Revision

profilejackielre
annotated-Essay20320Rough20Draft.pdf

Li 1

Jackie Li

Alissa Buckley

ENGL 1A

December 7th, 2021

Educational Issues in San Francisco

All the nations in the world are making themselves stronger by enhancing the educational

worth in the society. The developing nations face many problems due to lack of resources, but

the developed nations face similar issues due to some other factors. Despite all the efforts, a few

countries are still facing issues related to education in their public schools working at city levels.

The American cities are also facing this challenge and San Francisco is one of them where the

educational issues are still prevalent. The low quality of education in public schools of San

Francisco is due to the presence of multiple factors. It can affect the students' future if careful

attention is not given. The public schools in San Francisco are badly suffering due to a lack of

planning at the governmental level and the poor quality of education is becoming a challenge

that is seen in the form of high children dropout ratio. The school dropout ratio may further

weaken the social and economic skeleton of the city in the future if it is not planned to improve

the situation of the public schools in San Francisco to bring the school dropouts back to public

schools. The challenges faced at the public schools of San Francisco are resulting in the poor

management of the resources and the students, which is giving rise to the school dropout ratio.

Still, this challenge can be managed if the government supports San Francisco by making

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
I see "lack of planning" below -- are there other factors?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Does this sentence add any new information?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
what is it?

Li 2

effective policies, and adequate resources can also be supplemented to bring all the dropouts

back to schools.

According to the claims by Moskowitz, it is established that the role of insightful

planning is mandatory to evaluate and implement the most appropriate strategies in the control of

the issues that are seen in the cities. The empowered people in the society are seen in every

sphere of life and they can take the responsibility to enhance the lives of others who are

unprivileged. The use of planning and implementation can be made to solve these challenges.

The efforts need to be made at both the individual and collective levels but the organized efforts

of the institutions and the governments are the major reasons for the effective results. There is a

need to identify the educational challenges in the world and know how they can impact the world

if their management is not done timely (Moskowitz). The educational problems in the cities can

ruin the future of these cities, and it may result in the reduction of the growth and developmental

activities that are only possible due to the increased levels of education.

Roubinov et al. claim that the low socioeconomic status of the families put a stress on the

lives of the school students. Additionally, the lack of support from the schools if teachers are not

adequately trained to manage the thoughts of these children can result in the dropout of these

children from the public schools in San Francisco. The educational problems in San Francisco

are increasing day by day because the condition of the public schools is getting worse. There is

little attention of the government that is given to enhance the quality of education in the public

schools of San Francisco. The use of teacher training programs can be initiated if the government

allocates budgets. Hence, these teachers can easily manage the stress and other disturbing factors

among the students coming to public schools. The capability of the teachers can be enhanced to

reduce the dropout ratio from the public schools.

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
This paragraph is super vague! Are you saying planning is good? Please be a lot more specific about what kind challenges, what kind of planning, what kind of efforts.
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Start paragraphs with points, not with textual evidence from your sources.
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Does Moskowitz discuss education?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Is there something in particular teachers need training in?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
What KIND of policies and resources? Without listing them all, can you give readers a more specific understanding of what you will argue.
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
In what way? Do you have evidence of this?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Edit to improve sentence focus -- throughout the whole essay. I see many instances of passive voice construction that obscures your meaning.

Li 3

The views of Andrejevic & Selwyn highlight the significance of the use of technology in

the public schools. Technology plays an integral role in the updating of the schools and facial

recognition apps are being used at majority of the private schools, but the public schools in San

Francisco are still lacking this technology. The use of technology has become a current need in

every sphere of life, and school children need to learn how to use technology. In this regard, the

best technique is to integrate technology in the classroom settings to practice and use technology

deliberately. While the concerns of agencies in San Francisco for the use of facial recognition

technology in the public schools of San Francisco are increasing, it is becoming a barrier to

implementing technological advancements in public schools. But, the public schools in San

Francisco need to integrate technology in the classrooms for the effective learning of the students

who will become satisfied with the services of the schools. The public schools lack technological

infrastructure, and if careful attention is not allotted, future generations may be suffering from

the global technological impacts. As a result of the low usage of technology in the classrooms,

the students' interest in the classrooms is seen to be reducing. The less engagement of students

may result in dropout from the school and they may also run away from the studies for lifetime.

Therefore, it is essential that technology be integrated in the classrooms because technology

embeddedness can increase motivation and engagement levels among the students.

Furthermore, the ratio of school dropouts can be controlled in the public schools at San

Francisco by including the rights and needs of the students in consideration. In this regard, they

can be given attention while designing the public health policy. The research done by Grumbach

et al. emphasizes that the public health benefits can reduce the number of dropouts if students

start finding the policies valuable and realize the worth of the public schools that are working for

the welfare of the students. In public schools of San Francisco, 35% tooth decay in the students

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Can you be more specific about what kind of technology would prevent students from dropping out of school?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
more specific
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Have you researched what teachers do to incorporate technology in the classroom? Aren't there grade-level standards regarding technology?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Are you saying students drop out of school because of tooth decay?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
At this point in an essay about the school drop out rate in SF, I would expect to have learned what that dropout rate is.
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
To do what?

Li 4

is seen and a public health policy can be initiated to cater to the needs of these students by

providing them appropriate medical and dental treatment. In the public schools, most of the

students come from low socioeconomic status and cannot even afford to go to hospitals for

medical treatment. The medical and dental care teams can visit these schools and provide

assistance and education to students suffering from tooth decay. Additionally, the improvement

in educational outcomes should not be forgotten at the government level and resources must be

allocated to improve educational conditions.

According to the Washington Post, "The Death and Life of the Great American School

System" was written by an educational historian named Diane Ravitch in 2010 and presented the

facts about the condition of the public schools in the country. The emphasis has also been given

to the movement, No Children Left Behind as a presidential approach to educational goals, but

this movement's failure worsened the educational conditions in the country. Congress was unable

to implement the appropriate and suitable kind of policies and strategies to enhance the quality of

education in the country. The status quo in the public schools is not letting them improve and

compete at the international levels. The involvement of for-profit organizations, private

institutions and similar must be reduced to decrease the impact of negative outcomes. The status

quo can be lowered and removed gradually by the consistent and continuous efforts of the U.S.

Department of Education (Strauss). The role of new and latest educational policies is the

preliminary requirement for the public schools to maintain the quality of education for the poor

in the country and to uplift them in society. If the poor in American cities become enabled to

compete with the private school students, the progress in society will be seen at a rapid rate. So,

there is a need to implement public policy that initiates the improvement processes in the

educational domains.

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
What is the legacy of this policy for schools today?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
What is wrong with the status quo-- be specific.
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
still relevant?

Li 5

The views presented by Levy highlight that public schools in America are not meeting

the standards of education and they need to be made better and improved. The article written by

Levy encompasses the interview questions made by Arne Duncan whose major goal in life was

to find out the out of school children to get them back to school. He was the Chief Executive

Officer at the Chicago Public Schools and also served for 7 years in the U.S. educational

department as the education secretary during the Obama Presidency. In a book written by

Duncan, he has explained the reasons for the failure of the educational system in America and

how public schools are lagging behind to be competitive in the educational world. In an

interview with the U.S. News, Duncan expressed his views about the reasons for the failure of

the U.S. educational system and also suggested ways to improve the conditions that can further

damage the educational world in the USA. According to him, the educational system of the USA

is still 100 years old and has not been updated to the extent to which it can work well. Only the

assembly line workers are being produced with the help of the old educational system. He added

that the nation is lagging behind because the political leaders are not serious and dedicated to

solve this issue. Duncan highlighted that he had proposed the increment in the teacher's salaries

and merit pays to enhance motivation and implement the newer policies in education during the

Obama presidency but less attention was given to his suggestions. According to him, 2/3rd

teachers are young and not trained professionally to meet the needs of educational excellence.

The role of political parties is high in educational grounds to pursue their political aims and

gains. The lack of government spending and emphasis on the youth is making the situation worse

and most of the productive youth is found to be involved in crimes. There is also a need to

counsel students who are suffering from bad company and are out of school or might not get

inspiration or proper guidance to become productive members of society. The advances made by

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
in what way?
Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
Does this align with something that is going on in SF?

Li 6

Duncan also mention the inclusion of the black and brown students to make them better parts of

the society; otherwise, the country will suffer from the high crime rates. So, equality among

different races, ethnic groups, religions, and socioeconomic groups is essential to impact society

positively and enable educational policies to be implanted in American society. The use of the

right kind of strategies will bring progress in the society where the young ones in the nation will

come forward to get themselves adorned with the jewels of education to become productive in

both the social and economic ways.

To oppose, the views by many researchers are in favor of the democratic nation where the

political leaders are devoting themselves to enhance the wellbeing of the citizens. The political

slogans are made about improving the educational and health matters in the country. In America,

every administration helps build the educational and health infrastructure because the democratic

rights of the individuals enable them to benefit from the public policy. After all, the political

agents have come into power due to the favors of the citizens. The educational reforms in the

public schools are the outcomes of the political philosophy, and leaders want the nation to

participate in the country's progress. To enable them to become productive, the educational

policies are made better and implementation is made on them (Gutmann). The views of these

researchers are made on the trust developed in the political parties and their leaders. They believe

that political leaders are trying to reduce the inequality in society and make the citizens useful by

equipping them with quality education.

On the contrary, it has also been seen that English language is the mode of education in

the public schools of San Francisco. The majority of the minority students are unable to speak in

English. The difficulty in speaking English discourages the minority students from leaving

education. Hence, the school dropout students complain about the use of language and find it

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
SFUSD has a robust ELD program. Do a high percentage of dropouts have issues with speaking English? How do you know?

Li 7

difficult to continue their studies. English language as the only medium of communication and

learning can weaken the school student ratio attending the schools. The language issues faced by

the minorities and their children are making their lives difficult. The inclusion of the minorities

by highlighting their educational needs in the policy making is necessary because it will focus on

the equality levels in the entire society (Macedo, 2017). So, the racial differences and the

disparities need to be reduced to lessen the impact of educational losses seen in the form of

school dropout ratio.

The issues related to public education can only be catered if the public policy is designed

so that it enhances the worth of the public schools in the eyes of the entire nation. These goals

can only be achieved if the federal government announces specific policies for educational

development in the country. The provision of public rights has become essential in the states of

America, but there is a lack of implementation on the federal policies. The strictness in providing

and making education easier and mandatory for everyone will benefit the entire nation. In this

regard, judicial enforcement plays a significant role and the compulsion of public education

grants success to all parts of the society (Imoukhuede). The use of judicial powers can only be

made when the political parties favour the national policies. The personal interests of the

political leaders must be separate from the political interests, which will result in productive

outcomes to facilitate the entire educational system in America.

On the whole, it has been concluded that public schools in San Francisco are not working

appropriately. The majority of the students are out of school, and the school dropout ratio is high.

The social and economic status of the students and families is low, and it cannot be improved if

the conditions of the public schools are not made better because educational excellence can bring

numerous social and economic benefits in society. The control on the school dropout ratio is

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
What does this mean? What policies are you advocating for?

Li 8

needed by bringing reforms in the public schools of San Francisco. It is mandatory to design

teacher training programs that can better handle the students who might have lost their interest in

public schools. The use of technology is also desired to be integrated into the classrooms. The

impact of technology will be seen by making students competitive and contemporary who can

compete for both at the local and global levels.

Additionally, the role of the government and political leaders can also become significant

when they get themselves involved in the betterment of society and, despite the political interests

working on society's collective good. The efforts of these influential mediums can bring many

changes in society and the condition of the public schools in San Francisco can get improved.

Effective educational policies are the preliminary goal that can enhance the parents' interest in

the educational outcomes which can help their children get the most valuable forms of education.

San Francisco is the leading city in America. It can change the country's fate, but if the public

schools face severe challenges, it might result in poor educational quality, and both the economic

and social fabric may be disturbed.

So, the schools in San Francisco must be enabled by the government to plan and

implement those strategies that are helpful in the current period and help San Francisco become

the best city that provides the best education in its public schools. The use of planning and

implementation of the educational policies will be the solution. Still, the implementation and

monitoring of the policies are also desired to find out the worth of the policies. Therefore, it

becomes known that the inclusion of all the groups, minorities, ages and ethnic groups to

strengthen the public-school policies in San Francisco becomes an essential goal to make the

public schools better than ever before.

Li 9

Works Cited

Andrejevic, Mark, and Neil Selwyn. "Facial recognition technology in schools: Critical questions

and concerns." Learning, Media and Technology 45.2 (2020): 115-128.

Grumbach, Kevin, et al. "Achieving health equity through community engagement in translating

evidence to policy: the San Francisco Health Improvement Partnership, 2010-2016."

(2017).

Gutmann, Amy. "5. Distributing Public Education in a Democracy." Democracy and the welfare

state. Princeton University Press, 2021. 107-130.

Imoukhuede, Areto A. "Enforcing the Right to Public Education." Ark. L. Rev. 72 (2019): 443.

Levy, Gabrielle. Rethinking Education in America. 27 July 2018.

https://www.usnews.com/news/the-report/articles/2018-07-27/americas-schools-arent-wo

rking-for-americas-kids. 17 November 2021.

Lynch, Matthew. "10 Reasons the U.S. Education System Is Failing." Education Week (2015).

Macedo, Donaldo. "Imperialist Desires in English-Only Language Policy." CATESOL

Journal 29.1 (2017): 81-110.

Moskowitz, Peter E. How to kill a city: Gentrification, inequality, and the fight for the

neighborhood. Hachette UK, 2017.

Alissa Buckley
64890000000001524
One of these sources comments on San Francisco, but it only seems tangentially related to education.

Li 10

Roubinov, Danielle S., et al. "Family socioeconomic status, cortisol, and physical health in early

childhood: the role of advantageous neighborhood characteristics." Psychosomatic

medicine 80.5 (2018): 492.