revise my essay

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Saeed Aljaberi EAS 1060 1

Gun Control

In the lights of often heard reports of shooting in public places together with constant

reports of violence, it is not a complete surprise that the issue of gun possessing became so

important nowadays. While some people consider guns to be a part of must-have modern

weapon possession, others are tremendously worried about the consequences of the gun increase.

Therefore, the issue remains highly controversial in the United States. However, the USA are

already on the top of the list of the countries possessing one of the highest amount of guns per

capita. Still, the level of mass shootings seems to increase. Moreover, it is noticed that people

prefer to commit suicides with guns. Consequently, strict gun controls are to be taken to make

the United States safer place.

Though guns have become a part of American culture, the issue of gun restriction is

urgent nowadays. According to statistics, the number of suicides committed with firearms

steadily increase. The number of suicides exceeds the number of homicides almost twice.

However, the main issue is that many of them could have been prevented if the mean was not as

deadly as a gun. Though there is no possibility to eliminate the number of the suicides, the thing

that matters is the availability of lethal means. A study conducted by the Harvard School of

Public Health demonstrates a strong connection between “rates of firearm ownership and

suicides” (Shultz et al., 2013). A survey reveals that the rates of suicides are higher in the states

where guns prevail. Vice versa, states that reported less gun ownership experienced

proportionally fewer rates of the deaths. Consequently, many lives could have been saved if the

laws restricted guns possession as the majority of suicides are committed under the influence of

MELISSA MENDELSON
20000001096260
So, there are some parts of this introduction that you'll want to cite sources for.
MELISSA MENDELSON
20000001096260
Rather than making such a strong thesis statement in terms of your beliefs, what do we know about gun violence that suggests gun control will make the U.S. safer? For example, is there research that shows by having strict gun laws that gun violence will go down? If so, then you can have a more detailed thesis that offers a more objective statement.
MELISSA MENDELSON
20000001096260
Excellent. Just the kind of evidence we need to discuss the issue.

Saeed Aljaberi EAS 1060 2

panic or desperation. The feeling comes and pass, but the effect of the deadly weapon is

irreducible.

Another point for the strict gun control concerns the crime rate. The United States has

“the highest rates of firearm deaths, suicides, and homicides among the world’s 34 “advanced

economies” (Shults et al., 2013). The world’s practice reveals that reducement of available

weapons results in decreasing of shootings. The question of gun restriction gets worse in

connection with frequent shootings committed by students. Consequently, when families possess

no guns and the possibility to purchase it is almost impossible, the children with mental diseases

would not be able to use this weapon. About one-third of firearm-related deaths are homicides.

Firearms were used in almost “seventy-two percent of the murders nationwide” (Dodson, 2016).

Statistics also reveal that the bottom states of the reported firearm murders were the ones that

have the lowest rate of gun possession. The survey also examined the practice of the European

countries. According to the data collected, the nations with the law firearm home possession

consequently reported lower gun-related homicide and suicide rate (Killias, 1993). Eventually,

the restriction of gun possession will result in the reducement of the deaths related to the firearm

usage.

However, some people argue that the second amendment gives the right for people to

possess guns. They state that The Founders recognized that the right to own the gun is essential

and fundamental for people. It is of the same importance as the rights of free press, speech, and

freedom of religion. Notably, however, that the guns laws are more than two hundred years old.

MELISSA MENDELSON
20000001096260
I don't quite see the purpose of this paragraph since the purpose of the essay is exploratory and not argumentative. Instead of this paragraph, consider a paragraph that discusses what gun control would look like. What policies are in place in other countries that have reduced gun violence? What kinds of restrictions and policies would encourage a reduction in gun violence?
MELISSA MENDELSON
20000001096260
Let's see some evidence here to support these statements.

Saeed Aljaberi EAS 1060 3

Nevertheless, another argument stands for using guns in a purpose of self-defense. People tend to

feel more secure when they are sure they are able to protect themselves and their beloved ones.

That is also a basic human right. Moreover, Constitution of thirty-seven states of America allows

the usage of guns to protect either oneself of the state. Statistics also reveal that people,

especially women, feel safer when owning a gun. Nevertheless, it seems paradoxical that the

availability of firearms for everyone makes people feel secure. Literally, anyone would be able to

put the lives of others under a thread. For example, no one will say that the more wars are

conducted all over the world makes him feel that humankind is on a right way for establishing

peace. Still, the accessibility of firearm cause the feelings of protection.

Considering all mentioned, one may see that the issue of gun control is vital. When the

matter concerns the benefits of the whole society, the personal preferences should be omitted.

The facts prove that the policy of gun restriction will result in reducement of both suicides and

crimes. The world’s practice demonstrates the correlation between gun possession and the rate of

firearm-related crimes. The U.S. statistics also reveal the dependence between the availability of

guns and the number of suicides and murders. The arguments for free gun possession are not

significant. It is true, that second amendment allows people to own guns. However, the law

regarding this issue should be revised in light of modern realia. Furthermore, the claim to feel

oneself safer when guns are in free access also is too controversial. Therefore, it seems logical,

that the government should take measures to control gun public accessibility as well as private

ownership.

Saeed Aljaberi EAS 1060 4

References

Dodson, N. A. (2016). Adolescent gun violence prevention: What we know, and what we can do

to keep young people safe. Curr Opin Pediatr., 28(4), 441-446.

doi:10.1097/MOP.0000000000000372

Killias, M. (1993). International correlations between gun ownership and rates of homicide and

suicide. CMAJ: Canadian Medical Association Journal, 148(10), 1721–1725.

Shultz, J. M. et al., (2013). Fatal school shootings and the epidemiological context of firearm

mortality in the United States. Disaster Health, 1(2), 84–101.

http://doi.org/10.4161/dish.26897