Need to write self reflection about what I have wrote during the semester!
Nouf Alkhathamy
Dr. Black
Oct 30, 2017
The Child Yousef
There was a family including two brothers and two sisters, Naif, Nawaf, Nouf and Alhanouf. They were living quite life and happy. They did not think about having a new brother or sister. The siblings did not even ask their parents if they are going to have a new baby in the future. They thought they will be just four siblings forever. Even Naif the oldest brother could not remember his mom’s tummy when she was pregnant of his other siblings. Because the age difference between the four siblings is not much.
One day after almost nine years from the last family member. Mother and father decided to have a newborn baby. They were very glad when they knew that the pregnancy outcome analysis is positive. a lot of joy and happiness father said “We have to celebrate for this amazing news”. They prepared everything for the celebration as the cake, balloons, and drinks. Parents were waiting for their children from the schools to surprise them and tell them that they are about to have a new brother or sister.
The children came from the schools and the amazement was covering their faces when they saw their house. The balloons were everywhere , and there was a big beautiful cake. Half of it was blue and half of it was pink. The parents decided to choose that cake with those two colors, because they did not know the sex of the fetus. The children were surprising about what they saw.
“Daddy Mommy what is going on?” the children were asking.
“We have a beautiful news for you, we will tell you but just come closer.” Mother said. The siblings came closer to their mom with a lot of enthusiasm to know what is going on.
Look! Today we are celebrating because we are going to say welcome to a new baby in our family soon.
“What? What does that mean?
“That is mean your mom is pregnant and we are going to have a new baby, ” Father said.
“wow really! When the baby is going to come? Is he a boy or a girl? We are so happy to hear that. ” Naif said.
“Mmm we have to wait his or her for nine months.” Mother said.
My sister Alhanouf and I were young at that time. I was 11 years old and Alhanouf was 9 years old. We could not actually understand why they were celebrating, and they were busy eating cake, play with balloons, they enjoyed their time. Naif was almost 15 years old and Nawaf was 14, because of that Naif and Nawaf could understand what was happening and they were very happy and exited.
The days went and went by waiting the new baby with a lot of excitement and enthusiasm. Mother took care to be healthy, she took care of her health by drinking a lot of milk and eating fruits and vegetables everyday, for her and especially for the baby too. Sometimes she was asking my dad to buy weird things to eat or to drink. For example, one day mom and dad were sitting in the dining room and watching the T.V.
Suddenly mom said “I want to eat a watermelon right now, go and buy some for me.”
“But how can I find a watermelon in this winter season? ”
“I do not know this is not my problem just go and buy some quick.”
“How can I find where is it?”
With high tone and screaming “The baby wants it not me.”
“Ok I will see just calm down.” It was hard for him to find a watermelon but
Finally he could.
As we know the pregnant woman sometimes craves weird things, not just creepy things also she craves at the wrong time as what happened with my mom.
My dad was trying to make my mom feel comfortable as much as he can. He helped her by taking a good care of the children and sometimes he cooked for them. He did his best for her, because he knows how the pregnancy is difficult.
The pregnancy was difficult for my mom, because it happened after a long time when Alhanouf was born. She took various vitamins to compensate for the vitamins that the baby absorbed them. She gained a lot of weight in that pregnancy. She did not care about the shape of her body as much as she was careful about how she can feed the baby inside her very well.
One day while the family was sitting and talking together in the dinning room.
Father said “What do you think guys about the name of the baby? ”
“But we do not know if he is a boy or a girl, ” Naif said.
“Mmm if she was a girl I would like to name her Norah, ” Nouf said.
With tone of anger Nawaf said “No, I do not want a girl I want a boy and I will call him Abdullaziz”
“Oh that is a great name I liked it, ” Father said. Mother was looking to them and listening with a big smile on her face. She said “ Ok let us ensure that. ”
“Do what? ”
“Let us go to the doctor tomorrow and check the sex of the baby. ”
“Oh that will make it easy to choose the name of the baby, ” Father said. “Ok we agree. ”
The next day, the family went to the hospital to see the sex of the baby as they said. The whole family went to the preview of pregnancy room. Mom lay on the bed to allow the doctor checks the sex of the baby and his status. Children were looking to meditate to the screen that is about show them the baby.
The doctor put some gel on mom’s tummy. Then she started passing a small machine on her tummy. She said “look at your baby he is fine and everything is ok do not worry. ”
“Oh thank God, thank you doctor but actually we ready to know the sex of the baby. ” Mom said.
“Aha Now I understood why you brought all your family with you this time.”
“Yes, yesterday they were arguing about the sex of the baby, and I told them that going to see it together. ”
“Can you show us now please!” Nouf said.
“ Ok are excited to know? ”
“Yes. ”
“1,2,3 Here we go can you see him?”
“Oh my little baby he is so cute isn’t he?” Mom said
sadly Nouf was saying “Oh no is he a boy no no.”
Nawaf was happy, because the baby was a boy as he wanted. The other members were happy too. They did not care about its sex as much as they were caring about his health.
Mother was loving to put her hand on her tummy and read some verses of the Qur’an. She believed that the baby could hear the voices outside. She decided to allow him to hear the Qur’an instead of the music or something else.
Mom loves to read and hear the verses of the prophet Joseph “peace be upon him”. She was taking the radio and put it in the verses of the prophet Joseph. She loves his story and she thinks it has a lot of the inspiring, she feels a lot of comfort and tranquillity when she hears it or read it
She was thinking to name him Yousef as the name of the Prophet. We found it a very nice name and it has a beautiful meaning too. We named him Yousef and we were happy to choose that name.
Months went and the date of birth was close. Mom was sometimes felt the baby kick and some colic. Epically in the ninth month it happened a lot. It was painful an annoying at bedtime. She could not sleep well in recent months, her tummy was so big and it was uncomfortable to sleep.
On day at 12 midnight, mom had a very bad colic, she could not bear it. She wakes my dad up to pick her up at the hospital. “Mohammed wake up wake up I think the baby is coming.”
“Are you serious? ”
“It is not the time for joking, just take me to the hospital, it's very painful, ” with screaming and high tone mom said.
“Ok calm down, and hold my hand.”
My dad took my mom immediately to the hospital. She was screaming and kept saying “I am going to die I am going to die.” as we know the most kinds of pain is birth pain. Because of that we know why God said in Qur’an “The Paradise is under the feet of mothers.”
After many hours of waiting finally the baby came to life. At the first moment that Yousef was birth, mom forgot all the pain that she had.
On August 17, 2005, was the date he was born in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. Mother asked the nurse in a very terrified tone. “Is he okay? Is my baby fine? And why isn’t he crying? Is he dead?” She turned to my father with tears in her face and screamed. ” brings my child to me! I want to hug him, right now!” My dad did not know how to calm my mom down.
He was saying. “Everything will be ok. Just calm down, please.” He was actually nervous and depressed as well, but he was trying to not show my mom that.
The nurse immediately took Yousef away from my mom because she knew there was something wrong with him. Unfortunately Yousef was almost a dead body with no sign of life. So, he was being transferred to the Intensive Care and many doctors and nurses were surrounding him. In the other room though, my mom was still screaming and crying hysterically “give me my baby, give me my baby!” She had no idea what was going on.
At that moment, my siblings and I , came from our schools directly to the hospital to meet our new brother. We were very happy when my dad told us that he was born. We brought some flowers and some chocolate for my mom as well. We went to my mom’s room with smiling and happy faces. When we looked at my dad and my mom, we saw a lot of sadness on their faces so we asked. “Where is our brother, Yousef? Can we see him?” The answer was “ NO! ”
My dad took my brothers and I quietly to the visitor’s room and told us to sit down, “Look! I am going to tell you something about Yousef, but I want you to be strong and pray for him. I am so sorry to say that, but it is hard to see Yousef now because the doctors said so”.
Then, we said “why not? ”
My dad was trying to make it easy for us by saying “he is just a little bit sick, but when he gets well I promise I will let you visit him, ok!.” We agreed with a lot of frustration that we understood that we cannot see him easily.
My siblings and I went home with my dad, and mom still at the hospital. She kept asking the nurses “where is my baby I just have to feed him. Certainly he is hungry now.”
“Do not worry we fed him yet, ” nurse said.
“But I will go home with him right? ”
“I am sorry I cannot give you an answer now, but I hope that you go with your baby.”
“say what’s wrong with him?” with a tired voice mom said.
“I will give you a medicine now, it will help you to relax and sleep ok!”
The nurse gave my mom the medicine that helped her to sleep for many hours.
My dad went home with us, because he had to pick us up to school as everyday. He staid with us for a few days while mother at the hospital. He cooked, helped us in homework, and cleaned our clothes etc..
After a few days mom went home with a lot of sadness in her face, and the tears were covering her cheeks. She was so depressed and sad, because she went home without Yousef.
My dad was trying to relieve her pain, but also he was sad as much as my mom was. The next day the doctor called my dad to get to the hospital.
“Hello Mr. Mohammed, how are you?” Doctor said.
“Hello! Sorry I could not know who is calling? ”
“I am Yousef’s doctor, I want you to come to the hospital to tell you about your son’s issue.”
“Of course I am coming.” My dad went there immediately to hear what was going on with his son.
“Hi Mr. Mohammed would you sit down, please.”
“Would you explain what is my son’s issue? ”
“I will be very honest with you and I will tell you exactly what we figured out.”
“Ok! I am listening”
“ We did a lot of analyzes and tests to be sure, and what we figured out that
Yousef has a rare condition in the world.”
“Sorry! But, what does that mean? ”
“That is mean your son is one of 300 status just in the world, he is the first baby in Saudi Arabia has this illness, I am really sorry to say that.”
“Can you tell me in the language that I can understand? ”
“The breath control signals from your son brain does not work while he is sleeping, he needs to breathe by connecting a breathing machine into a whole in the center of his neck.”
“Do you mean he is going to be like that forever? ”
“I do not know what is going to happen in the future, but I am telling you about what is happening now.”
My dad felt the worst feeling at that moment. He could not even go home to tell my mom. He went to see Yousef and reassure him. He kept thinking how he is going to tell my mom about that.
As what the doctor said Yousef can not go out of the hospital and my siblings and I cannot visit him too. It is a very serious issue, he can not even take a nap without the breathing machine. He will die if he sleeps without it, because of that he needs someone to keeping an eye on him for 24 hours in case.
Our life is completely changed after Yousef was born. We lived with a lot of longing to see him, kiss him, or play with him. I could’t see him even from far away. There were strict instructions of seeing him. The doctors were scared of germs to go inside Yousef’s room. It was quite dangerous for his health. Because of that they prevent the visit for the kids.
My mom was visiting him every day, and she was filling the breast feeding of her milk to milk her baby. She never gave up on doing that, and it was really hard for a mother to sleep and wake up without her son. She was thinking and talking about him most of the time. Sometimes she suddenly wakes up and cry, and we knew the reason.
Our life became from a hospital to another hospital, just to find the better doctor to treat him. All of them said the same sentence “We are sorry, but there is no medical treatment for your son found until now.”
We as a family just want to go home and live together, but we could’t because he needs a nurse with him for 24 hours and machines. Father could’t achieve that, because the machines and the nurse was super expensive for him. My parents kept seeing Yousef at the hospital for almost two years.
My siblings and I were waiting the day that we could see him and play with our young brother.
“Mom takes pictures of Yousef when you visit him ok!” I said.
“Ok do not worry I will take a picture of him.”
We as siblings just saw him in the pictures. It was hard but we were strong enough too and we could live with it.
Here is one of the pictures that my mom took it to let my siblings and I to see him. Here when he was almost one year. He spent most of the time on this white bed, and he has a lot of pictures at the same status. White bed, boring, frees from the kinds of joy and colors. As you see how much is the breathing machine loves him. It does not want to leaves his neck.
My parents were worried about their child’s life. They did not know what to do or where to go. They were looking for many hospitals inside Saudi Arabia but there was no results for his issue.
My father decided to go out of the country to see if they can treat his son. He asked the prince Sultan Bin Abdulaziz for material assistance. Because, as we know it was difficult for dad to pay all the treatment expenses.
The prince Sultan accepted father’s order to treat Yousef outside the country. Father decided to go to Germany because, he heard there are a very good doctors.
In 2006 the whole family went to Germany, and we went directly from the airport to the Children’s Hospital by an ambulance. There was two nurses and a lot of medical equipment for Yousef’s safety.
The family arrived to the hospital and the doctors were waiting him. While my dad was completing the entry procedures, they took Yousef to his room to check his health.
None of us speak Germany, but there was a translator for help. The doctor said “You can go to the hotel for rest and come back to talk about the Yousef’s treatment plan.”
“Ok thank you.”
We were so tired of the long trip, we ate some food and deeply slept. In the morning we went to the hospital to see Yousef and talk about what is going to happen.
“Good mooring Mr. Mohammed,” doctor said.
“Good morning doctor how is Yousef?”
“He is fine do not worry, but we need to talk about what we are going to do in the duration treatment.”
“Ok.”
“First we are going to do some medical analysis to make sure about his illness.”
“But he already did them in Saudi Arabia!”
“I know but we have to do it again, to see if there is appropriate treatment for his condition.”
“OK Dr. how long the treatment going to be ?”
“I am not sure but I think it is going to be from four to five months.”
They did the medical analysis for Yousef but unfortunately the results were negative. They said the same things that other hospitals said. “Your son’s issue does not have a treatment to get rid of his illness.”
My family and I were so depressed and sad to hear that. We staid there for four months with no results. My siblings and I left the school at that time because we wanted to go with our brother. We were meditating in finding the appropriate treatment.
We went back home with a lot of frustration. Mom and dad never gave up and they kept looking for a hospital has the treatment. The family is changed and we are not as before. We could’t set and eat together or celebrate for anything. Parents most of the time were at the hospital.
Mom was most of the time with him and sometime she was sleeping with him too. We as children missed our parents but we could’t do anything as well. We grew up with that struggle of longing to our brother.
One day when Yousef was one and a half years old, my cousin Ibrahim who works in media channel called (MBC) and it is very popular channel in the Middle East. He asked my dad if he can talk about Yousef's issue in his program.
“This is a good idea but let me talk with my wife about it and I will let you know.”
“Ok I am waiting and I think it is going to be a turning point for Yousef and the family.”
My dad talked with mom about it and she said “Let us try. maybe it is going to be a turning point for Yousef as Ibrahim said.”
My dad told Ibrahim “Ok we accepted your idea, but do you think people going to show a positive feedback?”
“I am not sure but I wish that.”
After one week Ibrahim and the crew were preparing for the show. They made an influential report about Yousef and his illness. It included some of his pictures and videos showing his status.
They decided to visit Yousef at the hospital to let the people see hem live. Also they did an interview with my dad, doctor, and with my siblings and I as well. They asked au a few questions about him and how is our life changed after Yousef coming.
The next day of the show Ibrahim called my dad to tell him the feedback of the interview.
“Hi Mohammed, I have a good news for you.”
“What happened!”
“We received much sympathy from people about Yousef’s story.”
“Really! thank you that is awesome.”
“Yes it is, but guess what is the biggest news?”
“What?”
“We received a royal order from prince Sultan Bin Abdulaziz that he is going to take care of everything for Yousef as the nurses, the machines and his treatment for a lifetime.”
My dad could not believe what he just heard. Immediately he worshiped to God and thanked him for that. At that moment mom could’t control her tears and she cried from the happiness.
Finally after one year and a half of the longing and anguish, Yousef could live with us as a family. I cannot tell you how we were happy. Yousef came home with a nurse, his machines and medical tools.
The hospital prepared a special room for him at home, it has everything he needs as the hospital’s room. But this time with joy warmth and colors. Loyal and loving to the one who gathered us, My parents put the prince Sultan’s pictures in several places in the house.
Our life became so different after Yousef coming home. Finally we could eat, set, and talk together as before. My siblings and I could play and see our brother anytime we want, it is not difficult anymore.
When everything went very well, mom and dad decided to give Yousef a brother. They thought it is going to be good for him if he has a brother close to his age. He will protect Yousef, help him, and play with him.
Actually it happened, and we were very happy to hear that my mom is pregnant again. We were excited for the new baby, it does not matter for us if it is a boy or a girl, but actually my mom strongly wanted a boy.
In 2007 the new baby was born, and God accepted my mom invitations, yes it was a boy. She was very happy when she knew that he is boy. “He is going to be a good friend and brother for Yousef” She said.
Even at that moment she was thinking about Yousef and how she can help him for the future.
Fortunately this time mom went home with the baby, and his health is very well. The family were sitting and started the conversation.
“What is his name?” Alhanouf said.
“We did not name him yet” mom said.
Suddenly dad said “What if we name him Ibrahim as my cousin? he helped us and I think it is a beautiful name. isn’t it?”
“That will be awesome, ok we will name him Ibrahim.”
The whole family agreed with Ibrahim name, the family became bigger and happy with the new member. Yousef grew up well in the midst of his family, and the time to go to school started. He entered the sixth year and he has to go to school. He could not enter a normal school as other children, because they rejected him when they knew that he is sick and it is a responsibility for them as they said.
My dad registered him in a privet school and special bus as well. There was a nurses with him 24 hours anywhere he goes . Actually it was not comfortable for him and the family, but we had to live with that just for Yousef.
Mom was trying to give him the tenderness and care as much as she could. She was not feeling good when the nurses be with him while he is sleeping. Mom was letting them to go outside the room to sleep with her child.
Can you imagine that you sleep with annoying sound that came from the breathing machines? It is really hard and you can not sleep comfortably. I tried it one time but I could’t sleep that day. Mom sleeps with Yousef since he came home and never let him sleeps alone.
In 2013 father decided to go outside the country again to find a better treatment and education for his son. He chose to go to the U.S. exactly to Chicago state. The whole family went to Chicago, we staid there for four months. Then we went to another hospital in Cincinnati state we thought that maybe we will find the treatment but no results again.
Yousef spent his years in the hospitals, from an appointment to another and hospital to hospital. My dad was very exhausted and my mom also. But because they love him the most they forget the tiredness. He is a very nice boy kind and friendly, quite most of the time and doesn’t make noise as other children. I think he is the boy that you will love him immediately if you met him.
Currently in 2017 Yousef and my family are in Virginia for medical treatment, studying and working. They are in the U.S. since 2013. My siblings and I belonged to the universities. Yousef and Ibrahim belonged to the elementary school. Father started working at Saudi Embassy and mother is a house wife. We live stable life and successful.
Even though we as a family went through a very tough moments, but we were strong enough to pass them. We never gave up, and will never give up of looking for the medical treatment for him.
My family and I never made him feel as a sick or different child. Quite the contrary we tried our best to do not show him that. If you look at him you will think that he is a normal person. He speaks, eats, moves and does the things that other children do.
Finally, I would say there is always a hope to see Yousef sleeps without breathing machines. We pray for him everyday in the hope of full recovery. We believe in God and we believe that when he gives disease he gives medications too.
Science evolves and one day medical scientists will find the cure for him. Doctors in Philadelphia told us that when he become 13 years old they will do a surgery to close the hole that in his neck and make a mask for him. He can wear it when he sleeps, and it is better and easer for him.
It is tough and difficult but we are strong enough. Yousef made us closer and stronger, he taught us what does the hope mean and, we learned the patience and endurance in all cases.
Here is Yousef 10 years old with a big smile full of the happiness and thankful for parents, siblings and everyone supported him. Wishing to have a better life in the future with full recovery.