Final Presentation
Chapter 3
Interpersonal Communication and the Self
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Section 1 COMMUNICATION AND THE SELF-CONCEPT
Interplay
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Communication and the Self-Concept
Self-concept: relatively stable set of perceptions you hold of yourself
Self-esteem: part of the self-concept that involves evaluations of self-worth
How does high or low self-esteem affect communication behavior?
All individuals hold a specific perception of themselves, and one piece of such perceptions is feelings of self-worth. People who feel good about themselves have positive expectations about how they will communicate, and those feelings increase the chances that communication will be successful (the same is true for negative evaluations).
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How the Self-Concept Develops
Reflected appraisal: A mirroring of the judgments of those around you
Significant others: People whose evaluations are especially influential
Social comparison: Evaluating ourselves in terms of how we compare with others
Reference groups: People against whom we evaluate our own characteristics
An individual’s self-concept develops over time, influenced by supportive messages from others, especially those who are particularly influential in our lives, and the way we compare ourselves to other people.
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Characteristics of the Self-Concept
The self-concept is subjective
We inflate and/or underestimate our self-perception
Why?
Obsolete information
Distorted feedback
The myth of perfection
Social expectations
Sometimes we view ourselves more harshly than others view us, and sometimes we view ourselves more favorably than others view us. This is related to the fact that sometimes we let our past influence the way we view ourselves, we let overly critical messages influences us the most, we try to be perfect, and we live in a society that tends to reward those who actually downplay their strengths.
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Characteristics of the Self-Concept
A healthy self-concept is flexible
The self-concept resists change
Cognitive conservatism: Seeking information that conforms to an existing self-concept
Human beings change overtime, and the self-concept can change, too – but typically, it is difficult for such changes to occur because we often try to confirm our existing self-concept instead of allowing it to adjust.
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The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy and Communication
Self-fulfilling prophecy: When a person’s expectations of an event and his or her behavior based on those expectations make the outcome more likely to occur than would otherwise have been the case.
Four stages:
Holding expectation (for yourself or for others)
Behaving in accordance with that expectation
The expectation coming to pass
Reinforcing the original expectation
Sometimes, the things we expect to happen influence our behaviors to the point that those things we expect are even more likely to occur because the belief is being reinforced.
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Types of Self-Fulfilling Prophecies
Self-imposed prophecies
Your own expectations influence your behavior
Other-imposed prophecies
When one person’s expectations govern another’s actions, whether positive or negative
Observer must communicate their belief for the prediction to have an effect
Setting your own expectations can often influence your own behaviors, and setting your expectations for others can also influence their behaviors if those expectations are effectively communicated.
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Section 2 PRESENTING THE SELF
Interplay
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Public and Private Selves
Perceived self: The person you believe yourself to be in moments of honest self-reflection
Presenting self: Public image—the way we want to appear to others
Facework: Verbal and nonverbal ways we act in order to maintain our presenting image and the image of others
People tend to try to manage the impression they make on others, which is based on how one perceives oneself (which may or may not be accurate) and what one believes to be a socially approved image; we use nonverbals and verbals to maintain face with others.
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Characteristics of Impression Management
We strive to construct multiple identities
Impression management is collaborative
We improvise scenes where our character reacts with others
Impression management can be deliberate or unconscious
Impression management involves attempting to use the appropriate identity for a situation, which typically features others who are also trying to manage the impression of others. This process can be both intentional and unintentional.
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Face-to-Face Impression Management
Manner
Words
Nonverbal actions
Appearance
Personal items people use to shape an image
Setting
Physical items we use to influence how others view us
In order to manage how people see us in face-to-face settings, we use words and nonverbals, alter our physical appearance, and use our surroundings to add to the impression.
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Impression Management in Social Media
The Internet offers an opportunity for people to present themselves in a variety of ways
In mediated identity management, how do the factors of manner, appearance, and setting change?
How do these changes make it easier or more difficult to manage identity?
Social networking platforms provide opportunities to share or withhold certain types of information in order to manage how other people see them.
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Impression Management and Honesty
People sometimes misrepresent themselves to gain the trust of others
Deception in cyberspace is common
There is not only one honest way to behave in every circumstance
Impression management involves deciding which face—which part of yourself—to reveal
People have to make choices about how they will represent themselves in every situation, and sometimes those choices can be deceptive, which invites certain questions about when it is okay to withhold certain details about oneself.
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Section 3 DISCLOSING THE SELF
Interplay
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Disclosing the Self
Self-disclosure: Information about the self that is purposefully communicated to another person
Distinguishing factors of self-disclosure:
Honesty
Depth
Availability of information
Context of sharing
Self-disclosure is a process that features the self as the subject, is intentional and directed at another person, is honest and revealing, contains information generally unavailable from others, and with its intimate nature often determined by context.
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Models of Self-Disclosure
Degrees of Self-Disclosure: The Social Penetration Model (Altman and Taylor)
Two dimensions:
Breadth of information shared
Depth of information shared
Development of a relationship is a progression from the periphery of the model to its center
Types of information revealed:
Clichés—ritualized, stock responses
Facts
Opinions
Feelings
The Social Penetration Model provides a framework to represent how people share information. The model represents the range of information shared and how personal those messages are, which influences the level of intimacy in the relationship.
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Social Penetration Model
The Social Penetration Model represents the variety of topics to be discussed and how personal those topics can get.
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Johari Window Model
The Johari Window Model illustrates different areas that represent things about you that are known to yourself and to others. Whether or not you are willing to share that information depends on whether that information is known to yourself and others, not known to the self, not known to others, or not known to any parties involved.
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Benefits and Risks of Self-Disclosure
Benefits:
Catharsis
Self-clarification
Self-validation
Reciprocity
Impression formation
Relationship maintenance and enhancement
Moral obligation
Neither all-out disclosure nor complete privacy is ideal, but there are obvious benefits to sharing information about oneself, which include feeling better, clarifying beliefs or opinions, confirming beliefs about yourself, others sharing with you, making ourselves look more attractive, maintaining our relationships or making them better, and because it might be morally right to do so.
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Benefits and Risks of Self-Disclosure
Risks:
Rejection
Negative impression
Decrease in relational satisfaction
Loss of influence
Loss of control
Hurt the other person
Opening up to others can involve risks, such as feeling rejected, giving a negative impression, feeling less satisfied with a relationship, loss of control of how others view you, or hurting the person you’re sharing with.
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Guidelines for Self Disclosure
Is the other person important to you?
Is the risk of disclosing reasonable?
Is the self-disclosure appropriate?
Is the disclosure reciprocated?
Will the effect be constructive?
In order to self-disclose effectively, it is important to consider whether the person is someone you wish to grow closer with, whether the benefits of disclosing outweigh the risks, whether it is appropriate information to share, whether the other person will self-disclose to you, and whether the disclosure will be helpful.
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Alternatives to Self-Disclosure
Silence
Lying
Benevolent lies—not malicious
Equivocation
Equivocal language: Two or more plausible meanings
Hinting
Seeks to get desired response from other person
If self-disclosure doesn’t seem to be appropriate, there are a few things you can do. You might choose to keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself, deliberately hide the truth, make statements that avoid unpleasantness, or send a message that is direct while still saving face.
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The Ethics of Evasion
Provides a way to manage difficult situations
Times when honesty is the right approach, even when painful
Consider:
Are the effects of a lie worth the deception?
Is the indirect message in the interest of the receiver?
Is evasion the only way to behave?
How would others respond if they knew what you were really thinking/feeling?
Sometimes it is most appropriate to be honest, and in those cases it is useful to weigh the effects of telling a lie, whether what you are saying is in the best interests of the receiver of the message, if there is another option besides evasion, and how people would respond if they knew what you were really thinking.
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