Learn about Negotiation

Part 1: Lesson1-3 Negotiation Basics Part 2: Lesson 4-6 Negotiation Strategy Part 3: Lesson 7-10 Advanced Negotiation Techniques

Lesson 1: How negotiation works So how does a negotiation actually work? Well, I like to think of it in terms of two phase, the phase before the job offer, and phase after the initial job offer. Side note, if you're looking to negotiate a raise in your current role, then think about the phases as before the raise conversation and after. Later, we'll go into detail about how to deal with each step along the way, but for now, let's just look at the big picture of what happens before and after there's an offer on the table. A lot of people are surprised to learn that negotiation begins way before you ever get an offer. The negotiation actually begins from the very second you get any kind of salary expectations question. What salary do you want? What are you currently making? And all the variations on the two. This is why it's so important to research your worth and figure out your ideal salary range well in advance.

This way, you'll be ready to deal with salary questions in a way that helps you get what you want. And later, we'll talk about the specifics on how to do this. Also important, before the offer, start thinking about what else you can negotiate. A lot of people miss out on the opportunity to sweeten the overall package because they focus on salary alone. So we'll talk about expanding the pie and how to get the employer to add more value to your compensation package.

During the interview phase, you can also learn a lot about who you'll be negotiating with. We'll teach you how to analyze a person's communication style so that you can approach them in the most persuasive way when it's negotiation time. Now, to be clear, during this before the offer phase, your number one priority is to actually get an offer, but you can do a little groundwork so that you're ready once the offer is on the table.

So what happens after the offer? Well, first, there's your initial response showing the right amount of enthusiasm and appreciation for the offer. So you can actually position yourself well to counter. So when you get the offer, you don't want to be like, "Oh." That wouldn't be great, but then again, you also don't want to be like, "Oh my God, this is amazing. Thank you so much. I can't believe this.Wow. So much. Whoa."

You do want to try to find a balance there so that you're giving the right impression of enthusiasm, but not leaning in one direction or the other, not too enthusiastic or too sullen about the offer itself. Then there's structuring your counteroffer and we'll talk about how to explain your position and make a case for what you want. Next, you'll get a response to your counteroffer. We'll talk about how to deal with that resistance that you might get.

We'll also talk about how to suggest ideas to sweeten the whole compensation package.

If you happen to have other job offers, we'll talk about how to strategically incorporate those as well. And we'll talk about all the sneaky techniques that people use against you. These HR folks, recruiters, hiring managers, generally have a lot of experience negotiating with candidates. So they obviously have a little bit of an advantage over you. There are a lot of little techniques and tricks they can use on you and half the battle is just being aware of them so you can spot them.

Next, we'll talk about how to weigh the pros and cons of the offer and when to compromise. Also deciding when you should walk away and how to do it gracefully so you don't burn any bridges. Then once you've gotten what you want, your goal is to end a negotiation on a positive note where they feel more excited about hiring you now than when they initially gave you the offer, that's the ultimate outcome there. Before we delve into how to, let's talk about why to negotiate at all.

A lot of people think, "Well, yes, I should definitely negotiate," but then they get the offer and they basically freeze up and accept what's given to them. Why? Well, often it's a great relief to get an offer especially if you've been looking for a while. People feel they should play it safe and be grateful for what they have especially if the offer is pretty good. They don't feel like they want to tempt faith, to risk of losing the offer or annoying the employer.

If this has happened to you in the past, don't beat yourself up about it. It's a normal human reaction. Most people are generally uncomfortable negotiating for money and it does vary, of course, depending on family influences, your culture, the country you're from, cultural norms, and a lot of different factors. And for many, it's just an awkward subject with a lot of baggage. This is particularly true when the stakes are high and you really want the job.

But here's the thing, you only need to improve a little bit to see big benefits. You don't need to be some master negotiator, just being a little bit better at negotiation can translate into hundreds of thousands of dollars in extra income over the course of your career, maybe even more. So it's definitely worth spending your time to learn, to practice, to get good at it. There's a huge upside and no downside. Since negotiation is a skill, it's teachable, it's learnable, and it's in your control.

It's something you can get much better at very, very quickly. As with any skill, the more time you spend preparing and practicing, the better you're going to do. If you're a tennis player, or a chess player, or a poker player, the more you spend preparing and practicing, the better you're going to do. And it's honestly the best possible investment you can make because the ROI, the return on investment, is thousands and thousands of dollars for every hour you spend on this.

There's an old saying, "You deserve what you negotiate." So if you follow these steps, you're much more likely to get paid what you deserve. So what's negotiable? The short

answer is, in most cases, almost anything. Everything's negotiable. So in addition to salary, you have benefits and stock options, vesting periods, start dates, moving expenses, number of days per week, the ability to work from home.

You name it. It could be vacation time, maternity leave, paternity leave. You can negotiate even continuing education. It can be all kinds of things. Transportation allowances, company vehicle, even reviews cycles. How often you get reviewed, how often your salary gets adjusted. So there's plenty of things that you can negotiate that are on the table.

Most important is that you're aware you have options. They won't necessarily be presented to you and it's up to you to identify what would be important to you and be prepared to raise these options when the time comes. There's also a strategic component to asking for more than you expect which we'll go into in more detail. Remember, there's no rule book for life, and the harsh reality is you only deserve what you negotiate.

There are two big rules for negotiation, two things you want to avoid. Rule one, you want to avoid what's called single issue negotiation meaning you want to present your wish list for your job offer, all at once, as one package, as opposed to negotiating each item alone. For example, if you have an extending back and forth on salary, you fought hard and they finally relent and give you what you want, well, you don't want to suddenly whip out some completely new request that they're unaware of.

And like, "Oh, by the way, I want a company car and moving expenses covered and all these other things." You have a much better chance at getting a great package by presenting your wish list all at once at the start of the negotiation. Rule two, you want to avoid what's called sequence negotiation, where you want to negotiate multiple things but your counterpart doesn't and wants to only discuss one specific point at a time and won't move on to another topic until you've resolved that one point.

So for example, if HR says, "Well, I need to resolve the salary number before moving on and discussing benefits," well, then that in of itself becomes a negotiation. So you might respond with, "Hey, not a problem. I'm happy to finish up with salary in just a moment." But since I know there's a lot more to working here than salary alone, it would be very helpful to get a sense of some of the other benefits. Would it be appropriate to talk about some of those as well?

Now, I'm using the word benefits here, kind of, as a catch-all term. You may be using something else more specific like stock options or moving expenses, etcetera. In negotiation theory, there are two ways to think about a negotiation. The first approach is called a distributive negotiation, and the second approach is called a collaborative negotiation. We're going to dig into each of these a little bit because there's an appropriate place for each of them.

Within distributive approach, the idea philosophically is that it's a competition. It's a competition over who's going to get the most of a limited resource. So for example, if you're negotiating salary and the employer wants to give you $60,000 and you want $80,000, and that's the only consideration, then it would be a distributive negotiation. It tends to make the whole thing a contest where there's a winner and a loser. There are times to use this kind of approach, but not generally what a job offer where there's usually more to consider than salary alone.

A lot of people make the mistake of doing a distributive approach from the get-go and they limit themselves by only relying on this approach. Number two is the collaborative approach which is meant to accomplish what you would expect. The collaborative approach, aka the cliché win-win approach, assumes that the whole compensation package is expandable. The idea is that there are more benefits and goodies that can be added to the compensation package through discussion, through communication, and that's what you want to focus on in your negotiation, the collaborative approach.

Now, some people might try to immediately pull you into a distributive negotiation, which you should try to resist. And I'll talk about some techniques to keep your counterpart focused on that collaborative approach. A great way to think about these two approaches is with the idea of a pie, where a distributive approach, each person gets a limited amount of delicious, delicious pie. You get a little slice, they get a big slice or vice versa. The collaborative approach is about expanding the pie, making the pie bigger so it's not just about who gets a little slice and who doesn't, but it's about making the pie bigger and bigger so everyone gets their fill.

So that's a little overview on how a negotiation works and why it's so important to learn to get better at it.

Lesson 2: Negotiation Stage

In negotiation, there are six stages I want you to think about. Stage one, fact-finding. Doing your research, asking questions, doing your reconnaissance. Stage two, is all about getting clear on what the goals are. Communicating what you want and the employer communicating what they want. Which bring us to stage three, learning the real outcome of your counterpart. The motivations behind their position, behind their offer can vary tremendously depending on the person and their role in the organization. So, for example, the hiring manager might want the best person for the job and that's their true motivation, and other factors might be less important. But if you're dealing with HR, they have a completely different outcome, they don't necessarily care about the hiring manager's goals. So, stage three is learning about the outcome of the person you're dealing with, their goals. Stage four is about finding creative options, to meet each party's goals.

This ties into understanding the motivations of the other person and using the collaborative approach that we touched on earlier. So, the question becomes, how do you expand that pie to give each other what you want? Stage five is about assessing and bargaining. You are now using persuasion techniques to make your case for whatever compensation package you're looking for. And you'll need some creativity and you'll need an understanding of the other person's communication style which we'll touch on in more detail later.

And the last stage is stage six, and it's about reaching an agreement and coming to terms on a final offer. So, that's a little overview of the stages. And let's start learning in more detail about each one. The first stage in negotiations is fact-finding, the research stage. So, what you're going to do is get absolute clarity on your goals and issues. And then of course, you want to research and make a best guess about the goals of the other party.

Another thing you're going to do is determine your BATNA, what does BATNA stand for? Well, it's a classic part of negotiation theory. BATNA is an acronym, B-A-T-N-A it stands for Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement. And it's sort like a Plan B, if a deal falls through. What's your best alternative? And generally, you don't want to accept a job offer that's worse than your BATNA.

And whoever has the best BATNA has the most leverage. And we'll cover that in more detail shortly. So, continuing on this research stage, you're trying to determine what resistance you might face and where. So, depending on the kind of person and organization you're dealing with, you're going to try to figure out where you might get some pushback. Is it salary the alone or the their other items you might face resistance on like benefits, or a company car, or moving expenses, whatever they might be.

The trust level between you and the other party is also critical. You probably don't have a history with each other and that's a consideration. If you've already had an interview with the hiring manager and you're now also negotiating with the same person, you may have more trust there since already know you. Sometimes you don't have much control over this, but if they already have good feelings about you then that will carry over into the negotiation.

So, this is stage one, fact-finding, meant to you give you a starting point for the negotiation. But obviously things will change as you dive in and start dealing with people. But the more you prep, the better your negotiation will go. The second stage is introducing the goals, your goals and their goals. So, for example, they may present you an offer for 60,000 a year, let's say that that's their goal, not counting anything else.

You might mention, well, based on your research, the range you've seen for this kind of role is actually between $60,000 and $80,000. And that based on your experience, you feel that you're closer to the higher end of that range. So, the salary you were looking for

is closer to $80,000. Great. So, now you've both introduced your goals and we've done another thing in terms of anchoring which we'll touch on that concept a little later.

But they've said 60, you've said 80, now, we have some initial idea of what each person wants. So, on to stage three. The third stage is all about learning about your counterpart's true goals and motivations. So, really digging in psychologically to figure out what's behind their goal? The more you know, the better you'll do. So, the first thing you want to ask yourself is, do you know anything about this person? Do you know anything about what's important to them?

Another factor to consider, organizational culture. What's precedent for your kind of request? Is it at a huge company or startup? Is it a buttoned up Fortune 500 company or a free-wheeling, you know, startup. These companies are more likely pay more but they're also more likely be constrained on salary ranges and bureaucracy. Even more important is the person's role in the organization and their authority level.

What can they do, what can they not do based on your experienced, on your research, on your assessment of the situation. The CEO can probably say yes on the spot. But the HR person may have to check in and buy-in from others. If your counterpart needs buy-in or approval from someone else, keep that in mind, they need to feel it's worth their while to stick their neck out for you. Another important factor is preferred communication style which we'll cover in a lot of detail later.

What is their preferred communication style? What tendencies do they have in terms of how they want to be influenced? How do they want to be dealt with? Because everybody has a preferred way of being sold to which is really, really important to understand. Everyone just assumes that their own preferred communication style is the same one others will respond best to. Not the case.

You're going to be quite surprised when we'll talk about this later. Other "big factors" are personal likes and dislikes, what's importance to them personally in life. You need to win anegotiation without coming across as annoying or off-putting. And then, how will the role they're hiring for impact their current job or project? What impact if any will this decision have on them personally? How much value can you bring to their life?

Obviously, for the hiring manager it has the most impact because, you know, hiring the best person will have the biggest effect on their day-to-day life. But for someone in HR, maybe there is no impact and they're indifferent whether you take the job or not. Stage four is all about finding creative options. And there are two approaches you can use. One way is to propose one specific creative idea at a time and you might use this if you truly understand the specific outcomes from making the hire.

And also have a sense of the preferred communication style of the other person. The alternate approach is to offer multiple ideas at once and to see what sticks. You can use

this to pin down the ideas they like, clarify their priorities, and have an opportunity to reframe their priorities. So, instead of negotiating salary alone as one item, if you're offering up a while package of six different options, you'll quickly get a sense of where your counterpart might have flexibility.

More on exactly how to put a counterproposal in a bit. Stage five is about assessing and bargaining. So, now you're dealing with an actual solid offer and you're in the thick of it. You're assessing your options, you're reviewing specifics, and determining what else you need to reach in agreement. You'll want to present your final offer in terms of how the employer achieves their outcomes in addition to your own.

Again, you're looking for that collaborative win-win approach. And then there's the last stage, stage six, which is reaching an agreement. Is the agreement fair and reasonable to both parties? Pretty important, right? And you obviously want to get everything in writing. Important thing to remember. You're starting a job here, not negotiating the price of a car with someone you'll never see again.

It's not to one-off negotiation where you don't really care about what happens after the fact. You're setting the tone for your time at this job and you want them to like you. This is a especially true if you're negotiating directly with the hiring manager. You want them to walk away thinking, "Oh, wow, this person is really confident, they know what they're talking about, and they're ambitious, and they were a tough negotiator."

The idea is that they're more excited about working with you than they were before. So, those are the stages of a negotiation.

Lesson 3: Influences on the negotiation

So now, we're going to cover the different influences on the negotiation process. And there are about seven main ones to consider and we'll go through each. It's good to be aware of these influences and keep them in mind as the negotiation proceeds. When you feel you're getting pushback or a negative response, you can identify where it may be coming from and adapt accordingly. First, strategy and tactics. Your strategy is your planned approach for achieving your goal. Each side has a goal and each side will have a strategic approach to get what they want. The lack of a strategy is a strategy in of itself and usually, not a pretty good one. Strategy includes the tone you take, collaborative versus competitive, the points that you emphasize, the points that you want to deflect, who you want involved in the conversation and how, etc. Your tactics are how you go about achieving your strategy. What do you say? How do you say it? So, for example, a negotiation can easily go wrong because of a misguided strategy or tactic.

Maybe you came on too strong or too quickly or you put too much emphasis on the wrong bargaining point. Second, negotiation skills. This is why you're here. You want to

make sure your skills are strong enough to get what you want. How well do you communicate? How well do you ask questions? So you can get info about what's important to the other party.

So it's about your knowledge of psychology and your actual negotiating skill set. Planning is number three. The research, the prep you're doing to analyze the other party to understand their limits, to understand creative options that you have at your disposal. Number four is legal factors. There could be legal considerations. Sometimes you have some creative ideas that you want to run by or want to include but they're not permitted for a variety of reasons.

There could be a code of conduct, industry standards, regulations, labor laws or other legal factors that influence how and what you can negotiate. Next, cultural factors. This can be subtle but culture can definitely have an impact. The culture of an organization, the cultural background of the individual, where you grew up, how you grew up, what values are, so on and so forth. Cultural influences what communication style people are most comfortable with, how easily they trust others, what they see as overly pushy or obnoxious.

Six is organizational factors. What's going on at the company? Are they growing quickly and desperate to fill open positions? Are they looking to shake things up with someone with new ideas or are they worried about making another bad hire and looking to play it safe? Do they have a reputation for being super buttoned up and conservative and set in their ways or are they startups that are innovative and laidback?

That's important. What kind of person typically does well in the organization? Do they look for alphas or are they more about teamwork? What do you know about their ethics? Are they a company that's known for past shady practices or is it a company that's changing the world and you feel really good about? All these factors influence the person on the other side of the negotiation. How much are they willing to compromise?

And how they will respond to specific tactics you use? Organizational factors will influence things on you as well because you may even be willing to take a pay cut to work for a great organization but not compromise on salary for a less reputable company. Finally, the economy. What's happening in the market? What is the level of supply and demand for this job? Is the economy doing well or was there just another financial collapse?

These things have a big impact on that negotiation. And then there's supply and demand, meaning, if the employer is hiring for a quasi-commoditized job and there are a million people out there who can do it, obviously, that affects how strongly you can negotiate. If you have a very particular set of skills, like Liam Neeson in the movie <i>Taken</i>, then maybe there aren't enough people who can do that job well and then you can demand a higher salary for the role.

So that's a little bit about all the different factors that can influence a negotiation.

Lesson 4: Sources of resistance

So let's talk about sources of resistance during a negotiation. Let's say you're dealing with someone and now you're getting some pushback on different things you've asked for in your counteroffer. You want A, B, C, D, E, F, G. They're saying, "No, no, no," or giving some other resistance. It's really important that you're prepared for this in advance, and that you recognize what kind of resistance you're getting because just like ice cream, there are many different kinds of flavors of resistance. The employer might say no to something that you really want, but if you don't really understand the underlying reason for the "no," then you can't really counter their point well. So, here are seven flavors of resistance you might deal with, and half the battle is just being aware of them. Number one is logic. The other person could say something to the effect of, "Oh, the salary you're asking for is just too high for this role based on our research and data."

Number two is emotion. Someone might say something like, "Oh, the salary you're asking for is far too high." I'm not a fan of people who are money-hungry. Or they might say like, "Yeah, your salary, that's too high. I really like people who see the big picture here, and really value our mission." They'll throw out words that are not necessarily rooted in logic, but point to some other emotional undertone to what they're saying.

Number three is resistance to change. They'll say that you're asking for something that's never been done before, like, "Oh, Bob, I'd like to offer you this, but we've never done anything like that before. I'm not sure we'd want to set a precedent here." So there's nothing inherently wrong with the idea that you're proposing, it's just different and scary. So change could be a source of resistance as well.

Number four is limits testing, meaning you're getting hesitation around how far the other person is willing to push to get you to come on board. How much are they're willing or able to fight internally to get you what you need? So you might ask yourself, "How much authority do they really have to offer me the concessions I want?" So maybe the hiring manager has the authority to push the limits for you to get you the salary that you want, or maybe they have to seek higher approval and would have to make a case for why you deserve more.

If you're dealing with HR, they probably have a preset range they can go up to, they can't really go any higher than that, or they may not have the authority to talk about nontraditional benefits like performance incentives or stock options. Even if they do, they have the political risk of going back to the decision makers when they were hoping to be done and move along to the next hire. Number five is organizational constraints. Is there a defined cap on the salary range for this position?

Is there a firm policy against what you're asking for? Sometimes organizational constraints are real and have to be adapted to, but it's important to note sometimes people will use them as a tactic against you, what's called being "deferred to a higher authority" tactic, most classically used in the used car world. So, if you're going to buy a car from a dealer, and you're haggling with them, haggling with the salesperson, and they try talking you down on price, what they'll do is they'll use the "higher authority" tactic and say," I've got to go talk to my manager."

Then they'll go off, talk to their manager, and come back in a few minutes and say, "Well, Bob, I'm sorry. The manager says I can't do that." So it's a tactic that people use on you to put a wall between you and the actual decision maker, because it's very challenging to negotiate indirectly, and they know that. It's the exact reason many companies have HR do the salary negotiation, and not the hiring manager.

But if they want you bad enough, they may be willing to drop the posture and make an exception. Number six relates to personal rules that can throw you for a loop. They may say something like, "Well, I never agree to a deal the same day," or, "You seem to have all the qualifications, but I like candidates that have eight years of experience." This could be some random personal rule that they follow just on an unconscious basis.

It's important to note that these kinds of things could come up. A person has a rule or preference in their mind not necessarily tied to the organization or reality for that matter. For example, they might say, "I would never pay more than X for this role," and that could be based on what they're paying other people on the team or some outdated perceptions of the market. The main problem here is that you probably won't have a way of determining what their weird personal rule might be, which might very well be an unconscious bias, or even illegal.

Ideally, the people you're negotiating with are trained not to let their personal biases influence the decision making. But people are people, and you know we're all subject to biases, we're all subject to illogical beliefs that can affect the negotiation. And finally, number seven. Different behavior and communication styles. You and the other person may not gel, or have different styles.

Code words can be culture-fit, or, "They're just not my kind of person." So if the candidate's very buttoned-up and corporate, and your counterpart isn't, they're wearing a t-shirt at the start-up, and they're very laid back, this can cause friction, or one is a super-fast talker and the other one talks very slowly like a turtle, that can also be an issue. In a later lesson, we'll talk about how to determine the communication style of the other person and be able to adapt to it.

So, to summarize, it's really important that you're aware of these seven different sources of resistance, and they don't catch you by surprise.

Lesson 5: Planning your negotiation

Now we're going to talk about planning your negotiation, and the very first step you want to consider is figuring out what your BATNA is, which stands for "Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement." In essence, you have a plan B, what's your best alternative if things fall through? Why is creating a BATNA important? Well, number one to assess your leverage. It helps you actually increase your strength meaning that if you know what your plan B is and your plan C and your plan D, you know how far to push. You'll know what you're going to settle for and what you won't. So it helps increase your power in the negotiation by giving you some additional viable alternatives. The BATNA also gives you some real clarity on your settlement range for the salary and compensation package. It can also help you select the appropriate negotiation strategy, meaning the best approach of how and what to say.

And so if you're really thoughtful about creating your BATNA, it will help you in a lot of different ways. When considering your BATNA, here are a few suggestions. Number one, make a list of actions or next steps of what you'll do if the job offer does not meet your needs. For example, staying in your current role, considering other job offers you might have, waiting it out for a better opportunity, or maybe whatever freelance consulting you can do in lieu of taking the job.

It could be going back to school, it could be a list of family or friends who can help out while you're still looking. It could be temp jobs that you can research, etc. At this moment, you're not judging the merits of any of these ideas. We're just doing a brain dump on paper to see what's in front of us. Number two, you'll investigate what's involved in making these ideas a reality. Again, just so you have some options on the table. And number three, now, compare the job offer you've negotiated with your BATNA and make a thoughtful decision.

If your BATNA is just as attractive as the offer or more so, then you don't have a lot to lose. If your BATNA is bleak, you may have to choose a more cautious and thoughtful approach but it doesn't mean you can't negotiate. Now that we have a BATNA, let's talk about the planning process for your negotiation. Number one is goals and outcomes. You need to get the best possible understanding of each of the party's goals.

Yours, theirs, the hiring manager's, the recruiters, the HR person, whoever you're dealing with, meaning you want X and they want Y, what obstacles are you going to brush up against? There's only so much you can know about a negotiator's private agenda, but if you listen to clues, you can get some ideas about their hot-button issues and where someone could be persuaded.

Number two, issues. You want to get clarity on the issues themselves, the concerns, the interests. How many issues are there? Salary is of course one of them, but there could be

10 others that you want clarity on. Is this a single issue negotiation or multiple issues? What's your checklist of things you want clarified? For many candidates, it's about the salary and the bonus or commissions and whatever incentives there might be, but what if your main goal is to get a foot in the door at a particular company or what if a paid relocation to a more desirable city is far more valuable than a small pay bump?

Think it through in advance so you don't get caught off guard or get swept up in the other party's agenda. Number three is limits. You have to define your limits. In other words, determining your settlement range. Your aspiration might be $80,000 but based on your research, you think they might offer something closer to $60,000. Well, how low is too low to seriously consider? What's the minimum number that you would accept without a second of hesitation?

So what is your range? What do you think their range is? We'll get into the settlement range strategy in just a bit. Number four, what are the priorities? This is tied to the list of issues we defined earlier. What's negotiable, what's not negotiable? Figure out the order of importance to you so that you know what you're willing to sacrifice and what can be a deal-breaker.

Is it salary? How much? Maybe salaries are top consideration, but you'd bend a little if they'd offer you something related to a second priority that's important to you. You want to rank your issues in the order of importance. You'll want to get creative about what intangibles you can use. Number five is strategy. Before walking into the negotiation or picking up the phone, you'll want to get absolute clarity on your strategy.

How will you approach this negotiation? At this point, you have far more leverage than you did back during the interview process. They want to hire you, you want to be hired, everyone has invested time and energy into this process. At the same time, you can still mess up if you're not careful. That's why you spent time defining your goal and your priorities. This will help you come up with creative ideas for yourself and for them.

You may be able to suggest great ideas they hadn't even thought about. So what do you go in asking for? What information do you use to support your position? If they offer $65,000 and say you want $85,000, what data do you have to support your request? How will you respond to anticipated objections or a hard no? So to recap, great planning is all about understanding goals, understanding issues, understanding limits, and priorities, and having clarity on your strategy, settlement range.

I mentioned the term settlement range before. Now, let's explain it. Here are three important concepts we'll use: goal, above the goal, and below the goal. So your goal is the sweet spot of what you ideally want to make. Above the goal is your negotiation starting point, and below the goal is the minimum you'll accept before walking away. So for example, if we're only talking about salary, your goal could be $70,000.

Your above the goal could be $80,000 and your below the goal $60,000. So above the goal is the basis of the opening offer or your counteroffer, meaning that's the maximum number you can make a credible and supportable case for. What do I mean by credible and supportable? So let's say based on your research, you know the salary range is between $50,000 and $80,000, and that based on your research, they're probably going to offer you $60-ish.

Well, if you ask for a million bucks a year for that job, that's never going to happen for a job that never pays more than $80,000. So there's no way to justify it. You have no argument there for why you should get that number. So strategically, you'll want to open with your maximum supportable offer. This opening tends to be a little exaggerated, but by being so, you're actually giving yourself a little bit more flexibility for movement.

You'll want to open your position at $80,000 if you're hoping to end up at $70,000. If you open up at $72 and expect $70, you're going to be disappointed because you're probably going to get knocked down below your "goal number," but if you open at $80,000 and expect $70,000, you have much more wiggle room to get a number that's at or better than what you wanted.

The settlement range also helps establish expectations, also known as anchors, and makes working with concessions and counteroffers a lot easier. You're using this as a bargaining chip and establishing a foundation. With you asking for $80,000, they know that you're not going to accept $50 or $55. So it anchors them to an expectation about what you're looking for and it gets them psychologically to come up much closer to the numbers that you offered.

A couple final points to consider. You want to prepare this settlement range well before the negotiation begins. You don't want to try to figure it out on the fly. If you make a concession from your wish list, then get something for it. There has to be some logic to a concession you're making. Also, you don't need to make a big jump from your above the goal number to your goal number. Do it incrementally, don't jump down from $80,000 to $70,000 directly.

Go from $80, to $76, and then progressively smaller increments as you progress in the negotiation. You can also horse trade a little bit in these talks with them. You might say, "Well, I'd be willing to go down from $80,000 to $76,000, but only if we can accelerate the review cycle from 12 months to 6 months, and if I do a stellar job within these 6 months, I'd like to revisit the salary discussion. So those are a few ideas about the negotiation planning process.

If you take the time to do it well, you're going to give yourself many more options to play with and put yourself in a great position.

Lesson 6: Researching your worth

Let's talk a little about researching your worth. So, do you know your true market value? A lot of people don't. Some people underestimate themselves or the people overestimate themselves. But few people have a true sense of their market value. If you do have an idea, what are you basing it on? Was your last salary, are you basing it on your experienced level, your age, where is that number coming from? So, as a first step for research, you'll obviously go online and you'll start with sites like Glassdoor or salary.com, or PayScale, to do a little bit of reconnaissance on salary ranges. These sites let you look at salary ranges based on job title, city, industry, years of experience, level of education, and other factors. Now, keep in mind these ranges are based on user-submitted data.

So, they're fairly broad and just use them as a bit of a guidepost. The data is useful but not the absolute end all, be all. Naturally, you'll compare these numbers to your own current knowledge of the market rate. This can be based on what you're currently making, what peers are making, what ranges have been posted in job ads for similar roles. Multiple data points will help you zero in on the most accurate market range.

Sometimes the site Quora can be useful where members occasionally have anecdotal info about salary, compensation, and culture. There are also groups on LinkedIn and elsewhere where topics of salary and compensation can come up Recruiters are also a great source for this type of information. If you found the position through a recruiter, that recruiter might be willing to share some information about market rates or even specifics about how much a particular company's open to negotiation.

Now, don't take their word as gospel. At the end of the day, the recruiter gets paid by the company. But he also has a vested interest in making sure one of his candidates gets hired. Even if you found the job on your own, recruiters are always trying to network with people, especially good candidates, planting seeds with them and so on. So, try networking with them to the extent possible. Another tip when you're researching to make your case for the salary you want, you can refer back to some of the behavioral stories you might have used in your interview.

So, what you want is to have a bullet point ready for why you should get the salary commensurate to a top performer. Part of making a strong case is having highlights of those stories, ready to support your request. So, you might say something like, "Bob, part of the reason my aspiration is $80,000 is because I'm considered a top performer, and I'm a top performer because of A, B, C, and D. And I believed I'm going to bring the same level of effort and results to this role.So, whatever additional salary we agree on, the company's going to get a very high return on that. Because the investment you're making is not for an average performer, you're getting someone who will outperform in this role."

So, that's the type of answer that you might use where you justifying what you're asking

for. And remember, this is through not just in negotiation but in life. Perception is reality. If you undervalue yourself, have a low confidence, its something they immediately pick up on. The hiring manager, the recruiter, the HR person its what they're trained to do. They immediately sense, "Ah, this person doesn't really feel confident about what they're asking for.Doesn't really feel confident they should be getting this."

Sometimes the perception is conscious, sometimes it's unconscious. But they can kind of tell how confident you are. And part of building confidence is not only convincing the employer, but also convincing yourself that you deserve this higher salary. For example, maybe you've made $15 per hour in the past, doing some other job. But now you've gotten a lot more experience and knowledge and you'd like to get $35 an hour.

But if in the back of your mind, you don't feel you really deserve it, you're not going to be able to convince anyone else of it. Now, your salary request has to obviously be rooted in reality. You can't just randomly pick a number out of the hat, and not have, you know, anything to back it up. Or a big part of getting what you want is making a strong case for why you deserve that higher number, so, you've got to be careful not to overdo it.

Not to be completely delusional. But if the role offered $50,000 and you in fact want $70,000, then you might have a shot of getting it if you take the right steps and justify it. And there's another old saying that's very important which is, "Start high and justify." Now, another part of researching your worth is figuring out what you truly want. That's kind of important, kind of an important philosophical question.

Everyone asks the question of themselves, "What do I want?" And they say, "Well, I want more money." And that's not always enough. The reality is people do more for other factors than they do for money alone. Could be prestige, benefits, flexibility, whatever it happens to be. In a previous lesson, we talked about identifying and prioritizing what you want when it comes to tangible things that you can negotiate for like, you know, bonus, and benefits, and time off, etc.

But there are also intangibles that can make a big difference. You might accept the lower salary for a job that provides a much higher quality of life, or an easy commute, no late nights, whatever it might be. Or you might accept the lower salary right now for a job that will position you well to make much more in a year or two. If you only focus on money, you miss out on opportunities to "Expand the pie," like we mentioned earlier.

So, that's a little bit about researching your worth and getting more clarity on what's important to you.

Lesson 7: Persuasion

So let's talk about specific ways to persuade the other person to your point of view. We're going to talk first in general terms about how people are persuaded and then we'll

look how to adapt for an individual communication style. In terms of persuading people, your credibility is the starting point. So, how credible you are will dictate how easily you can influence a person you're dealing with. So your reputation, your relationship with this person, the trust that you're trying to build, that's the foundation. If you're able to convey credibility and trust early in the interview process, and you're fortunate enough to now negotiate directly with a hiring manager, that's going to be a tremendous help. And, if you're meeting with someone you haven't had a history with, like, let's say someone in HR, you know, it's still important to build trust, you're just going to have less time to do it.

So, in a case like that, your first impression on the HR person will set the tone for how easily it'll be to persuade them. When trying to convince them, you'll want to focus on the goal, the goal that's common to both you and the employer. So you'll likely want the highest salary and the best possible deal. But it needs to be framed from their point of view. They want to make a good hire. And they also want the best possible candidate.

So you want to start by supporting your case with evidence and a convincing rationale. So, if you're going in saying, "Well, I want $80,000 because I deserve it," that's probably not enough. Even when you're pointing to solid statistics and evidence, you may face resistance. You may have to use multiple approaches. Sometimes you don't know exactly what kind of person you're dealing with, so you have to try a few different angles to support your case.

Sometimes timing plays a key role. You need to assess the emotional state of the other party. You don't want to get stuck negotiating with someone that's in a bad mood. Maybe they had an argument with somebody, maybe they got cut off in traffic, maybe they just found out some bad news, who knows? You'll need to assess the emotional state of the other person and try to find a sweet spot of how hard to push or how soft to be.

In the negotiation, you need to be a student of psychology and recognize what's happening with this other person in terms of their face, their body, their tonality, whatever it happens to be. If they're cranky, you might need to adapt a bit, maybe even try rescheduling if you have to. If it's not the best time, it's not the best time. You don't want to necessarily try to push through right at that moment if they're not at their most receptive, just something to consider.

Sometimes your hands are tied and you can't reschedule, but there are some things you can do to build goodwill with them regardless of their mood, and we'll talk about that in a little bit of detail in the next lesson. Now, let's look at the concept of framing and reframing and how they can help you. Framing is how negotiators present or organize their issues, so it's how you're initially making your case based on what you think is important to the other person.

Reframing is the method of changing their way of seeing things, their way of seeing the issues. So, for instance, going back to the example we mentioned earlier, you're making a case or framing why you should get $80,000, and they're saying, "Well, no. We've never done anything like that before. The most we can do is $60,000." That is their frame. Their frame says $60,000 is the most they can do. So, reframing is about finding out more about the underlying reasons for that $60,000.

Maybe something in what they said gives you a clue. "No. We've never done that before." That tells you you have to position things in a different light that focuses on the fact that this person doesn't seem like a big fan of change. The question you'll be asking yourself is, "Is that a trait of this person or is it some specific issue with the organization?" You might consider saying, "Well, I can appreciate that, especially if you haven't had a history of paying anyone more than $60,000 for this kind of role. But I think in this case, it's not quite an apples to apples comparison, and I'll tell you why. With a candidate like me, you're getting something altogether different. You're getting a top performer.So it's not like you're really setting a precedent, here, between my background and past performance, and everything I bring to the table. It's a completely different kind of situation, where you're paying a different salary for a different type of candidate."

So, reframing is trying to take their way of explaining things and, kind of, how they see the world, and making your case based on that. That's influence. Negotiators use all kinds of frames. So if we use the $80,000 example again, it can be framed in a number of ways. One type of frame is just presenting the issue itself directly, and it's framed like, "Oh, I would like $80,000," and it's just based on that.

You just want $80,000, without any additional context. It's just the salary that you want. Another frame is about focusing on the outcome, or if they hire you for $80,000, you paint this great picture of all the amazing things you'll do and all the good that will come from having you on board, again, kind of, thinking about their point of view. Frames can be related to company policy or budgets. Frames can also be related to the person's self-identity, meaning if they feel they give into you, they feel like they've lost the negotiation.

So if they offered $60,000, and now they need to give you $80,000, they feel they lost, and they view it, kind of, as a win-lose scenario. So, your job is to get a sense of what frame this other person is using, and then reframe your ask. So, half the battle here is just getting a sense of the frames that this other person is using. How are they positioning this? Is their frame related to logic, or outcome, or process, or do they have some other personal quirk where it's important that they never feel like they lost.

And, by the way, you can actually challenge a person's frame. It's not set in stone. But it does require a little groundwork of trust and credibility that we touched on before. In subsequent lessons, we'll talk more about the psychology and the preferred communication style of the person you're dealing with.

Lesson 8: DISC Overview So now, we're going to talk about something really, really valuable, something which actually might change your life. It's called the DISC profile, and it's an acronym that stands for the four big types of communication styles people have. The Ds are dominators. The Is are influencers, the S, supporters, and the Cs are contemplators.The concept of the DISC profile has been around a long time, and the names people use for these categories can vary a bit. And let's stick with a simplified version of the basics here, just for the purposes of negotiation. But you may also be interested in reading more about the complexities of the DISC, or even completing an assessment yourself to learn more about your own communication style. When I said that DISC would change your life, you probably thought I'm exaggerating. But what we're going to cover in this lesson will help you not only with your negotiation, but will help you understand how to persuade anyone you ever meet.

I've used the DISC techniques very successfully for many years in sales. I've taught many other people how to close more deals through better understanding of communication styles. Let me ask you, have you ever met someone who you just didn't connect with? You're not sure why, but there was just something about them where the two of you didn't click?

I'm sure you have. Okay. Now, have you ever met someone where from the moment the two of you started talking, you were fast friends? You hit it off. You have a lot in common, and you connected, and it just feels right? Chances are you know what I'm talking about. So why do we connect with some people so quickly, and with others it seems like they're from another planet?

In a sense, you're not speaking the same language because there are four types of primary communication styles in the DISC profile that we're going to cover, and you fit into one of them. That means that three-quarters of humanity has a different communication style than you, and for all intents and purposes, speaks a completely different language than you do. So, those people that you meet and get along with from the second you're together, well, they're likely the same communication style as you, but the rest of the world isn't like you.

And if you want to influence them, it's your job to understand their language and adapt your approach to that different communication style. And obviously, this is very, very important in a negotiation. Let's look at the categories, and later we'll look at examples of the best ways to persuade negotiators in each of these categories. So the "D" in DISC are the dominators, or doers, or directors.

These are the people who when you speak with, they're very, very to-the-point, very quick, very direct, and, kind of, dominant. They're constantly cutting you off, really

focused on getting immediate results, making decisions quickly, and taking action, and taking authority, but they're not very detail-oriented. They're more big-picture, like, "Uh-huh, mhm, mhm, mhm, yep, got it, great, run with it."

So they look to evaluate your competence very quickly, and are very task-oriented. They don't want to dig into details, and if you give them too many details, their eyes will roll back in their head. What they're really looking for is, "Can I trust you? Are you giving me enough information quickly, succinctly, to demonstrate your competence? And then I can make a quick judgment call about, "Yes, you are the person I'm looking for, and I'm hiring you.'" The "I" in the DISC stands for influencers.

These are our networkers, our talkers, people who really enjoy socializing. They really enjoy being connectors and a hub of influence, hence their name. They're much more about generating enthusiasm and creating a motivating environment. And when you're trying to persuade them, they're influenced by who you know and how the decision to hire you will affect them in terms of their network and their world.

They are strongly influenced by social proof. If their best friend loves you, if you've worked for companies they admire, if you've got, you know, a reference letter from Mark Zuckerberg, you're gold to someone like that. They're very people-oriented, but, like our dominators, they're not very detail-driven. You can recognize them because they're much more chatty, much more friendly, much more like, "Hey, how's your mother? How's your sister? How's your father?"

Versus the Ds who are always like, "Uh-uh, mhm, mhm. Yeah. What can you do?When can you do it by? Mhm." So, that's an overview of our influencers. The "S" in the DISC are our supporters. These folks focus on cooperation, on consensus building to get stuff done. Like influencers, they're concerned about what other people think, about social proof, about evidence.

But they also really don't like conflict and they don't like rocking the boat. They want to keep things relatively predictable, and go down a well-established path. They want to see someone else having done this thing before them, someone else has beaten that path before, so they don't feel like their decision is a huge risk. And they're really concerned about the impact of a decision on the group.

So if you're negotiating with someone like this, and you're asking for $80,000, but they've historically offered only $60,000, they're going to be really concerned about, like, "Oh, wait. What if somebody else finds out about this? What if they get upset?" So that's a little bit on our supporters. And then the last one is the "C" in the DISC. These are our contemplators. These are our conscientious folks, much more analytical, much more numbers-driven, evidence-driven.

They're focused on ensuring things are done with quality and accuracy, very influenced

by numbers and impartial sources, not really influenced by social proof or vague, flashy things. They're much more analytical in their approach. And, as a generalization, think of accountants, or engineers, or some people in IT, mathematically inclined, mathematically oriented, as a generalization.

Again, it's a broad generalization, but think of people you know who are super-analytical, super numbers-based, super task-oriented. They're likely contemplators. In the next lesson, we'll talk about how to negotiate with each of these different communication styles.

Lesson 9: Adapting your approach using DISC

Now that we've covered the categories of the DISC, let's talk about how to negotiate with each style. We'll start with negotiating with a "D." When making a case for what you want with a D, you need to be very quick and to the point. Succinctly giving them the bullet points of how giving you what you want will benefit them. If you start going off on tangents or giving too much detail, you're going to lose them. What they want to see from you is clear thinking, clear answers, and confidence to help them make a decision quickly. If a deal offers you $60,000 and you want $80,000, you might say, "Well, Bob, I can see where you're coming from and $60,000 makes total sense when you're hiring a typical candidate, but with me, you're bringing in a top performer. And for this kind of role, I've seen a range from $60,000 to $90,000. And based on my background and past success, I feel I can deliver way more in terms of benefits, A, B, C, and D, all of which seem important to you and the department. So, I'm not picking a number out of a hat, my aspiration is for $80,000 because my research, my past results, and what I feel I can bring to the organization."

So, a deal will be much more likely to be influenced by a quick and confident approach that focuses on the benefits to them. Our "I's," or influencers, are obviously quite different. They'll talk about, in glowing terms, about themselves, the company, the role, the quality of life, mostly vague, not a lot of detail. So, if they're making you an offer, it might sound like, "Hey, Alex.Yes, we're prepared to offer you $60,000 and that's what we're going to be going with. And we're really excited to have you on board. We think it's going to be an amazing opportunity for you. And yeah, we want you to be part of our family, you know, there's so much opportunity for growth and all these cool things that you can do here. And, you know, yeah, we have amazing benefits, package, you know, which HR will talk about and I really think this is going to a great place for you in terms of growing with us and growing with our family."

So, that's kind of the approach that they take. Big picture, a bit vague, they're pushing the fact that this is going to be an awesome place to work with without getting into too many specifics. So, if they make an offer that sounds a lot like that, you might say, "Well, Bob, I totally see where you're coming from with $60,000. I'm really looking for something closer to $80,000 and I'll tell you why, because I really think I can do an

amazing job here, you're going to be really happy with what I can do. And you know, working this whole team looks amazing, it looks really great. And you know what? When I was doing my research, I spoke to a buddy of mine at XYZ, and they've been hiring people at around $80,000 as well. And it seems like that's the going rate for top talent and it looks like you guys are obviously really focused on bringing in the best possible talent. So, I really want to work here, I think it's an amazing place, I think there's a lot of opportunity for growth here, but based on what I know I can do, based on my past history, my ideal situation is closer to $80,000."

And again, an "I," an influencer, can make decisions very quickly, just like a D, but they're much more influenced by personality and social proof. So, you're now pointing to the fact that you're going to make them look good. You're giving, you know, some good talking points about the company and how amazing it is and you're also touching on a couple of bits of social proof about what other companies have been doing, what you've seen, so on and so forth.

So now, we'll talk about our "S" in the DISC, the supporter. When you're talking to them and trying to influence them, they tend to want to feel appreciated. They don't really want conflict in a negotiation, not typically. They may even give you a "yes" or verbally agree to something just to avoid conflict and then come back to you later, via email, say, "Oh, no. I can't do that," because they just don't want to say no to you on the spot.

They don't really like multi-tasking during a negotiation. So, let's say you're trying to negotiate a whole package for coming on board with this organization, they may want to focus only on the salary piece first before talking about anything else. So, they tend to stay on one topic at a time and they also tend to make every little item of a negotiation a priority. Another thing to keep in mind is that they don't like to be rushed into a decision.

Where our dominators and influencers make decisions quickly, our supporters and contemplators do not. They prefer taking their time to think things over and resent trying to be rushed. They're really big on social proof. So, if you're looking to influence them, it will help you to point to other examples, to point to past history and references, that's what they value and moves them.

So, if a supporter offers you $60,000 and you want $80,000, you might say, "Well, I can appreciate that especially if you haven't had a history of paying more than $60,000 for a typical candidate. But I think, in this case, it's not quite an apples to apples comparison and everyone looking at this would understand why this is a different situation. So, with a candidate like me, you're getting something altogether different. You're getting a proven top performer. So, just like in professional sports, no one's paid the exact same salary, it's based on a player's past performance and expectations. So, between my background and past performance and everything else I bring to the table, it's a completely different situation, you're paying a different salary for a different type of candidate, and it's common practice for a lot of companies."

So, those are some things to think about when dealing with a supporter. And finally, let's talk about how to negotiate with our "C" in the DISC, the contemplators, the conscientious, or analytical, or data-driven kind of folks. These are people that, when they look at buying an iPad, they're not looking at the cool pictures of people enjoying life, no, they're going in and they're looking at the text banks, how much storage, how much memory, what features they absolutely love, details.

And that's exactly how they're influenced in a negotiation. When you're negotiating with a C, they have a very clear idea of what they want and what they don't and they're looking for the same level of clarity in you. They think analytically and they're very big on using pros and cons. So, if you're making a case for something, they're going to ask you a ton of "why" questions, "Why this?Why that? Why do you feel you need to make $80,000? Why do you feel you need this compensation package? Why do you feel you need a company car?"

Whatever it happens to be, they'll always ask you to justify each detail of what you want. And if it's not evidence-based and convincing, you're not going to get it. They use a very systematic approach and they actually appreciate when people notice. Just like with the supporters, they don't like to be rushed and need time to consider things. So, when you're presenting your case, you can increase your credibility with a C by specifically encouraging that they take their time to evaluate things, weigh the pros and cons of what you're proposing.

If you're asking for $80,000 and they only want to offer $60,000, you've got to run through the pros and cons of giving you $80,000. And you can basically say something to the effect of, "Based on my past history, I believe I can do A, B, C, and D taking into account everything I've done before, based on what I know about the company, and all the people involved. But on the other hand, you're going to really have to evaluate if this is the right fit for you.Evaluate if you can fit it into the budget, you know, evaluate if there is a good ROI for paying an extra $20,000 for somebody of my experience.Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, it's something to think about. And you should, honestly, you should take all the time you need to evaluate it and see if it's really the right fit and the right thing to do."

And by doing something like that, by positioning yourself in that way, like, "Hey, here are the pros of paying $20,000 extra and here are the cons," you can actually raise your trust level and credibility with this person and it may help you get what you want. So, there you have it, the specifics about how to adapt your style to influence all the different types of people you might encounter in your negotiations.

Lesson 10: Determining the DISC communication style So, we've talked about the DISC communication styles and how to have greater success at influencing each of the four Iprofiles. But how can you tell what communication style

someone prefers? Unfortunately, you probably can't have the other person take a DISC personality assessment before your negotiation, as useful as that would be. But there is a quick trick that will help you tell what a person likely is, and it's all based on two powerful questions. When you meet the person during a negotiation, you can ask yourself these two questions about the other person and the answers will give you a good sense of where they fit on the DISC profile and how to best persuade them. But before I reveal those questions, as part of this exercise, I want you to think about three people in your life that you know well, at least one of them a professional contact.

So, think of these three people, two personal, one professional and take a moment to write down their names. If you need to pause the video, go right ahead, but just jot down the names of these three people and then I'll mention the questions for you to ask yourself. Great. So, take a look at your three names. For each of these people, I want you to ask yourself this first question.

Question one, are they more dominant or easygoing? Are they more dominant or easygoing? Now, I don't want you to overthink this, go with your gut, your first impression. And you can only give one answer, one or the other. Of course, every individual is complex with many different components, but if you had to pick either dominant or easygoing, what would it be? Make a note next to the name of each person on your list, dominant or easygoing, for person one, person two, person three, pause if you need a second.

Now, the second question. Question two, are they more task oriented or people oriented? Again, don't overthink it, are they more task oriented or people oriented? For each of the three people, make a little note there. So, what have we done here? It's a quick trick to help you diagnose how to speak someone's language. And it works even if you've just met the person if you pay a little bit of attention.

Now that you have your answers for those three people, you can look at the DISC chart here and identify their most likely communication style. If we answer the first question, are they more dominant or easygoing, and they're more dominant, that means they're either a "D" or an "I," they fall into one of those two boxes. If they're more easygoing, then they're more likely to be a "C" or an "S."

So, that's the first step, dividing them into those two areas with that first question. So, question two, are they more task oriented or people oriented? Well, if they're more task-oriented, they're more likely to be a "D" or a "C," and if they're more people-oriented, they're more likely to be an "I" or an "S." So, to sum it up, someone who is more dominant and task-oriented, likely a "D," someone who is more dominant but people-oriented, more likely an "I."

Someone who is more easygoing and people-oriented, likely an "S," and someone who

is more easygoing but task oriented is likely a "C." Now, thinking back on what you wrote about those three people that you know, how accurate is the picture? Think back to our overview of the four communication styles, does the diagnosis kind of fit there?

What about your own communication style? When you're talking with someone for just a few minutes, it's hard to feel like you really know them deeply. However, you can start to get a quick sense of where they are. If they're like, "Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom," and they're talking very rapidly, and on point, and they don't have time for a lot of chit chat, and they're not particularly detail oriented, then they're likely to be a D.

If they're thoughtful, and methodical, and very detail oriented, and not impressed by fast talkers, they're probably a C. It's not a perfect science, but by doing something like this, you actually give yourself a huge advantage. By going in with a little bit of a decent guess, you now have a sense of what kind of language these other people will best respond to. Otherwise, you're just going to use your default way of communicating, which honestly, will only work on maybe about a quarter of the world out there, a quarter of the people who are similar to you.

Remember, 75% of people out there are not like you, they don't share the same kind of communication style. Pro tip here, depending on who you're negotiating with, you might even be able to find some information about them online that can give you some clues. Maybe the hiring manager gave a talk at an industry conference or maybe the HR director has a video on her LinkedIn page, so there could be some additional ways to research people's styles.

We've covered a lot of ground in these lessons and the main takeaway here is that negotiation is a skill, a learnable skill, and it just requires a little bit of practice. So, go out there in the world and try these techniques before the job offer negotiation. You don't want to use these skills, for the first time when the stakes are really high. Try negotiating in the real world, maybe when you're shopping, or buying a car, or convincing your kid to do his homework, see what you can do.

It's important that you get comfortable doing this because for most people, it's not comfortable. Negotiating when they don't have a lot of experience is challenging, so it's important to get as much practice as you can and hone your skills and iron out those nerves. Also, practice asking those two DISC questions about the people that you meet and try to determine their communication style. See how well you do and refine your observation skills.

In addition to doing real-life practice negotiations, trying role playing for the actual negotiation with a friend or family member. Role play getting the offer and your first response. Role play getting pushback on the counteroffer, and trying to reframe things from your counterpart's perspective. And again, the time you put into this, you're going to get back 100 fold.

Learning negotiation is one of the best life skills you could learn. It was great spending time with you, you are now one giant step closer to closing the deal on a sweet compensation package. You have all the skills you need, you just have to go out there and use them. Now, go out there and get yourself paid.