assignment

UNIT 4 LEADING INDIVIDUALS AND GROUPS 15. Effective and Ethical Use of Power and Influence 16. Networking and Mentoring 17. Coaching and Providing Feedback for Improved

Performance 18. Leading and Empowering Self and Others 19. Project Management

UNIT 3 UNDERSTANDING AND WORKING IN TEAMS 9. Negotiation 10. Building Teams and Work Groups 11. Managing Interpersonal and Organizational

Conflict 12. Achieving Business Results through Effective

Meetings 13. Facilitating Team Success 14. Making Decisions and Solving Problems Creatively

UNIT 2 INTERPERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS: UNDERSTANDING AND WORKING WITH OTHERS 5. Understanding and Working with Diverse Others 6. Listening and Nonverbal Communication 7. Communicating Effectively 8. Persuading Individuals and Audiences

UNIT 1 INTRAPERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS: UNDERSTANDING YOURSELF 1. Journey into Self-awareness 2. Self-disclosure and Trust 3. Establishing Goals Consistent with Your Values

and Ethics 4. Self-management

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T he first leg of your journey toward interpersonal skill development begins with an opportunity to take inventory of your strengths and your development goals. This first unit is devoted to intrapersonal effectiveness—understanding yourself (and your goals, strengths, weaknesses, style, biases) and improving self-management skills, such as emotional intelligence, time management, and stress management. As you’ll discover, “knowing yourself ” may not be as easy as it sounds. We give you the tools to facilitate this process. Each of the four chapters in this unit helps you increase the odds of achieving intrapersonal effectiveness, and ultimately, personal and profes- sional success and satisfaction. This first leg provides a solid start to your journey, as well as a strong foundation on which to build interpersonal, team-based, and leadership skills in the units that follow.

Unit 1

Unit One: Intrapersonal E�ectiveness: Understanding

Yourself

Unit Two: Interpersonal E�ectiveness: Understanding and Working with Others

Unit Four: Leading

Individuals and Groups

Unit Three: Understanding and Working in

Teams

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4

Learning Points

How do I: • Figure out my strengths and understand how they might guide me in

personal and professional choices? • Know what motivates me in order to reach my potential? • Assess my limitations and develop a plan for improving in these areas? • Gain understanding and insight into my personality, attitudes, and

behaviors? • Identify the biases I have that affect my understanding and appreciation

of others?

Jacob Morgan, age 22, was excited about his first job out of college. He had worked sum- mer jobs and one internship, but never in an environment as professional as the bank for which he’d work upon graduation. After taking some time off in the summer, he began work in August. Eager to show he was worthy of having been hired, he worked hard the first six months on the job. He enjoyed his co-workers, got along well with his manager, and was even involved in a technology project through which he was able to meet people from other departments of the bank. The project objective was to develop a new system to handle customers. The present sys- tem barely met the needs of the bank’s customers and was inefficient and costly to run. Over a period of several weeks, Jacob and his project team members worked diligently to study the problem and develop a solution. The team consisted of Jacob plus five co-workers: two were about his age and the other three were considerably older. Four of the five were college educated and all but one team member had greater tenure than he had. Of the six-person team, three were Caucasian, two were African American, and one was Asian American. The team did not have an official leader. Things ran smoothly for several weeks, until the time came for decisions to be made. As soon as a deadline was imposed on the group, Jacob became aware of some significant personality differences within the project team. Two members who had always arrived late to meetings were procrastinating on their assignments for the project. Two others who had attended the meetings began to spend more time socializing than working. One person who had been reluctant to state her opinion about the data that had been col- lected now said she thought the group needed more time before it would be ready to make

1 Journey into Self-awareness

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1 / Journey into Self-awareness 5

a decision. Jacob had been very task oriented all along and was eager to finish the project and move on to other projects within the bank. He was very frustrated with the lack of progress being made by the group and was concerned about being part of a team that wasn’t going to meet its assigned deadline. Yet he was reluctant to speak up. He felt he was too young and hadn’t been at the bank long enough to have credibility with his team- mates and take charge of the project. He didn’t think he could approach his boss about the situation. He was perplexed about why the group was experiencing so many problems. Jacob thought to himself, “Why can’t they get along? Why can’t everyone on the team be more like me? I work hard and have pride in how this project is going to turn out. Why don’t the others?” He began to wonder if this was the right place for him.

1. Why is Jacob upset?

2. In what ways are the work styles of Jacob’s teammates different from his? What causes those differences?

3. Can these differences be resolved? Why or why not?

4. How would you handle the situation if you were Jacob?

“Know thyself.”

Socrates

T he charge to “know thyself ” has commonly been attributed to the ancient philosopher Socrates as well as to Plato, Pythagoras, and Thales. As early as 42 BC, Pubilius Syrus proposed: “It matters not what you are thought to be, but what you are.”1 Understanding yourself—your internal states, preferences, resources, and intuitions—gives you the chance to understand your strengths and shortcomings. This is key not only to your ability to succeed, but also to your ability to work effectively with others. The best managers are keenly aware of their strengths—and their weaknesses.2

Good managers are able to capitalize on their strengths and either improve their limitations or work with others whose qualities complement theirs. They are able to understand others—their motivation, needs, style, capabilities, and limitations—and use this information to motivate and get results from them. They also keep current and regularly engage in self-assessment exercises and experiences that allow them to learn about and improve themselves continually. This chapter describes self-awareness: what it is, why it’s important, and how to improve your level of self-awareness. It also addresses how strong self-knowledge can enhance your ability to manage and work with others and provides a number of exercises that enable you to assess yourself and develop improvement plans.

What Is Self-awareness? Self-awareness is “the capacity for introspection and the ability to reconcile oneself as an individual separate from the environment and other individuals.”3 It is knowing your motivations, preferences, and personality and understanding how these factors influence your judgment, decisions, and interactions with other people. Internal feelings and thoughts, interests, strengths and limitations, culture, your fit within an organization, values, skills, goals, abilities, leadership orientation, career interests, and preferred com- munication style are just a few of the many elements of self-awareness.

Through self-awareness, you develop the ability to know how you are feeling and why, and the impact your feelings have on your behavior. It also involves a capacity to monitor and control biases that potentially affect your decision making. Self-awareness requires a strong commitment to study and evaluate your behaviors and characteristics and make plans for modification as necessary.4

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6 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Self-awareness is the starting point for effectiveness at work. The astute author and states- man Machiavelli wrote, “To lead or attempt to lead without first having a knowledge of self is foolhardy and sure to bring disaster and defeat.” Or as a more contemporary blogger recently wrote: “[F]ew skills are as critical for a leader as that of accurate self- knowledge . . . all of us have a view of ourselves but that view is not always accurate. When it is not accurate we often get in the way of ourselves.”5 Self-awareness can help you:

■ Understand yourself in relation to others. ■ Develop and implement a sound self-improvement program. ■ Set meaningful life and career goals. ■ Develop relationships with others. ■ Understand the value of diversity. ■ Manage others effectively. ■ Increase productivity. ■ Increase your ability to contribute to organizations, your peers, employers, community,

and family.

Knowing what you are good at and what you enjoy doing can help you to select a career or job that is professionally, financially, and personally satisfying. By knowing yourself— your strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes—you’ll know where you “belong.”6

Self-awareness is important for managers and organizations. Managers who have heightened self-awareness are superior performers. Awareness of self often leads to a greater understanding of others. Managers who can relate to or empathize with co- workers are more trusted and are perceived as being more competent.7 Because self- aware managers are in tune with the concerns of others, they are also able to reduce the potential for conflict and are more likely to be open to feedback. Self-aware manag- ers who listen to feedback and make positive modifications to personal behavior are able to create trusting and productive work environments. Working effectively with oth- ers will therefore increase managerial and organizational effectiveness.8

Self-awareness is key for global leaders. Understanding cross-cultural nuances and dif- fering values, work ethics, and motivations of individuals in countries other than your home country is essential for anyone working in business today. All business is global; enhanced self-awareness gives you an understanding of your abilities and also of how to interact and work effectively with others. In a study of global leadership competencies, Jokinen identified three areas of global leadership competence that must be addressed, and self-awareness is at the top of the list, along with inquisitiveness and personal trans- formation. The author also stresses the importance of continuous learning, which is key to ongoing self-awareness and change.9

In assessing your own levels of self-awareness, be aware that cultural differences may play a part in your own awareness and that of others with whom you interact. While we don’t wish to “label” people or groups, some cultures are viewed as more “individu- alistic,” meaning that people define themselves independent of group affiliation, and some as more “collectivist,” meaning that people define themselves in relation to what is acceptable within their group. Typically Westerners are individualists and people from Asian countries are collectivist. In one study it was shown that individualists and collec- tivists use different strategies to increase self-awareness. Individualists use internal infor- mation such as personal emotions when observing themselves, and collectivists assess themselves in relation to group harmony and in relation to group-approved norms.10 Which are you? What individual and group norms affect your level of self-awareness?

Self-awareness is crucial to understand you and the organization where you are work- ing. Each of us can be thought of as an instrument for assessment and change. By ask- ing ourselves a series of questions, we can diagnose our situation and develop some solutions to problems we or our organizations are experiencing. Doing this requires strong self-awareness of our emotional reactions, initial perceptions, biases, and judgments— and a willingness to learn and change continuously. All of these will be considered in this and subsequent chapters.

Why Is Self-awareness Important?

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1 / Journey into Self-awareness 7

“The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none.”

Thomas Carlyle—Scottish author, essayist, and historian (1795–1881)

Self-awareness enables you to make good decisions: A realistic appraisal of your own and others’ needs, objectives, resources, and capabilities can lead to more accurate judgments and more positive outcomes. Lack of self-awareness can lead to poor deci- sions and to an unrealistic notion of one’s competencies. Self-awareness allows you to understand your strengths and core competencies—those core elements that contribute to your success. Lack of self-awareness can result in the opposite—incompetence, because the individual does not realize the gap between his or her perception and the reality of the strengths and competencies in question. Lack of self-awareness has also proven to be correlated with career derailment. In a study by the Center for Creative Leadership, a common factor in derailed careers was “lack of accurate portrait of self.” Those who lack self-awareness are less able to see themselves accurately and are there- fore less able to “midcourse correct” and make modifications necessary for change and improvement.11

“There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one’s self.”

Benjamin Franklin—American diplomat, scientist, inventor, and writer (1706–1790)

Strategies for Gaining Self-awareness The first step to becoming self-aware is to recognize your weaknesses, strengths, biases, attitudes, values, and perceptions. There are many ways to enhance self-awareness. Some of these are taking an online assessment; journaling (see Exercise 1–A); watching certain movies and TV shows to identify people to whom you relate; and seeking feed- back from trusted role models and mentors throughout your career. Analyzing your own experiences, looking at yourself through the eyes of others, self-disclosing, and acquiring diverse experiences can also increase your self-awareness and improve the way you interact with and come across to others.

Self-analysis requires you to step back and observe (as objectively as possible) the fac- tors that influence your behaviors, attitudes, thoughts, or interactions. Self-analysis is not always easy, yet it is necessary for you to increase your effectiveness personally and professionally.

Self-analysis can begin with reflection and exploring your thoughts and feelings. This helps you to obtain new perspectives based on new insights. You can become more effective by implementing new behavioral and cognitive changes in future situations. For instance, Jacob, from the chapter’s opening scenario, has an opportunity to gain self- awareness from his dysfunctional team experience. Through reflection, he could see that his current behavior of remaining silent has not aided the team in its process. Gaining awareness of the impact of his action, or lack of action, could lead to a new perspective regarding teaming and his part in the process and to positive behaviors and attitudes in his current and future team projects. This learning will not only help Jacob in his professional life, but will enhance overall team and organizational effectiveness.

One means to gain insight is through examining your behavior, personality, attitudes, and perceptions. (See Exercise 1–A.)

Behavior is the way in which we conduct ourselves—the way in which we act. Patterns of behavior develop through reactions to events and actions over a period of time (see

Lack of Self-awareness

Self-analysis

Behavior

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8 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Figure 1–1). Behavior is influenced by motivation, thinking process, courses of action, and interaction patterns.12

1. Motivation—the drive to pursue one action over another. What underlying factors move you to make a particular decision or choice? For example, what drives you to do a good job? The answer might be a competitive nature, strong achievement orien- tation, or a difficult childhood experience. Being aware of your core drivers, those things that motivate you—positively and negatively—can help you understand the roots of your behavior and make adjustments as necessary to modify your behavior.

2. Modes of thinking—the way you process the various inputs your brain receives. How do you analyze information and make judgments about how to use and apply that information? For example, do you process information quietly by reflecting on your own, or do you process information aloud by talking with others? Being aware of how you take in and make sense of information can help you understand how you make judgments and decisions that lead to choosing one behavior or course of action over another.

3. Modes of acting—the course of action you apply in a given situation. What approach do you use in response to stimuli, events, and people? For example, when someone does something that offends you, do you react in anger? Or do you react quietly, assessing your options before acting? Being aware of how you express your reaction to things that happen can help you understand the alternatives available when cer- tain events arise.

4. Modes of interacting—the way in which you communicate ideas, opinions, and feel- ings with others. How do you typically share your thoughts with others? For exam- ple, are you comfortable in large groups of people? In team situations? Or do you prefer to work on your own? Being aware of how you work with others can help you understand how your preferred style meshes with others.

Personality describes the relatively stable set of characteristics, tendencies, and tempera- ments that have been formed by heredity and by social, cultural, and environmental factors.13 These traits determine how we interact with and react to various people and situations. Some aspects of our personality are believed to be a result of nature—those traits with which we are born and that we possess through heredity. Other characteris- tics of our personality are thought to be a result of our environment—those factors that we acquire through exposure to people and events in our lives.

Personality

Figure 1–1 Means for Obtaining Self-awareness

Self-awareness (Self-concept)

Self-disclosure DiverseExperiences

Others’ Perceptions Feedback

Self-analysis

Personality Traits Factors Self-monitoring

Thoughts Feelings Emotions

Behavior Motivation Modes of thinking Modes of acting Modes of interacting

Perceptions Stereotypes Selective Perception Projection Expectations Interest Attributions

Attitudes

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1 / Journey into Self-awareness 9

Personality traits are enduring characteristics that describe your attitude and behavior. Examples are agreeableness, aggression, dominance, and shyness. Most of these traits have been found to be quite stable over time.14 This means that if you are cold and uncaring in one situation, you are likely to behave similarly in other situations. The Big Five model15 is a powerful assessment that organizes numerous concepts into a “short list” of just five factors that are representative of the characteristics that can be linked with satisfaction and success. The Big Five model has five primary components (see Exercise 1–B): extroversion, agreeableness, emotional stability, conscientiousness, and openness to experience. Studies show these factors can be linked to job satisfaction, employee attitudes and behavior, stress, and job performance.16 The Big Five factors also relate to overall life satisfaction. “Similar to job satisfaction, life satisfaction appears to be dispositionally based. Moreover, it appears the same traits that predict job satisfaction also predict life satisfaction.”17 While some personality characteristics are inherited, some factors can be modified through training, experience, and a conscious attempt to change.

1. Extroversion assesses the degree to which you are social or antisocial, outgoing or shy, assertive or passive, active or inactive, and talkative or quiet. A person who rates high for the first traits in these pairs is extroverted, while someone who rates high for the second traits is introverted. Extroversion or introversion, in itself, is not necessarily bad, but extremes at both ends of the spectrum can be equally dysfunctional. A person who is too outgoing could be perceived as overbearing, and a person who is too reserved might be perceived as disinterested.

2. Agreeableness measures the degree to which you are friendly or reserved, coopera- tive or guarded, flexible or inflexible, trusting or cautious, good-natured or moody, soft- hearted or tough, and tolerant or judgmental. Those scoring high on the first element of these paired traits are viewed as agreeable and easy to work with, while those rating low are viewed as more disagreeable and difficult to work with. Being too agreeable could cause a person to be too accommodating, however, and others may take advan- tage of this weakness.

3. Emotional stability measures the degree to which you are consistent in how you react to certain events, weigh options before acting, and look at a situation objectively. Those who rate high on emotional stability are viewed as generally calm, stable, having a positive attitude, able to manage their anger, secure, happy, and objective. Those who rate lower are more likely to be anxious, depressed, angry, insecure, worried, and emotional.

4. Conscientiousness represents the degree to which you are dependable, can be counted on, follow through on commitments, and keep promises. Those who rate high on conscientiousness are generally perceived to be careful, thorough, organized, persis- tent, achievement oriented, hardworking, and persevering. Those who score lower on this dimension are more likely to be viewed as inattentive to detail, uncaring, disre- spectful, not interested or motivated, unorganized, apt to give up easily, and lazy.

5. Openness to experience considers whether you are interested in broadening your horizons or limiting them, learning new things or sticking with what you already know, meeting new people or associating with current friends and co-workers, going to new places or restricting yourself to known places. Individuals who score high on this factor tend to be highly intellectual, broad-minded, curious, imaginative, and cultured. Those who rate lower tend to be more narrow-minded, less interested in the outside world, and uncomfortable in unfamiliar surroundings and situations. Professionals who are open to experience are more willing to reflect on feedback for personal development.

Your Personality

■ What are the characteristics of your personality? How do you know this? (See Exercise 1–B.)

(continued)

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10 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Self-monitoring is the ability to regulate your thinking before speaking or acting. This allows you to quickly assess the needs of others or of a social or business situation and adapt your behavior and interactions accordingly.18 Monitoring your own personality can help you come to grips with both positive qualities and those you would like to change. By being aware of the role of self-monitoring, you can assess your own attitudes, diag- nose which elements you are satisfied with, and identify and develop plans for address- ing those aspects you want to change. When self-monitoring, set your standards in accordance with certain accepted norms. High self-monitors are very sensitive to external cues and constantly adapt (and often hide) their true selves to conform to a situation or set of expectations. Low self-monitors display their feelings, attitudes, and behaviors in every situation. In an organizational setting, it is probably best to avoid the extremes. You don’t want to be a high self-monitor (solely concerned with what others think) or a low self-monitor (not at all interested in what others think). Always trying to please everyone or conforming to gain everyone’s approval—while it might facilitate getting what you want in the short term—can be harmful to you in the long term. Conversely, never adjusting your behavior relative to the audience or situation can be self-defeating.

All of the personality dimensions can have a significant impact on job performance and interpersonal relationships.19 By understanding the meaning of these factors, you can pinpoint areas for personal and professional development and growth. Knowledge of your ratings on each of these dimensions can also help in selecting a career. Much research in the area of person/job fit demonstrates that individuals who select profes- sions that suit their personality are more likely to be satisfied and productive.20 Finding work that matches your personal preferences may require a fair amount of investigation; this investment in time and resources pays big dividends—success and happiness. For example, a person who is low on the extroversion and agreeableness factors would prob- ably not be happy (or successful) as a traveling sales representative. The basic nature of the job requires an outgoing, friendly individual in order to contact and build a rapport with clients. A poor fit between one’s personality and job can be a recipe for disaster.

Attitudes are evaluative statements or “learned predispositions to respond to an object, person or idea in a favorable or unfavorable way.”21 As human beings, we can choose how we think and feel about a situation or event. Imagine you are on an airplane that has been diverted to another airport due to bad weather. You can choose to become irritated and show your anger to the flight attendant, or you can be patient, acknowl- edge that nothing can be done to change the situation, and take out a good book to read while waiting for your flight to land. The emotions we choose to act on determine our attitude. This in turn is reflected in our behavior.

Self-monitoring

Attitudes

■ Which aspects of your personality do you like, and which would you like to modify? ■ While it’s true that some of these factors are ingrained, few of these factors are

fixed in stone. You can identify those qualities that are working well for you and worth keeping, as well as those qualities that aren’t working well for you that you can change or abandon.

Your Attitude

Attitude can vary from situation to situation. For example, you might have a positive outlook when with friends, feel negatively about your work, and have a neutral atti- tude toward your academic experience. Attitudes are derived from supervisors, par- ents, teachers, peers, society, and our own experiences. Attitudes are one of the less stable facets of our personality, which means they are easier to influence and change than our behaviors or values.22 This is good news because with some effort you can almost always change the way you react to events and people and develop a positive outlook on life even when circumstances change.

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1 / Journey into Self-awareness 11

Strong attitudes can impact your professional and personal relationships. As a stu- dent or manager, it is helpful to remember how much of a role your attitude can play in your success. Your demeanor, whether you are with others or grappling with an issue on your own, can make a significant difference in what behaviors you choose to exer- cise and in the outcomes of your efforts. Have you heard the saying, “She takes lemons and turns them into lemonade”? This is an example of the power of attitude. Your atti- tude can determine whether you think positively and take control of a situation or think negatively and feel helpless about your ability to change or respond to a situation. Attitude is important to being productive at work or in school.

Attitude can influence those around us. Being aware of your own attitude and mak- ing choices about which attitude to display to others is very important. Attitude can affect your job behavior as well as your interactions with others. Friends, significant others, family members, co-workers, and others are definitely influenced by your thoughts and feelings toward situations. As a manager, it is also important to recognize your employees are affected by the attitude you display toward them and toward the work that needs to get done. A manager’s attitude is a large factor in how people feel about their jobs. If a manager is upbeat most of the time and supportive of his or her colleagues, employees will generally respond well and work hard to produce the desired results. On the other hand, if a manager is pessimistic and belittling toward his or her employees, staff morale will suffer and, ultimately, so will the expected outcomes.

Perception is the process by which you select, evaluate, and organize information and make sense of it.23 When you encounter a person or situation, you use your senses to absorb various inputs. Next, your brain selects aspects from stored information in order to process and organize these inputs. Finally, your brain interprets and evalu- ates the person or situation. Perception is person-specific—no two people will take in, organize, and evaluate inputs the same way. Your perspective on a situation can be entirely different from the way another person looks at the exact same situation. Two friends walking by the window of a crowded restaurant spot a couple engaged in con- versation. One friend, taking notice of their mannerisms and gestures, concludes that it “looks like they’re breaking off their relationship.” The other friend vehemently dis- agrees. “No, they’re probably discussing a plan to spend more time together.” Which friend is right?

Individual perception may not always be consistent with reality; it is only the per- ceiver’s interpretation of reality.24 For example, when you go to a movie with a group, your opinion and those of your friends might differ. You each perceived the same event through a different set of lenses. One might have seen the movie as an action film, another as a romance. There’s probably some element of truth in both perspectives. What’s reality for you is based on your interpretation of the event. Your reality can be shaped and impacted by learning about others’ perceptions of the same incident. For example, checking your perception with others and sharing yours with them might change your opinion of the movie or increase your understanding of it. At work, the best managers are those who augment their own perspective with the views of others. Your perceptions can—and should—change based on new inputs.

It is important to be in touch with your perceptions—what they are and how they’re being formed. Equally important is being aware of the perceptions of others. Others’ behavior toward you is heavily influenced by their understanding of the situation, and your behavior toward others is equally dependent on your assumptions about them and the situation. It is crucial to understand and disclose your own perspective as well as to solicit information from others about their understanding of the same situation.

Factors from a variety of sources may simultaneously impact your perception (see Figure 1–2). This makes it even more important to be fully aware of the factors that influence your perception. Our past experience, belief system, family background, and personal values heavily influence our perceptions of others. You can check to ensure that your own experience and perspective are not negatively distorting your perceptions of reality.

Perceptions

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12 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

As human beings, we tend to form perceptions based on our biases. If you are not aware of your biases and don’t check your understanding with others, you may miss important information and situations by relying on distorted perceptions. Some of the more common filters that can influence your perceptions are stereotyping, selective per- ception, projection, expectations, and interest. ■ Stereotyping is making assumptions about an individual or a group based on gen- eralized judgments rather than on facts. Many who stereotype others do so on the basis of observable demographic characteristics, such as race or ethnicity, gender, age, dis- ability, religion, and sexual orientation. For example, some companies are reluctant to hire older workers for certain job roles for fear that they lack the energy and stamina to perform at a desired level. Stereotyping is a convenient but faulty way to make assumptions about a person’s behavior and abilities. Rather than relying on a stereotype that is probably largely false, it is best to check your own perceptions and come to an event or meet a new person with an open mind. This will allow you to form your own perspective rather than rely on biases that have been shaped by judging and attributing certain behaviors to all members of a group. ■ Selective perception is interpreting information for meaning and accuracy, and dis- carding information that is threatening or not relevant. We are constantly bombarded with stimuli. This has always been true but even more so today, thanks to social media, online newspapers and news feeds, 24-hour cable news channels, mobile devices, instant access to Internet content, texting, and email. In an effort to reduce the breadth and impact of continuous stimuli, our brains attend to information according to our own experiences, interests, attitudes, and background. This means we are constantly “filtering”— absorbing and processing only those inputs we think we can handle, or want to handle, at any given time. For example, people tend to dislike thinking about their own mortality, so they avoid the subject of wills and funeral planning. A college student whose main con- cern is graduating is probably not likely to be thinking of retirement plans. A graduate student in finance may not pay attention to an excellent speaker who’s in marketing. A manager with a project deadline is probably not going to read information for a meeting that’s scheduled for next month.

Selective perception serves a useful purpose, but it hinders communication with oth- ers. Rather than automatically “tuning out” information with which you disagree, keep an open mind, being open to all new views about a situation before prematurely devel- oping your own opinion. (See Exercise 1–C for more on selective perception.)

Stored Information Current perceptions

External Factors

Environment Media Heredity Culture Peers Societal norms Technology Affective events

Internal Factors

Needs Intelligence Past experiences and memories Emotions Values Attitudes Biases

Figure 1–2 Factors That Affect Perceptions

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■ Projection is attributing one’s own attitudes, characteristics, or shortcomings to others. For example, someone who cheats and lies might make the assumption that everyone cheats and lies. This validates our own perceptions of the way things are, or at least the way we think things should be. However, projecting our beliefs onto others denies them the opportunity to provide us with a unique and fresh perspective. Rather than transferring your own experience and feelings to another, it is best to consider each new situation and person in your life as unique, paying attention to their features and characteristics rather than yours. ■ Expectations involve forming an opinion about how we would like an event to unfold, a situation to develop, or a person to act, think, or feel. We tend to perceive, select, and interpret information according to how we expect it to appear. For example, when proofreading a paper or report you have written, you may pass over mistakes because you know what you intended to say, so you perceive it to be correct. By under- standing what your expectations are and viewing a situation with a clean slate—minus preconceived notions about what to expect—you are better able to approach situations and people and form your own opinions based on actual experience rather than on assumptions. ■ Interest is basing our activities and inputs on things that are likeable or appealing to us. We tend to focus our time and attention—consciously or subconsciously—on those things that are enjoyable and meaningful to us. For example, if we are in the market to buy a new home we will notice “For Sale” signs in front of houses that pre- viously would have gone unnoticed. If you have an interest in people, you might focus on a career in teaching or counseling, while ignoring other subjects such as computer science. The tendency to be drawn to things that interest us can be positive, in that it helps conserve our energy for the things that matter to us. However, as you increase your own self-understanding, it is important to reach out to things that go beyond what interests you at the time. By doing this you can broaden yourself and your understand- ing of the things that are important and meaningful to others.

By understanding yourself, you can begin to change your perceptions that are often affected by the biases just described. Understand and confront your biases. By doing so, you will increase your level of self-understanding and will be more understanding of others and their perspectives. The workplace is increasingly global and diverse. Compa- nies are now involved in developing new business models. You will be better equipped to formulate and embrace these new models by expanding both your self-awareness and other-awareness. This step will help you to be a better manager and person.

A percentage of your perceptions are derived from what you attribute to the causes of behavior in yourself or others. Attribution theory demonstrates that individuals tend to decide that a behavior is caused by a particular characteristic or event.25 We make these attributions or judgments about what caused the resulting behavior based on our personal observation or evaluation of the situation. For instance, after being fired from a position, you might blame the dismissal on an internal factor or personal characteristic such as being an incompetent worker. Or you might blame the dismissal on an external factor such as a declining economy. Understanding how and why you make these attributions is important because future decisions and behaviors are based more on your perception of why some- thing happened rather than on the actual outcome.26 Therefore, we tend to reinforce our beliefs about ourselves and others based on the perceptions we gain from these experiences.

It is also important to evaluate whether these judgments are attributed more to inter- nal or external factors. Attributing outcomes to controllable factors tends to be a stron- ger indicator of future behavior than attributing them to uncontrollable factors.27 For instance, if you attribute the loss of a job to internal or controllable factors, you might feel shame, which could have one of two effects: hampering attempts to get a new posi- tion or pushing you to become a more effective employee in the future. However, if you blame the job loss on an external or uncontrollable factor, it may lead to anger. Percep- tions determine behavior in future situations based on the amount of personal control you believe you have over the situation.

Attribution Theory

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14 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Behavior and perception have an impact on your attributions. Self-serving bias causes us to overestimate internal factors for successes and blame external factors for failures. This may cause you to evaluate incorrectly your personal strengths and weaknesses. Another bias is fundamental attribution error, which causes individuals to overestimate the impact of internal factors and underestimate the influence of external factors when evaluating the behavior of others. We are more likely to judge people who lose their temper as unable to control themselves than to blame the situation. It is important to evaluate both internal and external factors before jumping to conclusions.

Increasing Your Self-awareness

■ Learn from your mistakes. ■ Ask for feedback. ■ Change your attitude. ■ Be aware of your biases. ■ Expand your interests and perspective. ■ Increase your experience base.

Self-awareness is also gained through understanding how others view us and how we are shaped by others’ opinions of us. Stephen Covey refers to this concept as the “social mirror,”28 which has its roots in Cooley’s and Mead’s work related to the con- cept of the “looking-glass self.”29 Covey explains that we gain perceptions of ourselves as a result of what other people say about us or how they react to us. We adopt a view of ourselves based on others’ views. How do others view us? How do we change our actions as a result of what we think others are thinking about us? These are the ques- tions to ask to get a handle on how we are shaped by others’ perceptions. By seeing ourselves through others’ eyes, we can learn about our strengths and also about areas in which we can improve. (See Exercise 1–D.)

Learning to read accurately how others see us enhances our “self-maps,” our images and judgments of ourselves. For example, you might say to yourself, “I’m not a creative person” or “I’m an athletic person” after hearing comments from others about your artistic or athletic ability. The social mirror is based on our memory of how others have reacted toward us or treated us. Through feedback from others we can gain more insight or perspective into aspects of ourselves and our behaviors. However, our perceptions may not be based accurately on this information. The social mirror can be wrong or only partially correct. For example, an overbearing parent might say something negative, such as “You’ll never amount to anything.” In this case, be very careful to first assess the statement—is it true? If the statement is not a reflection of reality, then work hard to dispel this image of you in your own mind, if not in the mind of the person who said it to you. Negative self-statements can be very damaging to one’s self-esteem. The social mirror is designed to help you learn about yourself, but you shouldn’t accept everything that others say to you as reality. (See Exercise 1–D for more on the social mirror.)

Another means of gaining self-awareness is through self-disclosure—sharing your thoughts, feelings, and ideas with others without self-deception, without distortion.30 Talking with others allows us to share our feelings and responses. Self-disclosing is a key factor in improving our self-awareness; we must disclose information and interact with others to further clarify our perceptions.31 Through verbalizing our perceptions, we verify our own beliefs, affirm our self-concept, and validate data received from an objec- tive source. For example, if you’ve received a low grade on an exam, it’s helpful to dis- cuss this with others. They can listen to your concerns and give you feedback. They might empathize with the fact that you’ve received a low grade, then offer to problem- solve—for instance, identifying a test-taking strategy you can use in the future. They might also remind you that in general you do well in school. This helps you to

Others’ Perceptions

Self-disclosure

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maintain perspective even while going through a hard time about the exam. See more about self-disclosure in Chapter 2.

Another way of increasing self-awareness is through acquiring multiple experiences in diverse situations and with diverse others. For example, studying or working in a coun- try other than your home country, working in a multifunctional position at your job, learning a new language, traveling, keeping up with international news outlets, reading books on new subjects, and acquiring broad work experience are ways to broaden our experience base. Even negative situations such as having to face a life-threatening ill- ness, working with a difficult boss, going through your own or your parents’ divorce, and overcoming a personal problem such as dyslexia can provide enormous learning and enhance your experience base.

As we acquire more experiences, we have both successes and failures. We can learn just as much if not more from failures. When things go wrong, assess what happened, take responsibility, and most importantly, determine how you can do better the next time. As we encounter new situations, we use skills and acquire new ones, meet people and develop friendships, see new places, and learn firsthand about things we might have only read about. Being open to new experiences broadens our horizons. It helps us to see ourselves in a new light while giving us new information about ourselves and our ability to interact with the world. This boosts our confidence level and encourages us to reach out to further our experiences even more. It makes us more open to new ideas and diverse people with varying ways of living, working, and thinking. Expanding our experience base puts us into situations that test our abilities, values, and goals. This greatly aids in increasing our level of self-awareness.

Summary Self-awareness is an essential skill for developing personally and professionally. If you have a high degree of self-awareness, you’ll be able to capitalize on your strengths and develop plans for improving or compensating for your limitations. Part of being self-aware is being able to monitor and change your behavior. By concentrating on self-improvement, you demonstrate to others your willingness to learn and grow, increasing the likelihood of being able to develop close relationships and success in both your life and career.

Key Terms and Concepts Agreeableness

Attitudes

Attribution theory

Behavior

Collectivist

Conscientiousness

Emotional stability

Expectations

Extroversion

Fundamental attribution error

Individualism

Interest

Modes of acting

Modes of interacting

Diverse Experiences

Modes of thinking

Motivation

Openness to experience

Perception

Personality

Projection

Selective perception

Self-analysis

Self-awareness

Self-disclosure

Self-monitoring

Self-serving bias

Social mirror

Stereotyping

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16 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Discussion Questions 1. What can you do to increase your levels of self-awareness in the coming year?

2. You may have heard the term “personality clash” before. What does this mean and how can this be avoided?

3. How can you respond strategically to others whose styles are different from yours?

4. What effect do you think your country of origin has on your levels of self-awareness?

5. What effect do your current age and state in life have on your levels of self-awareness?

6. How can your self-awareness inform your next career and life decisions?

Endnotes  1. Jayashree, V., “The Starting Point of Change in Individuals—An Empirical Analysis,” Journal of Contemporary Research in Management 6, no. 3 (July–September 2011), pp. 16–17.

 2. Daniel Goleman, “What Makes a Leader?” Harvard Business Review 82, no. 1 (January 2004), p. 85.

 3. Jayashree, V., “The Starting Point of Change in Individuals—An Empirical Analysis,” Journal of Contemporary Research in Management 6, no. 3 (July-September 2011), p. 14.

 4. Mark Morgan, “Leveraging Self-Awareness,” Strategic Finance 92, no. 9 (March 2011), p. 23.

 5. Addington, T. J., Comment on self-knowledge and leadership, “Leading from the Sandbox,” http://leadingfromthesandbox.blogspot.com/2012/06/self-knowledge-and-leadership.html, Monday, June 18, 2012.

 6. Peter F. Drucker, “Managing Oneself,” Harvard Business Review 83, no. 1 (2005), pp. 100–109.

 7. Craig R. Seal, Stefanie E. Naumann, Amy N. Scott, and Joanna Royce-Davis, “Social Emo- tional Development: A New Model of Student Learning in Higher Education,” Research in Higher Education Journal 10 (March 2011), p. 7.

 8. John J. Sosik, “Self–Other Agreement on Charismatic Leadership: Relationships with Work Atti- tudes and Managerial Performance,” Group & Organization Management 26, no. 4 (2001), p. 484.

 9. T. Jokinen, “Global Leadership Competencies: A Review and Discussion (electronic version),” Journal of European Industrial Training 29, p. 199. As cited in James Prewitt, Richard Weil, and Anthony McClure, “Developing Leadership in Global and Multi-Cultural Organizations,” Interna- tional Journal of Business and Social Science 2 (July 2011), p. 13.

10. S. Georgianna, “Self-leadership: A Cross Cultural Perspective,” Journal of Managerial Psychology 22, no. 6 (2007), p. 573.

11. Macaleer, William D. and Shannon, Jones B., “Emotional Intelligence: How Does It Affect Leadership?” Employment Relations Today 29, no. 3 (Autumn 2002), p. 13.

12. Patricia A. Hoffman, “The Aura of a Winner: A Guide to Behavioral Hiring,” Journal of Property Management 61, no. 5 (September–October 1996), pp. 16–20.

13. This definition is adapted from Salvatore R. Maddi, Personality Theories: A Comparative Analysis (Chicago, IL: Dorsey Press, 1989).

14. Barry M. Staw, Nancy E. Bell, and John A. Clausen, “The Dispositional Approach to Job Attitudes: A Lifetime Longitudinal Test,” Administrative Science Quarterly 31 (March 1986), pp. 56–77.

15. Murray Barrick and Michael Mount, “The Big Five Personality Dimensions and Job Perfor- mance: A Meta-analysis,” Personnel Psychology (Spring 1991), p. 11.

16. Margaret Shaffer, David Harrison, Hal Gregersen, J. Stewart Black, and Lori Ferzandi, “You Can Take It with You: Individual Differences and Expatriate Effectiveness,” Journal of Applied Psychology 91, no. 1 (January 2006), pp. 111–112.

17. Daniel Heller, Timothy A. Judge, and David Watson, “The Confounding Role of Personality and Trait Affectivity in the Relationship between Job and Life Satisfaction,” Journal of Organiza- tional Behavior 23, no. 7 (November 2002), p. 817.

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1 / Journey into Self-awareness 17

18. Kindal Shores and David Scott, “The Relationship of Individual Time Perspective and Recre- ation Experience Preferences,” Journal of Leisure Research 39, 1 (First Quarter 2007), p. 32.

19. Michael K. Mount, Murray R. Barrick, Steve M. Scullen, and James Rounds, “Higher-Order Dimensions of the Big Five Personality Traits and the Big Six Vocational Interest Types,” Person- nel Psychology 58, no. 2 (Summer 2005), p. 447.

20. Charles A. O’Reilly III, Jennifer Chatman, and David F. Caldwell, “People and Organiza- tional Culture: A Profile Comparison Approach to Assess Person Organization Fit,” Academy of Management Journal 34, no. 3 (September 1991), pp. 487–516.

21. Abram Poczter, “Attitude Development Hierarchy and Segmentation,” Review of Business 9, no. 1 (Summer 1987), p. 17.

22. Gregory R. Maio, David W. Bell, and Victoria M. Esses, “Examining Conflict between Com- ponents of Attitudes: Ambivalence and Inconsistency Are Distinct Constructs,” Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science 32 (April 2000), pp. 71–83.

23. Yanhan Zhu, “The Action Mechanism of Social Exchange Relationship Perception on Orga- nizational Citizenship Behavior: An Empirical Study in China,” International Journal of Business Administration 3, no. 2 (March 2012), p. 84.

24. Zhenzhong Ma, “Negotiating into China: The Impact of Individual Perception on Chinese Negotiation Styles,” International Journal of Emerging Markets 1, no. 1 (2006), p. 66.

25. Bernard Weiner, “Attributional Thoughts about Consumer Behavior,” Journal of Consumer Research 27, no. 3 (December 2000), pp. 382–387.

26. Jacquelynne S. Eccles and Allan Wigfield, “Motivational Beliefs, Values, and Goals,” Annual Review of Psychology 53 (2002), p. 109.

27. B. Weiner, Human Motivation: Metaphors, Theories, and Research (Newbury Park, CA: Sage, 1992).

28. Stephen R. Covey, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change (New York: Free Press, November 2004).

29. Charles Horton Cooley, Human Nature and the Social Order (New York: Scribner’s, 1902), and George H. Mead, Mind, Self, and Society: From the Standpoint of a Social Behaviorist, ed. Charles W. Morris (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1934).

30. C. R. Rogers, On Becoming a Person: A Therapist’s View of Psychotherapy (Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1961), p. 103.

31. David W. Johnson, Reaching Out: Interpersonal Effectiveness and Self-Actualization (Boston: Allyn & Bacon, 2003), pp. 57–58.

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Exercise 1–B The Big Five Personality Test

Introduction

This personality test will help you understand why you act the way you do and how your personality is structured. Please follow the instructions provided; scoring and results follow the test.

Instructions

In the table, for each statement 1–50 mark (in the box on the left) how much you agree with it on the scale 1–5, where 1 = disagree, 2 = slightly disagree, 3 = neutral, 4 = slightly agree, and 5 = agree.

Test

Rating I... Rating I...

1. Am the life of the party. 16. Keep in the background.

2. Feel little concern for others. 17. Sympathize with others’ feelings.

3. Am always prepared. 18. Make a mess of things.

4. Get stressed out easily. 19. Seldom feel blue.

5. Have a rich vocabulary. 20. Am not interested in abstract ideas.

6. Don’t talk a lot. 21. Start conversations.

7. Am interested in people. 22. Am not interested in other people’s problems.

8. Leave my belongings around. 23. Get chores done right away.

9. Am relaxed most of the time. 24. Am easily disturbed.

10. Have difficulty understanding abstract ideas.

25. Have excellent ideas.

11. Feel comfortable around people.

26. Have little to say.

12. Insult people. 27. Have a soft heart.

13. Pay attention to details. 28. Often forget to put things back in their proper place.

14. Worry about things. 29. Get upset easily.

15. Have a vivid imagination. 30. Do not have a good imagination.

Exercise 1–A Journal Writing

A good way to become self-aware and improve our reaction to situations is to keep a journal. Once a week go to a place where you won’t be interrupted and reflect on the previous week. What interpersonal situations did you face and respond to appropriately? Which ones are you happy with? Why? In which situations did you not behave effectively? Which ones didn’t accomplish the outcome you were seeking? Why? Write about two to three situations weekly, sharing your feelings, analyzing the inter- actions, acknowledging what’s working and list ways to improve future interactions. For each, describe which of your behaviors and attitudes were helpful, how your personal- ity contributed to the situation, and how your perception of the situation affected the outcome.

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Rating I... Rating I...

31. Talk to a lot of different people at parties.

41. Don’t mind being the center of attention.

32. Am not really interested in others.

42. Feel others’ emotions.

33. Like order. 43. Follow a schedule.

34. Change my mood a lot. 44. Get irritated easily.

35. Am quick to understand things. 45. Spend time reflecting on things.

36. Don’t like to draw attention to myself.

46. Am quiet around strangers.

37. Take time out for others. 47. Make people feel at ease.

38. Shirk my duties. 48. Am exacting in my work.

39. Have frequent mood swings. 49. Often feel blue.

40. Use difficult words. 50. Am full of ideas.

E = 20 + (1) - (6) + (11) - (16) + (21) - (26) + (31) - (36) + (41) - (46) =

A = 14 - (2) + (7) - (12) + (17) - (22) + (27) - (32) + (37) + (42) + (47) =

C = 14 + (3) - (8) + (13) - (18) + (23) - (28) + (33) - (38) + (43) + (48) =

N = 38 - (4) + (9) - (14) + (19) - (24) - (29) - (34) - (39) - (44) - (49) =

O = 8 + (5) - (10) + (15) - (20) + (25) - (30) + (35) + (40) + (45) + (50) =

The scores you calculate should be between 0 and 40. Following is a description of each trait.

Extroversion (E) is the personality trait of seeking fulfillment from sources outside the self or in the community. High scorers tend to be very social while low scorers prefer to work on their projects alone.

Agreeableness (A) reflects that individuals adjust their behavior to suit others. High scorers are typically polite and like people. Low scorers tend to "tell it like it is."

Conscientiousness (C) is the personality trait of being honest and hardworking. High scorers tend to follow rules and prefer clean homes. Low scorers may be messy and cheat others.

Neuroticism (N) is the personality trait of being emotional.

Openness to Experience (O) is the personality trait of seeking new experience and intellectual pursuits. High scorers may daydream a lot. Low scorers may be very down to earth.

From personality-testing.info, courtesy ipip.ori.org, http://personality-testing.info/printable/big-five-personality-test.pdf

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20 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

Exercise 1–C Selective Perception

How does selective perception affect the interpretation of what we see and hear?

Your instructor will read two scenarios. Following the reading of each situation, write in the appropriate column what you see and hear from the description (what picture comes to mind?), what judgments you make or conclusions you draw about the situa- tion, and what (if any) actions you would take.

Scenario One:

Scenario Two:

What I see/hear: My judgment: What action I would take:

1.

2.

Questions to be considered individually and discussed in small groups:

1. Why do we interpret the same scenario differently from others?

2. What impact does this have on developing relationships?

3. What if in scenario one, the person you “met” was a woman? How would your inter- pretation of the situation change?

4. What if in scenario two, the person with the daughter was her mother instead of her father? Or perhaps the discussion was between a father and his son? How would your interpretation of these situations change?

5. Why is it important to know what our biases are?

6. Let’s say it’s three years in the future. You’ve been working for a Fortune 500 firm as a member of a product development team. The meeting is about to start when a man matching the description in scenario one walks in. What’s your judgment? Why?

7. As the meeting proceeds, he’s about to open his mouth. Before he speaks, do you assume that he is credible or not credible until proven otherwise?

8. How do our biases help/hinder us in the workplace?

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Exercise 1–D The Social Mirror

To recognize the potential inaccuracy or incompleteness of the social mirror, or others’ opinions about you as a person, take a moment to reflect on how the social mirror has affected you. Use the questions as a guide. Reflect back on all aspects of your life: per- sonal (dealing with family and friends, roommates, neighbors, significant others), academic (teachers, coaches, classmates), and professional (bosses, co-workers, subordinates, men- tors) to examine what influences others have had on your self-image and other areas of importance to you (community, religion, sports, etc.).

1. What would others say about you that is generally positive?

2. What “constructive suggestions” would others offer to help you improve or change?

3. What do you most like about yourself?

4. What do you most dislike in yourself and would like to change?

5. What beliefs do you have about yourself that limit you?

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22 1 / Intrapersonal Effectiveness: Understanding Yourself

6. How might these beliefs have been created or influenced by your social mirror?

7. Since it is possible—perhaps even likely—that these weaknesses or limitations are more imagined than real, what could you do to turn them into strengths?

Source: This exercise is adapted with permission from Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Leadership Training Manual. Reprinted by permission of Franklin Covey Co.

Exercise 1–E Expanding Self-awareness

1. Identify a behavior of yours that you would like to change. Practice a different form of that behavior for one week. For example, if you constantly interrupt others, try to go a week without interrupting anyone. Keep a record of every time you change this behavior. Reward yourself at the end of the week for being conscious of the need to change. Attempt a different behavior in week two, and so on.

2. Observe a person you admire at work or in school off and on for several days. How would you describe that person’s attitude? What evidence do you have of this? What can you do to emulate his or her positive qualities?

3. Write on a sheet of paper adjectives that you wish could describe your personality. Identify some ways in which you could make changes to incorporate these qualities into your interactions with others.

4. Ask a few close friends for feedback about you as a person, your strong qualities, and areas you could change.

5. Reflect upon the last time you found yourself under a lot of pressure. How did you react? Respond? Behave? Develop a plan to help you think clearly in future situa- tions to have a more controlled and less emotional response. For example, if you usually have a physical response when you get angry, think of an alternative means to handle your anger.

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Exercise 1–F Interpersonal Skills Checklist

Developing interpersonal skills is vitally important in today’s workplace even if you are an individual contributor in the workplace. It is critical to communicate effectively with your boss, colleagues, the leadership team, and customers. However, most people do not com- municate as effectively as they could. Rate each of the following 12 interpersonal skills using a scale of 1–5, where 1 means disagree and 5 is agree. Sum your score to see how your interpersonal skills add up. If your score is 60 or lower, develop an action plan to improve your weaker interpersonal skills, which will positively affect your leadership skills and effectiveness.

Disagree Neutral Agree

1. Effective listening skills I always actively listen to both verbal and nonverbal communications of others.

1 2 3 4 5

2. Accepting responsibility I constantly take responsibility and am accountable for my decisions, actions, and behaviors.

1 2 3 4 5

3. Problem-solving ability I am competent helping others creatively solve tough problems in a calm and soothing manner.

1 2 3 4 5

4. Appropriate expression of feelings and opinions I always clearly articulate my feelings and opinions during meetings without becoming overly emotional.

1 2 3 4 5

5. Self-awareness I am continually aware of my feelings and emotions and take into account how they can affect my actions and behaviors.

1 2 3 4 5

6. Awareness of others I always appreciate others’ experiences and contributions from diverse backgrounds as well as being sensitive to how my behaviors affect others.

1 2 3 4 5

7. Acknowledge others’ achievements I continually compliment and praise others for their achieve- ments and show appreciation for others’ contributions.

1 2 3 4 5

8. Trust and integrity I always follow through on my commitments and demon- strate honesty and integrity in my actions.

1 2 3 4 5

9. Openness to feedback I continually solicit feedback from others and incorporate their suggestions to be more effective.

1 2 3 4 5

10. Accepting others’ perspectives I always empathize with and am sensitive to the needs of others, which enables me to recognize and accept different points of view.

1 2 3 4 5

11. Aligning goals I always manage my behavior during social interactions so I am able to align my goals with the goals of others.

1 2 3 4 5

12. Managing conflict I continually manage conflict effectively and strive to create win–win solutions by constructively influencing the behavior of others and using effective communication and persuasion strategies.

1 2 3 4 5

________Total Score

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Evaluation: 54–60 = Excellent interpersonal skills

47–53 = Good interpersonal skills

40–46 = Average interpersonal skills

33–39 = Weak interpersonal skills

Below 33 = Poor interpersonal skills

© 2016 VentureQuest Ltd, LLC Courtney Price, Ph.D., CEO and Founder. For over 30 years, VentureQuest has worked with corporations, entrepreneurs, universities, federal laboratories, and governmental agencies helping them develop managers and leaders, market opportunities, and commercializing new ideas. This Interpersonal Skill Checklist has been adapted from one of VentureQuest’s leadership assessment tools.

Exercise 1–G Reflection/Action Plan

This chapter focused on self-awareness—what it is, why it’s important, and how to acquire and increase the degree to which you possess it. Other elements that comprise the self, including personality, attitude, and emotional intelligence, were also discussed. Complete the following worksheet after reading all material and doing experiential activities for this chapter.

1. The one or two areas in which I am most strong are:

2. The one or two areas in which I need more improvement are:

3. If I did only one thing to improve in this area, it would be to:

4. Making this change would probably result in:

5. If I did not change or improve in this area, it would probably affect my personal and professional life in the following ways:

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