which we send nonverbal cues can help us make our

signals more congruent in the moment.

Understand That Nonverbal Communication Affects Our Interactions

Nonverbal communication affects our own and others’ behaviors and

communication. Changing our nonverbal signals can affect our thoughts and

emotions. Knowing this allows us to have more control over the trajectory of our

communication, possibly allowing us to intervene in a negative cycle. For

example, if you are waiting in line to get your driver’s license renewed and the

agents in front of you are moving slower than you’d like and the man in front of

you doesn’t have his materials organized and is asking unnecessary questions,

you might start to exhibit nonverbal clusters that signal frustration. You might

cross your arms, a closing-off gesture, and combine that with wrapping your

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fingers tightly around one bicep and occasionally squeezing, which is a self-touch

adaptor that results from anxiety and stress. The longer you stand like that, the

more frustrated and defensive you will become, because that nonverbal cluster

reinforces and heightens your feelings. Increased awareness about these cycles

can help you make conscious moves to change your nonverbal communication

and, subsequently, your cognitive and emotional states.Matthew McKay, Martha

Davis, and Patrick Fanning, Messages: Communication Skills Book, 2nd ed.

(Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 1995), 54.

As your nonverbal encoding competence increases, you can strategically

manipulate your behaviors. During my years as a restaurant server I got pretty

good at knowing what tables to engage with and “schmooze” a little more to get a

better tip. Restaurant servers, bartenders, car salespeople, realtors, exotic

dancers, and many others who work in a service or sales capacity know that part

of “sealing the deal” is making people feel liked, valued, and important. The

strategic use of nonverbal communication to convey these messages is largely

accepted and expected in our society, and as customers or patrons, we often play

along because it feels good in the moment to think that the other person actually

cares about us. Using nonverbals that are intentionally deceptive and misleading

can have negative consequences and cross the line into unethical communication.

As you get better at monitoring and controlling your nonverbal behaviors and

understanding how nonverbal cues affect our interaction, you may show more

competence in multiple types of communication. For example, people who are

more skilled at monitoring and controlling nonverbal displays of emotion report

that they are more comfortable public speakers.Ronald E. Riggio, “Social

Interaction Skills and Nonverbal Behavior,” in Applications of Nonverbal

Behavior Theories and Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ:

Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 12. Since speakers become more nervous when they

think that audience members are able to detect their nervousness based on

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outwardly visible, mostly nonverbal cues, it is logical that confidence in one’s

ability to control those outwardly visible cues would result in a lessening of that

common fear.

Understand How Nonverbal Communication Creates Rapport

Humans have evolved an innate urge to mirror each other’s nonverbal behavior,

and although we aren’t often aware of it, this urge influences our behavior

daily.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body

Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 251. Think, for example, about how

people “fall into formation” when waiting in a line. Our nonverbal

communication works to create an unspoken and subconscious cooperation, as

people move and behave in similar ways. When one person leans to the left the

next person in line may also lean to the left, and this shift in posture may

continue all the way down the line to the end, until someone else makes another

movement and the whole line shifts again. This phenomenon is known

as mirroring, which refers to the often subconscious practice of using nonverbal

cues in a way that match those of others around us. Mirroring sends implicit

messages to others that say, “Look! I’m just like you.” Mirroring evolved as an

important social function in that it allowed early humans to more easily fit in

with larger groups. Logically, early humans who were more successful at

mirroring were more likely to secure food, shelter, and security and therefore

passed that genetic disposition on down the line to us.

Last summer, during a backyard game of “corn hole” with my family, my mom

and sister were standing at the other board and kept whispering to each other

and laughing at my dad and me. Corn hole, which is also called “bags,” involves

throwing a cloth sack filled with corn toward another team’s board with the goal

of getting it in the hole or on the board to score points. They later told us that

they were amazed at how we stood, threw our bags, and shifted position between

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rounds in unison. Although my dad and I didn’t realize we were doing it, our

subconscious mirroring was obviously noticeable to others. Mirroring is largely

innate and subconscious, but we can more consciously use it and a variety of

other nonverbal signals, like the immediacy behaviors we discussed earlier, to

help create social bonds and mutual liking.

Understand How Nonverbal Communication Regulates Conversations

The ability to encode appropriate turn-taking signals can help ensure that we can

hold the floor when needed in a conversation or work our way into a conversation

smoothly, without inappropriately interrupting someone or otherwise being seen

as rude. People with nonverbal encoding competence are typically more “in

control” of conversations. This regulating function can be useful in initial

encounters when we are trying to learn more about another person and in

situations where status differentials are present or compliance gaining or

dominance are goals. Although close friends, family, and relational partners can

sometimes be an exception, interrupting is generally considered rude and should

be avoided. Even though verbal communication is most often used to interrupt

another person, interruptions are still studied as a part of chronemics because it

interferes with another person’s talk time. Instead of interrupting, you can use

nonverbal signals like leaning in, increasing your eye contact, or using a brief

gesture like subtly raising one hand or the index finger to signal to another

person that you’d like to soon take the floor.

Understand How Nonverbal Communication Relates to Listening

Part of being a good listener involves nonverbal-encoding competence, as

nonverbal feedback in the form of head nods, eye contact, and posture can signal

that a listener is paying attention and the speaker’s message is received and

understood. Active listening, for example, combines good cognitive listening

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practices with outwardly visible cues that signal to others that we are listening.

We will learn more about active listening in Chapter 5 "Listening", but we all

know from experience which nonverbal signals convey attentiveness and which

convey a lack of attentiveness. Listeners are expected to make more eye contact

with the speaker than the speaker makes with them, so it’s important to “listen

with your eyes” by maintaining eye contact, which signals attentiveness. Listeners

should also avoid distracting movements in the form of self, other, and object

adaptors. Being a higher self-monitor can help you catch nonverbal signals that

might signal that you aren’t listening, at which point you could consciously switch

to more active listening signals.

Understand How Nonverbal Communication Relates to Impression Management

The nonverbal messages we encode also help us express our identities and play

into impression management, which as we learned in Chapter 1 "Introduction to

Communication Studies" is a key part of communicating to achieve identity goals.

Being able to control nonverbal expressions and competently encode them allows

us to better manage our persona and project a desired self to others—for

example, a self that is perceived as competent, socially attractive, and engaging.

Being nonverbally expressive during initial interactions usually leads to more

favorable impressions. So smiling, keeping an attentive posture, and offering a

solid handshake help communicate confidence and enthusiasm that can be useful

on a first date, during a job interview, when visiting family for the holidays, or

when running into an acquaintance at the grocery store. Nonverbal

communication can also impact the impressions you make as a student. Research

has also found that students who are more nonverbally expressive are liked more

by their teachers and are more likely to have their requests met by their

teachers.Timothy P. Mottet, Steven A. Beebe, Paul C. Raffeld, and Michelle L.

Paulsel, “The Effects of Student Verbal and Nonverbal Responsiveness on

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Teachers’ Liking of Students and Willingness to Comply with Student

Requests,”Communication Quarterly 52, no. 1 (2004): 27–38.

Increase Competence in Specific Channels of Nonverbal Communication

While it is important to recognize that we send nonverbal signals through

multiple channels simultaneously, we can also increase our nonverbal

communication competence by becoming more aware of how it operates in

specific channels. Although no one can truly offer you a rulebook on how to

effectively send every type of nonverbal signal, there are several nonverbal

guidebooks that are written from more anecdotal and less academic perspectives.

While these books vary tremendously in terms of their credibility and quality,

some, like Allan Pease and Barbara Pease’s The Definitive Book of Body

Language, are informative and interesting to read.

Kinesics

The following guidelines may help you more effectively encode nonverbal

messages sent using your hands, arms, body, and face.

Gestures

• Illustrators make our verbal communication more engaging. I recommend

that people doing phone interviews or speaking on the radio make an

effort to gesture as they speak, even though people can’t see the gestures,

because it will make their words sound more engaging.

• Remember that adaptors can hurt your credibility in more formal or

serious interactions. Figure out what your common adaptors are and

monitor them so you can avoid creating unfavorable impressions.

• Gestures send messages about your emotional state. Since many gestures

are spontaneous or subconscious, it is important to raise your awareness

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of them and monitor them. Be aware that clenched hands may signal

aggression or anger, nail biting or fidgeting may signal nervousness, and

finger tapping may signal boredom.

Eye Contact

• Eye contact is useful for initiating and regulating conversations. To make

sure someone is available for interaction and to avoid being perceived as

rude, it is usually a good idea to “catch their eye” before you start talking to

them.

• Avoiding eye contact or shifting your eye contact from place to place can

lead others to think you are being deceptive or inattentive. Minimize

distractions by moving a clock, closing a door, or closing window blinds to

help minimize distractions that may lure your eye contact away.

• Although avoiding eye contact can be perceived as sign of disinterest, low

confidence, or negative emotionality, eye contact avoidance can be used

positively as a face-saving strategy. The notion ofcivil inattention refers to

a social norm that leads us to avoid making eye contact with people in

situations that deviate from expected social norms, such as witnessing

someone fall or being in close proximity to a stranger expressing negative

emotions (like crying). We also use civil inattention when we avoid making

eye contact with others in crowded spaces.Erving Goffman, Relations in

Public: Microstudies of the Public Order (New Brunswick, NJ:

Transaction Publishers, 2010), 322–31.

Facial Expressions

• You can use facial expressions to manage your expressions of emotions to

intensify what you’re feeling, to diminish what you’re feeling, to cover up

what you’re feeling, to express a different emotion than you’re feeling, or

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to simulate an emotion that you’re not feeling.Sandra Metts and Sally

Planlap, “Emotional Communication,” in Handbook of Interpersonal

Communication, 3rd ed., eds. Mark L. Knapp and Kerry J. Daly (Thousand

Oaks, CA: Sage, 2002): 339–73.

• Be aware of the power of emotional contagion, or the spread of emotion

from one person to another. Since facial expressions are key for emotional

communication, you may be able to strategically use your facial

expressions to cheer someone up, lighten a mood, or create a more serious

and somber tone.

• Smiles are especially powerful as an immediacy behavior and a rapport-

building tool. Smiles can also help to disarm a potentially hostile person or

deescalate conflict. When I have a problem or complain in a customer

service situation, I always make sure to smile at the clerk, manager, or

other person before I begin talking to help minimize my own annoyance

and set a more positive tone for the interaction.

Haptics

The following guidelines may help you more effectively encode nonverbal signals

using touch:

• Remember that culture, status, gender, age, and setting influence how we

send and interpret touch messages.

• In professional and social settings, it is generally OK to touch others on the

arm or shoulder. Although we touch others on the arm or shoulder with

our hand, it is often too intimate to touch your hand to another person’s

hand in a professional or social/casual setting.

These are types of touch to avoid:Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication:

Forms and Functions(Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 49.

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• Avoid touching strangers unless being introduced or offering assistance.

• Avoid hurtful touches and apologize if they occur, even if accidentally.

• Avoid startling/surprising another person with your touch.

• Avoid interrupting touches such as hugging someone while they are

talking to someone else.

• Avoid moving people out of the way with only touch—pair your touch with

a verbal message like “excuse me.”

• Avoid overly aggressive touch, especially when disguised as playful touch

(e.g., horseplay taken too far).

• Avoid combining touch with negative criticism; a hand on the shoulder

during a critical statement can increase a person’s defensiveness and seem

condescending or aggressive.

Vocalics

The following guidelines may help you more effectively encode nonverbal signals

using paralanguage.

• Verbal fillers are often used subconsciously and can negatively affect your

credibility and reduce the clarity of your message when speaking in more

formal situations. In fact, verbal fluency is one of the strongest predictors

of persuasiveness.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction:

Research, Theory, and Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011),

81. Becoming a higher self-monitor can help you notice your use of verbal

fillers and begin to eliminate them. Beginner speakers can often reduce

their use of verbal fillers noticeably over just a short period of time.

• Vocal variety increases listener and speaker engagement, understanding,

information recall, and motivation. So having a more expressive voice that

varies appropriately in terms of rate, pitch, and volume can help you

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achieve communication goals related to maintaining attention, effectively

conveying information, and getting others to act in a particular way.

Proxemics

The following may help you more effectively encode nonverbal signals related to

interpersonal distances.

• When breaches of personal space occur, it is a social norm to make

nonverbal adjustments such as lowering our level of immediacy, changing

our body orientations, and using objects to separate ourselves from others.

To reduce immediacy, we engage in civil inattention and reduce the

amount of eye contact we make with others. We also shift the front of our

body away from others since it has most of our sensory inputs and also

allows access to body parts that are considered vulnerable, such as the

stomach, face, and genitals.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield,

1999), 45. When we can’t shift our bodies, we often use coats, bags, books,

or our hands to physically separate or block off the front of our bodies

from others.

• Although pets and children are often granted more leeway to breach other

people’s space, since they are still learning social norms and rules, as a pet

owner, parent, or temporary caretaker, be aware of this possibility and try

to prevent such breaches or correct them when they occur.

Chronemics

The following guideline may help you more effectively encode nonverbal signals

related to time.

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• In terms of talk time and turn taking, research shows that people who take

a little longer with their turn, holding the floor slightly longer than normal,

are actually seen as more credible than people who talk too much or too

little.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 64.

• Our lateness or promptness can send messages about our professionalism,

dependability, or other personality traits. Formal time usually applies to

professional situations in which we are expected to be on time or even a

few minutes early. You generally wouldn’t want to be late for work, a job

interview, a medical appointment, and so on. Informal time applies to

casual and interpersonal situations in which there is much more variation

in terms of expectations for promptness. For example, when I lived in a

large city, people often arrived to dinner parties or other social gatherings

about thirty minutes after the announced time, given the possibility of

interference by heavy traffic or people’s hectic schedules. Now that I live in

a smaller town in the Midwest, I’ve learned that people are expected to

arrive at or close to the announced time. For most social meetings with

one other person or a small group, you can be five minutes late without

having to offer much of an apology or explanation. For larger social

gatherings you can usually be fifteen minutes late as long as your late

arrival doesn’t interfere with the host’s plans or preparations.

• Quality time is an important part of interpersonal relationships, and

sometimes time has to be budgeted so that it can be saved and spent with

certain people or on certain occasions—like date nights for couples or

family time for parents and children or other relatives.

Personal Presentation and Environment

The following guidelines may help you more effectively encode nonverbal signals

related to personal presentation and environment.

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• Recognize that personal presentation carries much weight in terms of

initial impressions, so meeting the expectations and social norms for

dress, grooming, and other artifactual communication is especially

important for impression management.

• Recognize that some environments facilitate communication and some do

not. A traditional front-facing business or educational setup is designed

for one person to communicate with a larger audience. People in the

audience cannot as easily interact with each other because they can’t see

each other face-to-face without turning. A horseshoe or circular

arrangement allows everyone to make eye contact and facilitates

interaction. Even close proximity doesn’t necessarily facilitate interaction.

For example, a comfortable sofa may bring four people together, but eye

contact among all four is nearly impossible if they’re all facing the same

direction.

• Where you choose to sit can also impact perceived characteristics and

leadership decisions. People who sit at the head or center of a table are

often chosen to be leaders by others because of their nonverbal

accessibility—a decision which may have more to do with where the person

chose to sit than the person’s perceived or actual leadership abilities.

Research has found that juries often select their foreperson based on

where he or she happens to sit.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield,

1999), 57–58. Keep this in mind the next time you take your seat at a

meeting.

Guidelines for Interpreting Nonverbal Messages

We learn to decode or interpret nonverbal messages through practice and by

internalizing social norms. Following the suggestions to become a better encoder

of nonverbal communication will lead to better decoding competence through

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increased awareness. Since nonverbal communication is more ambiguous than

verbal communication, we have to learn to interpret these cues as clusters within

contexts. My favorite way to increase my knowledge about nonverbal

communication is to engage in people watching. Just by consciously taking in the

variety of nonverbal signals around us, we can build our awareness and

occasionally be entertained. Skilled decoders of nonverbal messages are said to

have nonverbal sensitivity, which, very similarly to skilled encoders, leads them

to have larger social networks, be more popular, and exhibit less social

anxiety.Ronald E. Riggio, “Social Interaction Skills and Nonverbal Behavior,”

in Applications of Nonverbal Behavior Theories and Research, ed. Robert S.

Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 15.

There Is No Nonverbal Dictionary

The first guideline for decoding nonverbal communication is to realize that there

is no nonverbal dictionary. Some nonverbal scholars and many nonverbal skill

trainers have tried to catalog nonverbal communication like we do verbal

communication to create dictionary-like guides that people can use to interpret

nonverbal signals. Although those guides may contain many valid “rules” of

nonverbal communication, those rules are always relative to the individual,

social, and cultural contexts in which an interaction takes place. In short, you

can’t read people’s nonverbal communication like a book, and there are no A-to-

Z guides that capture the complexity of nonverbal communication.Peter J.

DePaulo, “Applications of Nonverbal Behavior Research in Marketing and

Management,” Applications of Nonverbal Behavior Theories and Research, ed.

Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 64. Rather than

using a list of specific rules, I suggest people develop more general tools that will

be useful in and adaptable to a variety of contexts.

Recognize That Certain Nonverbal Signals Are Related

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The second guideline for decoding nonverbal signals is to recognize that certain

nonverbal signals are related. Nonverbal rulebooks aren’t effective because they

typically view a nonverbal signal in isolation, similar to how dictionaries

separately list denotative definitions of words. To get a more nuanced

understanding of the meaning behind nonverbal cues, we can look at them as

progressive or layered. For example, people engaging in negative critical

evaluation of a speaker may cross their legs, cross one arm over their stomach,

and put the other arm up so the index finger is resting close to the eye while the

chin rests on the thumb.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of

Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 22. A person wouldn’t likely

perform all those signals simultaneously. Instead, he or she would likely start

with one and then layer more cues on as the feelings intensified. If we notice that

a person is starting to build related signals like the ones above onto one another,

we might be able to intervene in the negative reaction that is building. Of course,

as nonverbal cues are layered on, they may contradict other signals, in which case

we can turn to context clues to aid our interpretation.

Read Nonverbal Cues in Context

We will learn more specifics about nonverbal communication in relational,

professional, and cultural contexts in Section 4.1 "Principles and Functions of

Nonverbal Communication", but we can also gain insight into how to interpret

nonverbal cues through personal contexts. People have idiosyncratic nonverbal

behaviors, which create an individual context that varies with each person. Even

though we generally fit into certain social and cultural patterns, some people

deviate from those norms. For example, some cultures tend toward less touching

and greater interpersonal distances during interactions. The United States falls

into this general category, but there are people who were socialized into these

norms who as individuals deviate from them and touch more and stand closer to

others while conversing. As the idiosyncratic communicator inches toward his or

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her conversational partner, the partner may inch back to reestablish the

interpersonal distance norm. Such deviations may lead people to misinterpret

sexual or romantic interest or feel uncomfortable. While these actions could

indicate such interest, they could also be idiosyncratic. As this example shows,

these individual differences can increase the ambiguity of nonverbal

communication, but when observed over a period of time, they can actually help

us generate meaning. Try to compare observed nonverbal cues to a person’s

typical or baseline nonverbal behavior to help avoid misinterpretation. In some

instances it is impossible to know what sorts of individual nonverbal behaviors or

idiosyncrasies people have because there isn’t a relational history. In such cases,

we have to turn to our knowledge about specific types of nonverbal

communication or draw from more general contextual knowledge.

Interpreting Cues within Specific Channels

When nonverbal cues are ambiguous or contextual clues aren’t useful in

interpreting nonverbal clusters, we may have to look at nonverbal behaviors

within specific channels. Keep in mind that the following tips aren’t hard and fast

rules and are usually more meaningful when adapted according to a specific

person or context. In addition, many of the suggestions in the section on

encoding competence can be adapted usefully to decoding.

Kinesics

GesturesAllan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body

Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004).

• While it doesn’t always mean a person is being honest, displaying palms is

largely unconsciously encoded and decoded as a sign of openness and

truthfulness. Conversely, crossing your arms in front of your chest is

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decoded almost everywhere as a negative gesture that conveys

defensiveness.

• We typically decode people putting their hands in their pocket as a gesture

that indicates shyness or discomfort. Men often subconsciously put their

hands in their pockets when they don’t want to participate in a

conversation. But displaying the thumb or thumbs while the rest of the

hand is in the pocket is a signal of a dominant or authoritative attitude.

• Nervous communicators may have distracting mannerisms in the form of

adaptors that you will likely need to tune out in order to focus more on

other verbal and nonverbal cues.

Head Movements and Posture

• The head leaning over and being supported by a hand can typically be

decoded as a sign of boredom, the thumb supporting the chin and the

index finger touching the head close to the temple or eye as a sign of

negative evaluative thoughts, and the chin stroke as a sign that a person is

going through a decision-making process.Allan Pease and Barbara

Pease, The Definitive Book of Body Language(New York, NY: Bantam,

2004), 155–59.

• In terms of seated posture, leaning back is usually decoded as a sign of

informality and indifference, straddling a chair as a sign of dominance

(but also some insecurity because the person is protecting the vulnerable

front part of his or her body), and leaning forward as a signal of interest

and attentiveness.

Eye Contact

• When someone is avoiding eye contact, don’t immediately assume they are

not listening or are hiding something, especially if you are conveying

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complex or surprising information. Since looking away also signals

cognitive activity, they may be processing information, and you may need

to pause and ask if they need a second to think or if they need you to

repeat or explain anything more.

• A “sideways glance,” which entails keeping the head and face pointed

straight ahead while focusing the eyes to the left or right, has multiple

contradictory meanings ranging from interest, to uncertainty, to hostility.

When the sideways glance is paired with a slightly raised eyebrow or smile,

it is sign of interest. When combined with a furrowed brow it generally

conveys uncertainty. But add a frown to that mix and it can signal

hostility.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body

Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 179.

Facial Expressions

• Be aware of discrepancies between facial expressions and other nonverbal

gestures and verbal communication. Since facial expressions are often

subconscious, they may be an indicator of incongruency within a speaker’s

message, and you may need to follow up with questions or consider

contextual clues to increase your understanding.

Haptics

• Consider the status and power dynamics involved in a touch. In general,

people who have or feel they have more social power in a situation

typically engage in more touching behaviors with those with less social

power. So you may decode a touch from a supervisor differently from the

touch of an acquaintance.

Vocalics

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• People often decode personality traits from a person’s vocal quality. In

general, a person’s vocal signature is a result of the physiology of his or her

neck, head, and mouth. Therefore a nasal voice or a deep voice may not

have any relevant meaning within an interaction. Try not to focus on

something you find unpleasant or pleasant about someone’s voice; focus

on the content rather than the vocal quality.

Proxemics

• The size of a person’s “territory” often speaks to that person’s status. At

universities, deans may have suites, department chairs may have large

offices with multiple sitting areas, lower-ranked professors may have

“cozier” offices stuffed with books and file cabinets, and adjunct

instructors may have a shared office or desk or no office space at all.

• Since infringements on others’ territory can arouse angry reactions and

even lead to violence (think of the countless stories of neighbors fighting

over a fence or tree), be sensitive to territorial markers. In secondary and

public territories, look for informal markers such as drinks, books, or

jackets and be respectful of them when possible.

Personal Presentation and Environment

• Be aware of the physical attractiveness bias, which leads people to

sometimes mistakenly equate attractiveness with goodness.Owen

Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and

Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 75. A person’s attractive or

unattractive physical presentation can lead to irrelevant decoding that is

distracting from other more meaningful nonverbal cues.

Detecting Deception

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Although people rely on nonverbal communication more than verbal to

determine whether or not a person is being deceptive, there is no set profile of

deceptive behaviors that you can use to create your own nonverbally based lie

detector. Research finds that people generally perceive themselves as good

detectors of deception, but when tested people only accurately detect deception at

levels a little higher than what we would by random chance. Given that deception

is so widespread and common, it is estimated that we actually only detect about

half the lies that we are told, meaning we all operate on false information without

even being aware of it. Although this may be disappointing to those of you

reading who like to think of yourselves as human lie detectors, there are some

forces working against our deception detecting abilities. One such force is

the truth bias, which leads us to believe that a person is telling the truth,

especially if we know and like that person. Conversely, people who have

interpersonal trust issues and people in occupations like law enforcement may

also have a lie bias, meaning they assume people are lying to them more often

than not.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 293.

It is believed that deceptive nonverbal behaviors result from nonverbal leakage,

which refers to nonverbal behaviors that occur as we try to control the cognitive

and physical changes that happen during states of cognitive and physical

arousal.Owen Hargie, Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and

Practice, 5th ed. (London: Routledge, 2011), 52. Anxiety is a form of arousal that

leads to bodily reactions like those we experience when we perceive danger or

become excited for some other reason. Some of these reactions are visible, such

as increased movements, and some are audible, such as changes in voice pitch,

volume, or rate. Other reactions, such as changes in the electrical conductivity of

the skin, increased breathing, and increased heart rate, are not always detectable.

Polygraph machines, or lie detectors, work on the principle that the presence of

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signs of arousal is a reliable indicator of deception in situations where other

factors that would also evoke such signals are absent.

So the nonverbal behaviors that we associate with deception don’t actually stem

from the deception but the attempts to control the leakage that results from the

cognitive and physiological changes. These signals appear and increase because

we are conflicted about the act of deception, since we are conditioned to believe

that being honest is better than lying, we are afraid of getting caught and

punished, and we are motivated to succeed with the act of deception—in essence,

to get away with it. Leakage also occurs because of the increased cognitive

demands associated with deception. Our cognitive activity increases when we

have to decide whether to engage in deception or not, which often involves some

internal debate. If we decide to engage in deception, we then have to compose a

fabrication or execute some other manipulation strategy that we think is

believable. To make things more complicated, we usually tailor our manipulation

strategy to the person to whom we are speaking. In short, lying isn’t easy, as it

requires us to go against social norms and deviate from our comfortable and

familiar communication scripts that we rely on for so much of our interaction. Of

course, skilled and experienced deceivers develop new scripts that can also

become familiar and comfortable and allow them to engage in deception without

arousing as much anxiety or triggering the physical reactions to it.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 288.

There are certain nonverbal cues that have been associated with deception, but

the problem is that these cues are also associated with other behaviors, which

could lead you to assume someone is being deceptive when they are actually

nervous, guilty, or excited. In general, people who are more expressive are better

deceivers and people who are typically anxious are not good liars. Also, people

who are better self-monitors are better deceivers, because they are aware of

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verbal and nonverbal signals that may “give them away” and may be better able

to control or account for them. Research also shows that people get better at lying

as they get older, because they learn more about the intricacies of communication

signals and they also get more time to practice.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

281. Studies have found that actors, politicians, lawyers, and salespeople are also

better liars, because they are generally higher self-monitors and have learned

how to suppress internal feelings and monitor their external behaviors.

“Getting Competent”

Deception and Communication Competence

The research on deception and nonverbal communication indicates that

heightened arousal and increased cognitive demands contribute to the presence

of nonverbal behaviors that can be associated with deception. Remember,

however, that these nonverbal behaviors are not solely related to deception and

also manifest as a result of other emotional or cognitive states. Additionally,

when people are falsely accused of deception, the signs that they exhibit as a

result of the stress of being falsely accused are very similar to the signals

exhibited by people who are actually engaging in deception.

There are common misconceptions about what behaviors are associated with

deception. Behaviors mistakenly linked to deception include longer response

times, slower speech rates, decreased eye contact, increased body movements,

excessive swallowing, and less smiling. None of these have consistently been

associated with deception.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms

and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 296. As we’ve learned,

people also tend to give more weight to nonverbal than verbal cues when

evaluating the truthfulness of a person or her or his message. This predisposition

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can lead us to focus on nonverbal cues while overlooking verbal signals of

deception. A large study found that people were better able to detect deception by

sound alone than they were when exposed to both auditory and visual cues.Peter

A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 297. Aside from nonverbal cues, also listen for

inconsistencies in or contradictions between statements, which can also be used

to tell when others are being deceptive. The following are some nonverbal signals

that have been associated with deception in research studies, but be cautious

about viewing these as absolutes since individual and contextual differences

should also be considered.

Gestures. One of the most powerful associations between nonverbal behaviors

and deception is the presence of adaptors. Self-touches like wringing hands and

object-adaptors like playing with a pencil or messing with clothing have been

shown to correlate to deception. Some highly experienced deceivers, however,

can control the presence of adaptors.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

284.

Eye contact. Deceivers tend to use more eye contact when lying to friends,

perhaps to try to increase feelings of immediacy or warmth, and less eye contact

when lying to strangers. A review of many studies of deception indicates that

increased eye blinking is associated with deception, probably because of

heightened arousal and cognitive activity.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal

Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999),

282–83.

Facial expressions. People can intentionally use facial expressions to try to

deceive, and there are five primary ways that this may occur. People may show

feelings that they do not actually have, show a higher intensity of feelings than

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they actually have, try to show no feelings, try to show less feeling than they

actually have, or mask one feeling with another.

Vocalics. One of the most common nonverbal signs of deception is speech

errors. As you’ll recall, verbal fillers and other speech disfluencies are studied as

part of vocalics; examples include false starts, stutters, and fillers. Studies also

show that an increase in verbal pitch is associated with deception and is likely

caused by heightened arousal and tension.

Chronemics. Speech turns are often thought to correspond to deception, but

there is no consensus among researchers as to the exact relationship. Most

studies reveal that deceivers talk less, especially in response to direct

questions.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions (Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 283.

1. Studies show that people engage in deception much more than they care to

admit. Do you consider yourself a good deceiver? Why or why not? Which,

if any, of the nonverbal cues discussed do you think help you deceive

others or give you away?

2. For each of the following scenarios, note (1) what behaviors may indicate

deception, (2) alternative explanations for the behaviors (aside from

deception), and (3) questions you could ask to get more information

before making a judgment.

Scenario 1. A politician is questioned by a reporter about allegations that she

used taxpayer money to fund personal vacations. She looks straight at the

reporter, crosses one leg over the other, and says, “I’ve worked for the people of

this community for ten years and no one has ever questioned my ethics until

now.” As she speaks, she points her index finger at the politician and uses a stern

and clear tone of voice.

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Scenario 2. You ask your roommate if you can borrow his car to go pick up a

friend from the train station about ten miles away. He says, “Um, well…I had

already made plans to go to dinner with Cal and he drove last time so it’s kind of

my turn to drive this time. I mean, is there someone else you could ask or

someone else who could get her? You know I don’t mind sharing things with you,

and I would totally let you, you know, if I didn’t have this thing to do. Sorry.” As

he says, “Sorry,” he raises both of his hands, with his palms facing toward you,

and shrugs.

Scenario 3. A professor asks a student to explain why he didn’t cite sources for

several passages in his paper that came from various websites. The student

scratches his head and says, “What do you mean? Those were my ideas. I did look

at several websites, but I didn’t directly quote anything so I didn’t think I needed

to put the citations in parentheses.” As he says this, he rubs the back of his neck

and then scratches his face and only makes minimal eye contact with the

professor.

K E Y T A K E A W A Y S

• To improve your competence encoding nonverbal messages, increase your

awareness of the messages you are sending and receiving and the contexts in

which your communication is taking place. Since nonverbal communication is

multichannel, it is important to be aware that nonverbal cues can complement,

enhance, or contradict each other. Also realize that the norms and expectations

for sending nonverbal messages, especially touch and personal space, vary widely

between relational and professional contexts.

• To improve your competence decoding nonverbal messages, look for multiple

nonverbal cues, avoid putting too much weight on any one cue, and evaluate

nonverbal messages in relation to the context and your previous experiences

with the other person. Although we put more weight on nonverbal

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communication than verbal when trying to detect deception, there is no set

guide that can allow us to tell whether or not another person is being deceptive.

E X E R C I S E S

1. Getting integrated: As was indicated earlier, research shows that instruction in

nonverbal communication can lead people to make gains in their nonverbal

communication competence. List some nonverbal skills that you think are

important in each of the following contexts: academic, professional, personal,

and civic.

2. Using concepts from this section, analyze your own nonverbal encoding

competence. What are your strengths and weaknesses? Do the same for your

nonverbal decoding competence

3. To understand how chronemics relates to nonverbal communication norms,

answer the following questions: In what situations is it important to be early? In

what situations can you arrive late? How long would you wait on someone you

were meeting for a group project for a class? A date? A job interview?

4.4 Nonverbal Communication in Context

L E A R N I N G O B J E C T I V E S

1. Discuss the role of nonverbal communication in relational contexts.

2. Discuss the role of nonverbal communication in professional contexts.

3. Provide examples of cultural differences in nonverbal communication.

4. Provide examples of gender differences in nonverbal communication.

Nonverbal communication receives less attention than verbal communication as

a part of our everyday lives. Learning more about nonverbal communication and

becoming more aware of our own and others’ use of nonverbal cues can help us

be better relational partners and better professionals. In addition, learning about

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cultural differences in nonverbal communication is important for people

traveling abroad but also due to our increasingly multinational business world

and the expanding diversity and increased frequency of intercultural

communication within our own borders.

Nonverbal Communication in Relational Contexts

A central, if not primary, function of nonverbal communication is the

establishment and maintenance of interpersonal relationships. Further, people

who are skilled at encoding nonverbal messages have various interpersonal

advantages, including being more popular, having larger social networks

consisting of both acquaintances and close friends, and being less likely to be

lonely or socially anxious.Ronald E. Riggio, “Social Interaction Skills and

Nonverbal Behavior,” in Applications of Nonverbal Behavior Theories and

Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 15.

Nonverbal communication increases our expressivity, and people generally find

attractive and want to pay more attention to things that are expressive. This

increases our chances of initiating interpersonal relationships. Relationships then

form as a result of some initial exchanges of verbal and nonverbal information

through mutual self-disclosure. As the depth of self-disclosure increases,

messages become more meaningful if they are accompanied by congruent

nonverbal cues. Impressions formed at this stage of interaction help determine

whether or not a relationship will progress. As relationships progress from basic

information exchange and the establishment of early interpersonal bonds to

more substantial emotional connections, nonverbal communication plays a more

central role. As we’ve learned, nonverbal communication conveys much

emotional meaning, so the ability to effectively encode and decode appropriate

nonverbal messages sent through facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, and

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touch leads to high-quality interactions that are rewarding for the

communicators involved.

Nonverbal communication helps maintain relationships once they have moved

beyond the initial stages by helping us communicate emotions and seek and

provide social and emotional support. In terms of communicating emotions,

competent communicators know when it is appropriate to express emotions and

when more self-regulation is needed. They also know how to adjust their

emotional expressions to fit various contexts and individuals, which is useful in

preventing emotional imbalances within a relationship. Emotional imbalances

occur when one relational partner expresses too much emotion in a way that

becomes a burden for the other person. Ideally, each person in a relationship is

able to express his or her emotions in a way that isn’t too taxing for the other

person. Occasionally, one relational partner may be going through an extended

period of emotional distress, which can become very difficult for other people in

his or her life. Since people with nonverbal communication competence are

already more likely to have larger social support networks, it is likely that they

will be able to spread around their emotional communication, specifically related

to negative emotions, in ways that do not burden others. Unfortunately, since

people with less nonverbal skill are likely to have smaller social networks, they

may end up targeting one or two people for their emotional communication,

which could lead the other people to withdraw from the relationship.

Expressing the need for support is also an important part of relational

maintenance. People who lack nonverbal encoding skills may send unclear or

subtle cues requesting support that are not picked up on by others, which can

lead to increased feelings of loneliness. Skilled encoders of nonverbal messages,

on the other hand, are able to appropriately communicate the need for support in

recognizable ways. As relationships progress in terms of closeness and intimacy,

nonverbal signals become a shorthand form of communicating, as information

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can be conveyed with a particular look, gesture, tone of voice, or posture. Family

members, romantic couples, close friends, and close colleagues can bond over

their familiarity with each other’s nonverbal behaviors, which creates a shared

relational reality that is unique to the relationship.

Nonverbal Communication in Professional Contexts

Surveys of current professionals and managers have found that most report that

nonverbal skills are important to their jobs.Peter J. DePaulo, “Applications of

Nonverbal Behavior Research in Marketing and Management,” Applications of

Nonverbal Behavior Theories and Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale,

NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 63. Although important, there is rarely any

training or instruction related to nonverbal communication, and a consistent

issue that has been reported by employees has been difficulty with mixed

messages coming from managers. Interpreting contradictory verbal and

nonverbal messages is challenging in any context and can have negative effects

on job satisfaction and productivity. As a supervisor who gives positive and

negative feedback regularly and/or in periodic performance evaluations, it is

important to be able to match nonverbal signals with the content of the message.

For example, appropriate nonverbal cues can convey the seriousness of a

customer or coworker complaint, help ease the delivery of constructive criticism,

or reinforce positive feedback. Professionals also need to be aware of how

context, status, and power intersect with specific channels of nonverbal

communication. For example, even casual touching of supervisees, mentees, or

employees may be considered condescending or inappropriate in certain

situations. A well-deserved pat on the back is different from an unnecessary hand

on the shoulder to say hello at the start of a business meeting.

In professional contexts, managers and mentors with nonverbal decoding skills

can exhibit sensitivity to others’ nonverbal behavior and better relate to

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employees and mentees. In general, interpreting emotions from nonverbal cues

can have interpersonal and professional benefits. One study found that

salespeople who were skilled at recognizing emotions through nonverbal cues

sold more products and earned higher salaries.Kristin Byron, Sophia Terranova,

and Stephen Nowicki Jr., “Nonverbal Emotion Recognition and Salespersons:

Linking Ability to Perceived and Actual Success,” Journal of Applied Social

Psychology 37, no. 11 (2007): 2600–2619. Aside from bringing financial rewards,

nonverbal communication also helps create supportive climates. Bosses,

supervisors, and service providers like therapists can help create rapport and a

positive climate by consciously mirroring the nonverbal communication of their

employees or clients. In addition, mirroring the nonverbal communication of

others during a job interview, during a sales pitch, or during a performance

evaluation can help put the other person at ease and establish rapport. Much of

the mirroring we do is natural, so trying to overcompensate may actually be

detrimental, but engaging in self-monitoring and making small adjustments

could be beneficial.Peter J. DePaulo, “Applications of Nonverbal Behavior

Research in Marketing and Management,” in Applications of Nonverbal

Behavior Theories and Research, ed. Robert S. Feldman (Hillsdale, NJ:

Lawrence Erlbaum, 1992), 71–73.

You can also use nonverbal communication to bring positive attention to

yourself. Being able to nonverbally encode turn-taking cues can allow people to

contribute to conversations at relevant times, and getting an idea or a piece of

information or feedback in at the right time can help bring attention to your

professional competence. Being able to encode an appropriate amount of

professionalism and enthusiasm during a job interview can also aid in desired

impression formation since people make judgments about others’ personalities

based on their nonverbal cues. A person who comes across as too enthusiastic

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may be seen as pushy or fake, and a person who comes across as too relaxed may

be seen as unprofessional and unmotivated.

Nonverbal Communication and Culture

As with other aspects of communication, norms for nonverbal communication

vary from country to country and also among cultures within a particular

country. We’ve already learned that some nonverbal communication behaviors

appear to be somewhat innate because they are universally recognized. Two such

universal signals are the “eyebrow flash” of recognition when we see someone we

know and the open hand and the palm up gesture that signals a person would like

something or needs help.Judith N. Martin and Thomas K.

Nakayama, Intercultural Communication in Contexts, 5th ed. (Boston, MA:

McGraw-Hill, 2010), 271. Smiling is also a universal nonverbal behavior, but the

triggers that lead a person to smile vary from culture to culture. The expansion of

media, particularly from the United States and other Western countries around

the world, is leading to more nonverbal similarities among cultures, but the

biggest cultural differences in nonverbal communication occur within the

categories of eye contact, touch, and personal space.Allan Pease and Barbara

Pease, The Definitive Book of Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004),

112–13. Next, we will overview some interesting and instructive differences

within several channels of nonverbal communication that we have discussed so

far. As you read, remember that these are not absolute, in that nonverbal

communication like other forms of communication is influenced by context and

varies among individuals within a particular cultural group as well.

Kinesics

Cultural variations in the way we gesture, use head movements, and use eye

contact fall under the nonverbal category of kinesics.

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Gestures

Remember that emblems are gestures that correspond to a word and an agreed-

on meaning. When we use our fingers to count, we are using emblematic

gestures, but even our way of counting varies among cultures.Allan Pease and

Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam,

2004), 108. I could fairly accurately separate British people and US Americans

from French, Greek, and German people based on a simple and common gesture.

Let’s try this exercise: First, display with your hand the number five. Second,

keeping the five displayed, change it to a two. If you are from the United States or

Britain you are probably holding up your index finder and your middle finger. If

you are from another European country you are probably holding up your thumb

and index finger. While Americans and Brits start counting on their index finger

and end with five on their thumb, other Europeans start counting on their thumb

and end with five on their pinky finger.

How you use your hands can also get you into trouble if you’re unaware of

cultural differences.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of Body

Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 110–11. For example, the “thumbs up”

gesture, as we just learned, can mean “one” in mainland Europe, but it also

means “up yours” in Greece (when thrust forward) and is recognized as a signal

for hitchhiking or “good,” “good job / way to go,” or “OK” in many other cultures.

Two hands up with the palms out can signal “ten” in many Western countries and

is recognized as a signal for “I’m telling the truth” or “I surrender” in many

cultures. The same gesture, however, means “up yours twice” in Greece. So using

that familiar gesture to say you surrender might actually end up escalating rather

than ending a conflict if used in Greece.

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You can take a cross-cultural awareness quiz to learn some more interesting

cultural variations in gestures at the following

link:http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/resources/quiz/gestures.php.

Video Clip 4.1

Soccer Player Directs Insult Gesture to Referee

(click to see video)

Head Movements

Bowing is a nonverbal greeting ritual that is more common in Asian cultures than

Western cultures, but the head nod, which is a common form of

acknowledgement in many cultures, is actually an abbreviated bow. Japan is

considered a noncontact culture, which refers to cultural groups in which people

stand farther apart while talking, make less eye contact, and touch less during

regular interactions. Because of this, bowing is the preferred nonverbal greeting

over handshaking. Bows vary based on status, with higher status people bowing

the least. For example, in order to indicate the status of another person, a

Japanese businessperson may bow deeply. An interesting ritual associated with

the bow is the exchange of business cards when greeting someone in Japan. This

exchange allows each person to view the other’s occupation and title, which

provides useful information about the other’s status and determines who should

bow more. Since bowing gives each person a good view of the other person’s

shoes, it is very important to have clean shoes that are in good condition, since

they play an important part of initial impression formation.

Eye Contact

In some cultures, avoiding eye contact is considered a sign of respect. Such eye

contact aversion, however, could be seen as a sign that the other person is being

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deceptive, is bored, or is being rude. Some Native American nations teach that

people should avoid eye contact with elders, teachers, and other people with

status. This can create issues in classrooms when teachers are unaware of this

norm and may consider a Native American student’s lack of eye contact as a sign

of insubordination or lack of engagement, which could lead to false impressions

that the student is a troublemaker or less intelligent.

Haptics

As we’ve learned, touch behaviors are important during initial interactions, and

cultural differences in these nonverbal practices can lead to miscommunication

and misunderstanding. Shaking hands as a typical touch greeting, for example,

varies among cultures.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The Definitive Book of

Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 114. It is customary for British,

Australian, German, and US American colleagues to shake hands when seeing

each other for the first time and then to shake again when departing company. In

the United States, the colleagues do not normally shake hands again if they see

each other again later in the day, but European colleagues may shake hands with

each other several times a day. Once a certain level of familiarity and closeness is

reached, US American colleagues will likely not even shake hands daily unless

engaging in some more formal interaction, but many European colleagues will

continue to shake each time they see each other. Some French businesspeople

have been known to spend up to thirty minutes a day shaking hands. The

squeezes and up-and-down shakes used during handshakes are often called

“pumps,” and the number of pumps used in a handshake also varies among

cultures. Although the Germans and French shake hands more often throughout

the day, they typically only give one or two pumps and then hold the shake for a

couple seconds before letting go. Brits tend to give three to five pumps, and US

Americans tend to give five to seven pumps. This can be humorous to watch at a

multinational business event, but it also affects the initial impressions people

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make of each other. A US American may think that a German is being unfriendly

or distant because of his or her single hand pump, while a German may think that

a US American is overdoing it with seven.

Contact cultures are cultural groups in which people stand closer together,

engage in more eye contact, touch more frequently, and speak more loudly.

Italians are especially known for their vibrant nonverbal communication in terms

of gestures, volume, eye contact, and touching, which not surprisingly places

them in the contact culture category. Italians use hand motions and touching to

regulate the flow of conversations, and when non-Italians don’t know how to

mirror an Italian’s nonverbals they may not get to contribute much to the

conversation, which likely feeds into the stereotype of Italians as domineering in

conversations or overexpressive. For example, Italians speak with their hands

raised as a way to signal that they are holding the floor for their conversational

turn. If their conversational partner starts to raise his or her hands, the Italian

might gently touch the other person and keep on talking. Conversational partners

often interpret this as a sign of affection or of the Italian’s passion for what he or

she is saying. In fact, it is a touch intended to keep the partner from raising his or

her hands, which would signal that the Italian’s conversational turn is over and

the other person now has the floor. It has been suggested that in order to get a

conversational turn, you must physically grab their hands in midair and pull

them down. While this would seem very invasive and rude to northern Europeans

and US Americans, it is a nonverbal norm in Italian culture and may be the only

way to get to contribute to a conversation.Allan Pease and Barbara Pease, The

Definitive Book of Body Language (New York, NY: Bantam, 2004), 115.

Vocalics

The volume at which we speak is influenced by specific contexts and is more

generally influenced by our culture. In European countries like France, England,

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Sweden, and Germany, it is not uncommon to find restaurants that have small

tables very close together. In many cases, two people dining together may be

sitting at a table that is actually touching the table of another pair of diners. Most

US Americans would consider this a violation of personal space, and Europeans

often perceive US Americans to be rude in such contexts because they do not

control the volume of their conversations more. Since personal space is usually

more plentiful in the United States, Americans are used to speaking at a level that

is considered loud to many cultures that are used to less personal space. I have

personally experienced both sides of this while traveling abroad. One time, my

friends and I were asked to leave a restaurant in Sweden because another table

complained that we were being loud. Another time, at a restaurant in Argentina, I

was disturbed, as were the others dining around me, by a “loud” table of

Americans seated on the other side of the dining area. In this case, even though

we were also Americans, we were bothered by the lack of cultural awareness

being exhibited by the other Americans at the restaurant. These examples show

how proxemics and vocalics can combine to make for troubling, but hopefully

informative, nonverbal intercultural encounters.

Proxemics

Cultural norms for personal space vary much more than some other nonverbal

communication channels such as facial expressions, which have more universal

similarity and recognizability. We’ve already learned that contact and noncontact

cultures differ in their preferences for touch and interpersonal distance.

Countries in South America and southern Europe exhibit characteristics of

contact cultures, while countries in northern Europe and Southeast Asia exhibit

noncontact cultural characteristics. Because of the different comfort levels with

personal space, a Guatemalan and a Canadian might come away with differing

impressions of each other because of proxemic differences. The Guatemalan may

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feel the Canadian is standoffish, and the Canadian may feel the Guatemalan is

pushy or aggressive.

Chronemics

The United States and many northern and western European countries have

a monochronicorientation to time, meaning time is seen as a commodity that can

be budgeted, saved, spent, and wasted. Events are to be scheduled in advance and

have set beginning and ending times. Countries like Spain and Mexico have

a polychronic orientation to time. Appointments may be scheduled at overlapping

times, making an “orderly” schedule impossible. People may also miss

appointments or deadlines without offering an apology, which would be

considered very rude by a person with a monochronic orientation to time. People

from cultures with a monochronic orientation to time are frustrated when people

from polychromic cultures cancel appointments or close businesses for family

obligations. Conversely, people from polychromic cultures feel that US

Americans, for example, follow their schedules at the expense of personal

relationships.Judith N. Martin and Thomas K. Nakayama,Intercultural

Communication in Contexts, 5th ed. (Boston, MA: McGraw-Hill, 2010), 278.

Nonverbal Communication and Gender

Gender and communication scholar Kathryn Dindia contests the notion that men

and women are from different planets and instead uses another analogy. She says

men are from South Dakota and women are from North Dakota. Although the

states border each other and are similar in many ways, state pride and in-group

identifications lead the people of South Dakota to perceive themselves to be

different from the people of North Dakota and vice versa. But if we expand our

perspective and take the position of someone from California or Illinois, North

Dakotans and South Dakotans are pretty much alike.Peter A.

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Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions (Mountain View,

CA: Mayfield, 1999), 106. This comparison is intended to point out that in our

daily lives we do experience men and women to be fairly different, but when we

look at the differences between men and women compared to the differences

between humans and other creatures, men and women are much more similar

than different. For example, in terms of nonverbal communication, men and

women all over the world make similar facial expressions and can recognize those

facial expressions in one another. We use similar eye contact patterns, gestures,

and, within cultural groups, have similar notions of the use of time and space. As

I will reiterate throughout this book, it’s important to understand how gender

influences communication, but it’s also important to remember that in terms of

communication, men and women are about 99 percent similar and 1 percent

different.

Kinesics

Although men and women are mostly similar in terms of nonverbal

communication, we can gain a better understanding of the role that gender plays

in influencing our social realities by exploring some of the channel-specific

differences.Peter A. Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and

Functions(Mountain View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 118–21. Within the category of

kinesics, we will discuss some gender differences in how men and women use

gestures, posture, eye contact, and facial expressions.

Gestures

• Women use more gestures in regular conversation than do men, but men

tend to use larger gestures than women when they do use them.

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• Men are, however, more likely to use physical adaptors like restless foot

and hand movements, probably because girls are socialized to avoid such

movements because they are not “ladylike.”

Posture

• Men are more likely to lean in during an interaction than are women.

• Women are more likely to have a face-to-face body orientation while

interacting than are men.

Women’s tendency to use a face-to-face body orientation influences the general

conclusion that women are better at sending and receiving nonverbal messages

than men. Women’s more direct visual engagement during interactions allows

them to take in more nonverbal cues, which allows them to better reflect on and

more accurately learn from experience what particular nonverbal cues mean in

what contexts.

Eye Contact

• In general, women make more eye contact than men. As we learned,

women use face-to-face body orientations in conversations more often

than men, which likely facilitates more sustained eye contact.

• Overall, women tend to do more looking and get looked at more than men.

Facial Expressions

• Women reveal emotion through facial expressions more frequently and

more accurately than men.

• Men are more likely than women to exhibit angry facial expressions.

Men are often socialized to believe it is important to hide their emotions. This is

especially evident in the case of smiling, with women smiling more than men.

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This also contributes to the stereotype of the more emotionally aware and

nurturing woman, since people tend to like and view as warmer others who show

positive emotion. Gender socialization plays a role in facial displays as girls are

typically rewarded for emotional displays, especially positive ones, and boys are

rewarded when they conceal emotions—for instance, when they are told to “suck

it up,” “take it like a man,” or “show sportsmanship” by not gloating or

celebrating openly.

Haptics

• Although it is often assumed that men touch women more than women

touch men, this hasn’t been a consistent research finding. In fact,

differences in touch in cross-gender interactions are very small.

• Women do engage in more touching when interacting with same-gender

conversational partners than do men.

• In general, men tend to read more sexual intent into touch than do

women, who often underinterpret sexual intent.Peter A.

Andersen, Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions(Mountain

View, CA: Mayfield, 1999), 125.

There is a touch taboo for men in the United States. In fact, research supports the

claim that men’s aversion to same-gender touching is higher in the United States

than in other cultures, which shows that this taboo is culturally relative. For

example, seeing two adult men holding hands in public in Saudi Arabia would

signal that the men are close friends and equals, but it wouldn’t signal that they

are sexually attracted to each other.Judith N. Martin and Thomas K.

Nakayama, Intercultural Communication in Contexts, 5th ed. (Boston, MA:

McGraw-Hill, 2010), 274. The touch taboo also extends to cross-gender

interactions in certain contexts. It’s important to be aware of the potential

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interpretations of touch, especially as they relate to sexual and aggressive

interpretations.

Vocalics

• Women are socialized to use more vocal variety, which adds to the

stereotype that women are more expressive than men.

• In terms of pitch, women tend more than men to end their sentences with

an upward inflection of pitch, which implies a lack of certainty, even when

there isn’t.

A biological difference between men and women involves vocal pitch, with men’s

voices being lower pitched and women’s being higher. Varying degrees of

importance and social meaning are then placed on these biological differences,

which lead some men and women to consciously or unconsciously exaggerate the

difference. Men may speak in a lower register than they would naturally and

women may speak in more soft, breathy tones to accentuate the pitch differences.

These ways of speaking often start as a conscious choice after adolescence to

better fit into socially and culturally proscribed gender performances, but they

can become so engrained that people spend the rest of their lives speaking in a

voice that is a modified version of their natural tone.

Proxemics

• Men are implicitly socialized to take up as much space as possible, and

women are explicitly socialized to take up less space.

• In terms of interpersonal distance, research shows that women interact in

closer proximity to one another than do men.

• Men do not respond as well as women in situations involving crowding.

High-density environments evoke more negative feelings from men, which

can even lead to physical violence in very crowded settings.

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Men are generally larger than women, which is a biological difference that gains

social and cultural meaning when certain behaviors and norms are associated

with it. For example, women are told to sit in a “ladylike” way, which usually

means to cross and/or close their legs and keep their limbs close to their body.

Men, on the other hand, sprawl out in casual, professional, and formal situations

without their use of space being reprimanded or even noticed in many cases.

If you’ll recall our earlier discussion of personal space, we identified two subzones

within the personal zone that extends from 1.5 to 4 feet from our body. Men seem

to be more comfortable with casual and social interactions that are in the outer

subzone, which is 2.5 to 4 feet away, meaning men prefer to interact at an arm’s

length from another person. This also plays into the stereotypes of women as

more intimate and nurturing and men as more distant and less intimate.

Self-Presentation

• Men and women present themselves differently, with women, in general,

accentuating their physical attractiveness more and men accentuating

signs of their status and wealth more.

• Men and women may engage in self-presentation that exaggerates existing

biological differences between male and female bodies.

Most people want to present themselves in ways that accentuate their

attractiveness, at least in some situations where impression management is

important to fulfill certain instrumental, relational, or identity needs. Gender

socialization over many years has influenced how we present ourselves in terms

of attractiveness. Research shows that women’s physical attractiveness is more

important to men than men’s physical attractiveness is to women. Women do

take physical attractiveness into account, but a man’s social status and wealth has

been shown to be more important.

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Men and women also exaggerate biological and socially based sex and gender

differences on their own. In terms of biology, men and women’s bodies are

generally different, which contributes to the nonverbal area related to personal

appearance. Many men and women choose clothing that accentuates these bodily

differences. For example, women may accentuate their curves with specific

clothing choices and men may accentuate their size—for example, by wearing a

suit with shoulder padding to enhance the appearance of broad shoulders. These

choices vary in terms of the level of consciousness at which they are made. Men

are also hairier than women, and although it isn’t always the case and grooming

varies by culture, many women shave their legs and remove body hair while men

may grow beards or go to great lengths to reverse baldness to accentuate these

differences. Of course, the more recent trend of “manscaping” now has some men

trimming or removing body hair from their chests, arms, and/or legs.

K E Y T A K E A W A Y S

• A central function of nonverbal communication is the establishment and

maintenance of interpersonal relationships. Nonverbal communication helps

initiate relationships through impression management and self-disclosure and

then helps maintain relationships as it aids in emotional expressions that request

and give emotional support.

• Professionals indicate that nonverbal communication is an important part of their

jobs. Organizational leaders can use nonverbal decoding skills to tell when

employees are under stress and in need of support and can then use encoding

skills to exhibit nonverbal sensitivity. Nonverbal signals can aid in impression

management in professional settings, such as in encoding an appropriate amount

of enthusiasm and professionalism.

• Although some of our nonverbal signals appear to be more innate and culturally

universal, many others vary considerably among cultures, especially in terms of

the use of space (proxemics), eye contact (oculesics), and touch (haptics). Rather

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than learning a list of rules for cultural variations in nonverbal cues, it is better to

develop more general knowledge about how nonverbal norms vary based on

cultural values and to view this knowledge as tools that can be adapted for use in

many different cultural contexts.

• In terms of gender, most of the nonverbal differences between men and women

are exaggerations of biological differences onto which we have imposed certain

meanings and values. Men and women’s nonverbal communication, as with

other aspects of communication, is much more similar than different. Research

has consistently found, however, that women gesture, make eye contact, touch

and stand close to same-gender conversational partners, and use positive facial

expressions more than men.

E X E R C I S E S

1. Identify some nonverbal behaviors that would signal a positive interaction on a

first date and on a job interview. Then identify some nonverbal behaviors that

would signal a negative interaction in each of those contexts.

2. Discuss an experience where you have had some kind of miscommunication or

misunderstanding because of cultural or gender differences in encoding and

decoding nonverbal messages. What did you learn in this chapter that could help

you in similar future interactions?