Discussion
Chapter 3
The Self Part 2
Today’s Outline
We’ll discuss the Self and information processing
Variety of different effects
Self-esteem
Assumptions and findings
Too much self-esteem (narcissism)
Self and Information Processing
Last class we discussed how people learn about themselves through others (and often in a biased manner)
But we also learn about the world differently when what we’re learning is related to our “self”
The mind pays more attention and processes things more thoroughly when they relate to us
Self and Information Processing
Self-Reference Effect
If you ask participants questions about words (e.g. is it a long word, does it rhyme with ___, or does this word describe you?)
Then later ask them to recall the words
People recall words much better if they considered whether it described them or not
And if they had answered ‘yes it describes me’, they remember it even better
Self and Information Processing
Cocktail Effect
Similarly, if you hear your name at a party, you immediately attend to it, even though you had been screening out other words/conversations
*Mnemonic Tip
In my memory class, I tell students to relate information they are trying to study to themselves any way that they can
It greatly increases recollection
As an example, when I was studying personality disorders, I tried to think of at least one person in my life who behaved most similarly to a given disorder
Self and Information Processing
Endowment Effect
We value something more once we own it
Even if that ownership is brief
Or we value something more once we choose it
E.g. participants who chose a lottery ticket offered to sell it for more than one they were given (even though both had the same odds of winning)
Self and Information Processing
Additionally, each of these effects, though statistically small effects, were significant:
We have more friends/associates whose name begins with the same letter as ours
People are more likely to choose a career if the career is similar to their name or begins with the first letter as their name
E.g. Dennis the Dentist, Pete the Plumber, etc.
People are more likely to live in a state with a similar name
E.g. George in Georgia, Virginia in Virginia
These associations aren’t on a conscious level, that would just be dumb, but they happen non-conscious thanks to the Duplex Mind.
Self and Information Processing
Survival Processing
Any information you hear related to your own survival will be much more likely to be remembered
This is, of course, an adaptive thing to happen
E.g. if you hear that eating something will increase the rate of a heart attack or that putting a fork in an electric socket will electrocute you
Changing the Self
Our self concept can change, but it usually does so slowly
One way to successfully change ourselves is to change our situation/circumstances
One important reason this works is because how we view ourselves is often a reflection of how people view us
And the way other people view us stays relatively stable over time
Starting over somewhere new can cause that to change
Self-esteem
As self-esteem arose as a concept, some assumptions followed from it:
For example, low self-esteem teenage girls are more likely to get pressured into sex
Or bullies really have low self-esteem and bully to build themselves up
And kids with high self-esteem will do better in school
Self-esteem
Surprisingly, those assumptions were not supported, in fact, it was usually the opposite:
Teens with high self-esteem were more likely have sex, for guys and girls. High self-esteem teens were more likely to try drugs as well
Bullies have high self-esteem and may be more likely to bully when that esteem is/was threatened
People who stand up to bullies also have high self-esteem
Bullied kids actually have low-esteem
And kids who get good grades have high self-esteem, not the other way around
Self-esteem
Some things we know about people with low self-esteem
They don’t usually perceive themselves in negative terms, but rather neutral ones, “I’m soso”
They are less confident they will succeed and are extra concerned with not failing, embarrassing themselves, and rejection
More prone to emotional highs and lows
Can have conflicting opinions of themselves, e.g. I’m good at math but I’m also bad at math
Self-esteem
People with low self-esteem:
*linked with depression, and what comes with that is:
People with depression actually perceive the world more accurately than mentally healthy people
People with depression take equal credit/blame for success and failure
People with depression accurately estimate how much control they have over events
People with depression accurately estimate how much people like them
Self-esteem
People with high self-esteem
Are generally happier
Are more likely to speak up in meetings/be assertive
They resist influence better
They bounce back faster/easier when life hits them with tragedy
*But they also harbor many positive illusions!
Overestimate their good qualities; also perceive their good traits as rare and their bad traits as common
Overestimate control over events, like getting a good job
Are unrealistically optimistic
Self-esteem
How do people with high self-esteem maintain their distorted view of reality?
Don’t things burst their bubble?
Self-serving bias explains part of it
High self-esteem people take credit for success and attribute it to internal factors (I’m smart)
Failures are due to external
factors, not my fault
Similarly, receiving criticism is
processed as junk mail and
disregarded. Aka “Fake News!”
Self-esteem
One last note about high self-esteem is that it prevents fear of death/one’s own mortality
This is called Terror Management Theory
So, if people with high self-esteem have so many positive illusions, how do they operate in the world?
Wouldn’t they misjudge their chances of something and fall on their face?
Strangely, when it comes to making most decisions, people’s general self-esteem doesn’t enter the equation and their decision-making remains ok
Self-esteem
Is high self-esteem always good though?
Let’s take an in-depth look at one of the most common personality styles
Enter the Narcissist!
According to Greek mythology, Narcissus was a young man who fell in love with his own reflection and just basically stared at it until he died
Narcissism
In modern times, narcissism is understood as a personality style that someone may have; it could range from normal/healthy to having a full-blown narcissistic personality disorder
But, this disorder is NOT really about physical vanity....
Side note: it’s also it’s
more common in men
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (DSM)
Characteristics:
wanting excessive admiration
e.g. social media, we'll come back to this...
grandiose sense of self-importance
sense of entitlement
e.g. "why should I have to wait in line?!"
exploits others & has low empathy
e.g. "a friend helps Bob move, but Bob doesn't reciprocate"
often envious of others & believes others to be envious of him/her
proud, arrogant, cocky
Extreme Example
Charlie Sheen
look for the signs as you watch this video
Describe something Sheen said that indicates one of these....
Wanting excessive admiration?
“I’m bi-winning”, “I have a bitching Rockstar life style most people can only dream of”
Grandiose sense of self-importance?
Warner Brothers 🡪 Charlie Brothers, tiger blood & Adonis dna
Sense of entitlement?
Expects to be able to be on drugs at work (leaning on the chair)
Exploits others & has low empathy?
He gave people something magical (dangerous drugs) and then says he may forget them but they won’t forget him
Believes others to be envious of him?
Implies everyone wants to receive phone calls from ‘marquis names’
Proud, arrogant, cocky
Narcissism
Now there are other diagnoses for Mr. Sheen, such as bipolar. And certainly the effects of drugs
But any mood disorder can still certainly co-occur with personality styles and disorders
We shouldn’t diagnose without a licensed therapist administering a proper examination, but I would be floored if at minimum he didn’t have a narcissistic personality style
What's really going on with Narcissism
Externalized, fragile self-esteem
Self-esteem appears quite high, and usually is, but it’s also volatile! It can drop in the face of failure or rejection
"I'm only as good as my achievements"
Failure hits narcissists VERY hard
e.g. not being accepted into a school
Belief: not worthy of love if they are ugly, unsuccessful, get bad grades, etc.
Fragile self-esteem visible when slighted or rejected
Can trigger narcissistic rage
What about a less extreme example?
Overachiever
Too competitive
Gets mad when he/she loses. Lashes out
Grudge-bearer or revenge seeker
Classic villain example...
Someone who was insulted and cuts all ties with that person
Overly proud and arrogant -->
Social media conaseurs
Narcissism has been described as a rising epidemic
Effects up to 16% of the population
Have a care to spot narcissists in your life
Be suspicious of people who shift blame to you when it’s their fault; or gaslight (“Are you crazy?”)
Social media connoisseurs
"Everyone should care about what I'm doing because I'm interesting, hot, or funny!”
Narcissists more likely to post on social media
I post on Facebook all the time though…so don’t feel too badly
Society Encourages narcissism....
Typical goals (all narcissistic):
1. Be successful!
2. Be attractive!
3. Make $$!
4. Have an attractive husband/wife
Helping people or making the world better? Nah
Narcissism is self-reinforcing:
Study to be successful, get good grades, feel good or get praised, repeat cycle
Or work out to be hot, get hit on, feel good, repeat
At their best...at their worst...
At their worst:
a narcissist would be delusional, fragile, and lonely
At their best:
narcissists can achieve a great deal, truly care for other people in their life, and become paragons of society that people DO look up to
Note to remember: want to succeed/look good, and having positive illusions = mentally healthy!!
but not in the extreme and not with a lack of empathy
Personality Styles/Disorders
There are many other personality styles that we could cover (histrionic, OCD, dependent, etc.), but that would be beyond our current scope for this class
Note though, that social psychology is very closely associated with personality psychology
They often go hand-in-hand