ONLINE Comm in the Bus Envir Section 01 Final Test
Chapter 5
Organizing and Writing Business Messages
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Topics in This Chapter
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Research Methods
Ways to Organize and Group Ideas
The Direct and Indirect Patterns
How to Create Effective Sentences
How to Create Effective Paragraphs
Accessing information electronically on the Internet and in databases
Searching manually in books, articles, and other secondary sources
Investigating primary sources, such as interviews and surveys
Experimenting scientifically with control groups
Types of Formal Research Methods
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Looking in the company files
Talking with your boss
Interviewing the target audience
Conducting an informal survey
Brainstorming for ideas
Developing a cluster diagram
Types of Informal Research Methods and Idea Generation
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Use Cluster Diagrams to Generate, Organize, and Classify Ideas
Gifts and premiums
Paid gym membership
Financial incentives
Peer mentors
Smoking- cessation programs
Seminars and workshops
Improving employee health
Guest speakers
Flex time for workouts
New menu in cafeteria
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Analyze the ideas generated in the original cluster diagram.
Cross out ideas that are obviously irrelevant; simplify and clarify.
Add new ideas that seem appropriate.
Study the ideas for similarities.
Tips for Organizing Ideas in a Cluster Diagram
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Group similar ideas into classifications.
Prepare an outline if the organization seems clear.
Make subcluster circles around each classification for further visualization.
Tips for Organizing Ideas in a Cluster Diagram
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Methods for Organizing Ideas
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Listing
Outlining
The Alphanumeric Outline
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The Decimal Outline
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Define the main topic (purpose of message) in the title.
Divide the main topic into major components or classifications (preferably three to five); if necessary, combine small components into one larger category.
Break each major component into subpoints.
Tips for Making Outlines
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Avoid putting a single item under a major component; if you have only one subpoint, integrate it with the main item above it or reorganize.
Try to make each component exclusive (no overlapping).
Use details, illustrations, and evidence to support subpoints.
Tips for Making Outlines
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Methods for Grouping Ideas Into Patterns
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The direct pattern for receptive audiences
The indirect pattern for unreceptive audiences
For Receptive Audiences, Use the Direct Pattern to Group Ideas
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For Unreceptive Audiences, Use the Indirect Pattern to Group Ideas
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Recognize phrases and clauses.
Clauses have subjects and verbs; phrases do not.
Independent clauses are complete; dependent clauses are not.
Phrases and dependent clauses cannot function as sentences.
Creating Effective Sentences
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Recognize phrases and clauses.
Independent clause: They were eating pizza
Dependent clause: that they want
Phrase: to return for a refund
Creating Effective Sentences
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Avoid fragments (incomplete sentences).
Fragment: E-mail seems boring. When compared with Twitter.
Revision: E-mail seems boring when compared with Twitter.
Creating Effective Sentences
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Avoid run-ons (a sentence with two independent clauses – without a coordinating conjunction or a semicolon).
Run-on: He posts updates hourly he’s always connected.
Revision: He posts updates hourly; he’s always connected.
Revision: He posts updates hourly. He’s always connected.
Creating Effective Sentences
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Avoid comma splices (joining two independent clauses without using a coordinating conjunction).
Splice: Her BlackBerry is part of her, she can’t live without it.
Revision: Her BlackBerry is part of her; she can’t live without it.
Revision: Her BlackBerry is part of her. She can’t live without it.
Creating Effective Sentences
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Use short sentences.
Creating Effective Sentences
Sentences under 20 words are most readable.
| Sentence Length | Comprehension Rate |
| 8 words | 100% |
| 15 words | 90% |
| 19 words | 80% |
| 28 words | 50% |
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Emphasize the most important ideas by using vivid words.
Creating Effective Sentences
| General | Vivid |
| One business uses personal selling techniques. | Avon uses face-to-face selling techniques. |
| The skyscraper is very tall. | The Empire State Building is 102 stories tall. |
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Emphasize the main idea by labeling it.
Creating Effective Sentences
| Unlabeled | Labeled |
| Explore the possibility of leasing a site, but also hire a consultant. | Explore the possibility of leasing a site; but, most important, hire a consultant. |
| Include a copy of the sales receipt with the defective item you’re returning. | It’s essential you include a copy of the sales receipt with the defective item you’re returning. |
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Emphasize the most important idea by placing it first or last in a sentence.
Creating Effective Sentences
| Unemphatic | Emphatic |
| All production and administrative personnel will meet on May 23, at which time we will announce a new plan of salary incentives. | On May 23 all personnel will meet to learn about salary incentives. |
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Emphasize the most important idea by placing it in a simple sentence or in an independent clause.
Creating Effective Sentences
| Unemphatic | Emphatic |
| Although you are the first trainee that we have hired for this program, we have interviewed many candidates and expect to expand the program in the future. | You are the first trainee that we have hired for this program. |
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Emphasize the most important idea by making sure it is the subject of the sentence.
Creating Effective Sentences
| Unemphatic | Emphatic |
| The report was written by Courtney. (De-emphasizes Courtney; emphasizes the report) | Courtney wrote the report. (Emphasizes Courtney) |
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Use active-voice verbs for most sentences.
Example of an active-voice expression: We lost money.
Use passive-voice verbs to de-emphasize the performer or to be tactful.
Example of a passive-voice expression: Money was lost (by us).
Creating Effective Sentences
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Use Active Voice for Directness, Vigor, and Clarity
| Direct and Clear in Active Voice | Indirect and Less Clear in Passive Voice |
| The manager completed performance reviews for all employees. | Performance reviews were completed for all employees by the manager. |
| Evelyn initiated a customer service blog last year. | A customer service blog was initiated last year. |
| IBM will accept applications after January 1. | Applications will be accepted after January 1 by IBM. |
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Use Passive Voice to Be Tactful or to Emphasize the Action Rather Than the Doer
| Less Tactful or Effective in Active Voice | More Tactful or Effective in Passive Voice |
| We cannot grant you credit. | Credit cannot be granted. |
| The CEO made a huge error in projecting profits. | A huge error was made in projecting profits. |
| I launched a successful fitness program for our company last year. | A successful fitness program was launched for our company last year. |
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Avoid misplaced modifiers by keeping phrases close to the words they describe.
Creating Effective Sentences
| Not This | But This |
| An autopsy revealed the cause of death to be strangulation by the coroner. | An autopsy by the coroner revealed the cause of death to be strangulation. |
| Sam bought a used computer from the salesperson with a faulty mouse. | Sam bought a used computer with a faulty mouse from the salesperson. |
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Avoid dangling modifiers (a word or phrase that modifies a word not clearly stated in the sentence).
Creating Effective Sentences
| Not This | But This |
| Walking down the street, our sign is easy to see. | Walking down the street, people can easily see our sign. |
| When six years old, my family moved to Pittsburgh. | When I was six years old, my family moved to Pittsburgh. |
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To create effective paragraphs, discuss only one topic in a paragraph.
Drafting Effective Paragraphs
¶
Group similar ideas together.
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›
Arrange paragraphs in one of these plans.
Drafting Effective Paragraphs
¶
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Direct Plan
Main sentence followed by supporting sentences (best for defining, classifying, illustrating, and describing ideas)
Pivoting Plan
Limiting sentences, main sentence, supporting sentences (for comparing and contrasting)
Indirect Plan
Supporting sentences, main sentence (good for describing causes followed by effects)
To build coherence, link ideas with one of these devices.
Drafting Effective Paragraphs
¶
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›
Sustain the key idea
Repeat a key expression or use a similar one throughout a paragraph.
Dovetail sentences
Connect the beginning of each new sentence with a word from the end of the previous sentence.
Use a pronoun
Use a pronoun in one sentence to refer to a noun in the previous sentence.
Sustain the key idea by repeating or rephrasing it.
For example, Our philosophy holds that every customer is really a guest. All new employees to our theme parks learn to treat guests as VIPs. Employees never tell these VIPs what they can or cannot do.
Techniques for Building Coherence
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Dovetail sentences by connecting the beginning of each new sentence with a word from the end of the previous sentence.
For example, New hosts and hostesses learn about the theme park and its facilities. These facilities include telephones, food services, bathrooms, and attractions.
Techniques for Building Coherence
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›
Use a pronoun in one sentence to link to its antecedent.
For example, All new park employees receive a two-week orientation. They learn that every staffer has a vital role in preparing for the show.
Techniques for Building Coherence
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›
To further build coherence, use transitional expressions.
Techniques for Building Coherence
| To Add or Strengthen | To Show Cause and Effect | To Suggest Contrast |
| additionally | consequently | by contrast |
| again | as a result | conversely |
| also | for this reason | on the contrary |
| likewise | therefore | on the other hand |
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To further build coherence, use transitional expressions.
Techniques for Building Coherence
| To Show Time or Order | To Clarify | To Contradict |
| after | for example | actually |
| before | in other words | however |
| earlier | for instance | instead |
| finally | I mean | rather |
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›
By John S. Donnellan
Compose short paragraphs.
Drafting Effective Paragraphs
Paragraphs with eight or fewer printed lines are most readable – and will reduce the chances your audience will fall asleep!
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End
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Ch. 5, Slide ‹#›