prewriting illustration
ohaybelleo
23008603_351780_williams_jc.pdf
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English 300: Advanced Composition
Illustration Prewriting Skill
Realized
100-90
Skill
Developing
89-80
Skill
Emerging
79-70
Skill Not
Shown
69-0
Thesis, Ideas, and Content
-The thesis makes a focused claim that can be
sustained in a longer essay.
-The outline/organizer provides a detailed plan
for the essay and incorporates secondary
sources to support thesis and main points.
25-23 22-20 20-18 18-5
0
Organization
-Ideas are arranged logically.
-Each proposed main point is focused on one
example and helps support the thesis statement.
25-23 23-21 20-18 18-0
References
-Provided three to five potential secondary
sources for research.
-Incorporated borrowed information from
secondary sources using parenthetical (in-text)
citation.
-Properly formatted using APA guidelines.
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Conventions
-The outline/organizer has been spell-checked
and proofread to check for errors in word choice
and typos.
-The paper is reasonably free of errors that
interfere with a reader’s ability to understand
the content.
15-13 13-11 11-9 9-0
Format
-The prewrite is developed as an outline or
graphic organizer.
- It includes all required information in a
properly formatted cover page.
10-8 8-7 7-6 6-0
Exam Number: 351780 Grade: 71 Date: 07/04/21 Instructor: JC
Instructions for Classification and/or Division Essay:
Thank you for your submission and hard work! You’re ready to move on to the formal essay. Before
you start drafting your essay, you should revise your thesis to include a generalization
or stereotype and three examples.
1. Review the exam instructions in your study materials online.
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2. Apply the feedback I’ve included above.
3. Use the same topic for your essay as you did in this prewriting. Do not switch topics.
The illustration essay is a formal essay based on this prewriting assignment.
The thesis needs to focus on proving or disproving a generalization. The focus must be on a
generalization or stereotype that is clearly identified in the thesis. The thesis statement must also
present three examples which will be used to support or disprove the generalization. These examples
should be named in the order they are discussed in the body paragraphs.
Your essay will need
An introduction with a thesis statement.
Body paragraphs with topic sentences that each focus on one example.
A conclusion that includes your paraphrased thesis.
Review the feedback I’ve provided and apply it as you work on your formal essay, which should be
1,600–1,800 words. If you have any questions as you work, don’t hesitate to let the school know.
IMPORTANT NOTICE
Along the right-hand side of your evaluated exam, you should see marginal or
"bubble" comments from your instructor. You should also see a series of highlighted
numbers in the evaluation chart identifying the rating you earned on each trait. If
you don't see this feedback, click on the "View" tab and "Print Layout" or click on
"Review" and the option "Final Showing Markup." If you still cannot see the
feedback, please contact the school for the complete evaluation.
Dear Adell, I have posted a RTN for this exam because you have submitted the incorrect format for this assignment.
Review the exam instructions in your digital study guide then upload the correct exam for evaluation. Your submission
must be in the form of a Graphic Organizer, not an essay. Below is a sample outline showing how your material should
be presented. SAMPLE Title: Career Paths for English Majors Introduction Background: Many people believe that
English majors can only be teachers, if they find jobs at all. Thesis: Contrary to what people may think, that English
majors can only be teachers, English is a versatile major that can lead to well-paying jobs in a variety of fields such as;
copywriting, marketing or in the technical fields. Body Paragraphs Example 1: English majors find jobs in writing fields,
such as technical writer, copywriter, and editor. Profita (2019) claims that English majors can put their revising, editing,
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and proofreading skills to work as social media managers, technical writers, and public relations specialists. Example 2:
English majors find jobs in technical fields. “PayScale is finding plenty of signs that humanities majors in general —and
English majors in particular—are making headway in faster-growing areas related to digital content. Among the bright
spots: content strategists ($90,500), content marketing managers ($82,100), content managers ($72,200), and web
producers ($69,900)” (Anders, 2016, para. 5). Example 3: English majors find jobs in business and marketing fields .
English majors have found lucrative jobs as advertising executives, human resources managers, employment
recruiters, and software developers (Laue, 2019). Conclusion There’s nothing wrong with loving to read and write or
wanting to become a teacher, but English majors aren't locked in to teaching. English is the perfect major for careers
that demand good communication, critical thinking, and problem -solving skills. The conclusion should name the three
examples. REFERENCES Anders, George. (2016). 14 jobs for English majors that pay at least $60,000. Forbes. Retrieved
https://www.forbes.com/sites/georgeanders/2016/10/03/14-jobs-forenglish-majors-that- pay-at-least-
60000/#68eb5c834f1d (www.forbes.c om/sites/georgeanders/2016/10/03/14- jobs-for-english-majors-that-pa y-at-
least-60000/#68eb5c834f1d) Laue, Christine. (2019). Best-paying jobs for English majors. Monster. Retrieved from
https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/bestpaying-jobs-english-majors (www.monster.com/career-
advice/article/b est-paying-jobs-english-majors) Profita, Mike. (2019). Career options to consider for English majors.
The Balance Careers. Retrieved from: https://www.thebalancecareers.com/top-jobs-for-english-majors2059642
(www.thebalancecareers.com/top-jobs-for-english-majors-20 59642) . Please include this set of instructions with your
retake submission, or there may be a problem completing your evaluation. For electronic submissions, copy and paste
them at the beginning of your retake document. As part of your file name, include “Retake” after your last name. Then
submit your retake essay for grading. Best wishes on your retake, Instructor Penn Foster College
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Title: Lawnmower Parenting Is Detrimental to The Growth and Development of Children
Introduction
Background: Lawnmower parents are considered the new breed of parents. These are parents who
insert themselves into their children's lives and become excessively involved in them. They are
determined to do all they can to remove any obstacles and resolve any challenges their children may
encounter. To do this, they micromanage their children's lives leaving little to no space for their
children to have minds of their own, make their own decisions, or experience failures that they can
learn from. These parents have the best of intentions for their children, just like many other parents.
Their goal is to shield their children from failure, adversity, discomfort, and disappointment.
Regardless of their good intentions towards their children, these parents deny their children the
opportunity to experience life in its proper form and learn vital lessons that will be helpful to them
in adulthood. The children end up living utopic lives with no pain, failure, or disappointment, only
to face the harsh realities of life they are ill-equipped to deal with. Children raised by lawnmower
parents can often translate their parents' efforts to mean that they cannot do things for themselves.
They also feel that their parents do not trust them to make decisions for themselves, leaving them
feeling helpless and insecure as they watch their peers accomplish the same tasks. Lawnmower
parenting is counterproductive because it achieves the exact opposite of what it sets out to do.
Instead of removing obstacles from the children's paths, it leaves them with more and often
insurmountable obstacles in the long run. It is also detrimental to parents because it leaves them
burnt out trying every menial task for their children and balancing that with their busy schedules.
Thesis: Despite the parents' best intentions, lawnmower parenting is detrimental to children's long-
term growth and development instead of removing obstacles.
Body Paragraphs
Commented [JC1]: https://www.verywellfamily.com/lawn mower-parenting-4771519
Lawnmower parents are the newest breed of overbearing parents who are excessively involved in their children's lives. They plow ahead—micromanaging, interfering, and arranging. Their goal is to protect them from failure, disappointment, discomfort, and adversity. But all this fixing and helping is not creating happy or healthy children. Instead, this parenting style is spawning a generation of kids who have no idea what to do when they encounter struggles. In paraphrase, the phrasing must be substantially different from the original, otherwise the material must be quoted. “Paraphrase” means to rewrite entirely in your own words and style, using none of the words, sequence of thoughts, statistics, sentence or paragraph arrangement, or other features of the original. A paraphrase must be entirely different from the original. Be careful not to fall into lagiarism.
Commented [JC2]: This is contradictory to the definition of “Lawnmower parenting.” THESIS: The thesis needs to focus on proving or disproving a generalization. The focus must be on a generalization or stereotype that is clearly identified in the thesis. The generalization or stereotype is missing. The thesis statement must also present three examples which will be used to support or disprove the generalization. The examples are missing.
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Example 1: (Gordon 2021) argues that lawnmower parenting negatively impacts the children and
the children. Parents who rely on this parenting method often do things like arguing
with their child's teachers over grades, imposing unrealistic demands on their child's
school. As witnessed recently in the 2019 college admissions bribery scandal, these
parents may be ready to break the law to ensure their children get the very best. All
these are examples of things that lawnmower parents do and are very detrimental to
the child. Further to this, these parents do not allow their children to become
independent by constantly doing things. They attempt to mow down any type of
obstacle that may get in the way of their children as they go through life (Gordon,
2021). These children grow up lacking problem-solving skills and are also unable to
make difficult decisions for themselves. As a result, they grow up as inadequate
adults who find it difficult to cope with life. Granted, lawnmower parenting aims to
give the children an easy path in life, it does the exact opposite. It leaves the children
ill-prepared for life. Parents who rely on this type of parenting need to accept that
they will not always be around to mow down all obstacles in their children's lives for
eternity. As such, the children should be adequately prepared for the eventual
certainty of when they will be expected to stand on their own feet. As adults, children
raised through lawnmower parenting end up being extraordinarily distressed and feel
that the world is against them or too complicated as they encounter obstacles for the
first time. Lawnmowing parenting does not impact the children negatively, but it also
has disadvantages for the parents. These kinds of parents often end up feeling
overworked, frustrated, and overscheduled with no time for themselves. With their
whole worlds focussed on their children's lives and fixations on what needs to be
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done to make their lives easier, they end up losing their own identities. These parents
end up being emotionally imbalanced, and this has a boomerang effect on the
children. If the parents are so stretched emotionally, they lack the emotional capacity
they need to offer their children. Emotionally strained parents may not be able to be
there for their children to the extent the children may require them to be. Often than
not, such parents have very strained relationships with their children because of their
stress levels. There is also a health risk for lawnmower parents, as they may end up
suffering from ulcers, depression, high blood pressure, and anxiety (Gordon, 2021).
Because children are born with an inherent desire for independence, the constant
micromanaging and overbearing tendencies of lawnmower parents are eventually
resented over time. Several parents who engage in lawnmowing parenting do so out
of fear that is based on their own experiences or fear of seeing their children failing
in life.
Example 2: According to (Morin, 2021) lawnmower parenting inadvertently leads to parents
surrendering some of their parenting roles in their children's lives. While lawnmower
parents will provide for the basics and necessities for their children and even indulge
them in excesses, these parents will abdicate their role as parents of molding their
children. Molding children is an integral part of parenting because it is the
responsibility of every parent to raise their children in ways that prepare them for
adulthood. By the time a child becomes legally of age to be considered as an adult, it
is expected that through their parents, they will have been prepared for the
responsibility that comes with being an adult. This also means that they will integrate
into society as responsible adults (Morin, 2021). By applying lawnmower parenting,
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parents abdicate the crucial role of preparing their children for life beyond their care
and influence. Not all of life's lessons are covered in academic curricula or within the
mainstream classroom. A lot is taught by the child's experiences and how they learn
from the outcomes of those experiences. These parents do not surrender these roles
intentionally. Lawnmower parenting makes parents abdicate their nurturing role in
various ways. Firstly, by mowing down all the obstacles that their children encounter,
these parents miss out on the opportunity to teach their children vital lessons. Lessons
such as grit and perseverance when facing challenges are missed. Lawnmower
parents also rob their children of the chance to develop solving problem skills that
can only be honed if they are allowed to experience challenges and overcome them
(Morin, 2021). However, because of the micromanaging nature of lawnmower
parenting, parents tend to either remove their children from challenging situations or
present themes with ready-made solutions. Lawnmower parents essentially rob their
children of significant opportunities to grow and develop. It has been correctly
observed that teaching someone how to fish is more productive than offering them
fish. Children raised under lawnmower parenting grow up to be lazy and lack drive
and motivation. This is primarily because, at the back of their minds, they know that
one way or the other, whatever it is that they need doing will be done by their
parents. However, as the child grows up, they begin to notice how different they are
from other children. They are able to see the independence of other children as their
parents let them become independent by making their own decisions. This makes
them resent themselves even more for not being able to do tasks that their peers can
do.
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Example 3: (Williams 2020) argues that lawnmower parenting has significant mental health
repercussions for the children and parents. Children raised by lawnmower parents
have suffered from several mental health issues right from a young age. These mental
health issues develop as the child grows up. By the time the child grows into an adult,
various deep-seated problems they experience growing up manifest as mental health
issues (Williams 2020). The nature of lawnmower parenting is one of control and
makes children feel smothered and suffocated. It also creates an atmosphere where
the relationship between parents and their children is strained. While children tend to
think that their parents do not trust them or consider them capable of having a say in
their own lives, parents may also feel that their children do not appreciate their
efforts, especially when they revolt (Williams 2020). Also, because of the emotional
strain that lawnmower parenting puts on the parents, they cannot effectively connect
with their children and pick up on issues they may be going through. Parents are
supposed to be confidants to their children. Lawnmower parents may not be able to
be confidants to their children. This atmosphere only serves to push children and
parents further apart. When the child gets to the tumultuous adolescent stage,
everything comes to a head, and usually, they begin to rebel against their parents.
Because of years of disconnect from their children, the parents are at a loss of how
best to help their children through this face. This leads to frustrated teenagers,
coupled with the fact that they were not well prepared for life, simple challenges, and
obstacles leave them feeling frustrated and stressed out. This pent-up frustration and
feeling of inadequacy can lead to panic attacks, anxiety, depression, and in some
cases, suicidal thoughts. There are numerous reported cases of spikes in pressure
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among teenagers. This is mainly because of a lack of coping skills that could not be
developed under lawnmower parenting. Eventually, these children develop a victim
and siege mentality, believing that the world is against them, and these thoughts and
feelings can manifest in violent acts. The children also lack mental strength and
acuity that would enable them to have a strong emotional quotient. Mental health is
necessary for integration into different levels of society. Children who grow into
adults that have mental health issues and challenges with emotional quotient may
struggle at the workplace or in personal relationships. Children raised by lawnmower
parents will tend to continue this vicious cycle that leads to mental health challenges
with their own children. Because of the strained relationships between children and
lawnmower parents, these children also tend to be bullies in school as they seek to
release the pressure they bottle within. The mental health and emotional issues they
face also play out in the way they relate with others.
Conclusion
Lawnmower parents tend to do a lot of harm to their children without knowing it. Example one
looks at how this method of parenting denies children the opportunity to be independent. When
parents are constantly finding ways to make their children's lives easy and smooth, the children
develop a dependence on them. Because the parents are also so heavily involved in their children's
lives through micromanagement, they can feel overwhelmed and emotionally strained. Example two
discusses how lawnmower parenting conspires to prevent the parent from playing the nurturing role
to their children. As parents attempt to secure an easy path in life for their children, they rob them of
the opportunity to learn from the experiences that life offers. This means that by the time the
children come of age, they are ill-prepared for life as adults. Example three discusses how
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lawnmower parenting can lead to several mental health issues for the children. As they grew up
shielded from the realities of life and robbed of the opportunity to develop coping skills, the children
develop several negative pent-up emotions. These emotions build up over time and lead to mental
health issues as the child advance in age and eventually becomes an adult. Overall, lawnmower
parenting does more harm than good to the children. Despite the parents' best intentions who rely on
this parenting method, in the long run, their children inevitably struggle to cope with the realities
and challenges of life.
REFERENCES
Gordon, S. (2021). What Is Lawnmower Parenting? Verywell Family.
https://www.verywellfamily.com/lawnmower-parenting-4771519.
Morin, A. (2021). 5 Ways Lawnmower Parents Hurt More Than They Help (Even Though Their
Hearts Are in the Right Place). Inc.com. https://www.inc.com/amy-morin/5-ways-
lawnmower-parents-hurt-more-than-they-help-even-though-their-hearts-are-in-right-
place.html.
Williams, C. (2020). 5 Ways Lawnmower Parents Hurt More Than They Help—psychology Today.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/202002/5-
ways-lawnmower-parents-hurt-more-they-help.
