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Visually Speaking

In the photograph above, what examples can you find of critical-thinking through reading, viewing, and writing? How does critical thinking enhance the experience of touring an art museum?

When you write something or create an image, you are sending a message into the world. When you read something or view an image, you are receiving a message. Whatever side you find yourself on, you should think critically about all elements of the rhetorical situation—the sender, message, medium, receiver, and context.

This chapter provides strategies for deepening your understanding of each element as you read, view, and write in college. By deepening your critical thinking, you’ll find that college classes become easier and much more rewarding.

Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing1

Learning Outcomes ▶ Use the SQ3R reading

strategy.

▶ Read actively. ▶ Respond to a text. ▶ Summarize a text. ▶ Actively view images. ▶ Interpret images. ▶ Evaluate images. ▶ Think critically through

writing.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Message (Subject + Purpose)

Medium (Form)

Context (Environment)

Receiver (Audience)

Sender (Creator)

Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing4

 Using the SQ3R Reading Strategy Obviously, reading a novel, a textbook, and a webpage are all different activities. Nevertheless, all college reading assignments can be approached systematically, especially when your goal is to absorb and engage the text. One strategy for critical reading, especially of information-rich texts, is called SQ3R: Survey, Question, Read, Recite, and Review. Here is how SQ3R works.

Survey The first step in SQ3R is to preview the material. Check for clues to each part of the rhetorical situation:

Rhetorical Situation

Read about the author. Then read the title and the opening and closing paragraphs to get a sense of the main points. Glance at all other pages, noting headings, topic sentences in paragraphs, boldface type, illustrations, charts, maps, and other cues to the content and organization.

Benefits: Surveying helps you (1) focus on the writer’s message, (2) identify its organization, and (3) anticipate how the text will develop.

Question As you survey, begin to ask questions that you hope to answer as you read.

■ Read any questions that accompany the reading. Look at the end of the reading or in a study guide.

■ Turn headings into questions. If a subhead says, “The Study,” ask, “How was the study conducted?”

■ Imagine test questions for major points. If the reading draws conclusions about self-control, ask, “What conclusions does the author draw about self-control?”

■ Ask the journalist’s questions: Ask who, what, where, when, why, and how? Whose attitudes are changing? What are their attitudes? Where is the change strongest? When is it occurring? Why is it happening? How?

Benefits: Asking questions keeps you actively thinking about what you are reading and helps you absorb information.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 5

Read As you encounter facts and ideas, ask these questions: What does this mean? How do the ideas relate to each other and to what I know? What’s coming next?

Keep track of your answers by taking notes, annotating the text, mapping, or outlining. (See pages 6–9 for more on these active-reading techniques.) Read difficult parts slowly; reread them if necessary. Look up unfamiliar words or ideas, and use your senses to imagine the events, people, places, or things you are reading about. Imagine talking with the writer. Express agreement, lodge complaints, ask for proof—and imagine the writer’s response or look for it in the text.

Benefits: Engaging actively with the text in this way will draw you deeper into the world of the writing. You’ll trigger memories and make surprising connections.

Recite After finishing a page, section, or chapter, recite the key points aloud. Answering Who? What? When? Where? Why? and How? questions is a quick way of testing yourself on how well you understood what you read. You can also recite the key points by listing them or writing a summary (see page 11).

Benefits: Reciting tests your comprehension, drives the material deeper into your long-term memory, and helps you connect the content with what you already know.

Review As soon as you finish reading the material, double-check the questions you posed in the “question” stage of SQ3R. Can you answer them? Glance over any notes you made as well. But don’t stop there if the reading is especially important. You will remember the material much better by spacing out your reviews; spend a few minutes reviewing each text over the next few days. Consider the following helpful memory techniques:

■ Visualize the concepts in concrete ways. Example: If a text discusses a study about self-control, imagine a television panel discussing the topic.

■ Draw diagrams or develop clusters. Example: See the cluster on page 8. ■ Put the material in your own words. Example: See the summary on page 11. ■ Teach it to someone. Example: For a study about self-control, explain the main

points to a friend or relative—in person, on the phone, or by e-mail.

■ Use acronyms or rhymes. Example: “i before e except after c.”

Benefits: Research shows that reviewing within 24 hours helps considerably to move information from your short-term memory to your long-term memory. You will also improve your memory if you create a network of associations with the information you want to remember, if you link the memory to two or more senses, or if you reorganize the material while still retaining the substance with accuracy.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing6

 Reading Actively Truly active reading is a kind of mental dialogue with the writer. Use these strategies to read actively:

■ Pace yourself. Read in stretches of thirty to forty-five minutes, followed by short breaks.

■ Anticipate. When you break, think about what is coming next and why. ■ Read difficult parts aloud. Or take turns reading aloud with a partner. ■ Take thoughtful notes. Find a note-taking system that works for you. (See pages

432–435). This is especially true for research projects.

■ Annotate the text. Mark up the text (if you own it) or a photocopy. Underline or highlight key points. Write a “?” beside puzzling parts. Write key words in the margin and add personal observations.

Read, annotate, and respond to a text. The following article first appeared in June 2, 2010, in a monthly column in the Fast Company newsletter. The author, Dan Heath, is also coauthor (with his brother) of the best-selling business books Made to Stick and Switch. He is currently a consultant to the Policy Programs at the Aspen Institute. Read the following article, using SQ3R and active-reading strategies.

Why Change Is So Hard: Self-Control Is Exhaustible

You hear something a lot about change: People won’t change because they’re too lazy. Well, I’m here to stick up for the lazy people. In fact, I want to argue that what looks like laziness is actually exhaustion. The proof comes from a psychology study that is absolutely fascinating.

The Study So picture this: Students come into a lab. It smells amazing—someone has just baked

chocolate-chip cookies. On a table in front of them, there are two bowls. One has the fresh-baked cookies. The other has a bunch of radishes. Some of the students are asked to eat some cookies but no radishes. Others are told to eat radishes but no cookies, and while they sit there, nibbling on rabbit food, the researchers leave the room—which is intended to tempt them and is frankly kind of sadistic. But in the study none of the radish-eaters slipped—they showed admirable self-control. And meanwhile, it probably goes without saying that the people gorging on cookies didn’t experience much temptation.

Then, the two groups are asked to do a second, seemingly unrelated task—basically a kind of logic puzzle where they have to trace out a complicated geometric pattern without raising their pencil. Unbeknownst to them, the puzzle can’t be solved. The scientists are

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 7

curious how long they’ll persist at a difficult task. So the cookie-eaters try again and again, for an average of 19 minutes, before they give up. But the radish-eaters—they only last an average of 8 minutes. What gives?

The Results The answer may surprise you: They ran out of self-

control. Psychologists have discovered that self-control is an exhaustible resource. And I don’t mean self-control only in the sense of turning down cookies or alcohol; I mean a broader sense of self-supervision—any time you’re paying close attention to your actions, like when you’re having a tough conversation or trying to stay focused on a paper you’re writing. This helps to explain why, after a long hard day at the office, we’re more likely to snap at our spouses or have one drink too many—we’ve depleted our self-control.

And here’s why this matters for change: In almost all change situations, you’re substituting new, unfamiliar behaviors for old, comfortable ones, and that burns self- control. Let’s say I present a new morning routine to you that specifies how you’ll shower and brush your teeth. You’ll understand it and you might even agree with my process. But to pull it off, you’ll have to supervise yourself very carefully. Every fiber of your being will want to go back to the old way of doing things. Inevitably, you’ll slip. And if I were uncharitable, I’d see you going back to the old way and I’d say, You’re so lazy. Why can’t you just change?

This brings us back to the point I promised I’d make: That what looks like laziness is often exhaustion. Change wears people out—even well-intentioned people will simply run out of fuel.

Working by yourself or with a group, answer these questions:

1. In a single sentence, state the thesis of the essay. 2. In a few sentences, tell how the findings of the study help explain why change

is difficult. 3. Compare your notes and annotations with a partner. Which parts of your

notes and annotations are the same? Which parts are different? How does discussing the content of the essay reinforce or otherwise alter your understanding of the essay?

4. Think about you own life. What sorts of activities require you to exert a great deal of self-control? What sort of activities do you find too tempting to resist when you have “run out” of self-control? How could this information help you avoid temptation?

Reading for Better Writing

Psychologists have discovered that self-control is an exhaustible resource.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing8

Map the text. If you are visually oriented, you may understand a text best by mapping out its important parts. One way to do so is by “clustering.” Start by naming the main topic in an oval at the center of the page. Then branch out using lines and “balloons,” where each balloon contains a word or phrase for one major subtopic. Branch out in further layers of balloons to show even more subpoints. If you wish, add graphics, arrows, drawings—anything that helps you visualize the relationships among ideas.

Outline the text. Outlining is the traditional way of showing all the major parts, points, and subpoints in a text. An outline uses parallel structure to show main points and subordinate points. See pages 48–50 for more on outlines.

Sample Outline for “Why Change Is So Hard: Self-Control Is Exhaustible”

lazy?

people who won’t change

exhausted?

self-control eat cookies—no need

for self-control

stuck with tracing for 19 mins more self-control?

eat radishes (no cookies)—need for much self-control

stuck with tracing 8 mins

mad about cookies?

“ran out” of self- control?

1. Introduction: Change is hard not because of laziness but because of exhaustion.

2. A study tests self-control. a. Some students must eat only cookies—using little self-control. b. Some students must eat only radishes—using much self-control. c. Both sets of students have to trace a pattern without lifting the pencil—an

unsolvable puzzle.

• Cookie-only students last an average of 19 minutes before quitting. • Radish-only students last an average of 8 minutes before quitting.

3. Results show that self-control is exhaustible. a. Avoiding temptation and working in a hard, focused way require self-

control. b. Change requires self-control. c. Failure to change often results from exhaustion of self-control.

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 9

Evaluate the text. Critical reading does not mean disproving the text or disapproving of it. It means thoughtfully inspecting, weighing, and evaluating the writer’s ideas. To strengthen your reading skills, learn to evaluate texts using the criteria below.

1. Judge the reading’s credibility. Where was it published? How reliable is the author? How current is the information? How accurate and complete does it seem to be? In addition, consider the author’s tone of voice, attitude, and apparent biases.

Discussion: Dan Heath, the author of “Why Change Is So Hard” is a New York Times best-selling author, a consultant to the Aspen Institute, and a monthly columnist for Fast Company. How do these credentials affect your reading of the article? How does the article itself build or break credibility?

2. Put the reading in a larger context. How do the text’s ideas match what you know from other sources? Which details of background, history, and social context help you understand this text’s perspective? How have things changed or remained the same since the text’s publication? Which allusions (references to people, events, and so on) does the writer use? Why?

Discussion: “Why Change Is So Hard” centers around a single psychological study and draws from it specific conclusions about self-control. What other studies have attempted to track self-control? Is this a new subdiscipline in psychological research, or a well-established one?

3. Evaluate the reasoning and support. Is the reasoning clear and logical? Are the examples and other supporting details appropriate and enlightening? Are inferences (what the text implies) consistent with the tone and message? (Look especially for hidden logic and irony that undercut what is said explicitly.)

Discussion: In “Why Change Is So Hard,” Heath identifies exhaustion of self-control as the reason for the difference between the performance of the two test groups. What other explanations could there be for the difference in performance between the two groups of subjects? Is Heath’s reasoning sound and convincing?

4. Reflect on how the reading challenges you. Which of your beliefs and values does the reading call into question? What discomfort does it create? Does your own perspective skew your evaluation?

Discussion: What self-control issues have you faced? What might this article have to say about those who work two jobs, run single-parent households, serve extended terms in war zones, or otherwise must exert superhuman levels of self-control? What social changes could help keep people from “snapping”?

For additional help evaluating texts, see pages 426–429. For information on detecting logical fallacies, which weaken writers’ arguments, see pages 257–260. fyi

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing10

 Responding to a Text In a sense, when you read a text, you enter into a dialogue with it. Your response expresses your turn in the dialogue. Such a response can take varied forms, from a journal entry to a blog to a discussion-group posting.

Follow these guidelines for response writing. On the surface, responding to a text seems perfectly natural—just let it happen. But it can be a bit more complicated. A written response typically is not the same as a private diary entry but is instead shared with other readers, whether your instructor or a class. You develop your response keeping in mind your instructor’s requirements and the response’s role in the course. Therefore, follow these guidelines:

1. Be honest. Although you want to remain sensitive to the context in which you will share your response, be bold enough to be honest about your reaction to the text—what it makes you think, feel, and question. To that end, a response usually allows you to express yourself directly using the pronoun “I.”

2. Be fluid. Let the f low of your thoughts guide you in what you write. Don’t stop to worry about grammar, punctuation, mechanics, and spelling. These can be quickly cleaned up before you share or submit your response.

3. Be reflective. Generally, the goal of a response is to offer thoughtful ref lection as opposed to knee-jerk reaction. Show, then, that you are engaging the text’s ideas, relating them to your own experience, looking both inward and outward. Avoid a shallow reaction that comes from skimming the text or misreading it.

4. Be selective. By nature, a response must limit its focus; it cannot exhaust all your reactions to the text. So zero in on one or two elements of your response, and run with those to see where they take you in your dialogue with the text.

Sample Response

Here is part of a student’s response to Dan Heath’s “Why Change Is So Hard” on pages 6–7. Note the informality and explanatory tone.

Heath’s report of the psychological experiment is very vivid, referring to the smell of chocolate-chip cookies and hungry students “gorging” on them. He uses the term “sadistic” to refer to making the radish-eaters sit and watch this go on. I wonder if this mild torment plays into the student’s readiness to give up on the later test. If I’d been rewarded with cookies, I’d feel indebted to the testers and would stick with it longer. If I’d been punished with radishes, I might give up sooner just to spite the testers. Now that I think of it, the digestion of all that sugar and fat in the cookies, as opposed to the digestion of roughage from the radishes, might also affect concentration and performance. Maybe the sugar “high” gives students the focus to keep going?

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 11

 Summarizing a Text Writing a summary disciplines you by making you pull only essentials from a reading—the main points, the thread of the argument. By doing so, you create a brief record of the text’s contents and exercise your ability to comprehend, analyze, and synthesize.

Use these guidelines for summary writing. Writing a summary requires sifting out the least important points, sorting the essential ones to show their relationships, and stating those points in your own words. Follow these guidelines:

1. Skim first; then read closely. First, get a sense of the whole, including the main idea and strategies for support. Then read carefully, taking notes as you do.

2. Capture the text’s argument. Review your notes and annotations, looking for main points and clear connections. State these brief ly and clearly, in your own words. Include only what is essential, excluding most examples and details. Don’t say simply that the text talks about its subject; tell what it says about that subject.

3. Test your summary. Aim to objectively provide the heart of the text; avoid interjecting your own opinions and presence as a writer. Don’t confuse an objective summary of a text with a response to it (shown on the previous page). Check your summary against the original text for accuracy and consistency.

Sample Summary

Below is a student’s summary of Dan Heath’s “Why Change Is So Hard,” on pages 6–7. Note how the summary writer includes only main points and phrases them in her own words. She departs from the precise order of details, but records them accurately.

In the article “Why Change Is So Hard,” Dan Heath argues that people who have trouble changing are not lazy, but have simply exhausted their self-control. Heath refers to a study in which one group of students was asked to eat cookies and not radishes while another group in the same room was asked to eat radishes and not cookies. Afterward, both groups of students were asked to trace an endless geometric design without lifting their pencils. The cookie-only group traced on average 19 minutes before giving up, but the radish-only group traced on average only 8 minutes. They had already used up their self-control. Heath says that any behavioral change requires self-control, an exhaustible resource. Reverting to old behavior is what happens due not to laziness but to exhaustion.

InSIght: Writing formal summaries—whether as part of literature reviews or as abstracts—is an important skill, especially in the social and natural sciences. For help, go to www.thecollegewriter.com/4e.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing12

 Critical Thinking Through Viewing Images are created to communicate, just as words are. Most images in everyday life are made to communicate very quickly—magazine covers, ads, signs, movie trailers, and so forth. Other images require contemplation, such as the Mona Lisa. When you view an image, view actively and critically.

Actively view images.

Survey the image. See the image as a whole so that you can absorb its overall idea. Look for the image’s focal point—what your eye is drawn to. Also consider the relationship between the image’s foreground and background, its left content and right content, and its various colors.

Inspect the image. Let your sight touch every part of the image, as if you were reading Braille. Hints of its meaning may lurk in the tiny details as well as in the relationship between the image’s parts.

Question the image. Think in terms of each part of the rhetorical situation. ■ Sender: Who created the image? Why did the person create it? ■ Message: What is the subject of the image? What is the purpose? ■ Medium: How was the image originally shown? How is it currently shown? ■ Receiver: Who is the intended viewer? Why are you viewing the image? ■ Context: When and where did the image first appear? When and where does it

appear now? How does the image relate to its context?

Understand the purpose. Different images have different purposes. Ask yourself, “What is this image meant to do?” and then decide on an appropriate response:

■ Arouse curiosity? Open your imagination, but stay on guard. ■ Entertain? Look for the pleasure or the joke, but be wary of excess or of

ethically questionable material in the image. ■ Inform or educate? Search for key instruction, noting what’s left out. ■ Illustrate? Relate the image to the words or concept being illustrated:

Does the image clarify or distort the meaning? ■ Persuade? Examine how the image appeals to the viewer’s needs, from safety

and satisfaction to self-worth. Are the appeals manipulative, clichéd, or fallacious? Do they play on emotions to bypass reason?

■ Summarize? Look for the essential message in the image: Does that main idea correspond with the written text?

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 13

the use of minors as miners is no minor problem.

View an image.

Discussion

The illustration and caption above by Chris Krenzke effectively combine humor with instruction. Originally published in a high school writing handbook, the image’s aim is to teach students about a specific word-usage problem while also entertaining them. The image is line art in the “comic” genre, using a humorous scene to convey a serious message. Here are some thoughts on how you might actively view this image:

1. Survey. The image tells a story of heavily burdened children working under the heavy supervision of an authoritarian male. That story moves from left to right, from breaking rocks to loading rocks to carrying rocks toward a likely distant destination, the destination pointed to by the man. The black-and-white medium accentuates the starkness.

2. Inspect. In terms of the illustration’s details, each figure is striking. The individual children share a thinness in their bodies and a strain in their faces. The four children in the line are pictured as beasts of burden bent over by bags that dwarf them. The repetition of figures emphasizes the trudging repetition of their work, and each child in line is pressed farther toward the ground. As for the man, his back is straight and his posture tall. His enormous chin, large nose, overly long but skinny arm, and sharply pointed finger suggest a negative authority. His stubbly face and his caveman clothing add to this figure’s prehistoric character.

3. Question. Who is the artist Chris Krenzke? When did he first create this image? In what book was it published? When? Why did Krenzke use this caveman style? Who or what do “minors,” “miners,” and “minor” refer to in the illustration?

4. Relate. The connection between the sentence and the image becomes clear when the viewer realizes that “minors” are children not of a legal age to work, “miners” refers to an occupation, and “minor” means insignificant. But the image prompts other connections: the history of horrific child-labor practices during the Industrial Revolution as well as continuing child-labor issues in today’s global economy. With these allusions, Krenzke succeeds in deepening the instruction offered by his art.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing14

 Interpreting an Image Interpreting an image follows naturally from viewing or “reading” the image. Interpreting means figuring out what the image or design is meant to do, say, or show. Interpreting requires you to think more deeply about each element of the rhetorical situation, and complications with each element.

Message

Medium

Context

ReceiverSender

■ Sender: Who created the image—a photographer, a painter, a web designer? Why did the person create it? What other people might have been involved—editors, patrons?

Complications: The sender might be unknown or a group.

■ Message: What is the subject of the image? How is the subject portrayed? What is the main purpose of the image—to entertain, to inform, to persuade, to entice, to shock?

Complications: The message might be mixed, implied, ironic, unwelcome, or distorted. The subject might be vague, unfamiliar, complex, or disturbing.

■ Medium: What is the image—a painting, a cartoon panel, a photo? How might the image have been modified over time? What visual language has the sender used?

Complications: The medium might be unusual, unfamiliar, or multiple. The visual languages might be literal, stylized, numeric, symbolic, and so on.

■ Receiver: Whom was the image made for? Are you part of the intended audience? What is your relationship with the sender? Do you agree with the message? How comfortable are you with the medium? What is your overall response to the image?

Complications: You might be uninterested in, unfamiliar with, or biased toward the message.

■ Context: What was the context in which the image was first presented? What context surrounds the image now? Does the image fit its context or fight it?

Complications: The context might be disconnected, ironic, changing, or multilayered.

InSIght: Like words, visuals can be clichés—trite, misleading, or worn-out expressions of concepts or ideas. For example, TV ads for weight-loss drugs commonly picture scantily clad, fit young people, deceptively linking use of the drug to beauty, youth, and sex.

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 15

Interpret an image.

Discussion

This color photograph shows a multireligious commemoration of the 229,000 victims of the Indian Ocean tsunami of December 26, 2004.

The symbolism is clearly rooted in the points of light created by the candle balloons, where light itself is a cross-cultural symbol of hope, endurance, the human spirit, and God’s presence. The skyward angle of the photograph, with the clusters of candle balloons floating up and the people in the lower right of the frame, creates this sense of vertical longing and release, emphasizing perhaps humanity’s longing to solve life’s mysteries, including death and disaster. Although the large, just-released candle balloons are most prominent, the viewer’s eyes are also drawn upward, where clusters of far-off candles become constellations of starlike lights. The mourners in the right of the frame, forming a loose circle, are all gazing skyward, like the viewer. Ordinary people in ordinary clothes, they appear to be clapping and, for some, the clapping shows their hands virtually in a posture of prayer. In this way, the image both mourns the dead and celebrates life.

Sender: Photographer Bazuki Muhammad; authors of The College Writer

Message: Thais release candle balloons during a mass prayer for victims of the Indian Ocean tsunami. The message is to remember those who died, but move forward with hope.

Medium: Digital color photograph

Receiver: The intended viewer was anyone reading a newspaper, magazine, or web article. The current viewer is likely a student or an instructor in a composition course.

Context: This photograph was part of a series provided by Reuters for global newspapers. It now is part of a composition text.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing16

 Evaluating an Image When you encounter an image, you must do more than understand and interpret it: You must assess its quality, truthfulness, and value. In other words, you must evaluate it. When you have done that well, you can fairly say you have thought it through. The following questions will guide your assessment.

Consider the purpose. What purpose does the visual image best seem to serve?

■ Ornamentation: Makes the page more pleasing to the eye ■ Illustration: Supports points made in the accompanying text ■ Revelation: Gives an inside look at something or presents new data ■ Explanation: Uses imagery or graphics to clarify a complex subject ■ Instruction: Guides the viewer through a complex process ■ Persuasion: Inf luences feelings or beliefs ■ Entertainment: Amuses the reader

Evaluate the quality. Essentially, how good is the image?

■ Is the image done with skill? A map, for example, should be accurately and attractively drawn, should use color effectively, and should be complete enough to serve its purpose.

■ Does the image measure up to standards of quality? See www.thecollegewriter. com/4e for design tips for a variety of visuals.

■ Is it backed by authority? Does the designer have a good reputation? Does the publication or institution have good credentials?

■ How does the image compare to other images like it? Are clearer or more accurate images available?

■ What are its shortcomings? Are there gaps in its coverage? Does it twist the evidence? Does it convey clichéd or fallacious information? (See pages 257–260 for a discussion of logical fallacies.)

■ Could you think of a better way to approach the image’s subject? If you were to produce the visual, what might you improve?

Determine the value. What is the image’s tangible and intangible worth? Its benefits and drawbacks?

■ Is the visual worth viewing? Does it enrich the document by clarifying or otherwise enhancing its message?

■ Does the visual appeal to you? Listen to authorities and peers, but also consider your own perspective.

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 17

Evaluate an image.

Discussion

Evaluating an image such as this WWII poster aimed at U.S. servicemen reveals its strong stereotypes of both men and women, stereotypes related to the historical period. As with all images, evaluation begins with understanding and interpreting the poster.

In the poster’s center is a woman in evening dress, her hair done up, wearing jewels and a corsage. She is seated, at ease, looking at us. Perhaps she represents beauty, both sensual attractiveness and sophistication. The colors used to present her are pale and muted, except for her blue eyes and red lips.

Surrounding the woman are three men, individually dressed in the uniforms of Army, Air Force, and Navy. Drinking and smoking, the men seem to be competing for her attention.

The poster implies that all service personnel were male, which was not true even in WWII, when WACs and WAVEs served in the armed forces. It cautions that these male members of the armed forces should be wary in seemingly innocent social situations, since even a beautiful woman, whom popular stereotypes of the day characterized as “dumb,” might not be what she appears. Such a woman might, in fact, be a spy—an idea perhaps inspired by the famous case of WWI spy Mata Hari. The statement that “careless talk costs lives” is a version of another common phrase from the period: “Loose lips sink ships.”

Evaluating this poster involves considering its original context while assessing it from our current perspective. In the heat of WWII, this poster could be considered a fair piece of military persuasion. Today, however, what is striking are the gender stereotypes at work in both image and words. Not only are service personnel today both male and female, in every branch of the armed forces, but they fulfill the same roles, including combat positions. With respect to the men, the image implies that in social situations (which are assumed to include smoking and drinking), they are untrustworthy and apt to boast or compete in the presence of an attractive woman. With respect to women, the image both denounces and warns, implying that women, especially attractive women, are cunning and dangerous. Today, such stereotypes press us to question the quality, truthfulness, and value of the image.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing18

 Critical Thinking Through Writing In college, your writing often must show your ability to think critically about topics and issues by analyzing complex processes, synthesizing distinct concepts, weighing the value of opposing perspectives, and practicing new applications of existing principles. The following tips can help you.

Develop sound critical-thinking habits. Like everything worthwhile, improving your critical-thinking skills takes time and practice. But cultivating the habits below will pay off in sound, thoughtful writing.

1. Be curious. Ask “Why?” Cultivate your ability to wonder; question what you see, hear, and read—both inside and outside the classroom.

2. Be creative. Don’t settle for obvious answers. Look at things in a fresh way, asking “what-if ” questions such as “What if Ophelia didn’t die in Hamlet?”

3. Be open to new ideas. Approach thinking as you would approach a road trip— looking for the unexpected and musing over mysteries.

4. Value others’ points of view. Look at issues from another person’s perspective and weigh that against your own. Honestly examine how the core of her or his perspective compares to the core of your perspective, and how each basis for thought might lead to different conclusions.

5. Get involved. Read books, journals, and newspapers. Watch documentaries. Join book clubs, film clubs, or political and social-action activities.

6. Focus. Sharpen your concentration, looking for details that distinguish a topic and reveal key questions related to its nature, function, and impact.

7. Be rational. Choose logical thinking patterns like those discussed in this chapter, and then work through the steps to deepen your understanding of a topic.

8. Make connections. Use writing to explore how and why topics or issues are related. Use comparisons to identify and name these relationships.

9. Tolerate ambiguity. Respectfully analyze issues not readily resolved—and acknowledge when your position requires further research or thought.

10. Test the evidence. Be properly skeptical about all claims (see pages 252–253). Look for corroboration (or verification) in other sources.

11. Develop research-based conclusions. Focus on understanding issues, assessing their history, development, function, and impact. During the process, gather details that lead to and support a reasonable conclusion.

12. Expect results. Consider each paper to be a benchmark that ref lects your progress in developing your thinking and writing skills. Save your papers for periodic analyses of your progress and revision of the writing.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 19

Ask probing questions. Every field uses questions to trigger critical thinking. For example, scientific questions generate hypotheses, sociological questions lead to studies, mathematical questions call for proofs, and literary criticism questions call for interpretations. A good question opens up a problem and guides you all the way to its solution. But not all questions are created equal. Consider the differences:

■ “Rhetorical” questions aren’t meant to be answered. They’re asked for effect. Example: Who would want to be caught in an earthquake?

■ Closed questions seek a limited response and can be answered with “yes,” “no,” or a simple fact. Example: Would I feel an earthquake measuring 3.0 on the Richter scale?

■ Open questions invite brainstorming and discussion. Example: How might a major earthquake affect this urban area?

■ Theoretical questions call for organization and explanation of an entire field of knowledge. Example: What might cause a sudden fracturing of Earth’s crust along fault lines?

To improve the critical thinking in your writing, ask better questions. The strategies below will help you think freely, respond to reading, study for a test, or collect your thoughts for an essay.

Ask open questions. Closed questions sometimes choke off thinking. Use open questions to trigger a flow of ideas.

Ask “educated” questions. Compare these questions: (A) What’s wrong with television? (B) Does the 16.3 percent rise in televised acts of violence during the past three years signal a rising tolerance for violence in the viewing audience? You have a better chance of expanding the “educated” question—question B—into an essay because the question is clearer and suggests debatable issues.

Keep a question journal. Divide a blank notebook page or split a computer screen. On one side, write down any questions that come to mind regarding the topic that you want to explore. On the other side, write down answers and any thoughts that flow from them.

Write Q & A drafts. To write a thoughtful first draft, write quickly, then look it over. Turn the main idea into a question and write again, answering your question. For example, if your main idea is that TV viewers watch far more violence than they did ten years ago, ask Which viewers? Why? and What’s the result? Go on that way until you find a key idea to serve as the main point of your next draft.

For more help with critical-thinking skills such as making and supporting claims, recognizing logical fallacies, and dealing with opposition, see “Strategies for Argumentation and Persuasion,” pages 249–264.

fyi

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing20

Practice inductive and deductive logic. Questions invite thinking; reasoning responds to that challenge in an organized way. Will the organization of your thoughts be inductive or deductive? Inductive logic reasons from specific information toward general conclusions. Deductive logic reasons from general principles toward specific applications. Notice in the diagram below that inductive reasoning starts with specific details or observations (as shown at the base) and then moves “up” to broader ideas and eventually to a concluding generalization. In contrast, deduction starts with general principles at the top and works down, applying the principles to explain particular instances.

Sentences, paragraphs, and entire essays can be organized either inductively or deductively. Use induction when you want to postpone your conclusions. Use deduction for logical clarity, directness, and strength, or to apply what is already agreed on to what is still under dispute. Narrative or personal essays tend toward inductive organization, whereas analytical essays (particularly those written in the social or natural sciences) typically use both induction and deduction.

Example: Read through the paragraphs below from the student essay “If We Are What We Wear, What Are We?” by Allison Young (www.thecollegewriter.com/4e). The first paragraph works deductively, the second paragraph inductively. Note how each approach affects the message.

Generalization/Conclusion

Main Ideas

Specific Details

In d

u ct

io n

D ed

u ct

io n

The American excuse for owning multiples is that clothing styles change so rapidly. At the end of the ’80s, trends in high fashion changed every two and a half months (During 95). Even for those of us who don’t keep up with high fashion, styles change often enough that our clothing itself lasts much longer than the current trend. Perhaps this is one of the reasons the average American spent $997 on clothing in 1996 (U.S. Department of Commerce).

While Americans are spending a thousand dollars on clothing a year, people in Ethiopia make an average of only $96 a year, those in Bangladesh $280, and the average Filipino worker makes $1,052 (United Nations Statistics Division). I, on the other hand, made over $5,000 last year, and that job was only part-time. When an American college student can earn more money at her part-time job than three billion people each make for a living, it’s time to question our culture and ask, as Alan During did, “How much is enough?”

Deduction: generalization to specific details

Induction: specific details to generalization

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 21

 Practicing Modes of Thinking in Your Writing In your various writing assignments, you will need to practice specific modes of thinking. The table below maps out these modes (from elementary to complex) and the tasks each requires. The more complex modes are then fleshed out on the following pages.

When you are asked to , be ready to .

Know Call to mind what you have learned

define memorize identify name list recall match recognize

■ Recall information ■ List details ■ Define key terms ■ Identify main points

Understand Show what you have learned

comprehend interpret connect restate explain summarize grasp

■ Connect related examples ■ Summarize important details ■ Explain how something works ■ Interpret what something means

Analyze Break down information

characterize contrast classify divide compare examine

■ Divide a whole into its parts ■ Group things into categories ■ Analyze causes and effects ■ Examine similarities and differences

Synthesize Shape information into a new form

assemble imagine combine invent construct link formulate

■ Bring together a body of evidence ■ Blend the old with the new ■ Predict or hypothesize ■ Construct a new way of looking at something

Evaluate Determine the worth of information

assess measure check monitor critique rank judge rate

■ Point out a subject’s strengths and weaknesses ■ Evaluate its clarity, accuracy, logic, value, and

so on ■ Convince others of its value/worth

Apply Use what you have learned

anticipate propose choose select generate

■ Propose a better way of doing something ■ Generate a plan of action ■ Offer solutions to a problem

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing22

Think by using analysis. The word analyze literally means “to loosen or undo.” When you analyze something, you break it down into parts and examine each part separately. You classify information, compare objects, trace a process, or explain causes.

As you analyze, think about the questions listed below. Note that each type of thinking answers certain kinds of questions. Remember, too, that thinking tasks often require two or more kinds of analysis that support one another.

Example: Read through the passage below, from “Wayward Cells.” In the full essay on pages 217–218, student writer Kerri Mertz explains the process by which healthy body cells become cancerous cells. Note how in this excerpt, the writer develops an overall analysis based on a process but also uses compare-contrast and cause-effect thinking within that structure, as well as informal definition.

Composition: What elements does it contain? What is not part of it?

Categories: How are things grouped, divided, or classified?

Structures: What are the parts or elements? How are they related?

Comparisons/ contrasts: How are things similar? How are they different?

Causes/effects: Why did this happen? What are the results?

Processes: How does it work or happen? What are the stages?

Most healthy cells reproduce rather quickly, but their reproduction rate is controlled. For example, your blood cells completely die off and replace themselves within a matter of weeks, but existing cells make only as many new cells as the body needs. The DNA codes in healthy cells tell them how many new cells to produce. However, cancer cells don’t have this control, so they reproduce quickly with no stopping point, a characteristic called “autonomy” (Braun 3). What’s more, all their “offspring” have the same qualities as their messed-up parent, and the resulting overpopulation produces growths called tumors.

Tumor cells can hurt the body in a number of ways. First, a tumor can grow so big that it takes up space needed by other organs. Second, some cells may detach from the original tumor and spread throughout the body, creating new tumors elsewhere. This happens with lymphatic cancer—a cancer that’s hard to control because it spreads so quickly. A third way that tumor cells can hurt the body is by doing work not called for in their DNA. For example, a gland cell’s DNA code may tell the cell to produce a necessary hormone in the endocrine system. However, if cancer damages or distorts that code, sick cells may produce more of the hormone than the body can use—or even tolerate (Braun 4). Cancer cells seem to have minds of their own, and this is why cancer is such a serious disease.

The writer explains a cellular process and contrasts healthy and cancerous versions.

The writer explains the three harmful effects of tumor cells (the cause).

Examples illustrate the analysis.

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 23

Applying: What can I do with both? What will be the outcome?

Bridging: How can I build a connection between the two?

Combining: How can I connect, associate, or blend the two?

Conflicting: Which is good, better, or best? What strength does each offer the other?

Inventing: What parts could these two play in a drama?

Proposing: What do I suggest doing with both?

Sequencing: Which comes first? Is one an extension of the other?

Projecting: Based on current information, what is the best forecast for what will happen in the near future or the long term?

Because this crisis is different from past famines, we must look beyond relief measures of the past. Merely shipping in food is not enough. Our effort will have to combine food assistance and new approaches to farming with treatment and prevention of H.I.V. and AIDS. It will require creating early-warning and analysis systems that monitor both H.I.V. infection rates and famine indicators. It will require new agricultural techniques, appropriate to a depleted work force. It will require a renewed effort to wipe out H.I.V.-related stigma and silence.

It will require innovative, large-scale ways to care for orphans, with specific measures that enable children in AIDS-affected communities to stay in school. Education and prevention are still the most powerful weapons against the spread of H.I.V. Above all, this new international effort must put women at the center of our strategy to fight AIDS.

Think by using synthesis. Synthesis is the opposite of analysis. Where analysis breaks things down into parts, synthesis combines elements into a new whole. In your writing, when you pull together things that are normally separate, you are synthesizing. Common ways of synthesizing include predicting, inventing, redesigning, and imagining a whole new way of looking at something.

Working with synthesis involves both reason and imagination. Start by looking closely at two or more items that you want to synthesize, and then think of fresh ways they can be related. Don’t be afraid to see your subjects in a new way. In other words, think “sideways” rather than straight ahead. Ask the following questions:

Example: Read through the passage below, from “In Africa, AIDS Has a Woman’s Face,” by former United Nations Secretary-General Kofi Annan (see pages 296–297). In the full article, Annan argues that resolving the AIDS crisis in Africa must begin by saving the familial, social, and economic backbones of African cultures—women. In the following passage, Annan synthesizes his discussion by projecting what is necessary for successful solutions.

Pulling together his discussion of the twin tragedies of AIDS and famine in Africa, the writer calls for imaginative, multifaceted solutions.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing24

Think by using evaluation. Movies, proposals, arguments—anything can be evaluated. Evaluation measures the value or worth of things. For example, when you express your judgment about an issue or discuss the weak and strong points of what someone else has said, you are evaluating. Many kinds of writing are evaluative.

To evaluate a topic, start by learning as much about it as possible. Then consider which criteria or standards are appropriate. Next, judge how the topic measures up based on those criteria. Support your judgment with concrete details, examples, illustrations, and comparisons. Ask questions like these:

Example: The passage below is taken from David Blankenhorn’s “Fatherless America,” on pages 279–283. In the full essay, Blankenhorn examines the causes and effects of the increased fatherlessness within U.S. families—that is, the absence of fathers in many homes. In the following excerpt, he assesses the failures of a society that is losing a healthy sense of fatherhood.

Aspects: What elements of the topic will I evaluate?

Vantage point: What are my experience and my point of view?

Criteria: On which standards will I base my judgment?

Assessment: How does the topic measure up by those standards?

Comparison: How does it compare to and contrast with similar things?

Recommendation: Based on my evaluation, what do I advise?

. . . Margaret Mead and others have observed that the supreme test of any civilization is whether it can socialize men by teaching them to be fathers—creating a culture in which men acknowledge their paternity and willingly nurture their offspring. Indeed, if we can equate the essence of the antisocial male with violence, we can equate the essence of the socialized male with being a good father. Thus, at the center of our most important cultural imperative, we find the fatherhood script: the story that describes what it ought to mean for a man to have a child. . . .

The stakes on this issue could hardly be higher. Our society’s conspicuous failure to sustain or create compelling norms of fatherhood amounts to a social and personal disaster. Today’s story of fatherhood features one-dimensional characters, an unbelievable plot, and an unhappy ending. It reveals in our society both a failure of collective memory and a collapse of moral imagination. It undermines families, neglects children, causes or aggravates our worst social problems, and makes individual adult happiness—both male and female—harder to achieve.

Ultimately, this failure reflects nothing less than a culture gone awry: a culture increasingly unable to establish the boundaries, erect the sign-posts, and fashion the stories that can harmonize individual happiness with collective well-being. In short, it reflects a culture that increasingly fails to “enculture” individual men and women, mothers and fathers.

The writer establishes a criterion for evaluating a culture’s fatherhood models and practices.

After exploring this criterion in depth (not shown), the writer measures U.S. culture and assesses its failures with respect to fatherhood.

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Chapter 1 Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing 25

When applying ideas, let questions like these guide your writing:

Purpose: What is something designed to be or do?

Benefits: What would this idea make clearer, better, or more complete?

Solutions: What problems are solved by application of this idea?

Outcomes: What results can be expected? Where could we go from there?

Parents face a series of unique new challenges in this more egalitarian world, not the least of which would be sending a daughter off to war. But parents all over this country are doing that right now, with daughters who enlisted; some have even expressed surprise that young women, in this day and age, are not required to register alongside their brothers and friends. While all involved in this debate over the years have invoked the assumed opposition of the people, even 10 years ago more than half of all Americans polled believed women should be made eligible for the draft. Besides, this is not about comfort but about fairness. My son has to register with the Selective Service this year, and if his sister does not when she turns 18, it makes a mockery not only of the standards of this household but of the standards of this nation.

It is possible in Afghanistan for women to be treated like little more than fecund pack animals precisely because gender fear and ignorance and hatred have been codified and permitted to hold sway. In this country, largely because of the concerted efforts of those allied with the women’s movement over a century of struggle, much of that bigotry has been beaten back, even buried. Yet in improbable places the creaky old ways surface, the ways suggesting that we women were made of finer stuff. The finer stuff was usually porcelain, decorative and on the shelf, suitable for meals and show. Happily, the finer stuff has been transmuted into the right stuff. But with rights come responsibilities, as teachers like to tell their students . . .

Think by using application. Thinking by using application defines the practical implications of something. It involves using what you know to demonstrate, show, relate, or extend ideas in view of their outcomes. For example, using what you have learned about the ecology of forest fires to examine the effects of a particular fire—that’s application in action.

Applying involves moving from ideas to possible action. First, understand the infor- mation you have. Second, relate this information to a given situation. Third, select those facts and details that clarify and support the application. Fourth, test the application to see whether it has been reasonable.

Example: Read the paragraphs below, from Anna Quindlen’s “Uncle Sam and Aunt Samantha” (pages 312–314). In this essay, Quindlen argues that in the United States, women— as well as men—should be eligible to be drafted for military service. In the passage below, she applies the concept of equal rights to this specific situation.

Using the word “egalitarian” to refer to a key principle, the writer points out the real inequality and argues for a change.

She backs up her conclusion with historical context and presses readers to agree.

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Reading, Thinking, Viewing, and Writing26

Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities

Learning-Outcomes Checklist I use the SQ3R reading method for important reading assignments for my courses and research projects, thinking about the rhetorical situation. (See pages 4–5.)

I read actively rather than passively by taking thoughtful notes, annotating texts, mapping, and outlining. (See pages 6–9.)

I respond to texts in an honest, fluid, reflective, and selective way. (See page 10.)

I effectively summarize texts, capturing the text’s main argument and providing the main supporting details—all in my own words and in a concise form. (See page 11.)

I view images actively instead of passively, thinking about the rhetorical situation. (See pages 12–13.)

I interpret images, asking deeper questions about each part of the rhetorical situation. (See pages 14–15.)

I judge the value of images, considering the purpose of the image and its quality. (See pages 16–17.)

I think critically through writing, analyzing, synthesizing, evaluating, and applying information. (See pages 18–25.)

As directed by your instructor, complete the following critical-thinking and writing activities by yourself or with classmates

1. Northrop Frye has argued that “[n]obody is capable of free speech unless he [or she] knows how to use language, and such knowledge is not a gift: It has to be learned and worked at.” How does Frye’s claim relate to the discussions of critical reading, viewing, and writing in this chapter?

2. What thinking, reading, viewing, and writing skills are required in your field of study? Ref lect on those possibilities.

3. Choose a subject you know something about. Practice thinking about that subject both inductively and deductively. Then write two paragraphs—one developed inductively and the other developed deductively.

4. Select a sample essay from the “Strategies and Models” section. Read the piece carefully and identify where and how the writer uses different thinking modes. Do the same analysis on a recent sample of your own writing, rating your analysis, synthesis, evaluation, and application.

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Visually Speaking

Painting is the process of converting infinite possibilities into a single image. How is writing similar? How is it different? What difficulties arise from converting the infinite into the particular?

The blank page or screen can be daunting for any writer. That’s because writing doesn’t go from nothing to a masterpiece in one step. Writing is a process, much like painting.

This chapter focuses on beginning that process. It provides numerous concrete strategies for understanding writing assignments, deciding on a topic, and exploring it. The very act of writing generates ideas and creates new connections that will make it easy to fill the blank page.

Beginning the Writing Process2 Learning Outcomes ▶ Understand the writing

process.

▶ Understand the rhetorical situation.

▶ Analyze the assignment. ▶ Select a subject. ▶ Collect information.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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The Writing Process28

 The Writing Process: From Start to Finish It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by a writing project—especially if the form of writing is new to you, the topic is complex, or the paper must be long. However, using the writing process will relieve some of that pressure by breaking down the task into manageable steps. An overview of those steps is shown below, and key principles are addressed on the next page.

Consider the writing process. The following flowchart maps out the basic steps in the writing process. As you work on your writing project, periodically review this diagram to keep yourself on task.

Getting Started Understanding the assignment Selecting a subject Collecting information

Planning Forming a thesis Using methods of development Developing a plan or an outline

Drafting Opening your draft Developing the middle Ending your draft

Revising Improving ideas, organization, and voice Revising collaboratively

Editing and Proofreading Editing for style Proofreading for correctness

Submitting Preparing a paper for submission Checking for page design and documentation

Submitting

Editing

Revising

Drafting

Planning

Getting Started

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 29

Adapt the process to your project. The writing process shown on the previous page is flexible, not rigid. As a writer, you need to adapt the process to your situation and assignment. To do so, consider these essential principles.

Writing tends not to follow a straight path. While writing begins with an assignment or a need and ends with a reader, the journey in between is often indirect. The steps in the flowchart overlap to show that when you write, you sometimes move back and forth between steps, meaning that the process is recursive. For example, during the revision phase, you may discover that you need to draft a new paragraph or do more research.

Each assignment presents distinct challenges. A personal essay may develop best through clustering or freewriting; a literary analysis through close reading of a story; a lab report through the experimental method; and a position paper through reading of books and journal articles, as well as through careful and balanced reasoning.

Writing can involve collaboration. From using your roommate as a sounding board for your topic choice to working with a group to produce a major report, college writing is not solitary writing. In fact, many colleges have a writing center to help you refine your writing assignments. (See pages 89–91 for more.)

Each writer works differently. Some writers do extensive prewriting before drafting, while others do not. You might develop a detailed outline, whereas someone else might draft a brief list of topics. Experiment with the strategies introduced in chapters 2–7, adopting those that help you.

Good writing can’t be rushed. Although some students regard pulling an all-nighter as a badge of honor, good writing takes time. A steady, disciplined approach will generally produce the best results. For example, by brainstorming or reading early in a project, you stimulate your subconscious mind to mull over issues, identify problems, and project solutions—even while your conscious mind is working on other things. Similarly, completing a first draft early enough gives you time to revise objectively.

Different steps call for attention to different writing issues. As you use the writing process, at each stage keep your focus where it belongs:

1. While getting started, planning, and drafting, focus on global issues: ideas, structure, voice, format, and design.

2. During revising, fix big content problems by cutting, adding, and thoroughly reworking material. (Our experience is that students benefit the most from revising—but spend the least time doing it!)

3. While editing and proofreading, pay attention to small, local issues— word choice, sentence smoothness, and grammatical correctness. Worrying about these issues early in the writing process interrupts the f low of drafting and wastes time on material that later is deleted.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Message (Subject + Purpose)

Medium (Form)

Context (Environment)

Receiver (Audience)

Sender (Creator)

The Writing Process30

 Understand the Rhetorical Situation Rhetoric is the art of using language effectively. As Aristotle, Quintilian, and others have explained, your language is effective when all aspects of your message fit the rhetorical situation:

Rhetorical Situation

Think of your role as the writer. Are you writing as a concerned citizen, as a student in a class, as a friend relating a story, as a reporter providing news, as a blogger giving an opinion? Your role in writing and otherwise communicating affects the level of language you use, the voice you use, the types of details you include, and so on.

Understand your subject. To truly understand your subject, you need to gather and assimilate all relevant details about it, including its history, makeup, function, and impact on people and culture. Knowing those details will help you narrow your focus to a specific thesis and support it well.

Writing with Sources: As you search for information, think about which types of sources are recommended or expected for the assignment. Which should be avoided?

Understand your purpose. Key words in an assignment—such as analyze, explain, defend, or describe—tell you what the purpose of the writing is supposed to be. Understanding why you are writing helps you choose an organizational strategy, such as classification, definition, or process. (See pages 62–66.)

Writing with Sources: Think of the sources that will most help you with your purpose, whether to entertain, compare, inspire, enlighten, and so on.

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 31

Understand your audience. For any writing task, you must understand your audience in order to develop writing that meets their needs. To assess your audience, answer questions like these:

■ Who are my readers: instructor? classmates? web users? ■ What do they know about my topic, and what do they need to know? ■ How well do they understand the terminology involved? ■ What are their attitudes toward the topic and toward me? ■ How well do they read written English—or visuals such as graphs and charts? ■ How will they use my writing (as entertainment or to complete a task)?

Note: Answers to such questions will help you develop meaningful sentences (pages 95–101), choose appropriate words (pages 102–106), and select relevant visuals (page 408).

Writing with Sources: Ask yourself what sources your reader will best understand and most respect. What sources will add to your credibility and authority?

Understand the medium (form). Many communication options are available for every message. Academic forms include essays, analyses, reports, proposals, research papers, reviews, and so on. It is important to understand the form of the assignment. What works well in a narrative about a past experience would not work as well in a lab report. Also, each of these forms can contain multiple media: written elements, graphics, photos, drawings, videos, audios, links, and so on. Understanding the overall medium and the media within it will help you succeed.

Writing with Sources: Make sure you understand the way that sources are to be cited in the form of communication you are using. (See 491–558 for MLA and APA styles.)

Think about the context. Think about how this assignment relates to others in the course. Consider these issues:

■ Weight: Is this an everyday assignment, a weekly or biweekly one, or the big one? ■ Assessment: Find out how the assignment will be graded. What rubric will be used? ■ Intent: Make certain that you understand the goals of the assignment and understand

what your instructor wants you to get out of it.

Note: If the writing you are doing is not in response to an assignment, think about the environment in which the message will be read. What is the history of this issue? What is the current climate like? What might the future be?

Writing with Sources: If you are writing material that will be reviewed and debated by others in your field, think about what sources you would most want your writing to appear in. Make certain you understand the submission guidelines for the source.

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 Understanding the Assignment Each college instructor has a way of personalizing a writing assignment, but most assignments will spell out (1) the objective, (2) the task, (3) the formal requirements, and (4) suggested approaches and topics. Your first step, therefore, is to read the assignment carefully, noting the options and restrictions that are part of it. The suggestions below will help you do that. (Also see pages 114–117 for one writer’s approach.)

Read the assignment. Certain words in the assignment explain what main action you must perform. Here are some words that signal what you are to do:

 Key Words

Analyze: Break down a topic into subparts, showing how those parts relate. Argue: Defend a claim with logical arguments. Classify: Divide a large group into well-defined subgroups. Compare/contrast: Point out similarities and/or differences. Define: Give a clear, thoughtful definition or meaning of something. Describe: Show in detail what something is like. Evaluate: Weigh the truth, quality, or usefulness of something. Explain: Give reasons, list steps, or discuss the causes of something. Interpret: Tell in your own words what something means. Reflect: Share your well-considered thoughts about a subject. Summarize: Restate someone else’s ideas very briefly in your own words. Synthesize: Connect facts or ideas to create something new.

 Options and Restrictions

The assignment often gives you some choice of your topic or approach but may restrict your options to suit the instructor’s purpose. Note the options and restrictions in the following short sample assignment:

Reflect on the way a natural disaster or major historical event has altered your understanding of the past, the present, or the future.

Options: (1) You may choose any natural disaster or historical event. (2) You may focus on the past, present, or future. (3) You may examine any kind of alteration.

Restrictions: (1) You must reflect on a change in your understanding. (2) The disaster must be natural. (3) The historical event must be major.

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 33

Relate the assignment to the goals of the course. 1. How much value does the instructor give the assignment? (The value is often

expressed as a percentage of the course grade.)

2. What benefit does your instructor want you to receive?

■ Strengthen your comprehension? ■ Improve your research skills? ■ Deepen your ability to explain, prove, or persuade? ■ Expand your style? ■ Increase your creativity?

3. How will this assignment contribute to your overall performance in the course? What course goals (often listed in the syllabus) does it address?

Relate the assignment to other assignments. 1. Does it build on previous assignments?

2. Does it prepare you for the next assignment?

Relate the assignment to your own interests. 1. Does it connect with a topic that already interests you?

2. Does it connect with work in your other courses?

3. Does it connect with the work you may do in your chosen field?

4. Does it connect with life outside school?

Reflect on the assignment. 1. First impulses: How did you feel when you first read the assignment?

2. Approaches: What’s the usual approach for an assignment like this? What’s a better way of tackling it?

3. Quality of performance: What would it take to produce an excellent piece of writing?

4. Benefits: What are the benefits to your education? to you personally? to the class? to society?

5. Features: Ref lect further on four key features of any writing assignment. Purpose: What is the overall purpose of the assignment—to inform, to explain, to

analyze, to entertain? What is the desired outcome? Audience: Should you address your instructor? your classmates? a general reader?

How much does the reader already know about the topic? What type of language should you use?

Form: What are the requirements concerning length, format, and due date? Assessment: How will the assignment be evaluated? How can you be sure that you

are completing the assignment correctly?

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 Selecting a Subject For some assignments, finding a suitable subject (or topic) may require little thinking on your part. If an instructor asks you to summarize an article in a professional journal, you know what you will write about—the article in question. But suppose the instructor asks you to analyze a feature of popular culture in terms of its impact on society. You won’t be sure of a specific writing topic until you explore the possibilities. Keep the following points in mind when you conduct a topic search. Your topic must . . .

■ meet the requirements of the assignment. ■ be limited in scope. ■ seem reasonable (that is, be within your means to research). ■ genuinely interest you.

Limit the subject area. Many of your writing assignments may relate to general subject areas you are currently studying. Your task, then, is to select a specific topic related to the general area of study—a topic limited enough that you can treat it with some depth in the length allowed for the assignment. The following examples show the difference between general subjects and limited topics:

General Subject Area: Popular culture Limited Topic: The Simpsons TV show General Subject Area: Energy sources Limited Topic: Using wind power

Conduct your search. Finding a writing idea that meets the requirements of the assignment should not be difficult, if you know how and where to look. Follow these steps:

1. Check your class notes and handouts for ideas related to the assignment.

2. Search the Internet. Type in a keyword or phrase (the general subject stated in the assignment) and see what you can find. You could also follow a subject tree to narrow a subject. (See page 462.)

3. Consult indexes, guides, and other library references. The Readers’ Guide to Periodical Literature, for example, lists current articles published on specific topics and where to find them. (See pages 452–457.)

4. Discuss the assignment with your instructor or an information specialist.

5. Use one or more of the prewriting strategies described on the following pages to generate possible writing ideas.

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 35

Explore for possible topics. You can generate possible writing ideas by using the following strategies. These same strategies can be used when you’ve chosen a topic and want to develop it further.

 Journal Writing

Write in a journal on a regular basis. Reflect on your personal feelings, develop your thoughts, and record the happenings of each day. Periodically go back and underline ideas that you would like to explore in writing assignments. In the following journal-writing samples, the writer came up with an idea for a writing assignment about the societal impacts of popular culture.

I read a really disturbing news story this morning. I’ve been thinking about it all day. In California a little girl was killed when she was struck by a car driven by a man distracted by a billboard ad for lingerie featuring a scantily clothed woman. Not only is it a horrifying thing to happen, but it also seems to me all too symbolic of the way that sexually charged images in the media are putting children, and especially girls, in danger. That reminds me of another news story I read this week about preteen girls wanting to wear the kinds of revealing outfits that they see in music videos, TV shows, and magazines aimed at teenagers. Too many of today’s media images give young people the impression that sexuality should begin at an early age. This is definitely a dangerous message.

 Freewriting

Write nonstop for ten minutes or longer to discover possible writing ideas. Use a key concept related to the assignment as a starting point. You’ll soon discover potential writing ideas that might otherwise have never entered your mind. Note in the following example that the writer doesn’t stop writing even when he can’t think of anything to say. Note also that he doesn’t stop to correct typos and other mistakes.

Popular culture. What does that include? Television obviously but thats a pretty boring subject. What else? Movies, pop music, video games. Is there a connection between playing violent video games and acting out violent behavior? Most video players I know would say no but sometimes news reports suggest a connection. Is this something I’d want to write about? Not really. What then? Maybe I could think about this a different way and focus on the positive effects of playing video games. They release tension for one thing and they can really be challenging. Other benefits? They help to kill time, that’s for sure, but maybe that’s not such a good thing. I would definitely read more if it weren’t for video games, tv, etc. Maybe I could write about how all the electronic entertainment that surrounds us today is creating a generation of nonreaders. Or maybe I could focus on whether people aren’t getting much physical exercise because of the time they spend with electronic media. Maybe both. At least I have some possibilities to work with.

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Quick Guide Freewriting

Freewriting is the writing you do without having a specific outcome in mind. You simply write down whatever pops into your head as you explore your topic. Freewriting can serve as a starting point for your writing, or it can be combined with any of the other prewriting strategies to help you select, explore, focus, or organize your writing. If you get stuck at any point during the composing process, you can return to freewriting as a way of generating new ideas.

Reminders ■ Freewriting helps you get your thoughts down on paper.

(Thoughts are constantly passing through your mind.) ■ Freewriting helps you develop and organize these thoughts. ■ Freewriting helps you make sense out of things that you may be studying or

researching. ■ Freewriting may seem awkward at times, but just stick with it.

The Process ■ Write nonstop and record whatever comes into your mind. Follow your thoughts

instead of trying to direct them. ■ If you have a particular topic or assignment to complete, use it as a starting point.

Otherwise, begin with anything that comes to mind. ■ Don’t stop to judge, edit, or correct your writing; that will come later. ■ Keep writing even when you think you have exhausted all of your ideas. Switch to

another angle or voice, but keep writing. ■ Watch for a promising writing idea to emerge. Learn to recognize the beginnings

of a good idea, and then expand that idea by recording as many specific details as possible.

The Result ■ Review your writing and underline the ideas you like. These ideas will often serve

as the basis for future writings. ■ Determine exactly what you need to write about. Once you’ve figured out what you

are required to do, you may then decide to do a second freewriting exercise. ■ Listen to and read the freewriting of others; learn from your peers.

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 37

 Listing

Freely list ideas as they come to mind, beginning with a key concept related to the assignment. (Brainstorming—listing ideas in conjunction with members of a group—is often an effective way to extend your lists.) The following is an example of a student’s list of ideas for possible topics on the subject of news reporting:

Aspect of popular culture: News reporting

Sensationalism Sound bites rather than in-depth analysis Focus on the negative Shock radio Shouting matches pretending to be debates Press leaks that damage national security, etc. Lack of observation of people’s privacy Bias Contradictory health news confusing to readers Little focus on “unappealing” issues like poverty Celebration of “celebrity”

 Clustering

To begin the clustering process, write a key word or phrase related to the assignment in the center of your paper. Circle it, and then cluster ideas around it. Circle each idea as you record it, and draw a line connecting it to the closest related idea. Keep going until you run out of ideas and connections. The following is a student’s cluster on the subject of sports:

TIP: After four or five minutes of listing or clustering, scan your work for an idea to explore in a freewriting. A writing idea should begin to emerge during this freewriting session. (See pages 35–36.)

Sports

professional sports women’s sports

cult of winning

college sports

players’ salaries

gambling

role models lack of support

recent advances

violence

effects on children’s sports

funding questions recruiting

abuses

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The Writing Process38

 Collecting Information Writer and instructor Donald Murray said that “writers write with information. If there is no information, there will be no effective writing.” How true! Before you can develop a thoughtful piece of writing, you must gain a thorough understanding of your topic; to do so, you must carry out the necessary reading, reflecting, and researching. Writing becomes a satisfying experience once you can speak with authority about your topic. Use the following guidelines when you start collecting information. (Also see “Research and Writing” in this book.)

■ Determine what you already know about your topic. (Use the strategies below this bulleted list.)

■ Consider listing questions you would like to answer during your research. (See page 39.)

■ Identify and explore possible sources of information. (See page 40.)

■ Carry out your research following a logical plan. (See pages 48–53.)

Find out what you already know. Use one or more of the following strategies to determine what you already know about a writing topic.

1. Focused freewriting: At this point, you can focus your freewriting by (1) exploring your limited topic from different angles or (2) approaching your freewriting as if it were a quick draft of the actual paper. A quick version will tell you how much you know about your topic and what you need to find out.

2. Clustering: Try clustering with your topic serving as the nucleus word. Your clustering should focus on what you already know. (See page 37.)

3. Five W’s of writing: Answer the five W’s—Who? What? When? Where? and Why?—to identify basic information on your subject. Add How? to the list for better coverage.

4. Directed writing: Write whatever comes to mind about your topic, using one of the modes listed below. (Repeat the process as often as you need to, selecting a different mode each time.)

Describe it: What do you see, hear, feel, smell, and taste? Compare it: What is it similar to? What is it different from? Associate it: What connections between this topic and others come to mind? Analyze it: What parts does it have? How do they work together? Argue it: What do you like about the topic? What do you not like about it? What

are its strengths and weaknesses? Apply it: What can you do with it? How can you use it?

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 39

Ask questions. To guide your collecting and researching, you may find it helpful to list questions about your topic that you would like to answer. Alternatively, you can refer to the questions below. These questions address problems, policies, and concepts. Most topics will fall under one of these categories. Use those questions that seem helpful as a guide to your research.

DESCRIPTION FUNCTION HISTORY VALUE

What is the problem?

What type of problem is it?

What are its parts?

What are the signs of the problem?

Who or what is affected by it?

What new problems might it cause in the future?

What is the current status of the problem?

What or who caused it?

What or who contributed to it?

What is its significance? Why?

Why is it more (or less) important than other problems?

What does it symbolize or illustrate?

What is the policy?

How broad is it?

What are its parts?

What are its most important features?

What is the policy designed to do?

What is needed to make it work?

What are or will be its effects?

What brought about this policy?

What are the alternatives?

Is the policy workable?

What are its advantages and disadvantages?

Is it practical?

Is it a good policy? Why or why not?

What is the concept?

What are its parts?

What is its main feature?

Whom or what is it related to?

Who has been influenced by this concept?

Why is it important?

How does it work?

When did it originate?

How has it changed over the years?

How might it change in the future?

What practical value does it have?

Why is it superior (or inferior) to similar concepts?

What is its social worth? C

O N

C E

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L I

C I

E S

R O

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The Writing Process40

Identify possible sources. Finding meaningful sources is one of the most important steps you will take as you prepare to write. Listed below are tips that will help you identify good sources:

1. Give yourself enough time. Finding good sources of information may be time- consuming. Books and periodicals you need may be checked out, your computer service may be down, and so on.

2. Be aware of the limits of your resources. Print material may be out-of-date. Online information may be more current, but it may not always be reliable. (See pages 426– 429 for ways to help you evaluate information.)

3. Use your existing resources to find additional sources of information. Pay attention to books, articles, and individuals mentioned in reliable initial sources of information.

4. Ask for help. The specialists in your school library can help you find information that is reliable and relevant. These people are trained to find information; don’t hesitate to ask for their help. (See page 449.)

5. Bookmark useful websites. Include reference works and academic resources related to your major.

 Explore different sources of information.

Of course, books and websites are not the only possible sources of information. Primary sources such as interviews, observations, and surveys may lead you to a more thorough and meaningful understanding of a topic. (See pages 443–445.)

Primary Sources Secondary Sources Interviews Articles Observations Reference book entries Participation Books Surveys Websites

 Carry out your research.

As you conduct your research, try to use a variety of reliable sources. It’s also a good idea to choose an efficient note-taking method before you start. You will want to take good notes on the information you find and record all the publishing information necessary for citing your sources. (See pages 432–435.)

Reserve a special part of a notebook to question, evaluate, and reflect on your research as it develops. The record of your thoughts and actions created during this process will mean a great deal to you—as much as or more than the actual information you uncover. Reflection helps you make sense of new ideas, refocus your thinking, and evaluate your progress.

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Chapter 2 Beginning the Writing Process 41

Track sources. Follow these strategies for tracking sources and taking notes.

Track resources in a working bibliography. Once you find a useful book, journal article, news story, or webpage, record identifying information for the source. For more help, see pages 430–431.

Use a note-taking system that respects sources. Essentially, your note-taking system should help you keep an accurate record of useful information and ideas from sources while also allowing you to engage those sources with your own thinking. For a discussion of possible systems, see pages 432–435.

Distinguish summaries, paraphrases, and quotations. As you read sources, you will find material that answers your questions and helps you achieve your writing purpose. At that point, decide whether to summarize, paraphrase, or quote the material:

■ A summary pulls just the main points out of a passage and puts them in your own words: Summarize source material when it contains relevant ideas and information that you can boil down.

■ A paraphrase rewrites a passage point by point in your own words: Paraphrase source material when all the information is important but the actual phrasing isn’t especially important or memorable.

■ A quotation records a passage from the source word for word: Quote when the source states something crucial and says it well. Note: In your notes, always identify quoted material by putting quotation marks around it.

Summarizing, paraphrasing, and quoting are treated more fully on pages 436–438. Here is a brief example, with the original passage coming from Coral Ann Howells’ Alice Munro, published in 1998 by Manchester University Press as part of its Contemporary World Writers series.

Original: “To read Munro’s stories is to discover the delights of seeing two worlds at once: an ordinary everyday world and the shadowy map of another imaginary or secret world laid over the real one, so that in reading we slip from one world into the other in an unassuming domestic sort of way.”

Summary: Munro’s fiction moves readers from recognizable reality into a hidden world.

Paraphrase: Reading Munro’s fiction gives readers the enjoyment of experiencing a double world: day-to-day reality and on top of that a more mysterious, fantastic world, with the result that readers move smoothly between the worlds in a seamless, ordinary way.

Quotation: Munro’s fiction takes us into “the shadowy map of another imaginary or secret world laid over the real one.”

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Cross-Curricular Connections Different academic disciplines require different methods of research note taking. Investigate the styles of research note taking used in your discipline.

Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities As directed by your instructor, complete the following critical-thinking and writing activities by yourself or with classmates.

1. Writer Ralph Fletcher shares, “When I write, I am always struck at how magical and unexpected the process turns out to be.” Would you describe the writing process you follow as “magical” and “unexpected”? Why or why not?

2. Reread one of your recent essays. Does the writing show that you thoroughly understood your subject, met the needs of your audience, and achieved your purpose?

3. Below is a list of general subject areas. Select one that interests you and do the following: Using the strategies on pages 34–37, brainstorm possible topics and select one. Then use the strategies on pages 38–40 to explore what you know about that topic and what you need to learn.

Arts/music Environment Health/medicine Work/occupation

Learning-Outcomes Checklist Use this checklist as a guide to help you plan your writing.

I understand the writing process—getting started, planning, drafting, revising, editing and proofreading, and submitting—and I adapt it to fit each project and my own individual style.

I know how to analyze the rhetorical situation:

■ My role—my position and my goals

■ The subject—the general area of inquiry

■ The purpose—to inform, explain, analyze, persuade

■ The form—essay, narrative, editorial, research paper

■ The audience—who they are, what they know, what they need

■ The context—weight, assessment, positioning of the project.

I know how to analyze an assignment, watching for options and restrictions.

I know how to select a subject and explore it through journal writing, freewriting, listing, clustering, and dialogue. I know how to focus the topic to fit the assignment and my interests.

I know how to collect information and track it through note taking and research strategies.

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Visually Speaking

Consider the photo above. In a paragraph or two, explain how planning might play a role in military life. What might be some of its benefits and drawbacks?

Some of us are meticulous planners. We organize our lives in advance and formulate strategies for completing every task. Others of us live more in the moment, believing that whatever needs to get done will get done, with or without a plan.

In writing, author and instructor Ken Macrorie calls for a blend of these two approaches: “Good writing,” says Macrorie, “is formed partly through plan and partly through accident.” In other words, too much early planning can get in the way of the discovery aspect of writing, while not enough planning can harm the focus and coherence of your writing.

Planning3 Learning Outcomes ▶ Take stock of the rhetorical

situation.

▶ Develop a focused thesis statement.

▶ Pattern your writing from your thesis.

▶ Organize your research.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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The Writing Process44

 Revisit the Rhetorical Situation Use the following planning checklist to help you decide whether to move ahead with your planning or reconsider your topic.

Rhetorical Checklist Writer

Am I interested in this topic?

How much do I know about this topic, and how much do I need to learn?

Subject Does the topic fit with the subject requirements of the assignment?

Is the topic the right size—not too general or too specific—for the assignment?

What sources can I use to find out more about this topic?

Purpose What are the specific goals of the assignment?

Am I writing to entertain, inform, explain, analyze, persuade, reflect?

Form What form should I create: essay, proposal, report, review?

Audience Will my readers be interested in this topic? How can I interest them?

What do they know and need to know about it? What opinions do they have?

Context What weight does this assignment have in terms of my grade?

How will the assignment be assessed?

Working with Sources: For projects that involve research, consider how the rhetorical situation can guide your use of sources:

1. For your subject, which sources offer reliable information and analysis that has shaped your thinking and pointed toward a working thesis?

2. To achieve your purpose (to entertain, inform, analyze, and/or persuade), which resources/sources should be featured in your writing?

3. Given your audience, which resources will help you create credibility with the audience and clarify the topic for them?

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Chapter 3 Planning 45

 Forming Your Thesis Statement After you have completed enough research and collecting, you may begin to develop a more focused interest in your topic. If all goes well, this narrowed focus will give rise to a thesis for your writing. A thesis statement identifies your central idea. It usually highlights a special condition or feature of the topic, expresses a specific claim about it, or takes a stand.

State your thesis in a sentence that effectively expresses what you want to explore or explain in your essay. Sometimes a thesis statement develops early and easily; at other times, the true focus of your writing emerges only after you’ve written your first draft.

Find a focus. A general subject area is typically built into your writing assignments. Your task, then, is to find a limited writing topic and examine it from a particular angle or perspective. (You will use this focus to form your thesis statement.)

State your thesis. You can use the following formula to write a thesis statement for your essay. A thesis statement sets the tone and direction for your writing. Keep in mind that at this point you’re writing a working thesis statement—a statement in progress, so to speak. You may change it as your thinking on the topic evolves.

General Subject

Alternative energy sources

a manageable or limited topic

wind power

a specific claim or focus

provides a viable energy source in the plains states

an effective thesis statement

Wind power provides a viable energy source in the plains states.

Limited Topic

Wind power

Specific Focus

Wind power as a viable energy source in the Plains states

Working with Sources: Sometimes your writing can take direction specifically from your sources. You may consider making your thesis a response to a specific source. For example, if one source is especially strong or especially contrary to your own thinking, you could shape your thesis as an affirmation of the strong source’s authority or as a rebuttal to the contrary source’s claims.

+ =

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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The Writing Process46

 Using a Thesis to Pattern Your Writing An organizing pattern for your essay may be built into your assignment. For example, you may be asked to develop an argument or to write a process paper. When a pattern is not apparent, one may still evolve naturally during the research and information-collecting steps. If this doesn’t happen, take a careful look at your thesis statement.

Let your thesis guide you. An effective thesis will often suggest an organizing pattern. Notice how the thesis statements below direct and shape the writing to follow. (Also see page 21.)

 Thesis (Focus) for a Personal Narrative

Writers of personal narratives do not always state a thesis directly, but they will generally have in mind an implied theme or main idea that governs the way they develop their writing. The thesis below focuses the reader’s attention on a less-than-perfect day in the life of a perfect flight attendant. (See pages 151–152.)

From the first day Northwest hired me in Minneapolis in 1969, I tried to be a model flight attendant, to develop the qualities my operations manual demanded: poise, good judgment, initiative, adaptability and a spotless appearance. But one time I slipped up: I fell asleep.

While most of America’s corporations are still commanded by male chief executives, women are gaining ground, winning vice-presidential and top management slots and, in a few cases, the highest leadership roles. Many of these young female executives say playing team sports helped them get ahead.

To wear hijab—Islamic covering—is to invite contradiction. Sometimes I hate it. Sometimes I value it.

 Thesis for a Cause-and-Effect Essay

A cause-and-effect essay usually begins with one or more causes followed by an explanation of the effects, or with a primary effect followed by an explanation of the causes. In the thesis below, the writer credits team sports with helping to advance women into leadership roles in major corporations. (See pages 170–172.)

 Thesis for an Essay of Comparison

Some comparisons treat one subject before the other (subject by subject), others discuss the subjects point by point, and some treat similarities and then differences. The writer of the thesis below introduces her comparison and contrast of two different views of Islamic dress—both of which she holds. (See pages 186–188.)

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Chapter 3 Planning 47

There are four main perspectives, or approaches, that readers can use to converse about literature.

Fatherlessness is the most harmful demographic trend of this generation. Yet, despite its scale and social consequences, fatherlessness is a problem that is frequently ignored or denied.

Let me see if I can explain the original meaning and also how daft and deft came to part company.

While women are represented today in virtually all fields, including the armed forces, only men are required to register for the military draft that would be used in the event of a national-security crisis.

When a cell begins to function abnormally, it can initiate a process that results in cancer.

 Thesis for an Essay of Classification

An essay of classification identifies the main parts or categories of a topic and then examines each one. In the thesis below, the writer identifies four ways to discuss literature, and he examines each one in turn. (See pages 206–207.)

 Thesis for a Position Essay

A position paper first introduces a topic and then states a position in its thesis. The thesis statement below defines the writer’s position on fatherlessness. (See pages 279–283.)

 Thesis for an Essay of Definition

An essay of definition explores the denotation, connotation, and history of a term. In the following thesis statement, the writer names the two words he will explore—deft and daft— and provides an overview of the definition essay. (See page 235.)

 Thesis for an Essay Proposing a Solution

A problem-solution essay usually begins with a discussion of the problem and its causes and then examines possible solutions. In the following thesis statement, the writer points to a problem in the supposedly gender-equal society of the United States. After explaining the problem, she offers and argues for a specific solution. (See pages 312–314.)

 Thesis for a Process Essay

Process essays are organized chronologically. As indicated in the thesis below, the writer of this essay will explain how cancer cells multiply and affect the body. (See pages 217–218.)

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 Developing a Plan or an Outline After writing a working thesis and reviewing the methods of development (pages 45–47), you should be ready to organize the information you have collected. Remember, organizing your research and background information before you start writing can make the drafting stage less of a hassle. Here are five strategies for effective organizing, starting with the basic list.

Quick List A brief listing of main points (See below.)

Topic Outline A more formal plan, including main points and essential details (See page 49.)

Sentence Outline A formal plan, including main points and essential details, written as complete sentences (See page 50.)

Writing Blueprints Basic organizational strategies preferred for different forms of writing (See page 51.)

Graphic Organizer An arrangement of main points and essential details in an appropriate chart or diagram (See pages 52–53.)

Quick Lists Though listing is the simplest of all the methods of organization, it can help you take stock of your main ideas and get a sense of what further research or planning needs to be done. There is no right or wrong way to go about listing. The key is to come up with a system that works best for you. Here are two examples that you may consider: the basic bulleted list, which briefly lists the main points you will discuss, and a T Chart, which lists the main points on one side and a supporting detail on the other side.

Sample Basic List

Sample T Chart

Topic: Different ways to discuss literature

 Focus on the text itself

 Focus on the text and the reader

 Focus on the author of the text

 Focus on ideas outside of literature

Topic: Different ways to discuss literature

Main Points Supporting Details

Text-centered approach Emphasizes structure and rules Audience-centered approach Relationship between reader and text Author-centered approach Emphasizes the writer’s life

Main Points

Topic

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Chapter 3 Planning 49

Topic Outline If you have a good deal of information to sort and arrange, you may want to use a topic outline for your planning. In a topic outline, you state each main point and essential detail as a word or phrase. Before you start constructing your outline, write your working thesis statement at the top of your paper to help keep you focused on the subject. (Do not attempt to outline your opening and closing paragraphs unless you are specifically asked to do so.)

An effective topic outline is parallel in structure, meaning the main points (I, II, III) and essential details (A, B, C) are stated in the same way. Notice how the sample outline below uses a parallel structure, making it easy to follow.

Sample Topic Outline

Thesis: There are four main perspectives, or approaches, that readers can use to converse about literature.

I. Text-centered approaches a. Also called formalist criticism b. Emphasis on structure of text and rules of genre c. Importance placed on key literary elements

II. Audience-centered approaches a. Also called rhetorical or reader-response criticism b. Emphasis on interaction between reader and text

III. Author-centered approaches a. Emphasis on writer’s life b. Importance placed on historical perspective c. Connections made between texts

IV. Ideological approaches a. Psychological analysis of text b. Myth or archetype criticism c. Moral criticism d. Sociological analysis

InSIght: Planning is adaptable. Some writers prefer to generate an outline before they begin writing, while others prefer to make a more detailed outline after having written a draft. In the latter strategy, an outline can serve as a tool for evaluating the logic and completeness of the paper’s organization.

Thesis

Main Point

Supporting Details

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The Writing Process50

Sentence Outline A sentence outline uses complete sentences to explain the main points and essential details in the order that they will be covered in the main part of your essay. Such an outline can help you develop your ideas when writing the paper.

Sample Sentence Outline

Thesis: There are four main perspectives, or approaches, that readers can use to converse about literature. I. A text-centered approach focuses on the literary piece itself. a. This approach is often called formalist criticism. b. This method of criticism examines text structure and the

rules of the genre. c. A formalist critic determines how key literary elements

reinforce meaning. II. An audience-centered approach focuses on the “transaction”

between text and reader. a. This approach is often called rhetorical or reader-response

criticism. b. A rhetorical critic sees the text as an activity that is different

for each reader. III. An author-centered approach focuses on the origin of a text. a. An author-centered critic examines the writer’s life. b. This method of criticism may include a historical look at a text. c. Connections may be made between the text and related works. IV. The ideological approach applies ideas outside of literature. a. Some critics apply psychological theories to a literary work. b. Myth or archetype criticism applies anthropology and classical

studies to a text. c. Moral criticism explores the moral dilemmas in literature. d. Sociological approaches include Marxist, feminist, and minority

criticism.

Working with Sources: When your writing project involves sources, the planning phase will include a great deal of sorting through material. Outlining can help you organize your primary and secondary sources to best support your thesis. As you organize your research in your outline, ask these questions:  Where and how should I work with primary sources—interviews, surveys,

analyses, observations, experiments, and other data I have collected?  Where and how should I bring in secondary sources—scholarly books, journal

articles, and the like?

Thesis

Main Point

Supporting Details

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Chapter 3 Planning 51

Classification Blueprint

Comparison – Contrast Blueprint

Cause – Effect Blueprint Problem-Solution Blueprint

Writing Blueprints The writing blueprints on this page lay out basic organizational strategies for different forms of writing. The blueprints may help you arrange the details of your essay or even find holes in your research.

Cause

Beginning

Cause

Effect(s)

Ending

Point A Subject 1 Subject 2

Point B Subject 1 Subject 2

Beginning

Ending

Subgroup 1 Point 1 Point 2

Subgroup 3 Point 1 Point 2

Subgroup 2 Point 1 Point 2

Subgroup 4 Point 1 Point 2

Beginning

Subject 1

Subject 2

Beginning

Ending

Problem(s)

Solution(s)

Objection(s)

Rebuttal(s)

Beginning

Effect

Ending

Cause(s)

Ending

Point by Point

Cause-Focused Effect-Focused

Subject by Subject

Beginning

Similarities

Differences

Ending

Simlarities-Differences

Topic

Main Points

Approaches to Conversing About Literature

Text-Centered

Audience-Centered

Author-Centered

Ideological

Summary

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The Writing Process52

Graphic Organizers If you are a visual person, you might prefer a graphic organizer when it comes to arranging your ideas for an essay or a report. Graphic organizers can help you map out ideas and illustrate relationships among them. The following organizers are related to the methods of development discussed on pages 46–47. Each will help you collect and organize your information. Adapt the organizers as necessary to fit your particular needs or personal style.

Cause/Effect (T Chart)

Comparison/Contrast (Venn Diagram)

Classification (Line Diagram)

covers moral, psychological, or sociological analysis

studies structure of text

focuses on key literary elements

explores reader and text interaction

puts text in historical perspective

focuses on writer’s life

Approaches to Conversing About Literature

Text-centered Audience-centered Author-centered Ideological

Subject:

Causes (Because of . . .)

Effects (. . . these conditions resulted)

•

Subject A Subject B

Similarities

Differences

Note how the line diagram breaks out the topic, main ideas, and supporting details for use in building an essay of classification.

Topic

Supporting Details

Main Points

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Chapter 3 Planning 53

Comparison Process Analysis

Problem/Solution Definition

Qualities Subject A Subject B Subject: ____________________

(Chronological Order)

Step 1

Step 2

Step 3

Cause of the Problem

Quotations

Words

Ne ga

tiv e

De fin

iti on

P er

so n

D efi

n it

io n

Synonym

Antonym

History

Possible Solutions

Future Implication

Parts of the Problem

Problem

Concept to Be

Defined

Im po

rta nt

Fa ct

sD ic

ti o

n ar

D efi

n it

io n

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The Writing Process54

Cross-Curricular Connections In most disciplines, it is common practice early in the paper to “survey the literature” on the topic. In a literary analysis, you might survey common interpretations of a key concept before you relay your view.

1. Identify the studies that should be included in the review.

2. Categorize studies by approach or arrange them chronologically.

Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities As directed by your instructor, complete the following activities.

1. Author Ken Macrorie claims that “good writing is formed partly through plan and partly through accident.” Do you agree? Why or why not? Relate Macrorie’s idea to your own writing experiences. How carefully do you plan? How much do you leave to accident?

2. A number of organizational patterns are discussed on pages 46–47. Choose one of these patterns and select a model essay from chapters 10–19 that follows the pattern. Read the essay, note the thesis, and explain how the writer develops it.

Learning-Outcomes Checklist Use this checklist as a guide to help you plan your writing.

I have taken stock of the rhetorical situation. ■ I have reviewed the information I have collected so far. ■ My planning and research fully address my subject, purpose,

and audience.

I have developed a focused thesis statement. ■ My thesis statement ref lects a limited topic. ■ My thesis statement clearly states the specific idea I plan to develop. ■ The thesis is supported by the information I have gathered.

I have patterned my writing from my thesis. ■ The thesis suggests a pattern of organization for my essay.

I have organized my research. ■ I have organized my support in a list, an outline, or a graphic organizer. ■ I have arranged my source material under my main supporting points.

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Visually Speaking

How is drafting like sketching? Note the blurred hand with the pencil. What does it suggest about the process of drafting?

French novelist Anatole France once said that his first drafts could have been written by a schoolboy, his next draft by a bright college student, his third draft by a superior graduate, and his final draft “only by Anatole France.” Think in those terms as you write your first draft. Your main objective is to get ideas down; you’ll have a chance later to improve your writing.

This chapter provides information and advice about drafting a college-level essay. You’ll find specific advice for creating the three main parts and arranging information.

Drafting4 Learning Outcomes ▶ Reconsider the rhetorical

situation.

▶ Understand essay structure.

▶ Create a strong opening. ▶ Develop the middle. ▶ Create an effective closing. ▶ Understand how to use

sources in a draft.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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The Writing Process56

 Reconsider the Rhetorical Situation As you prepare to write, think about the parts of the rhetorical situation:

Think about your role. Are you writing as a student, a citizen, a friend, a member of a scholarly community or discipline? Use a voice that represents you well.

Focus on your subject. As you develop your first draft, these strategies can help you keep your subject in focus.

■ Use your outline or writing plan as a general guide. Try to develop your main points, but allow new ideas to emerge naturally.

■ Write freely without being too concerned about neatness and correctness. Concentrate on developing your ideas, not on producing a final copy.

■ Include as much detail as possible, continuing until you reach a logical stopping point.

■ Use your writing plan or any charts, lists, or diagrams you’ve produced, but don’t feel absolutely bound by them.

■ Complete your first draft in one or two sittings.

■ Use the most natural voice you can so that the writing will f low smoothly. If your voice is too formal during drafting, you’ll be tempted to stop and edit your words.

■ Quote sources accurately by using your word-processing program’s copy-and-paste features or by handwriting or typing quotations carefully.

Reconsider your purpose. Briefly review (1) what you want your writing to do (your task), (2) what you want it to say (your thesis), and (3) how you want to say it (list of ideas or outline).

Reconsider your audience. Review who your readers are, including their knowledge of and attitude toward your topic. Then get ready to talk with them, person to person.

Review the form and context. Make sure you understand the type of writing you should do, the weight of the assignment, and any assessment issues.

Writing with Sources: Use sources that aid your purpose and connect to your audience. Also, make sure your sources do not crowd out your own reasoning and thinking—your role in the assignment.

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Chapter 4 Drafting 57

 Basic Essay Structure: Major Moves The following chart lists the main writing moves that occur during the development of a piece of writing. Use it as a general guide for all of your drafting. Remember to keep your purpose and audience in mind throughout the drafting process.

Engage your reader. Stimulate and direct the reader’s attention.

Establish your direction. Identify the topic and put it in perspective.

Get to the point. Narrow your focus and state your thesis.

Opening

Advance your thesis. Provide background information and cover your main points.

Test your ideas. Raise questions and consider alternatives.

Support your main points. Add substance and build interest.

Build a coherent structure. Start new paragraphs and arrange the support.

Use different levels of detail. Clarify and complete each main point.

Middle

Reassert the main point. Remind the reader of the purpose and rephrase the thesis.

Urge the reader. Gain the reader’s acceptance and look ahead.

Ending

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The Writing Process58

 Opening Your Draft The opening paragraph is one of the most important elements in any composition. It should accomplish at least three essential things: (1) engage the reader; (2) establish your direction, tone, and level of language; and (3) introduce your line of thought.

Advice: The conventional way of approaching the first paragraph is to view it as a kind of “funnel” that draws a reader in and narrows to a main point. Often, the final sentence explicitly states your thesis.

Cautions: ■ Don’t feel bound by the conventional pattern, which may sound stale if not handled well.

■ Don’t let the importance of the first paragraph paralyze you. Relax and write.

The information on the next two pages will help you develop your opening. You can refer to the sample essays in the handbook for ideas.

Engage your reader. Your reader will be preoccupied with other thoughts until you seize, stimulate, and direct his or her attention. Here are some effective ways to “hook” the reader:

■ Mention little-known facts about the topic.

Beads may have been what separated human ancestors from their Neanderthal cousins. Yes, beads.

■ Pose a challenging question.

Why would human ancestors spend days carving something as frivolous as beads while Neanderthals spent days hunting mammoths?

■ Offer a thought-provoking quotation.

“The key thing in human evolution is when people start devoting just ridiculous amounts of time to making these [beads],” says archeologist John Shea of Stonybrook University.

■ Tell a brief, illuminating story.

When I walked into the room, I had only to show my hand to be accepted in the group of strangers there. The Phi Delta Kappa ring on my finger—and on all of our fingers—bound us across space and time as a group. Our ancestors discovered the power of such ornamentation forty thousand years ago.

Establish your direction. The direction of your line of thought should become clear in the opening part of your writing. Here are some moves you might make to set the right course:

■ Identify the topic (issue). Show a problem, a need, or an opportunity.

■ Deepen the issue. Connect the topic, showing its importance.

■ Acknowledge other views. Tell what others say or think about the topic.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 4 Drafting 59

Get to the point. You may choose to state your main point up front, or you may wait until later to introduce your thesis. For example, you could work inductively by establishing an issue, a problem, or a question in your opening and then build toward the answer—your thesis—in your conclusion. (See page 20 for more on inductive reasoning.) Sometimes, in fact, your thesis may simply be implied. In any case, the opening should at least hint at the central issue or thesis of your paper. Here are three ways to get to the point:

1. Narrow your focus. Point to what interests you about the topic.

2. Raise a question. Answer the question in the rest of the essay.

3. State your thesis. If appropriate, craft a sentence that boils down your thinking to a central claim. You can use the thesis sentence as a “map” for the organization of the rest of the essay. (See pages 45–47, 114–117, and 416–417.)

 Weak Opening

Although the opening below introduces the topic, the writing lacks interesting details and establishes no clear focus for the essay.

I would like to tell you about the TV show The Simpsons. It’s about this weird family of five people who look kind of strange and act even stranger. In fact, the characters aren’t even real—they’re just cartoons.

 Strong Opening

In the essay opener below, the writer uses his first paragraph to get his readers’ attention and describe his subject. He uses the second paragraph to raise a question that leads him to a statement of his thesis (underlined).

The Simpsons, stars of the TV show by the same name, are a typical American family, or at least a parody of one. Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie Simpson live in Springfield, U.S.A. Homer, the father, is a boorish, obese oaf who works in a nuclear power plant. Marge is an overprotective, nagging mother with an outrageous blue hairdo. Ten-year-old Bart is an obnoxious, “spiky-haired demon.” Lisa is eight and a prodigy on the tenor saxophone and in class. The infant Maggie never speaks but only sucks on her pacifier.

What is the attraction of this yellow-skinned family that stars on a show in which all of the characters have pronounced overbites and only four fingers on each hand? Viewers see a little bit of themselves in everything the Simpsons do. The world of Springfield is a parody of the viewer’s world, and Americans can’t get enough of it. Viewers experience this parody in the show’s explanations of family, education, workplace, and politics.

InSIght: Note how, after stating the thesis, the writer forecasts the method of supporting that thesis.

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The Writing Process60

 Developing the Middle The middle of an essay is where you do the “heavy lifting.” In this part you develop the main points that support your thesis statement.

Advice: As you write, you will likely make choices that were unforeseen when you began. Use “scratch outlines” (temporary jottings) along the way to show where your new ideas may take you.

Cautions: ■ Writing that lacks effective detail gives only a vague image of the writer’s intent.

■ Writing that wanders loses its hold on the essay’s purpose.

For both of these reasons, always keep your thesis in mind when you develop the main part of your writing. Refer to the guidelines on the next two pages for help. You can refer to the sample essays in this book for ideas.

Advance your thesis. If you stated a thesis in the opening, you can advance it in the middle paragraphs by covering your main points and supporting them in these ways.

Explain: Provide important facts, details, and examples.

Narrate: Share a brief story or re-create an experience to illustrate an idea.

Describe: Tell in detail how someone appears or how something works.

Define: Identify or clarify the meaning of a specific term or idea.

Analyze: Examine the parts of something to better understand the whole.

Compare: Provide examples to show how two things are alike or different.

Argue: Use logic and evidence to prove that something is true.

Reflect: Express your thoughts or feelings about something.

Cite authorities: Add expert analysis or personal commentary.

Test your ideas. When you write a first draft, you’re testing your initial thinking about your topic. You’re determining whether your thesis is valid and whether you have enough compelling information to support it. Here are ways to test your line of thinking as you write:

Raise questions. Try to anticipate your readers’ questions. Consider alternatives. Look at your ideas from different angles; weigh various options; reevaluate your thesis. Answer objections. Directly or indirectly deal with possible problems that a skeptical reader might point out.

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Chapter 4 Drafting 61

Build a coherent structure. Design paragraphs as units of thought that develop and advance your thesis clearly and logically. For example, look at the brief essay below, noting how each body paragraph presents ideas with supporting details that build on and deepen the main idea.

Seeing the Light

All lightbulbs make light, so they’re all the same, right? Not quite. You have many

choices regarding how to light up your life. Two types of bulbs are the traditional

incandescent and the newer, more compact fluorescent. By checking out how they’re

different, you can better choose which one to buy.

While either incandescent or compact fluorescent bulbs can help you read or

find the bathroom at night, each bulb makes light differently. In an incandescent

bulb, electricity heats up a tungsten filament (thin wire) to 450 degrees, causing it

to glow with a warm, yellow light. A compact fluorescent is a glass tube filled with

mercury vapor and argon gas. Electricity causes the mercury to give off ultraviolet

radiation. That radiation then causes phosphors coating the inside of the tube to give

off light.

Both types of bulbs come in many shapes, sizes, and brightnesses, but compacts

have some restrictions. Because of their odd shape, compacts may not fit in a lamp

well. Compacts also may not work well in very cold temperatures, and they can’t be

used with a dimmer switch.

On the other hand, while compact fluorescents are less flexible than incandescents,

compacts are four times more efficient. For example, a 15-watt compact produces as

many lumens of light as a 60-watt incandescent! Why? Incandescents turn only about

5 percent of electricity into light and give off the other 95 percent as heat.

But are compacts less expensive than incandescents? In the short run, no. A

compact costs about $15 while an incandescent costs only a dollar. However, because

compacts burn less electricity—and last 7 to 10 times longer—in the long run,

compacts are less expensive.

Now that you’re no longer in the dark about lightbulbs, take a look at the lamp

you’re using to read this essay. Think about the watts (electricity used), lumens (light

produced), efficiency, purchase price, and lamplife. Then decide how to light up your

life in the future.

The writer introduces the topic and states his thesis.

He next explains the strengths of compacts.

The writer shifts his attention to weaknesses of compact bulbs.

The writer starts with a basic explana- tion of how the two types of lightbulbs function differently.

He acknowl- edges that compacts cost more, but he justifies the cost.

The writer rephrases his thesis as a challenge.

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The Writing Process62

Arrange supporting details. Organizing information in a logical pattern within a paragraph strengthens its coherence. The following pages explain and illustrate organizational strategies, providing suggested transitions to go with them. (See also page 481.)

 Definition

A definition provides the denotation (dictionary meaning) and connotation (feeling) of a given term. It often provides examples, gives anecdotes, and offers negative definitions— what the thing is not. In the paragraph below, the writer begins his definition by posing a question.

First of all, what is the grotesque—in visual art and in literature? A term originally applied to Roman cave art that distorted the normal, the grotesque presents the body and mind so that they appear abnormal— different from the bodies and minds that we think belong in our world. Both spiritual and physical, bizarre and familiar, ugly and alluring, the grotesque shocks us, and we respond with laughter and fear. We laugh because the grotesque seems bizarre enough to belong only outside our world; we fear because it feels familiar enough to be part of it. Seeing the grotesque version of life as it is portrayed in art stretches our vision of reality. As Bernard McElroy argues, “The grotesque transforms the world from what we ‘know’ it to be to what we fear it might be. It distorts and exaggerates the surface of reality in order to tell a qualitative truth about it.”

—John Van Rys

 Illustration

An illustration supports a general idea with specific reasons, facts, and details.

As the years passed, my obsession grew. Every fiber and cell of my body was obsessed with the number on the scale and how much fat I could pinch on my thigh. No matter how thin I was, I thought I could never be thin enough. I fought my sisters for control of the TV and VCR to do my exercise programs and videos. The cupboards were stacked with cans of diet mixes, the refrigerator full of diet drinks. Hidden in my underwear drawer were stacks of diet pills that I popped along with my vitamins. At my worst, I would quietly excuse myself from family activities to turn on the bathroom faucet full blast and vomit into the toilet. Every day I stood in front of the mirror, a ritual not unlike brushing my teeth, and scrutinized my body. My face, arms, stomach, buttocks, hips, and thighs could never be small enough.

—Paula Treick

additionally again along with also and

another as well besides finally for example

for instance in addition in other words moreover next

other that is

Illustration/Elaboration

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 4 Drafting 63

 Analogy

An analogy is a comparison that a writer uses to explain a complex or unfamiliar phenomenon (how the immune system works) in terms of a familiar one (how mall security works).

The human body is like a mall, and the immune system is like mall security. Because the mall has hundreds of employees and thousands of customers, security guards must rely on photo IDs, name tags, and uniforms to decide who should be allowed to open cash registers and who should have access to the vault. In the same way, white blood cells and antibodies need to use DNA cues to recognize which cells belong in a body and which do not. Occasionally security guards make mistakes, wrestling Kookie the Klown to the ground while DVD players “walk” out of the service entrance, but these problems amount only to allergic reactions or little infections. If security guards become hypervigilant, detaining every customer and employee, the situation is akin to leukemia, in which white blood cells attack healthy cells. If security guards become corrupt, letting thieves take a “five-finger discount,” the situation is akin to AIDS. Both systems—mall security and human immunity—work by correctly differentiating friend from foe.

—Rob King

 Cause and Effect

Cause-and-effect organization shows how events are linked to their results. If you start with effects, follow with specific causes; if you begin with causes, follow with specific effects. The example below discusses the effects of hypothermia on the human body.

Even a slight drop in the normal human body temperature of 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit causes hypothermia. Often produced by accidental or prolonged exposure to cold, the condition forces all bodily functions to slow down. The heart rate and blood pressure decrease. Breathing becomes slower and shallower. As the body temperature drops, these effects become even more dramatic until it reaches somewhere between 86 and 82 degrees Fahrenheit and the person lapses into unconsciousness. When the temperature reaches between 65 and 59 degrees Fahrenheit, heart action, blood flow, and electrical brain activity stop. Normally such a condition would be fatal. However, as the body cools down, the need for oxygen also slows down. A person can survive in a deep hypothermic state for an hour or longer and be revived without serious complications.

—Laura Black

as a result because consequently due to the fact that every time that inevitably

resulting in since therefore

Cause and Effect

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The Writing Process64

 Narration

In the paragraph below, the writer uses narration and chronological order to relate an anecdote—a short, illustrative story.

When I was six or seven years old, growing up in Pittsburgh, I used to take a precious penny of my own and hide it for someone else to find. It was a curious compulsion; sadly, I’ve never been seized by it since. For some reason I always “hid” the penny along the same stretch of sidewalk up the street. I would cradle it at the roots of a sycamore, say, or in a hole left by a chipped-off piece of sidewalk. Then I would take a piece of chalk, and, starting at either end of the block, draw huge arrows leading up to the penny from both directions. After I learned to write I labeled the arrows: surprise ahead or money this way. I was greatly excited, during all this arrow-drawing, at the thought of the first lucky passer-by who would receive in this way, regardless of merit, a free gift from the universe. But I never lurked about. I would go straight home and not give the matter another thought, until, some months later, I would be gripped again by the impulse to hide another penny.

—Annie Dillard, Pilgrim at Tinker Creek

 Process

In the paragraph that follows, a student writer describes the process of entering the “tube,” or “green room,” while surfing.

At this point you are slightly ahead of the barreling part of the wave, and you need to “stall,” or slow yourself, to get into the tube. There are three methods of stalling used in different situations. If you are slightly ahead of the tube, you can drag your inside hand along the water to stall. If you are a couple of feet in front of the barrel, apply all your weight onto your back foot and sink the tail of the board into the water. This is known as a “tail stall” for obvious reasons, and its purpose is to decrease your board speed. If you are moving faster than the wave is breaking, you need to do what is called a “wrap-around.” To accomplish this maneuver, lean back away from the wave while applying pressure on the tail. This shifts your forward momentum away from the wave and slows you down. When the wave comes, turn toward the wave and place yourself in the barrel.

—Luke Sunukjian, “Entering the Green Room”

a day before about after afterward as soon as at

before during finally first in the end later

meanwhile next second soon then today

tomorrow until yesterday

Narration/Process/Chronological

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Chapter 4 Drafting 65

 Chronological Order

Chronological (time) order helps you tell a story or present steps in a process. For example, the following paragraph describes how cement is made. Notice how the writer explains every step and uses transitional words to lead readers through the process.

The production of cement is a complicated process. The raw materials that go into cement consist of about 60 percent lime, 25 percent silica, and 5 percent alumina. The remaining 10 percent is a varying combination of gypsum and iron oxide (because the amount of gypsum determines the drying time of the cement). First, this mixture is ground up into very fine particles and fed into a kiln. Cement kilns, the largest pieces of moving machinery used by any industry, are colossal steel cylinders lined with firebricks. They can be 25 feet in diameter and up to 750 feet long. The kiln is built at a slant and turns slowly as the cement mix makes its way down from the top end. A flame at the bottom heats the kiln to temperatures of up to 3,000 degrees Fahrenheit. When the melted cement compound emerges from the kiln, it cools into little marble-like balls called clinker. Finally, the clinker is ground to a consistency finer than flour and packaged as cement.

—Kevin Maas

 Classification

When classifying a subject, place the subject in its appropriate category and then show how this subject is different from other subjects in the same category. In the following paragraph, a student writer uses classification to describe the theory of temperament.

Medieval doctors believed that “four temperaments rule mankind wholly.” According to this theory, each person has a distinctive temperament or personality (sanguine, phlegmatic, melancholy, or choleric) based on the balance of four elements in the body, a balance peculiar to the individual. The theory was built on Galen’s and Hippocrates’ notion of “humors,” which stated that the body contains blood, phlegm, black bile, and yellow bile—four fluids that maintain the balance within the body. The sanguine person was dominated by blood, associated with fire: Blood was hot and moist, and the person was fat and prone to laughter. The phlegmatic person was dominated by phlegm (associated with earth) and was squarish and slothful—a sleepy type. The melancholy person was dominated by cold, black bile (connected with the element of water) and as a result was pensive, peevish, and solitary. The choleric person was dominated by hot, yellow bile (air) and thus was inclined to anger.

—Jessica Radsma

a typical type another kind a second variety

in one category one type rarest of all

the third variety the most common the most popular

Classification

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 Climax

Climax is a method in which you first present details and then provide a general climactic statement or conclusion drawn from the details.

As I walked home, I glanced across the road to see a troubling scene unfold. A burly man strode along the curb, shoulders rounded and face clenched in anger or grief. Behind him, a slim little girl sat on her heels on the sidewalk, hands in her lap and tears streaming down white cheeks. I glanced back at that brute, who climbed into his big black truck and started up the engine. I almost ran across the road to stop him, to set right whatever he’d done. But then I spotted the little dog lying very still in the gutter. The man in the truck must have hit the poor creature, stopped to see if he could help, realized he couldn’t, apologized, and left the little girl to grieve. There was nothing I could do, either. Face clenched, I looked back to my side of the street and walked on.

—Jamal Kendal

 Compare-Contrast

To compare and contrast, show how two or more subjects are similar and different.

The old man behind the counter is no doubt Pappy, after which Pappy’s Grocery is named. He leans on the glass display case, world weary and watchful, tracking the youth by the snack display. The folds deepen around Pappy’s intense eyes as the young customer picks lightly at a bag of potato chips, lifts a can of cashews, runs lithe fingers over the packs of gum. He crouches for a better look at the snack cakes, his pants sliding below colorful boxers. Pappy hitches his own belt higher over his tucked-in shirt. “You gonna buy anything?” The young customer startles, looks up with a smooth face and wide eyes, stands, and walks from Pappy’s Grocery.

—Tina Jacobs

as also although both but by contrast

even though however in the same way like likewise one way

on the one hand on the other hand otherwise similarly still yet

Comparison/Contrast

Writing with Sources: Advance and deepen your thesis with reliable reasons and evidence. A typical supporting paragraph starts with a topic sentence and elaborates it with detailed evidence and careful reasoning. Make sure to smoothly integrate quotations into the flow of the writing. Also, avoid dropping in quotations without setting them up and explaining them.

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 Ending Your Draft Closing paragraphs can be important for tying up loose ends, clarifying key points, or signing off with the reader. In a sense, the entire essay is a preparation for an effective ending; the ending helps the reader look back over the essay with new understanding and appreciation. Many endings leave the reader with fresh food for thought.

Advice: Because the ending can be so important, draft a variety of possible endings. Choose the one that flows best from a sense of the whole.

Cautions: ■ If your thesis is weak or unclear, you will have a difficult time writing a satisfactory ending. To strengthen the ending, strengthen the thesis.

■ You may have heard this formula for writing an essay: “Say what you’re going to say, say it, then say what you’ve just said.” Remember, though, if you need to “say what you’ve just said,” say it in new words.

The information on the next two pages will help you develop your ending. You can refer to the sample essays elsewhere in this book for ideas.

Reassert the main point. If an essay is complicated, the reader may need reclarification at the end. Show that you are fulfilling the promises you made in the beginning.

Remind the reader. Recall what you first set out to do; check off the key points you’ve covered; or answer any questions left unanswered. Rephrase the thesis. Restate your thesis in light of the most important support you’ve given. Deepen and expand your original thesis.

Urge the reader. Your reader may still be reluctant to accept your ideas or argument. The ending is your last chance to gain the reader’s acceptance. Here are some possible strategies:

Show the implications. Follow further possibilities raised by your train of thought; be reasonable and convincing. Look ahead. Suggest other possible connections. List the benefits. Show the reader the benefits of accepting or applying the things you’ve said.

InSIght: When your writing comes to an effective stopping point, conclude the essay. Don’t tack on another idea.

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Complete and unify your message. Your final paragraphs are your last opportunity to refocus, unify, and otherwise reinforce your message. Draft the closing carefully, not merely to finish the essay but to further advance your purpose and thesis.

 Weak Ending

The ending below does not focus on and show commitment to the essay’s main idea. Rather than reinforcing this idea, the writing leads off in a new direction.

I realize I’ve got to catch my bus. I’ve spent too much time talking to this woman whose life is a wreck. I give her some spare change and then head off. She doesn’t follow me. It’s kind of a relief. Toronto is a great city, but sometimes you have weird experiences there. Once a street vendor gave me a free falafel. I didn’t want to eat it because maybe something was wrong with it. What a weird city!

 Strong Endings

Below are final paragraphs from two essays in this book. Listen to their tone, watch how they reconsider the essay’s ideas, and note how they offer further food for thought. (The first example is a revision of the weak paragraph above.)

I tell her I need to get going. She should go, too, or she’ll be late for the hearing. Before getting up, I reach into my wallet and give her two TTC passes and some spare change. I walk her to the street and point her toward Old City Hall. She never thanks me, only looks at me one last time with immense vulnerability and helplessness. Then she walks away.

I wonder as I hurry towards the station if she’ll be okay, if her boyfriend really will get out of jail, and if her grandmother will ever take her back. Either way, I think as I cross Bay Street, what more can I do? I have a bus to catch.

(See the full essay on pages 148–150.)

Passion and power permeate all of Latin America’s music. The four major types of music—indigenous, Iberian and Mestizo folk, Afro-American, and popular urban— are as diverse as the people of Latin America, and each style serves a valued need or function in Latinos’ everyday lives. As a result, those listening to Latin American music—whether it is a Peruvian Indian’s chant, a Venezuelan farmer’s whistled tune, a Cuban mambo drummer’s vivacious beat, or the Bogotá rock concert’s compelling rhythms—are hearing much more than music. They are hearing the passion and power of the Latin American people.

Writing with Sources: Save the best for last. Consider using an especially thought- provoking statement, quotation, or detail in your conclusion. Doing so can help you clinch your point.

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Antibiotics are effective only against infections caused by bacteria and should

never be used against infections caused by viruses. Using an antibiotic against a

viral infection is like throwing water on a grease fire—water may normally put out

fires but will only worsen the situation for a grease fire. In the same way, antibiotics

fight infections, but they cause the body harm only when they are used to fight

infections caused by viruses. Viruses cause the common cold, the flu, and most

sore throats, sinus infections, coughs, and bronchitis. Yet antibiotics are commonly

prescribed for these viral infections. The New England Journal of Medicine reports

that 22.7 million kilograms (25,000 tons) of antibiotics is prescribed each year in

the United States alone (Wenzel and Edmond, 1962). Meanwhile, the CDC reports

that approximately 50 percent of those prescriptions are completely unnecessary

(“Antibiotic Overuse” 25). “Every year, tens of millions of prescriptions for

antibiotics are written to treat viral illnesses for which these antibiotics offer no

benefits,” says the CDC’s antimicrobial resistance director David Bell, M.D. (qtd.

in Bren 30). Such mis-prescribing is simply bad medical practice that contributes

to the problem of growing bacterial infection.

Topic sentence: idea elaborat- ing and supporting thesis

Develop- ment of idea through reasoning

Support of idea through reference to source material

Concluding statement of idea

Working with Sources: If you are using sources, take care not to overwhelm your draft with source material. Keep the focus on your own ideas:

■ Avoid strings of references and chunks of source material with no discussion, explanation, or interpretation on your part in between.

■ Don’t offer entire paragraphs of material from a source (whether paraphrased or quoted) with a single in-text citation at the end. When you do so, your thinking disappears.

■ Be careful not to overload your draft with complex information and dense data lacking explanation.

■ Resist the urge to simply copy and paste big chunks from sources. Even if you document the sources, your paper will quickly become a patchwork of source material with a few weak stitches (your contribution) holding it together.

■ Note the careful use of source material in the following paragraph.

Sample Paragraph Showing Integration of Source Material

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Cross-Curricular Connections When next you write a paper in one of your content-area classes, use the tips in this chapter. Afterward, indicate which tip was most helpful and why.

Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities As directed by your instructor, complete the following critical-thinking and writing activities by yourself or with classmates.

1. Patricia T. O’Connor says, “All writing begins life as a first draft, and first drafts are never any good. They’re not supposed to be.” Is this claim true? Why or why not? What do you hope to accomplish with a first draft?

2. Study the chart on page 57. Based on other material you have read or written, add another writing move for each of the three main parts of the essay: opening, middle, and ending. Name the move, explain it, and tell what types of writing it might appear in.

3. Read the final paragraphs of any three essays included in this book. Write a brief analysis of each ending based on the information on pages 67–68.

4. Imagine that you are a journalist who has been asked to write an article about a wedding, a funeral, or another significant event you have experienced. Choose an event and sketch out a plan for your article. Include the main writing moves and the type of information at each stage of your writing.

Learning-Outcomes Checklist I have reconsidered the rhetorical situation, thinking about my role, the subject, my purpose, my audience, the medium, and the context.

I understand the essay structure—opening, middle, and closing.

I have created a strong opening. ■ The opening engages the reader. ■ The opening establishes a focus and states a main point.

I have developed the ideas in the middle of my essay. ■ The middle advances my thesis by developing and testing ideas. ■ The middle orders supporting details in a clear, logical way.

I have created an effective closing. ■ The closing reasserts the main point and completes the message.

I understand how to use sources to best effect in a draft.

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Visually Speaking

The hands in the photo above are shaping a blob of clay into a piece of pottery. How is revising similar to this process? How is it different?

The word revising means “taking another look,” so revising is best done after a brief break. Set aside your writing and return to it later with fresh eyes. Also, enlist the fresh eyes of another reader, whether a roommate, a classmate, or someone at the writing center. Revising is all about getting perspective.

Of course, once you have perspective, you need to figure out how to make improvements. This chapter provides numerous strategies for focusing on the global traits of your writing— ideas, organization, and voice. The changes you make should improve the work significantly, perhaps even reshaping it.

Revising5 Learning Outcomes ▶ Think about your overall

approach.

▶ Think about the global traits. ▶ Revise for ideas and

organization.

▶ Revise for voice and style. ▶ Address paragraph issues. ▶ Revise collaboratively. ▶ Use the writing center.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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 Consider Whole-Paper Issues When revising, first look at the big picture. Take it all in. Determine whether the content is interesting, informative, and worth sharing. Note any gaps or soft spots in your line of thinking. Ask yourself how you can improve what you have done so far. The information that follows will help you address whole-paper issues such as these.

Revisit the rhetorical situation. Just as the rhetorical situation helped you to set your direction in writing, it can help you make course corrections. Think about each part of the rhetorical situation.

Consider your role. How are you coming across in this draft? Do you sound authoritative, engaged, knowledgeable, confident? How do you want to come across?

Think about your subject. Have you stated a clear focus? Have you supported it with a variety of details? Have you explored the subject fully?

Remember your purpose. Are you trying to analyze, describe, explain, propose? Does the writing succeed? Do the ideas promote your purpose? Does your organization support the purpose? Is your writing voice helpful in achieving your purpose?

Check the form. Have you created writing that matches the form that your instructor requested? Have you taken best advantage of the form, including graphics or other media, if appropriate?

Consider your audience. Have you captured their attention and interest? Have you provided them the information they need to understand your writing? Have you considered their values, needs, and opinions, and used them to connect?

Think about the context. Is this piece of writing the correct length and level of seriousness for the assignment? Is it on schedule? How does it match up to what others are doing?

Writing with Sources: Make sure that your sources work well for each part of the rhetorical situation. Choose sources that

■ ref lect well on you, showing that you understand and care about the topic.

■ illuminate the subject with accurate, precise, substantial information.

■ help you achieve your purpose, whether to inform, persuade, or ref lect.

■ work well within the form and can be appropriately credited.

■ are seen as authoritative by the audience.

■ are timely and credible in the context.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 5 Revising 73

Consider your overall approach. Sometimes it’s better to start fresh if your writing contains stretches of uninspired ideas. Consider a fresh start if your first draft shows one of these problems:

The topic is worn-out. An essay titled “Lead Poisoning” may not sound very interesting. Unless you can approach it with a new twist (“Get the Lead Out!”), consider cutting your losses and finding a fresh topic.

The approach is stale. If you’ve been writing primarily to get a good grade, finish the assignment, or sound cool, start again. Try writing to learn something, prompt real thinking in readers, or touch a chord.

Your voice is predictable or fake. Avoid the bland “A good time was had by all” or the phony academic “When one studies this significant problem in considerable depth . . . ” Be real. Be honest.

The draft sounds boring. Maybe it’s boring because you pay an equal amount of attention to everything and hence stress nothing. Try condensing less important material and expanding what’s important.

The essay is formulaic. In other words, it follows the “five-paragraph” format. This handy organizing frame may prevent you from doing justice to your topic and thinking. If your draft is dragged down by rigid adherence to a formula, try a more original approach.

Writing with Sources: Test the balance of reasoning and sources. Make sure your draft is not thin on source material, but also make sure that the source material does not dominate the conversation. Use these tips for balancing reasoning and sources:

1. Before diving into source material within a paragraph or section of your paper, f lesh out your thinking more fully. Offer reasoning that elaborates the claim and effectively leads into the evidence.

2. As you present evidence from source material, build on it by explaining what it means. Evidence doesn’t typically speak for itself: through analysis, synthesis, illustration, contrast, and other means, you need to show how or why your sources advance your thesis.

3. After you have presented evidence that elaborates on and supports your idea, extend your thoughts by addressing the reader’s “So what?” or “Why does this matter?” skepticism.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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 Revising Your First Draft Revising helps you turn your first draft into a more complete, thoughtful piece of writing. The following information will help you do that.

Prepare to revise. Once you’ve finished a first draft, set it aside (ideally for a few days) until you can look at the draft objectively and make needed changes. If you drafted on paper, photocopy the draft. If you drafted on a computer, print your paper (double-spaced). Then make changes with a good pencil or colored pen. If you prefer revising on the computer, consider using your software editing program. In all cases, save your first draft for reference.

Think globally. When revising, focus on the big picture—the overall strength of the ideas, organization, and voice.

Ideas: Check your thesis, focus, or theme. Has your thinking on your topic changed? Also think about your readers’ most pressing questions concerning this topic. Have you answered these questions? Finally, consider your reasoning and support. Are both complete and sound?

Organization: Check the overall design of your writing, making sure that ideas move smoothly and logically from one point to the next. Does your essay build effectively? Do you shift directions cleanly? Fix structural problems in one of these ways:

■ Reorder material to improve the sequence.

■ Cut information that doesn’t support the thesis.

■ Add details where the draft is thin.

■ Rewrite parts that seem unclear.

■ Improve links between points by using transitions.

Voice: Voice is your personal presence on the page, the tone and attitude that others hear when reading your work. In other words, voice is the between-the-lines message your readers get (whether you want them to or not). When revising, make sure that the tone of your message matches your purpose, whether it is serious, playful, or satiric.

InSIght: Don’t pay undue attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation at this early stage in the process. Otherwise, you may become distracted from the task at hand: improving the content of your writing. Editing and proofreading come later.

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 Revising for Ideas and Organization As you review your draft for content, make sure the ideas are fully developed and the organization is clear. From your main claim or thesis to your reasoning and your evidence, strengthen your thinking and sequencing.

Examine your ideas. Review the ideas in your writing, making sure that each point is logical, complete, and clear. To test the logic in your writing, see pages 257–260.

 Complete Thinking

Have you answered readers’ basic questions? Have you supported the thesis? The original passage below is too general; the revision is clearly more complete.

Original Passage (Too general)

As soon as you receive a minor cut, the body’s healing process begins to work. Blood from tiny vessels fills the wound and begins to clot. In less than 24 hours, a scab forms.

Revised Version (More specific)

As soon as you receive a minor cut, the body’s healing process begins to work. In a simple wound, the first and second layers of skin are severed along with tiny blood vessels called capillaries. As these vessels bleed into the wound, minute structures called platelets help stop the bleeding by sticking to the edges of the cut and to one another, forming a plug. The platelets then release chemicals that react with certain proteins in the blood to form a clot. The blood clot, with its fiber network, begins to join the edges of the wound together. As the clot dries out, a scab forms, usually in less than 24 hours.

 Clear Thesis

Make sure that your writing centers on one main issue or thesis. Although this next original passage lacks a thesis, the revision has a clear one.

Original Passage (Lacks a thesis)

Teen magazines are popular with young girls. These magazines contain a lot of how-to articles about self-image, fashion, and boy-girl relationships. Girls read them to get advice on how to act and how to look. Girls who don’t really know what they want are the most eager readers.

Revised Version (Identifies a specific thesis statement)

Adolescent girls often see teen magazines as handbooks on how to be teenagers. These magazines influence the ways they act and the ways they look. For girls who are unsure of themselves, these magazines can exert an enormous amount of influence. Unfortunately, the advice these magazines give about self-image, fashion, and boys may do more harm than good.

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Examine your organization. Good writing has structure. It leads readers logically and clearly from one point to the next. When revising for organization, consider four areas: the overall plan, the opening, the flow of ideas, and the closing.

 Overall Plan

Look closely at the sequence of ideas or events that you share. Does that sequence advance your thesis? Do the points build effectively? Are there gaps in the support or points that stray from your original purpose? If you find such problems, consider the following actions:

■ Refine the focus or emphasis by rearranging material within the text.

■ Fill in the gaps with new material. Go back to your planning notes.

■ Delete material that wanders away from your purpose.

■ Use an additional (or different) method of organization. For example, if you are comparing two subjects, add depth to your analysis by contrasting them as well. If you are describing a complex subject, show the subject more clearly and fully by distinguishing and classifying its parts. (See pages 62–69 for more on organizational methods.)

InSIght: What is the best method of organization for your essay? The writing you are doing will usually determine the choice. As you know, a personal narrative is often organized by time. Typically, however, you combine and customize methods to develop a writing idea. For example, within a comparison essay you may do some describing or classifying. See pages 46–47 and 117 for more on the common methods of development.

 Opening Ideas

Reread your opening paragraph(s). Is the opening organized effectively? Does it engage readers, establish a direction for your writing, and express your thesis or focus? The original opening below doesn’t build to a compelling thesis statement, but the revised version engages the reader and leads to the thesis.

Original Opening (Lacks interest and direction)

The lack of student motivation is a common subject in the news. Educators want to know how to get students to learn. Today’s higher standards mean that students will be expected to learn even more. Another problem in urban areas is that large numbers of students are dropping out. How to interest students is a challenge.

Revised Version (Effectively leads readers into the essay)

How can we motivate students to learn? How can we get them to meet today’s rising standards of excellence? How can we, in fact, keep students in school long enough to learn? The answer to these problems is quite simple. Give them money. Pay students to study and learn and stay in school.

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Chapter 5 Revising 77

 Flow of Ideas

Look closely at the beginnings and endings of each paragraph. Have you connected your thoughts clearly? (See page 86 for a list of transition words.) The original opening words of the paragraph sequence below, from an essay of description, offer no links for readers. The revised versions use strong transitions indicating spatial organization (order by location).

Original First Words in the Four Middle Paragraphs

There was a huge, steep hill . . . Buffalo Creek ran . . . A dense “jungle” covering . . . Within walking distance from my house . . .

Revised Versions (Words and phrases connect ideas)

Behind the house, there was a huge, steep hill . . . Across the road from the house, Buffalo Creek ran . . . On the far side of the creek bank was a dense “jungle” covering . . . Up the road, within walking distance from my house . . .

InSIght: Review “Supporting Your Claims” (pages 254–256) and use those strategies to strengthen weak or unconvincing passages.

 Closing Ideas

Reread your closing paragraph(s). Do you offer an effective summary, reassert your main point in a fresh way, and provide readers with food for thought as they leave your writing? Or is your ending abrupt, repetitive, or directionless? The original ending below is uninspiring; it adds little to the main part of the writing. The revision summarizes the main points in the essay and then urges the reader to think again about the overall point of writing.

Original Ending (Sketchy and flat)

Native Son deals with a young man’s struggle against racism. It shows the effects of prejudice. Everyone should read this book.

Revised Version (Effectively ends the writing)

Native Son deals with a young man’s struggle in a racist society, but also with so much more. It shows how prejudice affects people, how it closes in on them, and what some people will do to find a way out. Anyone who wants to better understand racism in the United States should read this book.

TIP: To generate fresh ideas for your closing, freewrite answers to questions like these: Why is the topic important to me? What should my readers have learned? Why should this issue matter to readers? What evidence or appeal (pages 262–263) will help readers remember my message and act on it? How does the topic relate to broader issues in society, history, or life?

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 Revising for Voice and Style Generally, readers more fully trust writing that speaks in an informed voice and a clear, natural style. To develop an informed voice, make sure that your details are correct and complete; to develop a clear style, make sure that your writing is well organized and unpretentious. Check the issues below. (For a definition of voice, see page 74.)

Check the level of commitment. Consider how and to what degree your writing shows that you care about the topic and reader. For example, note how the original passage below lacks a personal voice, revealing nothing about the writer’s connection to—or interest in—the topic. In contrast, the revision shows that the writer cares about the topic.

Original Passage (Lacks voice)

Cemeteries can teach us a lot about history. They make history seem more real. There is an old grave of a Revolutionary War veteran in the Union Grove Cemetery. . . .

Revised Version (Personal, sincere voice)

I’ve always had a special feeling for cemeteries. It’s hard to explain any further than that, except to say history never seems quite as real as it does when I walk among many old gravestones. One day I discovered the grave of a Revolutionary War veteran. . . .

Original Passage (Lacks feeling and energy)

The Dream Act could make a difference for people. It just takes a long time to get any bill through Congress. This bill probably will never get approved. Instead of passing the Dream Act, the country will probably just deport high school students from other countries.

Revised Passage (Expresses real feelings)

Given such debates, it might be a long time before the bill becomes law, thereby dashing the dreams of nearly 65,000 high school students like Maria who can’t wait another year because they may already be in deportation proceedings. We need to step up and educate our representatives and senators about the importance of passing the Dream Act on its own instead of including the bill along with CIR. We need to urge them to debate and approve the Dream Act now, thereby making Maria’s dreams—and the dreams of thousands of students like her—a reality!

Check the intensity of your writing. All writing—including academic writing—is enriched by an appropriate level of intensity, or even passion. In the original passage below, the writer’s concern for the topic is unclear because the piece sounds neutral. In contrast, the revised version exudes energy.

Audio Video ModelWeb Link Exercise Interactive

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Chapter 5 Revising 79

Develop an academic style. Most college writing requires an academic style. Such a style isn’t stuffy; you’re not trying to impress readers with ten-dollar words. Rather, you are using language that facilitates a thoughtful, engaged discussion of the topic. To choose the best words for such a conversation, consider the issues that follow.

 Personal Pronouns

In some academic writing, personal pronouns are acceptable. Such is the case in informal writing, such as reading responses, personal essays involving narration, description, and reflection, and opinion-editorial essays written for a broad audience. In addition, I is correctly used in academic writing rooted in personal research, sometimes called an I-search paper.

Generally, however, avoid using I, we, and you in traditional academic writing. The concept, instead, is to focus on the topic itself and let your attitude be revealed indirectly. As E. B. White puts it, “To achieve style, begin by affecting none—that is, begin by placing yourself in the background.”

No: I really think that the problem of the homeless in Chicago is serious, given the number of people who are dying, as I know from my experience where I grew up.

Yes: Homelessness in Chicago often leads to death. This fact demands the attention of more than lawmakers and social workers; all citizens must address the problems of their suffering neighbors.

TIP: Use the pronoun one carefully in academic prose. When it means “a person,” one can lead to a stilted style if overused. In addition, the pronoun their (a plural pronoun) should not be used with one (a singular pronoun).

 Technical Terms and Jargon

Technical terms and jargon—“insider” words—can be the specialized vocabulary of a subject, a discipline, a profession, or a social group. As such, jargon can be difficult to read for “outsiders.” Follow these guidelines:

■ Use technical terms to communicate with people within the profession or discipline as a kind of shorthand. However, be careful that such jargon doesn’t devolve into meaningless buzzwords and catchphrases.

■ Avoid jargon when writing for readers outside the profession or discipline. Use simpler terms and define technical terms that must be used.

Technical: Bin’s Douser power washer delivers 2200 psi p.r., runs off standard a.c. lines, comes with 100 ft. h.d. synthetic-rubber tubing, and features variable pulsation options through three adjustable s.s. tips.

Simple: Bin’s Douser power washer has a pressure rating of 2200 psi (pounds per square inch), runs off a common 200-volt electrical circuit, comes with 100 feet of hose, and includes three nozzles.

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 Level of Formality

Most academic writing (especially research papers, literary analyses, lab reports, and argumentative essays) should meet the standards of formal English. Formal English is characterized by a serious tone; careful attention to word choice; longer and more complex sentences reflecting complex thinking; strict adherence to traditional conventions of grammar, mechanics, and punctuation; and avoidance of contractions.

Formal English, modeled in this sentence, is worded correctly and carefully so that it can withstand repeated readings without seeming tiresome, sloppy, or cute.

You may write other papers (personal essays, commentaries, journals, and reviews) in which informal English is appropriate. Informal English is characterized by a personal tone, the occasional use of popular expressions, shorter sentences with slightly looser syntax, contractions, and personal references (I, we, you), but it still adheres to basic conventions.

Informal English sounds like one person talking to another person (in a somewhat relaxed setting). It’s the type of language that you’re reading now. It sounds comfortable and real, not affected or breezy.

TIP: In academic writing, generally avoid slang—words considered outside standard English because they are faddish, familiar to few people, and sometimes insulting.

 Unnecessary Qualifiers

Using qualifiers (such as mostly, often, likely, or tends to) is an appropriate strategy for developing defendable claims in argumentative writing. (See pages 252–253.) However, when you “overqualify” your ideas or add intensifiers (really, truly), the result is insecurity—the impression that you lack confidence in your ideas. The cure? Say what you mean, and mean what you say.

Insecure: I totally and completely agree with the new security measures at sporting events, but that’s only my opinion.

Secure: I agree with the new security measures at sporting events.

FYI Each academic discipline has its own vocabulary and its own vocabulary resources. Such resources include dictionaries, glossaries, or handbooks. Check your library for the vocabulary resources in your discipline. Use them regularly to deepen your grasp of that vocabulary.

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Chapter 5 Revising 81

Know when to use the passive voice. Most verbs can be in either the active or the passive voice. When a verb is active, the sentence’s subject performs the action. When the verb is passive, the subject is acted upon.

Active: If you can’t attend the meeting, notify Richard by Thursday.

Passive: If a meeting can’t be attended by you, Richard must be notified by Thursday.

Weaknesses of Passive Voice: The passive voice tends to be wordy and sluggish because the verb’s action is directed backward, not ahead. In addition, passive constructions tend to be impersonal, making people disappear.

Passive: The sound system can now be used to listen in on sessions in the therapy room. Parents can be helped by having constructive one-on- one communication methods with children modeled by therapists.

Active: Parents can now use the sound system to listen in on sessions in the therapy room. Therapists can help parents by modeling constructive one-on-one communication methods with children.

Strengths of Passive Voice: Using the passive voice isn’t wrong. In fact, the passive voice has some important uses: (1) when you need to be tactful (say, in a bad-news letter), (2) if you wish to stress the object or person acted upon, and (3) if the actual actor is understood, unknown, or unimportant.

Active: Our engineers determined that you bent the bar at the midpoint.

Passive: Our engineers determined that the bar had been bent at the midpoint. (tactful)

Active: Congratulations! We have approved your scholarship for $2,500.

Passive: Congratulations! Your scholarship for $2,500 has been approved. (emphasis on receiver; actor understood)

TIP: Avoid using the passive voice unethically to hide responsibility. For example, an instructor who says, “Your assignments could not be graded because of scheduling difficulties,” might be trying to evade the truth: “I did not finish grading your assignments because I was watching CSI.”

Writing with Sources:Academic writing must be free of plagiarism. Check that you have clearly indicated which material in your draft is summarized, paraphrased, or quoted from another source. (For more help, see pages 436–438.)

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 Addressing Paragraph Issues While drafting, you may have constructed paragraphs that are loosely held together, poorly developed, or unclear. When you revise, take a close look at your paragraphs for focus, unity, and coherence (pages 83–85).

Remember the basics. A paragraph should be a concise unit of thought. Revise a paragraph until it . . .

■ is organized around a controlling idea—often stated in a topic sentence.

■ consists of supporting sentences that develop the controlling idea.

■ concludes with a sentence that summarizes the main point and prepares readers for the next paragraph or main point.

■ serves a specific function in a piece of writing—opening, supporting, developing, illustrating, countering, describing, or closing.

Sample Paragraph

Keep the purpose in mind. Use these questions to evaluate the purpose and function of each paragraph:

■ What function does the paragraph fulfill? How does it add to your line of reasoning or the development of your thesis?

■ Would the paragraph work better if it were divided in two—or combined with another paragraph?

■ Does the paragraph f low smoothly from the previous paragraph, and does it lead effectively into the next one?

Tumor cells can hurt the body in a number of ways. First, a tumor can grow so big

that it takes up space needed by other organs. Second, some cells may detach from the

original tumor and spread throughout the body, creating new tumors elsewhere. This

happens with lymphatic cancer—a cancer that’s hard to control because it spreads so

quickly. A third way that tumor cells can hurt the body is by doing work not called

for in their DNA. For example, a gland cell’s DNA code may tell the cell to produce a

necessary hormone in the endocrine system. However, if cancer damages or distorts

that code, sick cells may produce more of the hormone than the body can use—or

even tolerate (Braun 4). Cancer cells seem to have minds of their own, and this is why

cancer is such a serious disease.

Topic sentence

Supporting sentences

Closing sentence

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Check for unity. A unified paragraph is one in which all the details help to develop a single main topic or achieve a single main effect. Test for unity by following these guidelines.

 Topic Sentence

Very often the topic of a paragraph is stated in a single sentence called a “topic sentence.” Check whether your paragraph needs a topic sentence. If the paragraph has a topic sentence, determine whether it is clear, specific, and well focused. Here is a formula for writing good topic sentences:

Formula: A topic sentence = a limited topic + a specific feeling or thought about it.

Example: The fear that Americans feel (limited topic) comes partly from the uncertainty related to this attack (a specific thought).

 Placement of the Topic Sentence

Normally the topic sentence is the first sentence in the paragraph. However, it can appear elsewhere in a paragraph.

Middle Placement: Place a topic sentence in the middle when you want to build up to and then lead away from the key idea.

During the making of Apocalypse Now, Eleanor Coppola created a documentary about the filming called Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse. In the first film, the insane Colonel Kurtz has disappeared into the Cambodian jungle. As Captain Willard searches for Kurtz, the screen fills with horror. however, as Hearts of Darkness relates, the horror portrayed in the fictional movie was being lived out by the production company. For example, in the documentary, actor Larry Fishburne shockingly says, “War is fun. . . . Vietnam must have been so much fun.” Then toward the end of the filming, actor Martin Sheen suffered a heart attack. When an assistant informed investors, the director exploded, “He’s not dead unless I say he’s dead.”

End Placement: Place a topic sentence at the end when you want to build to a climax, as in a passage of narration or persuasion.

When sportsmen stop to reflect on why they find fishing so enjoyable, most realize that what they love is the feel of a fish on the end of the line, not necessarily the weight of the fillets in their coolers. Fishing has undergone a slow evolution over the last century. While fishing used to be a way of putting food on the table, most of today’s fishermen do so only for the relaxation that it provides. The barbed hook was invented to increase the quantity of fish a man could land so that he could better feed his family. this need no longer exists, so barbed hooks are no longer necessary.

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 Supporting Sentences

All the sentences in the body of a paragraph should support the topic sentence. The closing sentence, for instance, will often summarize the paragraph’s main point or emphasize a key detail. If any sentences shift the focus away from the topic, revise the paragraph in one of the following ways:

■ Delete the material from the paragraph.

■ Rewrite the material so that it clearly supports the topic sentence.

■ Create a separate paragraph based on the odd-man-out material.

■ Revise the topic sentence so that it relates more closely to the support.

 Consistent Focus

Examine the following paragraph about fishing hooks. The original topic sentence focuses on the point that some anglers prefer smooth hooks. However, the writer leaves this initial idea unfinished and turns to the issue of the cost of new hooks. In the revised version, unity is restored: The first paragraph completes the point about anglers who prefer smooth hooks; the second paragraph addresses the issue of replacement costs.

Original Paragraph (Lacks unity)

According to some anglers who do use smooth hooks, their lures perform better than barbed lures as long as they maintain a constant tension on the line. Smooth hooks can bite deeper than barbed hooks, actually providing a stronger hold on the fish. Some people have argued that replacing all of the barbed hooks in their tackle would be a costly operation.

Revised Version (Unified)

According to some anglers who do use smooth hooks, their lures perform better than barbed lures as long as the anglers maintain a constant tension on the line. Smooth hooks can bite deeper than barbed hooks, actually providing a stronger hold on the fish. These anglers testify that switching from barbed hooks has not noticeably reduced the number of fish that they are able to land. In their experience, and in my own, enjoyment of the sport is actually heightened by adding another challenge to playing the fish (maintaining line tension).

Some people have argued that replacing all of the barbed hooks in their tackle would be a costly operation. While this is certainly a concern, barbed hooks do not necessarily require replacement. With a simple set of pliers, the barbs on most conventional hooks can be bent down, providing a cost-free method of modifying one’s existing tackle. . . .

Paragraphs that contain unrelated ideas lack unity and are hard to follow. As you review each paragraph for unity, ask yourself these questions: Is the topic of the paragraph clear? Does each sentence relate to the topic? Are the sentences organized in the best possible order?

fyi

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Chapter 5 Revising 85

Check for coherence. When a paragraph is coherent, the parts stay together. A coherent paragraph flows smoothly because each sentence is connected to others by patterns in the language such as repetition and transitions. To strengthen the coherence in your paragraphs, check for the issues discussed below.

 Effective Repetition

To achieve coherence in your paragraphs, consider using repetition—repeating words or synonyms where necessary to remind readers of what you have already said. You can also use parallelism—repeating phrase or sentence structures to show the relationships among ideas. At the same time, you will add a unifying rhythm to your writing.

Ineffective: The floor was littered with discarded soda cans, newspapers that were crumpled, and wrinkled clothes.

Effective: the floor was littered with discarded soda cans, crumpled newspapers, and wrinkled clothes. (Three parallel phrases are used.)

Ineffective: Reading the book was enjoyable; to write the critique was difficult.

Effective: Reading the book was enjoyable; writing the critique was difficult. (Two similar structures are repeated.)

 Clear Transitions

Linking words and phrases like “next,” “on the other hand,” and “in addition” connect ideas by showing the relationship among them. There are transitions that show location and time, compare and contrast things, emphasize a point, conclude or summarize, and add or clarify information. (See page 86 for a list of linking words and phrases.) Note the use of transitions in the following examples:

The paradox of Scotland is that violence had long been the norm in this now- peaceful land. In fact, the country was born, bred, and came of age in war. (The transition is used to emphasize a point.)

The production of cement is a complicated process. First, the mixture of lime, silica, alumina, and gypsum is ground into very fine particles. (The transition is used to show time or order.)

InSIght: Another way to achieve coherence in your paragraphs is to use pronouns effectively. A pronoun forms a link to the noun it replaces and ties that noun (idea) to the ideas that follow. As always, don’t overuse pronouns or rely too heavily on them in establishing coherence in your paragraphs.

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 Transitions and Linking Words

The words and phrases below can help you tie together words, phrases, sentences, and paragraphs.

Words used to show location: above behind down on top of across below in back of onto against beneath in front of outside along beside inside over among between into throughout around beyond near to the right away from by off under

Words used to show time: about during next today after finally next week tomorrow afterward first second until as soon as immediately soon when at later then yesterday before meanwhile third

Words used to compare things (show similarities): also in the same way likewise as like similarly

Words used to contrast things (show differences): although even though on the other hand still but however otherwise yet

Words used to emphasize a point: again for this reason particularly to repeat even in fact to emphasize truly

Words used to conclude or summarize: all in all finally in summary therefore as a result in conclusion last to sum up

Words used to add information: additionally and equally important in addition again another finally likewise along with as well for example next also besides for instance second

Words used to clarify: for instance in other words put another way that is

Note: Use transitions to link, expand, or intensify an idea, but don’t add elements carelessly, creating run-on or rambling sentences (pages 662–664).

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Chapter 5 Revising 87

Check for completeness. The sentences in a paragraph should support and expand on the main point. If your paragraph does not seem complete, you will need to add information.

Supporting Details

If some of your paragraphs are incomplete, they may lack details. There are numerous kinds of details, including the following:

facts anecdotes analyses paraphrases

statistics quotations explanations comparisons

examples definitions summaries analogies

Add details based on the type of writing you are engaged in.

Describing: Add details that help readers see, smell, taste, touch, or hear it. Narrating: Add details that help readers understand the events and actions. Explaining: Add details that help readers understand what it means, how it works, or

what it does. Persuading: Add details that strengthen the logic of your argument.

Specific Details

The original paragraph below fails to answer fully the question posed by the topic sentence. In the revised paragraph, the writer uses an anecdote to answer the question.

Original Paragraph (Lacks completeness)

So what is stress? Actually, the physiological characteristics of stress are some of the body’s potentially good self-defense mechanisms. People experience stress when they are in danger. In fact, stress can be healthy.

Revised Version (Full development)

So what is stress? Actually, the physiological characteristics of stress are some of the body’s potentially good self-defense mechanisms. Take, for example, a man who is crossing a busy intersection when he spots an oncoming car. Immediately his brain releases a flood of adrenaline into his bloodstream. As a result, his muscles contract, his eyes dilate, his heart pounds faster, his breathing quickens, and his blood clots more readily. Each one of these responses helps the man leap out of the car’s path. His muscles contract to give him exceptional strength. His eyes dilate so that he can see more clearly. His heart pumps more blood and his lungs exchange more air—both to increase his metabolism. If the man were injured, his blood would clot faster, ensuring a smaller amount of blood loss. In this situation and many more like it, stress symptoms are good (Curtis 25–26).

InSIght: If a paragraph is getting long, divide it at a natural stopping point. The topic sentence can then function as the thesis for that part of your essay or paper.

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Working with Sources: Test your evidence to make certain that it provides the support you need.

■ accurate: The information is all correct.

■ precise: The data are concrete and specific, not vague and general.

■ substantial: The amount of evidence reaches a critical mass—enough to convey the idea and convince readers of its validity.

■ authoritative: The evidence comes from a reliable source. Moreover, the information is as close to the origin as possible; it is not a report conveying thirdhand or fourthhand information.

■ representative: The information fairly represents the range of data on the issue. Your presentation of evidence is balanced.

■ fitting: Given your purpose, the topic, and your reader, the evidence is appropriate and relevant for the question or issue you are discussing.

The reference page below comes from the APA paper, “Our Roots Go Back to Roanoke (see pages 547–557).” Note how student writer Renee Danielle Singh used a variety of sources that meet the criteria listed above.

Journal article

Book

Proceedings feature

Our Roots 12

References

Beltrane, T., & McQueen, D. V. (1979). Urban and rural Indian drinking

patterns: The special case of the Lumbee. International Journal of the

Addictions, 14(4), 533–548.

Blu, K. I. (1980). The Lumbee problem: The making of an American Indian

People. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

Bryant, A., Goins, R. T., Bell, R., Herrell, R., Manson, S. M., & Buchwald,

D. (2004). Health differences among Lumbee Indians using public and

private sources of care. Journal of Rural Health, 20 (3), 231–236.

Bryant, A., & LaFromboise, T. D. (2005). The racial identity and cultural

orientation of Lumbee American Indian high school students. Cultural

Diversity & Ethnic Minority Psychology, 11(1), 82–89.

Grier, J. O., Ruderman, R. J., & Johnson, A. H. (1979). HLA profile in the

Lumbee Indians of North Carolina. Transplant Proceedings, 11(4), 1767–

1769.

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Chapter 5 Revising 89

 Revising Collaboratively Every writer can benefit from feedback from an interested audience, especially one that offers constructive and honest advice during a writing project. Members of an existing writing group already know how valuable it is for writers to share their work. Others might want to start a writing group to experience the benefits. Your group might collaborate online or in person. In either case, the information on the next two pages will help you get started.

Know your role. Writers and reviewers should know their roles and fulfill their responsibilities during revising sessions. Essentially, the writer should briefly introduce the draft and solicit honest responses. Reviewers should make constructive comments in response to the writing.

Provide appropriate feedback. Feedback can take many forms, including the three approaches described here.

Basic Description: In this simple response, the reviewer listens or reads attentively and then simply describes what she or he hears or sees happening in the piece. The reviewer offers no criticism of the writing.

Ineffective: “That was interesting. The piece was informative.”

Effective: “First, the essay introduced the challenge of your birth defect and how you have had to cope with it. Then in the next part you . . .”

Summary Evaluation: Here the reviewer reads or listens to the piece and then provides a specific evaluation of the draft.

Ineffective: “Gee, I really liked it!” or “It was boring.”

Effective: “Your story at the beginning really pulled me in, and the middle explained the issue strongly, but the ending felt a bit flat.”

Thorough Critique: The reviewer assesses the ideas, organization, and voice in the writing. Feedback should be detailed and constructive. Such a critique may also be completed with the aid of a review sheet or checklist. As a reviewer, be prepared to share specific responses, suggestions, and questions. But also be sure to focus your comments on the writing, rather than the writer.

Ineffective: “You really need to fix that opening! What were you thinking?”

Effective: “Let’s look closely at the opening. Could you rewrite the first sentence so it grabs the reader’s attention? Also, I’m somewhat confused about the thesis statement. Could you rephrase it so it states your position more clearly?”

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Respond according to a plan. Using a specific plan or scheme like the following will help you give clear, helpful, and complete feedback.

OAQS Method: Use this simple four-step scheme—Observe, Appreciate, Question, and Suggest—to respond to your peers’ writing.

1. Observe means to notice what another person’s essay is designed to do and say something about its design or purpose. For example, you might say, “Even though you are writing about your boyfriend, it appears that you are trying to get a message across to your parents.”

2. Appreciate means to praise something in the writing that impresses or pleases you. You can find something to appreciate in any piece of writing. For example, you might say, “You make a very convincing point” or “With your description, I can actually see his broken tooth.”

3. Question means to ask whatever you want to know after you’ve read the essay. You might ask for background information, a definition, an interpretation, or an explanation. For example, you might say, “Can you tell us what happened when you got to the emergency room?”

4. Suggest means to give helpful advice about possible changes. For example, you might say, “With a little more physical detail—especially more sounds and smells—your third paragraph could be the highlight of the whole essay. What do you think?”

Asking the Writer Questions

Reviewers should ask the following types of questions while reviewing a piece of writing:

■ To help writers reflect on their purpose and audience . . . Why are you writing this?

Who will read this, and what do they need to know? ■ To help writers focus their thoughts . . . What message are you trying to get across?

Do you have more than one main point? What are the most important examples?

■ To help writers think about their information . . . What do you know about the subject?

Does this part say enough? Does your writing cover all of the basics (Who? What? Where? When? Why? and How?)?

■ To help writers with their openings and closings . . . What are you trying to say in the opening?

How else could you start your writing? How do you want your readers to feel at the end?

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Chapter 5 Revising 91

 Using the Writing Center A college writing center or lab is a place where a trained adviser will help you develop and strengthen a piece of writing. You can expect the writing center adviser to do certain things; other things only you can do. For quick reference, refer to the chart below.

TIPS for getting the most out of the writing center ■ Visit the center at least several days before your paper is due.

■ Take your assignment sheet with you to each advising session.

■ Read your work aloud, slowly.

■ Expect to rethink your writing from scratch.

■ Do not defend your wording—if it needs defense, it needs revision.

■ Ask questions. (No question is “too dumb.”)

■ Request clarification of anything you don’t understand.

■ Ask for examples or illustrations of important points.

■ Write down all practical suggestions.

■ Ask the adviser to summarize his or her remarks.

■ Rewrite as soon as possible after—or even during—the advising session.

■ Return to the writing center for a response to your revisions.

Adviser’s Job Your Job

Make you feel at home . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Be respectful Discuss your needs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Be ready to work Help you choose a topic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Decide on a topic Discuss your purpose and audience . . . . . . . . . . . . . Know your purpose and audience Help you generate ideas . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Embrace the best ideas Help you develop your logic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Consider other points of view;

stretch your own perspective Help you understand how to research your material . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Do the research Read your draft . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Share your writing Identify problems in organization, logic, expression, and format . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Recognize and fix problems Teach ways to correct weaknesses . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Learn important principles Help you with grammar, usage, diction, vocabulary, and mechanics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Correct all errors

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Cross-Curricular Connections As you write papers for your major, make sure to use types of evidence and methods of analysis that the discipline accepts and values.

Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities As directed by your instructor, complete the following critical-thinking and writing activities by yourself or with classmates.

1. Doris Lessing has stated that when it comes to writing, “The more a thing cooks, the better.” In what sense is revision a crucial stage in that cooking process? Using Lessing’s cooking metaphor as a starting point, explore how revision should function in your own writing.

2. Review the opening and closing paragraphs of one of your essays. Then come up with fresh and different approaches for those paragraphs using the information on pages 76–77 as a guide.

3. For your current writing assignment, ask a peer to provide detailed feedback using the information in this chapter as a guide. Then take a fresh copy of your paper to the writing center and work through your draft with an adviser. Revise the draft as needed.

Learning-Outcomes Checklist I have thought about my overall approach, reconsidering the rhetorical situation—my role, subject, purpose, form, audience, and context.

I have thought about the three global traits: ideas, organization, and voice.

I have revised for ideas and organization. ■ Ideas: I have a clear thesis and have provided excellent support. ■ Organization: I have an opening, a middle, and a closing, and I use a

consistent pattern of organization.

I have revised for voice and style. ■ Voice: My voice works well for all parts of the rhetorical situation.

I have made sure paragraphs are unified, coherent, and complete.

I have gotten a peer review and have helped others revise.

I have made use of the writing center as needed.

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Verb A verb shows action (pondered, grins), links words (is, seemed), or accompanies another action verb as an auxiliary or helping verb (can, does).

Harry honked the horn. (shows action) Harry is impatient. (links words) Harry was honking the truck’s horn. (accompanies the verb honking)

Classes of Verbs Verbs are classified as action, auxiliary (helping), or linking (state of being).

Action Verbs: Transitive and Intransitive As its name implies, an action verb shows action. Some action verbs are transitive; others are intransitive. (The term action does not always refer to a physical activity.)

Rain splashed the windshield. (transitive verb) Josie drove off the road. (intransitive verb)

Transitive verbs have direct objects that receive the action (625.2, 647.5).

The health care industry employs more than 7 million workers in the United States. (Workers is the direct object of the action verb employs.)

Intransitive verbs communicate action that is complete in itself. They do not need an object to receive the action.

My new college roommate smiles and laughs a lot.

Note: Some verbs can be either transitive or intransitive. Ms. Hull teaches physiology and microbiology. (transitive) She teaches well. (intransitive)

Auxiliary (Helping) Verbs Auxiliary verbs (helping verbs) help to form some of the tenses (634.1), the mood (635.2), and the voice (635.1) of the main verb. In the following example, the auxiliary verbs are in bold, and the main verbs are in italics.

I believe, I have always believed, and I will always believe in private enterprise as the backbone of economic well-being in America. —Franklin D. Roosevelt

632.1

632.2

632.3

Common auxiliary Verbs

am been could does have might should will are being did had is must was would be can do has may shall were

esl Note: “Be” auxiliary verbs are always followed by either a verb ending in ing or a past participle. Also see “Common Modal Auxiliary Verbs” (677.2).

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Common linking Verbs

am are be become been being is was were

additional linking Verbs

appear feel look seem sound grow remain smell taste

Linking (State of Being) Verbs A linking verb is a special form of intransitive verb that links the subject of a sentence to a noun, a pronoun, or an adjective in the predicate. (See the chart below.)

The streets are flooded. (adjective) The streets are rivers! (noun)

633.1

Note: The verbs listed as “additional linking verbs” above function as linking verbs when they do not show actual action. An adjective usually follows these linking verbs.

The thunder sounded ominous. (adjective) My little brother grew frightened. (adjective)

Note: When these same words are used as action verbs, an adverb or a direct object may follow them.

I looked carefully at him. (adverb) My little brother grew corn for a science project. (direct object)

Forms of Verbs A verb’s form differs depending on its number (singular, plural), person (first, second, third), tense (present, past, future, present perfect, past perfect, future perfect), voice (active, passive), and mood (indicative, imperative, subjunctive).

Number of a Verb Number indicates whether a verb is singular or plural. The verb and its subject both must be singular, or they both must be plural. (See “Subject–Verb Agreement,” pages 655–658.)

My college enrolls high schoolers in summer programs. (singular) Many colleges enroll high schoolers in summer courses. (plural)

Person of a Verb Person indicates whether the subject of the verb is first, second, or third person. The verb and its subject must be in the same person. Verbs usually have a different form only in third person singular of the present tense.

633.2

633.3

first person Second person third person Singular I think you think he/she/it thinks plural we think you think they think

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Tense of a Verb Tense indicates the time of an action or state of being. There are three basic tenses (past, present, and future) and three verbal aspects (progressive, perfect, and perfect progressive).

Present Tense Present tense expresses action happening at the present time or regularly.

In the United States, more than 75 percent of workers hold service jobs.

Present progressive tense also expresses action that is happening continually, in an ongoing fashion at the present time, but it is formed by combining am, are, or is and the present participle (ending in ing) of the main verb.

More women than ever before are working outside the home.

Present perfect tense expresses action that began in the past and has recently been completed or that continues up to the present time.

My sister has taken four years of swimming lessons.

Present perfect progressive tense also expresses an action that began in the past but stresses the continuing nature of the action. Like the present progressive tense, it is formed by combining auxiliary verbs (have been or has been) and present participles.

She has been taking them since she was six years old.

Past Tense Past tense expresses action that was completed at a particular time in the past.

A hundred years ago, more than 75 percent of laborers worked in agriculture.

Past progressive tense expresses past action that continued over an interval of time. It is formed by combining was or were with the present participle of the main verb.

A century ago, my great-grandparents were farming.

Past perfect tense expresses an action in the past that was completed at a specific time before another past action occurred.

By the time we sat down for dinner, my cousins had eaten all the olives.

Past perfect progressive tense expresses a past action but stresses the continuing nature of the action. It is formed by using had been along with the present participle.

They had been eating the olives all afternoon.

Future Tense Future tense expresses action that will take place in the future.

Next summer I will work as a lifeguard.

Future progressive tense expresses an action that will be continuous in the future.

I will be working for the park district at North Beach.

Future perfect tense expresses future action that will be completed by a specific time.

By 10:00 p.m., I will have completed my research project.

Future perfect progressive tense also expresses future action that will be completed by a specific time but (as with other perfect progressive tenses) stresses the action’s continuous nature. It is formed using will have been along with the present participle.

I will have been researching the project for three weeks by the time it’s due.

634.1

634.2

634.3

634.4

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Voice of a Verb Voice indicates whether the subject is acting or being acted upon.

Active voice indicates that the subject of the verb is performing the action.

People update their resumés on a regular basis. (The subject, People, is acting; resumés is the direct object.)

Passive voice indicates that the subject of the verb is being acted upon or is receiving the action. A passive verb is formed by combining a be verb with a past participle.

Your resumé should be updated on a regular basis. (The subject, resumé, is receiving the action.)

635.1

using active Voice Generally, use active voice rather than passive voice for more direct, energetic writing. To change your passive sentences to active ones, do the following: First, find the noun that is doing the action and make it the subject. Then find the word that had been the subject and use it as the direct object.

passive: The winning goal was scored by Eva. (The subject, goal, is not acting.) active: Eva scored the winning goal. (The subject, Eva, is acting.)

Note: When you want to emphasize the receiver more than the doer—or when the doer is unknown—use the passive voice. (Much technical and scientific writing regularly uses the passive voice.)

Mood of a Verb The mood of a verb indicates the tone or attitude with which a statement is made.

Indicative mood, the most common, is used to state a fact or to ask a question.

Can any theme capture the essence of the complex 1960s culture? President John F. Kennedy’s directive [stated below] represents one ideal popular during that decade.

Imperative mood is used to give a command. (The subject of an imperative sentence is you, which is usually understood and not stated in the sentence.)

ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country. —John F. Kennedy

Subjunctive mood is used to express a wish, an impossibility or unlikely condition, or a necessity. The subjunctive mood is often used with if or that. The verb forms below create an atypical subject–verb agreement, forming the subjunctive mood.

If I were rich, I would travel for the rest of my life. (a wish) If each of your brain cells were one person, there would be enough people to populate 25 planets. (an impossibility) The English Department requires that every student pass a proficiency test. (a necessity)

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Verbals A verbal is a word that is made from a verb, but it functions as a noun, an adjective, or an adverb. There are three types of verbals: gerunds, infinitives, and participles.

Gerunds A gerund ends in ing and is used as a noun.

Waking each morning is the first challenge. (subject) I start moving at about seven o’clock. (direct object) I work at jump-starting my weary system. (object of the preposition) As Woody Allen once said, “Eighty percent of life is showing up.” (predicate nominative)

Infinitives An infinitive is to and the base form of the verb. The infinitive may be used as a noun, an adjective, or an adverb.

to succeed is not easy. (noun) That is the most important thing to remember. (adjective) Students are wise to work hard. (adverb)

esl Note: It can be difficult to know whether a gerund or an infinitive should follow a verb. It’s helpful to become familiar with lists of specific verbs that can be followed by one but not the other. (See 676.2–677.1.)

Participles A present participle ends in ing and functions as an adjective. A past participle ends in ed (or another past tense form) and also functions as an adjective.

The studying students were annoyed by the partying ones. The students playing loud music were annoying. (These participles function as adjectives: studying students and partying students. Notice, however, that playing has a direct object: music. All three types of verbals may have direct objects. See 649.3.)

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using Verbals Make sure that you use verbals correctly; look carefully at the examples below.

Verbal: diving is a popular Olympic sport. (Diving is a gerund used as a subject.)

diving gracefully, the Olympian hoped to get high marks. (Diving is a participle modifying Olympian.)

Verb: The next competitor was diving in the practice pool. (Here, diving is a verb, not a verbal.)

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Common Irregular Verbs and their principal parts

Present Past Past Tense Tense Participle am, be was, were been arise arose arisen awake awoke, awoken, awaked awaked beat beat beaten become became become begin began begun bite bit bitten, bit blow blew blown break broke broken bring brought brought build built built burn burnt, burnt, burned burned burst burst burst buy bought bought catch caught caught choose chose chosen come came come cost cost cost cut cut cut dig dug dug dive dived, dove dived do did done draw drew drawn dream dreamed, dreamed, dreamt dreamt drink drank drunk drive drove driven eat ate eaten fall fell fallen feel felt felt fight fought fought find found found flee fled fled

Present Past Past Tense Tense Participle fly flew flown forget forgot forgotten, forgot freeze froze frozen get got gotten give gave given go went gone grow grew grown hang (execute) hanged hanged hang (suspend) hung hung have had had hear heard heard hide hid hidden hit hit hit keep kept kept know knew known lay laid laid lead led led leave left left lend lent lent let let let lie (deceive) lied lied lie (recline) lay lain make made made mean meant meant meet met met pay paid paid prove proved proved, proven put put put read read read ride rode ridden ring rang rung rise rose risen run ran run

Present Past Past Tense Tense Participle see saw seen set set set shake shook shaken shine (light) shone shone shine (polish) shined shined show showed shown shrink shrank shrunk sing sang sung sink sank sunk sit sat sat sleep slept slept speak spoke spoken spend spent spent spring sprang sprung stand stood stood steal stole stolen strike struck struck, stricken strive strove striven swear swore sworn swim swam swum swing swung swung take took taken teach taught taught tear tore torn tell told told think thought thought throw threw thrown wake woke, woken, waked waked wear wore worn weave wove woven wind wound wound wring wrung wrung write wrote written

Irregular Verbs Irregular verbs can often be confusing. That’s because the past tense and past participle of irregular verbs are formed by changing the word itself, not merely by adding d or ed. The following list contains the most troublesome irregular verbs.

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Ch 1: Critical Thinking Through Reading, Viewing, and Writing

Using the SQ3R Reading Strategy
Reading Actively
Responding to a Text
Summarizing a Text
Critical Thinking Through Viewing
Interpreting an Image
Evaluating an Image
Critical Thinking Through Writing
Practicing Modes of Thinking in Your Writing
Critical-Thinking and Writing Activities
Learning-Outcomes Checklist

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