Week 3 Behavior & Stress Managment

Albert Ellis, Faulty Beliefs, and the ABC's of Emotions

It's true: how you think about yourself plays a big role in how stressed you feel. The good news is that most of the critical things you tell yourself (e.g., "I can't help it. It's just the way I am") simply aren't true. The other good news is that you are in good company: most people have a strong, inner critic that hovers, ready to pounce on any mistakes, faults, or imperfections that become apparent. And, still more good news: Ellis, a psychologist from the 1950s and 1960s, spend a good deal of time studying our inner critics and learning how to replace maladaptive, irrational belies with adaptive, positive ones. Your book contains a lot about Ellis's work. Learn more below as well.

"I am responsible for my attitudes, decisions, and choices!"

The idea that we are ultimately responsible for how we feel is a thread that weaves itself throughout our textbooks and course materials. The truth is that each of us has much more control over our lives than we may realize. Indeed, the most important words that we can call upon when looking for an intervention in a stressful situation may be, "I am responsible for what I think, do, and feel. I am responsible."

Our thoughts, behaviors, and decisions are based upon the foundation of our perceptions. Perceptions have deep roots in our beliefs, values, former experiences, and future hopes. Choosing between two conflicting perceptions can be difficult. For example, consider Gabe. He wants to keep his job because of the pay, the enjoyable staff, and the importance of the work he is doing. On the other hand, he finds that the long hours, his interest in other topics, and his inability to adjust to the new technology all keep him from enjoying his work. He definitely feels stressed, but the  cause of his stress is unclear to him for some time until he clarifies his perception to make a decision.

When we clarify our perceptions, the feeling of stress may be reduced and we can make decisions more clearly. Once Gabe makes a responsible decision, he feels integrity and authenticity in his actions.

Misconceptions, Faculty Belief Systems and Stress

Psychologist Albert Ellis (1913-2007) believed that much of our unhappiness is caused by faulty misconceptions in our belief systems. You can explore some of his ideas below. Do you hold any of these beliefs yourself? Does your belief in these ideas drive some of your behavior, leading to stress?

A common example of these misconceptions at work is seen in people who over-commit to work or social responsibilities because they believe that everyone must love them and they perceive being helpful as one way to get love and acceptance from others. In the long run, however, over-commitment leads to sleep deprivation, poor physical activity and nutrition, and feeling resentful of others. In other words, it leads to stress!

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Psychologist Albert Ellis believes that much unhappiness is caused by faulty misconceptions in our belief systems. As he works with distressed people, Ellis finds the following messages present. Review the messages to see if any are familiar to you:

· I must be loved and approved of by everyone.

· I must be perfectly competent, adequate, and successful.

· I have no control over my own happiness.

· My past experiences and events have determined my present life and behavior.

· There is one right and perfect solution to each of my problems.

· Dangerous or fearsome things are cause for great concerns.

· I should be dependent on others in my life.

· If my life does not work out the way I had planned, it will be terrible.

· It is easier to avoid certain difficulties and responsibilities than to face them.

· Some people are bad, wicked, and villainous.

· One should be very upset over other people's problems and disturbances.

By turning these statements around, or by changing our perceptions, life can take on a much different energy: