Writing Assignment
MSL 665
Coaching & Conflict Resolution
Belhaven University
Unit 6
Coaching Through Conflict
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Unit 6 Introduction
Unit Six of the Coaching & Conflict Resolution
course takes an in-depth look at conflict and a
coach’s best approach to dealing with the different
types of conflict.
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Unit 6 Topics
Types of Conflict
Conflict Styles
Conflict-Handling
Coaching: Nature of Design Thinking
Course Level Competencies
Objective 1.1: Define and identify components of best
practices of coaching, mentoring, and conflict resolution.
Objective 3.1: Analyze internal and external dynamics
of teams.
Objective 3.2: Practice effective conflict resolution skills
through use of role play.
Objective 5.1: Demonstrate professional conduct in oral
communication, written communication, presentation
skills, and punctuality.
Objective 5.2: Identify attributes of God-centered conflict
resolution and coaching.
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Unit 6 Objectives
MSL 665
Coaching & Conflict Resolution
Belhaven University
Unit 6.1 Lecture
Types of Conflict
Conflict Styles
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How do you approach conflict?
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Coaching & Conflict Resolution
from https://www.slideshare.net/SMITARASTOGI3/conflict-management-63764350
Types of Conflict
Work with your team to discuss examples of
each of these conflicts. Make suggestions for
how to effectively deal with each type.
Intra-personal: struggles within a person.
Inter-personal: conflict between two people.
Intra-group: conflict within a group.
Inter-group: two different groups in conflict with
one another.
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Types of Conflict – Intra-personal
Inner conflicts are often about questions of
integrity, values, and ethics — about doing the
right thing versus what you want to do.
Inner conflict can be difficult to recognize.
Sometimes this conflict is difficult to live with.
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Types of Conflict – Intra-personal Examples
You know you should go to a meeting where an important social issue will be discussed and a strategy developed. However, you are tired and would really prefer to stay home. Your conscience says “go” and your body says “stay.”
You disagree with your boss about a decision that has just been made. Part of you thinks you should be strong and voice your opposition. Another part of you says to just sit tight.
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Types of Conflict – Inter-personal Conflict
This is conflict between two or more people.
May be caused by a number of different factors:
Personality clashes.
Culture clashes.
Differences in values.
Breakdown in communication.
Unmet expectations.
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Types of Conflict – Intra-group Conflict
Conflict within a group.
For example, harassment between groups of
teammates. Veterans and rookies in the NFL.
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Types of Conflict – Inter-group Conflict
Group conflict may be independent of the people
occupying the roles.
For example, conflict between marketing and
production is common.
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Our Approach to Conflict Affects the Outcome
The situation and the importance of the issue(s).
Our skill sets for dealing with conflict (style,
communication both verbal/non-verbal).
Our comfort zone from previous experiences.
The politics/dynamics.
Suggestions and/advice from others.
Timing.
Other factors?
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What gets in your way when you approach
conflict?
What do you use to your advantage to find
success?
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Causes of Conflict
Conflict can arise when any one or more of the
following causes occur.
Put a check by the ones that you have
personally experienced.
Work in teams to come up with some real world
examples of these causes.
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Causes of Conflict, cont. Resources: time, staff, money, etc.
Goals: different visions for success, etc.
Personality Differences: extraverts/introverts,
etc.
Psychological Needs: respect, power,
belonging, etc.
Values: honesty, fidelity, etc.
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Causes of Conflict, cont. Rules/regulations/policies: interpretations, etc.
Customs/habits: tapping your pencil,
procrastination, etc.
Egos/competition: only one winner, I want your
job, etc.
Information: too little or too much.
Physical or mental health issues:
Others?
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Assumptions Conflict is avoidable.
Conflict is not avoidable. Not everyone is going to
like or agree with everyone else.
Conflict produces inappropriate reactions by
the people involved.
Sometimes reactions are inappropriate.
Sometimes they are very appropriate.
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Conflict creates polarization within the
organization.
Communities can become polarized over things
like whether they need a new high school or
whether the present school is adequate.
We should avoid conflict.
Trying to stop all conflict is a waste of time and
energy.
Conflict can have either constructive or
destructive effects.
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De-escalation of Conflict
A conflict will de-escalate when:
People focus on the problem, not the person.
Emotions are expressed directly.
Any threats are reduced or eliminated.
There is a history of cooperation.
Needs are discussed openly.
People use conflict resolution skills.
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Escalation of Conflict A conflict will usually escalate when:
Others get involved.
Someone feels threatened.
Important needs are not acknowledged
and/or met.
There is no interest in maintaining a
relationship.
There is a history of unproductive conflict.
People do not have or do not use conflict
resolution techniques.
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Conflict Styles
There are five basic “reactions” or styles to deal
with conflict.
In 1974, The Thomas Kilmann Instrument® was
developed by Kenneth W. Thomas and Ralph
H. Kilmann (1977) to make the differences in
conflict styles more understandable and useful.
The TKI uses two axes (influenced by the
Robert R. Mouton and Jane Blake axes):
"assertiveness" and "cooperativeness.”
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Conflict Styles, cont.
It is a self-report conflict style inventory using 30
pairs of forced choice answers.
We are a combination of all the types. There are no
right or wrong types.
Learning about your conflict ‘style’ will help you
better understand yourself and others.
For those of you that panicked in Lecture 4, this is an
assessment.
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Thomas-Kilmann Instrument
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Axis What it Impacts
Assertiveness The degree to which you satisfy your own concerns, needs and
desires.
Cooperativeness The degree to which you satisfy another person's concerns, needs
and desires.
Conflict Styles
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High
Assertiveness
Low
Competing Collaborating
Compromising
Avoiding Accommodating
Cooperativeness
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https://washingtonmonthly.com/2015/02/15/how-president-obama-handles-conflict/
Competing: “My Way or the Highway”
Characterized by:
Asserting your position without considering
other viewpoints.
High assertiveness, low cooperativeness.
Should be used:
Sparingly.
On vital issues when collaborating is not
feasible.
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Competing, cont.
Solutions are imposed.
Power struggles.
Issues are decided through arbitration or by a
manager.
Very competitive process.
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Coaching & Conflict Resolution
Ending 6.1 and getting into 6.2
Conflict-Handling
Coaching: Nature of Design Thinking
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MSL 665
Coaching & Conflict Resolution
Belhaven University
Unit 6.2 Lecture
Conflict-Handling
Coaching: Nature of Design Thinking
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Coaching & Conflict Resolution
https://www.slideshare.net/SMITARASTOGI3/conflict-management-63764350 Slide 21
Avoiding: “Leave Well Enough Alone”
Characterized by:
Stalling or ignoring an issue.
Low assertiveness, low cooperativeness.
Should be used:
Conflict is emotional.
Little can be gained.
Issue should be postponed.
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Avoiding
Withdrawal.
Ignoring or hiding issues that would contribute to
the conflict.
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Compromising: “Let’s Make a Deal” Characterized by:
Finding a middle ground by achieving some goals and
conceding on others.
Moderate assertiveness, moderate cooperativeness.
Should be used:
Not on vital issues.
When competing and collaborating are not practical.
In a turn-taking fashion.
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Compromising
Give something to get something.
Some accommodation and adjustments are
used to get acceptable outcomes.
Outcomes may be acceptable but they are not
the best.
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Accommodating: “Kill Them with Kindness” Characterized by:
Focusing on the goals and concerns of others.
Low assertiveness, with cooperativeness.
Should be used:
Yield to a better position.
You are overruled.
It is important to others.
Clean up hard feelings.
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Accommodating
Soften harshness, emotions, or main issues to
maintain peace and harmony.
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Collaborating: “Two Heads are Better than
One”
Characterized by:
Desire to fully satisfy both sides of an issue.
High assertiveness, high cooperativeness.
Should be used:
Under conditions that enable collaboration.
On important issues.
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Collaborating
Issues are uncovered, conversation
encouraged, and conflict is resolved.
Only the collaborating style achieves real
conflict resolution.
Problem-solving (collaborating) identifies and
works through the causes of conflict.
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Mental Preparation for Conflict
Most important part of preparation is attitude.
Conflict resolution skills can help us deal with
our fears.
More than one way to satisfy concerns.
Good preparation means success.
Know the issues involved.
Plan your strategy.
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Mental Preparation for Conflict Do your homework.
Look at the situation through the other person’s
eyes.
Brainstorm some options with your colleagues.
Know your hot buttons (stressors).
What makes you feel angry, defensive,
fearful, or guilty?
Ok, you ready to coach a coworker through
conflict or behavioral change?
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Use this information to begin coaching.
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Coaching & Conflict Resolution
https://davisassociates.co.uk/invest-in-executive-coaching/
The Nature of Design Thinking
Design thinking, a concept born of the world of
architects and artists, provides some important
principles for co-creating plans with coaching clients.
Like architects, coaches support clients in creating a
clear vision of what they want to build and help make
plans to create strong foundations and frameworks on
which to build. In the design process, the coach as
“architect” takes a solution-focused approach,
incorporating both analysis and imagination.
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Designing the Coaching Program
The startup of a coaching program sets the tone for
the entire coaching relationship both by establishing
trust and rapport and by creating an inspiring and
engaging vision and goals on which a client will work
for weeks and months to come. The design of the
relationship—including the principles of empathy,
positivity, creative collaboration, and a learning and
growth mindset through experimentation—is ideally
conveyed to the client at the outset.
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Startup Coaching Session
An initial coaching session is typically focused on
gaining a good understanding of the client’s
history, strengths, and goals as well as to start
building a vision and plan.
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Startup Coaching Session, cont.
It is important to explain that the objectives for the
first coaching session include discussing
assessment results (if an assessment was part of
the startup phase); learning more about the
client’s priorities, strengths, goals, motivators,
challenges, and resources; and supporting the
client in developing a plan (including a vision,
three-month behavioral goals, and several first
week goals).
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In a Coaching Session, you will want to
revisit our past lectures. It’s important to
cover:
Designing Visions
The Importance of Motivation
Make sure Goals are following the SMART
formula: Specific, Measurable, Action-based, Realistic, Time-bound
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The Client Is in the Driver’s Seat
Be sure clients understand that they may turn away
from any challenge or goal. It is always their
choice. If they seem intrigued by a behavioral goal
but intimidated by the challenge, encourage them
to make a counterproposal that is more
comfortable.
The job of the coach is to find the balance between
challenging clients to do more than they think they
can do while encouraging a scaling back of goals
that are out of reach.
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Complete reading assignments.
Complete writing assignments.
Answer discussion questions.
Complete unit quiz.
Complete your Zoom session.
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What’s next?
Kilmann, R. H., & Thomas, K. W. (1977). Developing a forced-choice
measure of conflict-handling behavior: The MODE instrument.
Educational and Psychological Measurement 37(2), 309–325.
Moore, M., Jackson, E., Moran-Tschannen, B. (2016). Coaching psychology
manual (2nd ed.). New York: Wolters-Kluwer.
William, M. (2015). Survivor skills for supervisors. Penn State University,
Office of Human Resources.
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References
Image References
Carr, B. (2018 May 28). Handling conflict in the workplace. Retrieved from
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Re1GqWGon8
Davis, N. (2017 July 20). Executive coaching to unlock your potential.
Retrieved from https://davisassociates.co.uk/invest-in-executive-
coaching/
Dual Concern Model. (2013). Retrieved from
https://washingtonmonthly.com/2015/02/15/how-president-obama-
handles-conflict/
Rastogi, S. (2016 July 6). Conflict-handling intensions (Slide 21). Retrieved
from https://www.slideshare.net/SMITARASTOGI3/conflict-
management-63764350