Practice Writing: The Paramedic Method 

The Paramedic Method of revision, developed by Richard Lanham, is an easy sentence-level revision method that can help you turn wordy, passive, unclear, or overly long sentences into clear and concise ones. This handout explains how to apply the method to your sentences. For more, see Lanham’s book Revising Prose.

Lanham’s directions for applying the PM to a sentence:

1. Circle the prepositions. 2. Circle (or box) the "is" forms. 3. Ask "Who is kicking whom?" 4. Put that "kicking" action into a simple (not compound) active verb. 5. Start fast - no mindless introductions.

1. Circle the prepositions. (Common prepositions: of, in, about, for, on, to, by) Constructions using prepositions can create wordiness (I sent a letter in reply to… vs. I replied); look to these areas for opportunities to revise for conciseness. You don’t have to eliminate all prepositions, just those that cause clutter.

Bill is kicked by Jim. (Five words using the preposition) Jim kicks Bill. (Three words without the preposition)

2. Circle (or box) the "is" verb forms (forms of the verb ‘be’). These verbs describe the ‘state of being’ of people or things in a sentence: be, am, is, are, was, were, being, been. They are often appropriate and necessary, either as linking verbs (He is my friend) or as helping verbs (He is going to be late). But often these verbs also create weak verbal constructions, including passive constructions that should be revised. Replace as many ‘be’ verbs with action verbs as you can, and change passive voice (is defended by) to active voice (defends).

Bill is kicked by Jim. (passive verb) Jim kicks Bill. (active verb)

Note: Meaning should always govern the verb tense and voice used in your sentence. If you are expressing a continuous action (Jim is kicking Bill over and over), use the progressive form (helping verb + -ing verb). Another example: Maggie is using the spare room while her bedroom is being repainted.

Also, using the passive voice, or not, is a style issue, not a grammatical one. Use the passive when you wish to obscure the doer of the action, or emphasize the object of the action, or in cases where the doer is unknown: Bill was kicked in the head during the scuffle. In all other cases, use active voice.

3. Ask “Who is kicking whom?” Identify what is happening in the sentence and who is doing it—the action and the doer of the action. Who’s kicking whom? Jim is kicking Bill.

4. Put that "kicking" action into a simple (not compound) action verb. Make the doer into the subject of the sentence, and express the action with a simple action verb, in active voice: Jim kicks Bill. Avoid unnecessary compound verbs: Jim proceeds to kick Bill.

5. Start fast—no mindless introductions. Avoid introductory words and phrases that aren’t necessary to your meaning: The fact of the matter is that Jim is kicking Bill. These almost never add anything crucial to a sentence; they just postpone your point and bloat your style.

Other examples: Due to the fact that, The point I wish to make is, For all intents and purposes, It is the opinion of this writer that.)

EXAMPLE OF THE PARAMEDIC REVISION METHOD

The following paragraph is cluttered with wordy and cumbersome constructions. The paramedic revision

method begins by identifying all prepositions and ‘is’ verb forms. (Prepositions are shaded; ‘is’ verbs are

underlined.)

The examples provided by Brilliant of artists performing in insulting, offensive, and scandalous ways in

order to awaken concern for their politics show that such art brings predictable reactions—something becomes

art, museums close down, and reaction sets in. Her first example, of the American flag being tread on by

viewers as part of an artistic experience, is very effective because it directly supports her claim that art exhibits

have become a highly charged focus for political activity. Not only does this example support Brilliant’s claims,

it does so effectively and clearly. Brilliant’s best example is that of the angry sheriff in Cincinnati who

attempted to close down the Robert Maplethorpe exhibit, The Perfect Moment. This example is effective in

aiding Brilliant in proving her point that censorship and control do not mix well in a democracy. The best part

about this example is the fact that a sheriff, who is no authority on art, tried to close down a whole exhibit.

Examples are supposed to provide concrete illustrations of a principle or a claim, and Brilliant fills all of these

requirements in her essay. Her examples are solid and interesting, making the essay on a whole effective in

convincing the reader of her main claim that censorship and control have no place in a democracy.

The PM identified 30 prepositions and 6 ‘is’ verbs in the 216 word paragraph above. After the potential

trouble spots were identified, the writer revised to make the writing more clear, direct, and concise. The

revised paragraph contains only 9 prepositions, 1 ‘is’ verb form, and 129 words.

Brilliant’s examples of so-called scandalously offensive performance artists show that such art awakens

predictable results—reaction sets in and museums close down. But these examples also show artists seeking to

awaken concern for their politics, a motive Brilliant defends. Her first example, of viewers who tread on the

American flag, thus experiencing Constitutionally protected action, directly supports her claim that

contemporary art focuses on political messages. Perhaps her most graphic example is the angry Cincinnati

sheriff who shut down the Robert Maplethorpe exhibit, The Perfect Moment. The example makes Briliant’s

point that censorship and control do not mix well in a democracy. No art authority, the sheriff nevertheless

exercises power over art. Combined, these examples show that art can awaken defensible political points, yet be

condemned by unthinking authorities.

[UPDATED 4-2012]