The Power of Persuasion

Feedback #1

Hi, Dirck - You earned a grade of B on this paper (83%). Well done! However, please read through my feedback below and review the comments on the submission. Then, contact me so we can get you on track. You can do it!

You are off to a great start! However, your explanation of the topic's importance within the scenario and in your life is far too general. You want to provide a specific example so that you can focus your topic. The more specific examples you have, the better you are set to write the proposal.

Your audience description is on the right path; good job, but it needs more specific, clear details. You understand your audience, but you need to make clear why the topic is important to it. Whenever your descriptions are vague or too general, you may be unable to communicate clearly with your audience. Contact me if you want to talk about your audience. drk@strayer.edu

Nice start; you have found four or five sources. However, not only do you need five sources, but not all of these sources fulfill the requirements, including being relevant and credible. In addition, you might not have provided an opposing source to help you develop all aspects of your persuasive proposal. Review your sources carefully. You have a good foundation for your research, but you might want to return to the Strayer Library and search in the ENG215 Library Guide (linked on the Library home page) and contact the librarians for help (also linked on the home page, library@strayer.edu). We're here to help, too!

You are on your way to writing good summaries. Your summaries are based on most of the 5Ws (who, what, why, where, when); however, in some sources you have not applied the 5Ws, or you might not be writing as clearly and concisely as needed; some confusion may exist..

Good start on this section; however, it is incomplete. You have not described how all sources would be used to support your position, or you have you analyzed the credibility and relevance of all sources. You have only partially addressed fewer that four of the five sources. It is important that you understand how to use your sources and understand their credibility in order to write an effective proposal . See ch. 3.11.

Well done. You have made a good start to your analysis! However, it is incomplete, and you have either not discussed more than four of the five sources, or described how these sources fulfill a purpose, or present a variety of perspectives, or demonstrate an ethical approach to research. See ch. 3.11

You are off to a good start, but please edit carefully because 5-6 errors remain. As you know, you demonstrate your credibility through clear, concise writing and demonstrate your credibility through good organization, grammar, style, and correct use of Strayer Writing Standards.