Asking for help

Asking for Help Assignment

Wanda Pena

Silberman School of Social Work

Asking for Help Assignment

Use the following questions to complete the first half of the assignment:

1. Identify and briefly describe a time in your life (e.g., childhood, adolescence, adulthood, migratory experiences) when you had to ask for help?

My daughter was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor when she was 4.5 y/o. She received chemotherapy, radiation, and stem cells transplant. All these treatments had consequences, like hearing loss (mild damage in her high frequency), and she became a slow learner. I registered her in a catholic school in kindergarten, when the school year was almost done I was told that she was going to be retained in the grade due to her poor performance, here is when I asked for help.

I contacted the social worker from the hospital who immediately connect me to a foundation who helped me through the process of looking for the appropriate school for my daughter. She was evaluated several times, by the Department of Education, and also neuropsychologist & child psychologist of the hospital. The advocate that helped during the process got my daughter everything that she needed and had the right to receive. After numerous meetings, evaluations, hearing my daughter was admitted to a magnificent school. A school that provides her all her needs and where she is happy and learning (she was very frustrated in the catholic school and every day was a struggle for her to go). I had to visit numerous schools from District 75 since there’s was no program in the school of New York City that specifically fulfill the needs of a student like my daughter that went to treatments that made her a slow learner. Those students where low functioning, with behavioral and emotional problems. That was not a good fit for my daughter since she is a very social girl, caring. An environment like this could be very difficult for her because would not let her perform well (you can search on how a child with no behavioral or emotional problems can be affected by child who are, more in school environment).

After evaluations were made and determined to create an IESP (contract in catholic schools) that stipulate that they had to provide my daughter with speech, occupational therapy, SEETS, and one to one tutoring in school. The DOE failed to provide these services that were mandatory by law, it was until March of that school year (note that school year starts in September), that they were able to send a person to provide my daughter with her services. Because of this the foundation advocate, and the law firm where able to get through a court hearing 300 hours of private tutoring for my daughter from a very good tutoring services.

2. What feelings came up for you? (e.g.., anxiety, sadness, ambivalence, etc)

I was devastated, after all she went through also have to deal with a situation like this was not easy for neither of us. Why something so simple as being in school was getting so complicated. Every year I have to go to EIP meeting to repeat myself and remind of what my daughter went through. Also, I have to attend court hearing and repeat the same story every year so the department education pays for my daughter tuition. I have to repeat this process, for something that is a lifelong condition, that will not change significantly. It made me anxious of not knowing.

3. Without naming the person you asked to help you, please identify if the helper was a family member, a friend, a counselor, or another role not listed here?

The person that I helped was a family member.

4. Power – who had the power in the exchange between you and the person you asked for help? If you held power, how did you use your power? What was your positionality? What was the other person’s positionality?

I can say that the lady from the foundation and me we both had the power, we both made a team where everything need my input as well hers; it was a 50% each. She had the knowledge and knew how the system works, and I complement that. It’s difficult to me to explain how, because obviously I took my daughter to all the evaluations, I was the one requesting anything that she needed, but guiding by her. She explained beforehand how everything was going to happen, and it went as plan. She connect me to a law firm that represented my daughter and they are still representing her. Every year the attorney goes with me to the court hearing. The DOE attorney never present a good case, they assumed because I’m Latina that I won’t assit or that I’m not well educated in order to advocate for my daught, to know my rights, and asked for what by law she deserves.

5. What were the reactions of the person when you asked for help?

When I contact the social worker from the hospital she was very empathetic with me, she immediately told me to calm down, not to get stressed, that she was going to help me, and that everything was going to be alright. That the foundation that she was going to put me in contact with were excellent, that they were dedicated to help children that undergo the process that my daughter went through, and that the foundation was very empathetic with children that had brain tumor (in case you want to add briefly what she was diagnosed with is ATRT Atypical Teratoid Rabdoid Tumor)

6. As you prepared yourself to make the request for help, what reactions were you expecting? Which reactions caused you to feel most apprehensive?

I didn’t have any idea what was going to happen, I just thought about the social worker, since she helped a lot during the treatment I just thought that she was able to help me again. I felt anxious of not knowing what to do, I was blocked, was not able to think in anything bad. I always had the feeling that my call for help was going to be positive, that she was going to help me.

7. Identify three lessons you have learned from this period of your life. Are any of the lessons related to issues of power, privilege, and oppression? How might the lessons impact your beliefs about asking for help?

· Power: I learned that as a mother I was very powerful when it comes to help my daughter to get what is appropriate to her. The process was so long and frustrated at times, you can find people in the way that are not willing to help, and that make the process very difficult just because.

· Privilege: I had the privilege of having all this help from the appropriate people. People that were very savvy and knew all the rights for a child as my daughter.

· Oppression: It was unfair how the system makes you exhausted, how they made you go everywhere, up and down to receive the services that my daughter needed. Knowing that she had to right to all the services, that no big effort was supposed to be done because her condition is a lifelong that cannot change, they still made me go through a process that was long and exhausted.

IF YOU CAN INCORPORATE POWER,PRIVILEGE AND OPPRESSION READINGS

The second half of the assignment requires you to relate lessons that you have learned thus far in the course, as well as demonstrate beginning practice behaviors. Specifically we expect you to use content that you have read during the semester to address the following questions:

1. Given what you have learned about social work practice, what would you do differently from what you experienced when you requested help? 

Considering my lessons from the experience, social workers have a role of maintaining clear borders regarding responsibility and professional integrity (Goodman D. , 2011). I have learned that experience alone may not serve as the only solution towards dealing with clients who come to a social worker for assistance. The social worker profession comprises of many issues. Many incidents have occurred which have raised pain and regret.

I think I wouldn’t do anything different, I was so lucky that the first door that I knocked was the correct one. The social worker from the hospital was the perfect person to help me, and she sure was. When it comes to doing the same thing as per my experience, I would have to compare between what is best for my daughter against my personal life. I would always look for an empathic mental and social expert such as the social worker who has enabled me to acquire the right framework to assist my daughter. I would establish a network that may have the capacity to support myself and my daughters in meeting our health needs. I suffered from stress and sleep apnea due to the many hours that I undertook to deal with issues affecting my daughter.

Despite fighting for my daughter, I was involved in a struggle of saving her life while at the same time I exposed myself to many risks. Stress is a problem for many individuals who deal with social and health challenges. Stress is also a motivator of many health problems such as blood pressure, thyroid, and diabetes. People may consume fat and high calories food content as a way to deal with their stress (Epstein, 1999). The case means developing a new habit regarding diet and exercises. I would ensure that I keep myself fit so that I have the strength and the urge to assist my child to have a positive development. I would also look for the best school that ensures the provision of specific skills to a child with the same status as mine.

2. Why would you do things differently? Be sure to document your responses with what you have learned and read. 

As I mentioned, I wouldn’t. What I can positively add to this is to spread the word to anyone to knock doors and look for help, that it may take many doors to knock, but one will be open. To inform people how the DOE can operate, and perhaps tips on what to say or do when going to this kind of office to request help, more if it's for a child, your own child. People should also focus on communicating their inner feelings and thought when they get a good social worker. Such a social worker may find it hard identifying our problems if we fail to communicate with them. Early communication about problems leads to effective handling of issues. A disorder such as the malignant tumor is sensitive and needs to be dealt with soonest. The symptoms may increase with time and this calls for any parent with such a child to continue seeking for the best social worker to avoid adverse effects.

3. What would you do that is the same as what you experienced? Why? 

As I have said, my daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She would push me to do same things as per my experience. She’s what I live for, and as a mother, I would do anything to ensure that she is living a stable life. I have experienced stress beyond unmeasurable measures with symptoms of diabetes, sleep apnea, and hypothyroidism. However, my interests in ensuring an improved mental and physical health for my daughter remains the same. I would not do anything different to keep my daughter alive. A malignant brain tumor is a serious issue that needs continuous treatment and care. It is a factor that deteriorates learning, speech, and general social interactions between a child and loved ones. Therefore, early processes to eliminate its outcomes after radiation, stem cells transplant, and chemotherapy would serve as the best strategies. Hearing loss and slow learning processes should be avoided because they affect the development of a child into becoming a responsible adult with a full functional potential to solve issues about their environments and social lives (Goodman, Vesely, Letiecq, & Cleaveland, 2017).

When it comes to initiating development of my child, I would be more sympathetic than empathetic. She is the only family I currently have as a single parent. She gives me company and makes my day feel bright. I will not want to lose any opportunity of living with her and seeing her grow to become a responsible woman.

I will involve both the Department of Education and the neurological department of the hospital to come up with a final analysis of my daughter. I will look for an empathic social worker with expertise that revolves in developing the best platform to offer a child with a decisive developmental factor. The social worker should have a diverse knowledge of dealing with children who suffer from different disorders (Lynn & Mensinga, 2015). Such a social worker may have a positive impact on the situation.

4. Based on this experience what have you learned about social work professional roles and boundaries?

I have learned several things associated with the boundaries and roles related to social work. My experience has influenced me to determine that the role of a social worker should comprise of assisting others to improve their circumstances. I would say I am lucky for acquiring a dedicated and well-versed social work in the field of dealing with children who have the same issues such as mine. When you visit some sites, you may identify some many complaints that individuals have raised about the professionalism of their social workers. Some social workers have proved themselves unprofessional in setting the required standards in their practice (Chiao & Immordino-Yang, 2013). The issues focus on confidentiality, falsification, and malfeasance among others. The concern given to professional boundaries is that it has impacts on power differentiation between clients and their professionals.

Boundary violation serves as a national and personal concern that needs elimination at all times. Lynn & Mensinga (2015) reiterates that boundaries play a significant role in ensuring that a social worker meets the needs of the client. In retrospect, violations of boundaries have a specific behavioral effect. I can still confirm that my case is something special and I would appreciate God for anyone to meet such a hardworking and dedicated social worker. A patient and the social worker should establish a relationship without intimacy, emotional dependency, and signs of altruistic gestures.

Additionally, I have learned that a good social worker does not have dual relationships with clients. The only concept of dual relationship works with my example. The concept of dual relationship focuses on the well-being of a child and that of the parent. As much as the problem may be with the child, a social worker may take charge of the situation to reduce mental pressure and anxiety on a parent. The situation may see the social worker providing double assistance to parents and their children (Adler, Lodi-Smith, Philippe, & Houle, 2016). The growth of the client becomes a central framework in providing services in the profession of social work. Individuals have to think of possible ways of understanding their workers to assist them to meet their health needs.

5. How would you recognize and manage your personal values in a manner that allows professional values to guide your practice?

When it comes to managing and recognizing my values, I have to be patient to learn and share my potential with those around me. If I do not have a listening year, it will become difficult for any professional to give me his/her attention. I may lack the needed skills and information as per how to assist my daughter. However, the situation does not make me less of a useless being. I may assist my daughter, but first I should show patience and set the right standards of behavior. I would try to base my thinking on the aspect of building strong relationships. I would put my personal opinions away for me to develop a professional relationship with those I consider essential. I have to promote equality regarding those I interact with to create a platform with the strength to support my cases.

Discrimination is a poor way of enhancing relationships. People are different based on their skin color, religion, culture, language, and political belonging. When it comes to setting personal values in the professional sector, it is important to appreciate these differences and influence development. The same issue may spread to training and capacity. Not every individual has equality concerning educational background and professional training (Carten, Siskind, Greene, & Eds., 2016). The above factor does not mean that they are under us. They may be better professionals because of their experiences and personalities. The only thing that would occur in the above case is to set professional standards that motivate respect with the persons. A personal value may focus on personality development and the use of professional speech in the workplace and social environments.

A personal value should be aligned with professional value to influence the positive development of the workplace. The alignment should also support the achievement of collaborative needs through the elimination of conflicts in any situation that requires the undertakings of a profession (DiAngelo, 2010). The role of a relationship should also be transparent and detailed to the point. Whenever a professional set a relationship, it should have an objective and meet the desired needs. The above situation eliminates conflict issues raised by misunderstandings.

6. How does your first semester understanding of the course content guide you to respond to someone whose positionality is different from yours? 

My first-semester comprehension of the course creates a framework to differentiate different personalities in the professional environment. I have the opportunity of using my strengths to denote different reactions and response of people because of the situation presented to them. The course content guides me to establish a relationship with another person based on the issues they offer to me at any particular time. Personality development and comprehension entail understanding the behavior and thinking of other individuals (Goodman, Vesely, Letiecq, & Cleaveland, 2017).

The course has already given me a deeper comprehension of this knowledge. It has assisted me to go through implications derived from data collection and interpretation. When one presents a case that requires immediate attention, it will be my role to ensure that the presented situation is considered faster than anything else (DiAngelo, 2010). If a person presents an unserious issue, it will take a simple strategy to deal with it. The course has presented a framework that enhances development in the classroom, social, and professional environment. It gives me a framework to articulate personality from a holistic perspective.

The course has ensured that I am keen on comprehending personalities and behaviors in my living environment. It involves knowing how to use relationships to influence the development of those around me. I use the skills I have learned to study my area and accommodate both strengths and weaknesses belonging to other individuals.

References

Adler, J., Lodi-Smith, J., Philippe, F., & Houle, I. (2016). The incremental validity of narrative identity in predicting well-being: A review of the field and recommendations for the future. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 20(2),, 142-175.

Carten, A., Siskind, A., Greene, M., & Eds. (2016). Strategies for Deconstructing Racism in the Health and Human Services. New York, 2016: Oxford University Press.

Chiao, J., & Immordino-Yang, M. (2013). Modularity and the cultural mind: Contributions of cultural neuroscience to cognitive theory. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 8(1), 56-61.

DiAngelo, R. (2010). Why can’t we all just be individuals?: Countering the discourse of individualism in anti-racist education. InterActions: UCLA Journal of Education and Information Studies, 6(1).

Epstein, R. (1999). Mindful practice. Jama, 282(9), 833-839.

Goodman, D. (2011). Promoting diversity and social justice: Educating people from privileged groups. Routledge: Abindon.

Goodman, R., Vesely, C., Letiecq, B., & Cleaveland, C. (2017). Trauma and resilience among refugee and undocumented immigrant women. Journal of Counseling & Development, 95(3), 309-321.

Lynn, R., & Mensinga, J. (2015). Social workers' narratives of integrating mindfulness into practice. Journal of Social Work Practice, 29(3), 255-270.