Project 5: Recommendation Report

Dear Abadit,

REFLECTION

You have written an essay recommending that Fidelity take steps to increase diversity. Paragraph 1 is your abstract, followed by your introduction in paragraphs 2-3. Paragraph 4 states your recommendations. Paragraphs 5-9 serve as the discussions segment of your essay. Paragraph 10 concludes by summarizing more of your recommendations.

PRAISE

DEVELOPMENT

Abadit, you did a really nice job developing your abstract and conclusion a bit more. You made a point to answer those really important questions: who, what, where, how and why.

RECOMMENDATIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

THESIS

Abadit, your thesis is almost there. Some components are present:

Once the diversity is improved, the company will enjoy enhanced decision-making, creativity, employee motivation, and productivity.

Problem: Not clear. Is it lack of diversity that is hurting the business?

Responsible Party: Name the organization in the second part of your thesis. In this case it’s Fidelity.

Solution: Name the specific solution. You say “once it is improved” but how will it be?

Why solutions are effective: This is clear.

The problem needs to be part of your thesis statement. Use the model below to plug in your information:

Since _________________________________________, Mesoraco Insurance should ___________________________ because ___________________, _____________________, _____________________, and ______________________.

RHETORICAL STRUCTURE

Abadit, your essay needs to follow the required format listed on the assignment sheet. After your introduction, the discussion segment comes next. The recommendations segment should go at the end with the conclusion. The body of your essay should deal solely with your solutions and why they are effective. You can weave this information into your body paragraphs. Refer back to the assignment sheet to restructure your essay:

I. Cover page 

(Use model provided in A Writer’s Reference.) 

II. Table of Contents 

(Use professor’s guidelines.)

III. Abstract 

(This is a summary of the Recommendation Report using APA format based on model provided in A Writer’s Reference; 150-250 words in length.)

IV. Introduction 

· Define the problem that the company needs to solve.  Include any necessary contextual or background information. 

· Describe the  real  company so the reader has a clear understanding of the organization and then define your role within (or relationship to) the organization. 

· Define the target audience for the report. 

· Describe the recommended solution (thesis statement) and the benefits the solution will provide the target audience.

V. Discussion (you may include more points in this section than those listed below) 

· Argue one point of support for thesis (clearly stated in a strong topic sentence) with cited research data that supports the point 

· Argue another point of support for thesis (clearly stated in a strong topic sentence) with cited research data that supports the point 

· Argue another point of support for thesis (clearly stated in a strong topic sentence) with cited research data that supports the point 

· Address potential opposition (in a separate paragraph or include it within particular points of the discussion)

VI. Conclusion/Recommendation 

· Emphasize the benefits of accepting the recommendation for the target audience. 

· Call to action: Describe next steps the target audience must take to implement your recommendation. 

VII. References 

(Use guidelines provided in A Writer’s Reference.)

The above format is clear and streamlined. Do not complicate the essay with additional headings. Follow the guidelines for each section. There are specific bullets you should be addressing in each section. Please cross check your draft and prioritize the headings listed in the model above.

Use this worksheet to “Para-Map” the discussion segment of your essay. You need to focus on the solutions and why they are effective:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lPdvTFHEtOPKevnhXuHxHErdMEbHPnGsDA3zm_BqFjc/edit?usp=sharing

WRAP-UP

Abadit, work hard to perfect your thesis statement. Your thesis needs to contain all 4 components. You need to refer back to the assignment sheet in order to structure your essay. Once you focus on only the necessary parts of your essay, it will become clear and concise. Good luck with your draft. As always, reach out with any questions. It was great to work with you this semester.

Best,

Liz