DB4: Why Violence?
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7_IPV_AutoPPt-1.pptxExploring & Understanding: Intimate Partner Violence
Trigger warning: We will be discussing a sensitive topic which you may have had personal experience with, and which could trigger strong emotions.
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Intimate Partner Violence (IPV)
Physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) by a current or former intimate partner.
IPV can occur between heterosexual or same-sex couples and does not require sexual intimacy.
IPV can vary in frequency and severity. It occurs on a continuum.
- CDC, 2017
Click here once you’ve read the definition. Then click anywhere after the audio.
Source:
http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/definitions.html
In this presentation, I will be defining Intimate Partner Violence using the Center for Disease Control’s definition. DQ: Why does the CDC have a definition for this?
Violence can be physical (e.g. beatings), sexual (e.g. rape), or psychological (e.g. gaslighting). Violence is not restricted to physical contact. Emotional & psychological damage is also violence.
It can occur among heterosexual or same-sex couples and does not require sexual intimacy.
IPV can vary in frequency and severity. It occurs on a continuum, ranging from one comment that may or may not damage the victim to chronic, severe beatings, manipulation and abuse.
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There are 4 main types of IPV
Physical violence
Physical violence is the intentional use of physical force.
Potential for causing harm, injury, disability, or death
May involve weapons including guns or knives
Exists on a continuum
Can absolutely be hidden.
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There are 4 main types of IPV
Physical violence
Sexual violence
Rape / penetration of victim
Victim made to penetrate someone else
Non-physically pressured unwanted penetration
Unwanted sexual contact
Non-contact unwanted sexual experiences
Comes in many varieties:
Rape / penetration of victim (completed or attempted)
Being made to penetrate someone else
Non-physically pressured unwanted penetration
Unwanted sexual contact (unwanted kissing, groping)
Non-contact unwanted sexual experiences (flashing, making victim expose, forced participation in photos/videos)
In all of these cases, consent is absent.
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Sidebar: Consent
CONSENT
Freely given – Not obtained by manipulation, threats, violence. Someone in an unbalanced power situation (i.e. someone under your authority) cannot consent. People incapacitated by drugs or alcohol cannot consent.
Reversible – It is ongoing and must be granted every time, the entire time. Can be reversed at any time. Even if you’ve done this before. Even if you’ve already started.
Informed – No deception. If someone says they’ll use a condom and they don’t, there isn’t full consent.
Enthusiastic – It’s not the absence of a no. It’s not silent, or implied. It’s a clear, definite, enthusiastic YES! It requires communication.
Specific – No vague assumptions. Includes consent for every activity.
To get consent, you need communication. If you can’t talk about what you’re going to do, then you’re not ready to do what you have planned.
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There are 4 main types of IPV
Physical violence
Sexual violence
Stalking
Stalking involves a pattern of harassing or threatening tactics that is both unwanted and causes fear or safety concerns in the victim.
Perpetrators use multiple avenues to stalk, often including technology
Statistics:
7.5 million people stalked each year in US; over 2/3 of which are women
81% of women stalked by an intimate partner were also physically assaulted
76% of women murdered by an intimate partner were stalked first
Stalking is terrifying
Totally disrupts the victim’s life; constant reminders of the perpetrator
Consider that a restraining order requires the victim to give their address
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There are 4 main types of IPV
Physical violence
Sexual violence
Stalking
Aside: how stalking is commonly framed.
Remember 2 ½ Men? Charlie’s neighbor Rose was a stalker; played for laughs. Facts:
Charlie has a restraining order against her.
He’s scared of her. We see this over and over again
Eventually, she kidnaps him & attempts to murder him
What happens to her? Nothing. What do we do? We laugh.
We say things like: “I was stalking you on Facebook” or “I’m stalking the parking lot for a good spot”
I encourage you to rethink how you use the word “stalk.” Just the way we shouldn’t use the word “rape” lightly, so too should we be thoughtful about the word “stalk” & the implications for its victims.
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There are 4 main types of IPV
Physical violence
Sexual violence
Stalking
Psychological Aggression
Psychological aggression is the use of verbal and non-verbal communication with the intent to harm another person mentally or emotionally, and/or to exert control over another person.
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Psychological aggression takes many forms and is insidious.
Expressive aggression
Coercive control
Threats of physical or sexual violence
Control of reproductive or sexual health
Exploiting victim’s vulnerability
Presenting false information to make victim doubt their own perception
Expressive aggression (e.g. name calling, humiliating)
Coercive control (limiting access to transportation, money, friends & family. Isolating the victim. [and] Excessive monitoring of whereabouts)
Threats of physical or sexual violence use words, gestures, or weapons to communicate the intent to cause harm
Control of reproductive or sexual health typically involves the refusal to wear a condom/use birth control. It includes trying to get a woman pregnant when she did not want to and coerced pregnancy termination. Poking holes condoms
Exploitation of victim’s vulnerability (e.g. immigration status, disability)
Presenting false information to the victim; mind games (e.g. gaslighting)
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Psychological aggression takes many forms and is insidious.
Expressive aggression
Coercive control
Threats of physical or sexual violence
Control of reproductive or sexual health
Exploiting victim’s vulnerability
Presenting false information to make victim doubt their own perception
1944 film: Gaslight w Ingrid Bergman
Husband attempts to convince his wife and others that she is insane. One tactic he uses is to dim their home’s gas lamps and when she asks if the lights are low, he denies it.
Gaslighting is this tactic of sowing seeds of doubt, making them question their own memory, perception or judgement.
When people claim “I never said that” but they know they did, that’s gaslighting.
When someone dismisses your concerns as when they know those are real concerns.
When someone tells you you’re crazy
What’s so insidious is that is often starts with just a comment here or there, and tends to slowly grow in frequency and intensity. It can be a slippery slope.
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Intimate Partner Violence
Physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) by a current or former intimate partner.
IPV can occur between heterosexual or same-sex couples and does not require sexual intimacy.
IPV can vary in frequency and severity. It occurs on a continuum.
- CDC, 2017
Now that you have a good understanding of what intimate partner violence is, I’d like you to consider two more questions:
Why do people DO this? Why do people abuse their intimate partners?
Why do people stay in abusive relationships?
We will discuss these two issues further, but be careful, because we often make assumptions about abusers and victims based on media portrayals rather than reality.
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