The Moths by Helena Maria Viramontes Essay

Last Name 1

Student’s Name

Professor Dybala

English 1302: CRN

Date:

Essay Two Revisions

As you continue to mark-up the hard copy of your essay two, eight paragraph draft, include the following revisions utilizing the OWL resource links. (A.) Type the sentence as you state it in your first draft; then, (B.) type the revised version of the sentence under it. A revision adds more information, improves word choices, or removes unnecessary words or other content improvements. Review my sample thesis sentences on #1. Then, you may remove them or write your (A.) original thesis and (B.) Revised thesis under my examples.

1. Thesis Sentence: Using your classmate’s suggestions or your own ideas revise one of the main components: narrowed topic, argumentative, interpretive claim, or four specific subtopics:

A. The narrator’s Abuelita helps her to grow up and change.

B. The narrator’s low self-esteem and antisocial behavior escalate because of the lack of support of her immediate family, but the magical powers of her Abuelita provide transformative spiritual guidance to the young teenager enabling her to reshape her hands and feel relief, make use of her hands in Abuelita’s kitchen and garden, recognize her Abuelita’s protective guardianship, and reciprocate her generosity and love.

2. Select a long or wordy sentence that you would like to revise and use the paramedic method as outlined in this link: https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/academic_writing/paramedic_method.html

A. (Select one of your sentences)

B.

3. Find a dropped quotation: a quote that lacks an introduction or has a very brief signal phrase. I have included a sample (A.) original introduction to a quote and (B.) a revised introduction to a quote. Improve the introduction by adding the context of the quote as recommended in Part I of this link: https://www.wikihow.com/Put-a-Quote-in-an-Essay

https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/teacher_and_tutor_resources/preventing_plagiarism/avoiding_plagiarism/handout_quoting_others.html

A. Abuelita says, “You’re still alive, aren’t you?”

B. When her granddaughter questions her remedies, Abuelita reassures her: “You’re still alive, aren’t you?” (304).

4. Check each body paragraph to ensure that it begins with a topic sentence that narrows the focus to a subtopic and states your argument.

A.

B.